Bound
by ObdurateSinner
Summary: Pro MMA fighter Levi Ackerman personally takes on a student for the first time ever. It goes against his norm but there's just something that draws Levi about the brunette that so desperately wants to win a fight against his ex. However, fighting isn't the only thing Levi wants to train Eren in. BDSM-themed story. Rated M for adult themes, language and smut. Slow build.
1. Chapter 1: Levi

**Firstly, thank you for choosing to read this. Hopefully all those who asked me for a multi-chapter BDSM story are all here!**

 **IMPORTANT. This is a BDSM themed story. It will touch on truths, misconceptions and very many kinks. I am not going to put trigger warnings at the start of every chapter, but triggers may include consensual-nonconsent, bondage, humiliation and many more. There will be NO scat, watersports, or any other types of kinks involving bodily fluids.**

 **Secondly, this story is mostly unplanned so we will see where it goes! The main pairing will be Levi x Eren but expect very many more.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin, it's characters, or any other brands or establishments mentioned in this story.**

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The second Levi first saw the brunette, he knew he wanted the boy. Honestly, who wouldn't? Twenty-two year old Eren Yeager was tall, with naturally bronzed skin stretching sinuously over finely-cut muscles from head to toe. Everything about the boy was mouth-watering, from his large, veiny hands to his long, shapely legs; yet while everything about Eren was intoxicating, his eyes were by far the most breath-taking of his assets.

The startling emerald color of the boy's orbs was so vibrantly green it was surreal. They looked as though they were stunning paintings rather than a person's ocular devices, but Eren's uncensored emotions personified them. When the light was just right, staccato flecks of blue danced among the vibrant green to make the boy's eyes look like the misty oceanic coast of a desert.

Levi often wondered what those fierce eyes looked like in the throes of passion.

As that thought once again crossed his mind, Levi looked before him into a pair of emerald eyes. They were brave yet deeply afraid, tired yet alert, and while they were focused on him and nothing else, they seemed to be staring right through him. Yet they were not the emerald eyes of the beautiful brunette; they were the eyes of someone who was irrefutably his at this very moment.

His mind shouldn't be on someone else right now.

The man silently berated himself for losing his focus at such a critical time. While the woman kneeling before him had undoubtedly not realized that his mind had wandered briefly, the fact that it had was unprofessional, immature and potentially hazardous. Taking a deep breath to center himself once more, Levi quickly regained his composure. He would punish himself later for his critical slip, but right now, the woman before him needed and deserved his undivided attention.

Giving the exquisite specimen before him an appreciative glance, Levi took a moment to admire her. She was of average height, and while she had an athletic figure, it was a natural and soft physique rather than one formed through hours of committed training. Her face was sweet and angelic, and her large emerald eyes held nothing but innocence and expectation. The flaming red hair on her head was neatly tied into two pigtails, only adding to the innocence her entirety displayed. What detracted from the innocence, however, was what Levi was admiring about the woman.

Kneeling before Levi with her legs widely spread and locked in place by a steel spreader bar, the woman's mouth was gagged by a black rope and her arms secured firmly behind her back with thicker red ropes. Her body was exposed to Levi, the buds on her perky breasts painfully hardened by the delicate tortures the man had administered thus far, and her thighs wet from the arousal trickling from her most intimate part.

Everything about her position made the innocence in her eyes look like the farce that it was.

This was the very reason Levi _never_ judged a person on face value. He would never have guessed that the sweet married woman before him, his childhood friend, was someone who got off from having her fears exploited. Who would've been able to tell that the sweet, angelic Isabel Magnolia, a kindergarten teacher and lover of all animals liked to cry and be forced to orgasm through her tears? Not a single living person would've been able to guess that even if they had a gun pointed to their head.

It made Levi wonder what dark secrets Eren Yeager might have.

Clenching his jaw, Levi forced himself to refocus. Why was it that an inconsequential brat was stealing his attention at a time when he should be focused on nothing else? When had he become so easily distracted in the first place?

Bringing himself back to the here and now, Levi's eyes keenly followed the violet wand that trailed lightly over the soft skin of the woman's throat. The contact with her throat could've been a razor-sharp blade given the way she reacted, tensing as if she were anticipating pain. He watched her reaction carefully, sternly reminding himself that the woman before him was not only his plaything but also his responsibility. She was not only his submissive at this moment in time, but she was his best friend first and foremost, and after this play she would still be so. He could not afford to lose his composure.

Trailing the wand over the sensitive skin on her neck, allowing it to ghost against the beautiful black and pink leather collar that marked his ownership, Levi very quickly cleared his mind of the inconsequential brat. He spent a moment to admire the simple collar that served as a reminder of the thought that he had just a minute ago – she was not only his plaything, but also his responsibility.

It was his responsibility to dominate her, to satisfy her need to submit to him, and to take care of her once that need has been satisfied. It was a responsibility he loved, and being able to administer the treatment the woman desired was an absolute pleasure.

Walking about her, Levi drank in the tremors rocking her frame. While she was no doubt anxious to receive the light tickles of electricity the wand could administer, she trembled from the sheer exhaustion of having to kneel perfectly upright with her legs so widely spread for such an extended period of time. Levi knew she was strong, but he also knew that she was approaching her limit. Her trembling was also the result of the arousal coursing through her body thanks to the snug-fitting bullet vibrator inserted into her most intimate part, the frequency set low enough to tease but high enough to entice.

Having edged her twice already, Levi toyed with the idea of denying her release entirely. When discussing the parameters of today's play, he had explicitly stated that he may or may not allow her to orgasm; she had agreed, submitting to his will before the cool leather of the collar touched her neck.

Levi let his finger glide across the 'on' button of the wand, causing a crackling buzz to shatter the silence in the room. Isabel gasped and pinched her eyes shut, clenching her jaw as her anxiety grew. Even though she knew that the purple tendrils would do no more than tickle her skin, the long build-up of the play and her fragile psychological state made her deathly afraid of what her trusted Dom would do next.

It was this fear that she craved.

"Eyes open," Levi said, his voice quiet yet stern. He wanted to see the fear in her eyes, not only for his satisfaction but also so that he could ascertain that he was taking her to the heights she wished to ascend to.

With a gulp, Isabel complied. Levi cooed praise as she opened her eyes, staring dead ahead and fighting tooth and nail to not shut them. She knew that any disobedience would be met with punishment, and even though she felt fear for what would happen next, her greatest fear in that moment was not being able to reach her crescendo.

Glancing at the bells and pleased that they were still fast in Isabel's hand, Levi decided to continue. He watched carefully as the woman before him shifted uneasily, desperately trying and failing to school her panting as her breaths grew heavier and more frantic. It was not getting out of hand just yet, but Levi had to keep her calm.

Cupping her face gently, Levi looked deep into her eyes and whispered, "Breathe, Izzy." He took a deep breath in to demonstrate, and she followed suit. Together, they held their breaths, Levi releasing his a moment before Isabel. He repeated this several times until the redhead was no longer panting. "Good girl. That's better. Breathe deeply."

Isabel focused only on her breathing then. She would breathe in, hold her breath for two seconds, and then exhale slowly. Her compliance ensured her serenity, and with her focus solely on that calm, Levi stalked about her like a predator eyeing his prey. With his sub so tightly wound, it would only be a matter of minutes, seconds even before she would completely come undone.

He would push her to her limits as she expected him to.

His arm shot forward then, the very tip of the wand coming into contact with the hardened bud on her one breast. Purple tendrils sprang forth to lick the woman's hardened flesh, sending a sharp shock through her body that had her throwing her head back and shutting her eyes as a cry tore from her gagged mouth. The tremors that had gently rocked her body turned to violent convulsions, and as Levi held the device in place his eyes jumped to the bells in the woman's hand; they had not fallen yet.

Her wordless permission allowed Levi a moment to drink in the sight before him – the woman was gasping and writhing, caught between pain and pleasure and her body begging for more of the latter. Her eyes were frantic, her muscles taut, and the small wiggles of her hips betrayed how desperately she needed to be touched. Right now Levi had the power to grant or deny her orgasm, and as he watched the beauty before him tear up as her arousal became too painful to bear, he realized that that was the _only_ control he head.

She was the one in charge. She set up the boundaries, she dictated what he could and could not do to her, and she approached him when she wanted to play. Her hand had drawn the outlines and all Levi was tasked with was coloring in the picture. And when she was satisfied, she would be the one to say _stop_.

Trailing the wand across the woman's chest to the other hardened bud, Levi increased the voltage just as he reached her sensitive flesh. The sudden sting that slapped the woman's nipple caused her to cry out yet again, a light jungle of bells being fondled catching Levi's attention above her hoarse cry. While they hadn't fallen to the ground yet, Isabel's grip on them had weakened substantially; those minutes had definitely turned to seconds now.

It was now time to deliver the kill shot.

In one sinuous movement, Levi tore the wand from the woman's breast, increasing the voltage to maximum as he pressed it against her engorged clitoris and set the frequency of the bullet vibrator to its highest setting.

As expected, the double-headed assault threw her over the edge.

With a cry that sounded like that of a woman in suffering, the woman writhed and fell forward, pleasure raping her. Levi immediately fell to his knees before her, catching his dearest sub as she fell, paralyzed by the pleasure that had been previously denied to her. Gasping and choking and sporadically convulsing, the orgasmic delight engulfed every cell in her body as she was stimulated from the outside and the inside until she could bear the contact of either no more.

The bells fell to the floor.

As soon as the familiar jingle caught Levi's ear, he turned off both the wand and the bullet vibrator, relieving the convulsing woman of the vibrations and tingles that had her over-stimulated. She immediately breathed out a sigh of relief and fell limply against Levi, her face finding the crook of his neck. The wetness that smeared against Levi's skin confirmed what he already knew; she was crying.

He let her silently release her tears on him as he deftly undid her binds, making light work of the intricate rope work binding her arms and gagging her beautiful mouth. The spreader bar unlatched with ease. As soon as she was no longer restricted, she shifted closer to Levi and embraced him tightly. Her arms wrapped around his broad shoulders, her bare chest pressing against his clothed torso as she pulled him close.

In this moment, she needed nothing else. Levi was her world.

As Levi sat on the floor with the naked woman, he thought back to the beginning of their unique relationship. In the beginning, so much was needed to reassure her after she had been pushed too far. He would have to caress her, utter sweet reassurances to her and sometimes even spend a night in her bed holding her before she felt stable enough to conquer the world outside their play area. Now, years down the line, she was secure enough to require only his presence to assist her in reconnecting with the world around them.

Time ticked by as the pair embraced on the floor. Levi patiently waited as Isabel re-centered herself. He waited with her, holding her as she held him, reminding her through his presence alone that he would protect her. She was his responsibility; while she wore her collar, she was his entirely, his submissive, but at the end of a play and even beyond that, she was his best friend.

"Thank you," she eventually whispered, lifting her head.

"You're welcome," Levi replied, caressing her cheek where her tears had dried. "How are you feeling?"

Smiling lazily, Isabel answered, "Fantastic."

Levi nodded in agreement; the dazed look in her eyes and the unnaturally peaceful demeanor of the usually energetic redhead bore testimony to the sheer magnitude of tranquility her mind possessed. It was the feeling Levi worked so hard to impart on her, and seeing her lost in it made him extremely proud of his abilities as her Dom.

"That's good," he said.

"Can you please get Farlan?" Isabel asked uncertainly.

"Of course," Levi quickly replied. "Let me just get you into a comfortable position."

Agreeing with a nod, Isabel allowed Levi to pick her up off the floor. The man was strong for his height, but then again, with his ranking in the professional sporting world, it was to be expected. He could easily squat twice times his body weight; picking up a dainty woman was nothing more than a warm-up to him.

He placed her on a couch in a corner of the room. Laying her down and making sure she was comfortable, Levi gave her a warning before gently removing the bullet from within her. He placed it in a little tub of disinfectant before turning his attention back to his sub, placing a blanket over her body and bringing a cola to the table beside the couch.

"Is there anything else you need?" he asked as he knelt beside her.

"No," she answered. "I just want my husband."

Smiling at her bratty pout, Levi nodded in understanding. Before he could leave, however, there was one thing he needed to do.

"May I remove your collar, Izzy?" he asked.

Nodding, Isabel said, "Yes you may. Thank you, Sir."

Levi quickly removed the single item that ensured he and his best friend were not equals; the symbol of his ownership of her and his dominance over her. He secured it neatly and placed it on the table beside the cola, giving Isabel's bare neck a soft caress as he admired how free she suddenly appeared.

"Levi," Isabel called. It never ceased to amaze the man how quickly she could snap out of her submissive state. "Go. I want my husband."

"Geez," Levi said as he stood. "Such a fucking brat."

"That's why you love me!" Isabel teased.

Clicking his tongue, Levi turned away. "I wouldn't love you if you were the last living thing on earth."

With that, he left the room, leaving an elated Isabel giggling like a school girl on the couch.

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 **Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, that concludes chapter one.**

 **Now as you see we're not jumping straight into the Levi x Eren - PLOT DEVELOPMENT, people! If you can't stand reading other pairings such as the one above, you're in for a displeasing read so perhaps it's better to vacate.**

 **BDSM isn't all sex, folks. It isn't kinky foreplay. A lot of plays, like in the scene above, are not done with lovers. If you are keen to continue reading, thank you and I hope you enjoy the rest of the story. The plot will also develop extensively outside of BDSM but you'd be sure to learn a lot if you are not active in the BDSM scene.**

 **OS**


	2. Chapter 2: Eren

**Thanks to the reviewers of chapter one! For those who favorited and followed, welcome. I sincerely hope you enjoy the journey.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Snk, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

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Eren remembered the first time he sparred.

He didn't have his own equipment. The only thing that belonged to him was his gum-guard. Not even the gloves he wore were his. He distinctly remembered how uncomfortable they sat on his hands, how dirty and smelly the head-guard was, and how the straps of the shin-guards chafed against his sweaty calves until he bled. Eren remembered struggling to maneuver with all the ill-fitting equipment strapped to his body, he remembered the frustration of having his field of vision restricted, and he remembered cussing as he struggled to apply the techniques learnt on the bag to a moving person.

There were a lot of things Eren remembered about his first time sparring, but the thing he remembered most was the first time he tasted his own blood.

It wasn't the first time he'd been punched in the face. In fact, it was probably the hundredth. The hot-headed brawler had eaten more knuckle-sandwiches in his life than sandwiches themselves. However, this was the first time Eren Yeager had been punched in the face with consent.

Jean Kirstein. His height and weight were similar to Eren Yeager's, yet somehow the well-groomed brunette looked significantly more muscular. The condescending smirk on the brunette's face as he flexed his muscles before Eren made the novice's blood boil – all Eren wanted to do was wipe that smug grin off the man's pretty face. Perhaps the fact that Jean was so damn good looking was what set Eren off, but whatever the case was, as soon as the buzzer sounded, Eren forgot every single fighting technique he'd learnt in the weeks leading up to this day.

He attacked with absolutely no control. Punching and kicking relentlessly as he did in the brawls he so often found himself in as a teenager, Eren's sloppiness made it easy for Jean to dodge and defend. So easy, in fact, that the brunette ended up _laughing at_ Eren, taunting him for his inexperience. It only made Eren angrier. Eren's anger, in turn, only made his fighting sloppier.

Then Jean _winked_ at Eren.

Before Eren could even process having seen those smoldering hazel eyes focused on him and a wink being thrown his way, pain unlike any other exploded across his face. A sickening crunching sound filled the air before all sound was lost to him. The dizzying feeling of absolute weightlessness suddenly encompassed him, lasting all of two seconds before the cold padded floor of the fighting ring smacked against Eren's bare back.

The air had gotten knocked out of Eren's lungs, but when the nauseating metallic taste of blood filled his mouth, breathing was the least of his concerns. Gasping and choking as he struggled to spit up mouthfuls of his own blood, Eren, for once in his life, gladly accepted the help of another person as a fellow fighter lifted him into a sitting position. She rubbed his back and chest, helping him breathe one spastic gasp at a time until he was able to stand and clean himself off.

That particular memory returned to Eren now as he sat beside the ring with an ice pack wrapped snugly in a cloth and pressed to his broken nose yet again. Today, eleven months later, he had tasted his own blood once more thanks to the very same man who had made him bleed that first time. The only difference is that this time there would be no reconciliation in the locker rooms after training. There would be no cocky yet charming Jean offering up a sincere apology in the form of his body pressed against the cold tiles of the shower wall. This time, Eren would be left to brood about how he had fallen for the same dirty trick that the pretty-faced bastard had used to floor him those months ago.

"Yeah, Yeager," Jean said as he came to stand beside Eren. "Maybe _one day_ you'll learn how to fight properly."

Eren wanted to retaliate; he wanted to spit something back at Jean – preferably something acidic that would desecrate his perfect features. But as Eren Yeager turned his attention to the man looming beside him, he found his concentration stolen by the perfect pair of shaven legs that appeared in his line of sight. He swallowed thickly as he fought the urge to lift his gaze just slightly, knowing exactly what he would see if he were to venture up that path.

Instead of say anything, or dare look any higher, Eren turned away. He focused his attention on the fight happening in the ring, listening to Sensei bark criticism at every single blow being delivered by the two men sparring. They were both older than Eren and significantly more experienced, both having fought in national championships more than once. It seemed surreal that men with such experience could still be shouted at like a novice by Sensei.

"You've got a long way before you can even dream of looking like that," Jean said.

"Shut up, Jean," Eren said, snapping his head to the side to glare at Jean through puffy eyes. He knew he must have looked ridiculous but he could no longer contain the irritation he felt at Jean's mere proximity.

Jean simply huffed a laugh before turning and walking away, giving Eren an unobstructed view of his perfect derriere. Eren sighed and stared for just a moment too long before turning his attention back to the ring, reminding himself that that taut buttocks was possibly the only reason that he'd managed to stomach Jean Kirstein's unpalatable personality for seven months.

After the match in the ring ended, Eren made his way to the bathroom. There was no use in spending another hour at the dojo since he would not be able to fight anymore thanks only to his broken nose. Perhaps getting medical attention would be best done sooner rather than later; maybe Mikasa could break his nose back into position. He winced at the mere thought of her hands near his face with the intention to break something, even though that break was necessary.

Just before entering the bathroom, Eren's eyes lifted to the mural on the wall. It was a hand-painted piece by one of the girls who attended the cardio classes biweekly and the self-defense classes over weekends. She may have had the personality of a mortician but she had a gifted hand – the mural was flawless.

Levi Ackerman looked like he could conquer the world. Despite being only a flirt over five feet tall, he looked bigger than any man should. His muscles were jagged, deeply defined by the dark shadows dancing in the valleys between them as he balanced on one foot, delivering a reverse roundhouse kick that could knock a man unconscious. In fact, that reverse roundhouse kick was the reason for more than one of his world titles; it was rumored that Levi could kick with a force that could rival a horse.

Eren smiled at the picture as if it were Levi in the flesh. Those smoldering eyes were focused on Eren only, looking over a muscular shoulder with such ferocity in them it made Eren want to pin him against a wall and…

"Keep dreaming, Yeager," Jean said as he walked past Eren and into the locker room.

Before Eren could reply, the door had already shut behind Jean. He stared at the worldwide standard image for "men's bathroom" with eyes wide in mortification – had his thoughts been _that_ obvious?

Without thinking of what he would say, as always, Eren charged into the bathroom and marched straight to where Jean was now standing in nothing but underwear. Eren, however, did not even notice Jean's state of undress as he grabbed the taller man and spun him around.

"What do you mean?" Eren asked.

Jean scowled and tilted his head to the side. "What the fuck are you talking about, Yeager?"

"Don't play dumb," Eren said. "What did you mean out there?"

Jean looked genuinely perplexed.

Eren pushed against Jean's chest, the irritation only growing. " _Keep dreaming, Yeager_."

The taller brunette rolled his eyes before grabbing Eren's wrist and easily pulled Eren's hand off his chest. "Did I hit you _that_ hard?" Jean asked. "Like you'll ever be as good as Levi."

For a moment, Eren felt genuine confusion. Then, as the seconds ticked by, he realized that Jean's comment was not about his fan-boy crush but rather about his inability to reach such a fighting standard. It was a relief, but that relief was short-lived; how dare Jean undermine his fighting ability?

"Watch me," Eren said.

"Beat me first, then we'll talk," Jean said, ruffling Eren's hair like a little boy's.

"Don't touch me!" Eren snapped, smacking Jean's arm and stepping away from the taller man.

It was then that Eren realized Jean was all but naked. Try as he may, he could not stop his eyes from dropping and taking in every inch of Jean's chiseled body, from his broad shoulders to his perfect eight pack, to the bulge in his underwear that was definitely understated.

Jean huffed a humorless chuckle. "I never thought I'd hear you say those words."

Eren's eyes immediately snapped up; he could taste his anger on his tongue as he glared at Jean. A pregnant silence filled the locker room, Eren's glare heated and Jean's boasting as each silently challenged the other to back away first. Neither would relent, however, and the seconds ticked on.

In those seconds, Eren noticed something about Jean's face. While Jean was undoubtedly good looking – his clean features gave him a pretty-boy look that would be well suited to the lead singer of a nineties boy-band – there was something slightly disproportionate about his face. Eren stared harder, the heat in his glare quickly dissipating as he concentrated on Jean's features one by one, from those immaculate eyebrows to the lips that he swore gave the best blowjobs a man could ever get.

"What?" Jean eventually hissed, stepping back.

A small part of Eren rejoiced at his victory; Jean backed away first. But with Jean a meter further back and the perspective more clear, Eren couldn't celebrate his victory as the oddity of Jean's face became painfully obvious.

It was _long_.

"Your face looks like a horse's face," Eren said.

As soon as the words left his mouth, Eren's eyes went wide and he pinched his lips shut. He watched as Jean's upper lip twitch and those large hands ball up into fists, and just as a matter of precaution, Eren took two large steps back to put some distance between himself and Jean.

The man looked livid. His face had reddened and his brows were knitted together in a furious scowl, and his entire frame seemed to be trembling from the sheer magnitude of willpower it took to stay rooted in place. Eren had not thought Jean had that much self-control and despite feeling both irritation at and fear for him, Eren had to admit that he was impressed.

"I'm going to fucking tear you apart one day, Yeager," Jean eventually said.

Eren breathed out a sigh of relief as Jean turned away. He might have a big mouth but if there's one thing Eren had learnt, it was to choose his battles wisely. Jean had broken his nose already this evening, picking a fight with the man now would be most unwise. So Eren simply turned and made his way to his own locker. Besides, Sensei would terminate his membership at the dojo if he got into a fight outside the ring.

After gathering his things, Eren left the bathroom and glanced at the mural of his idol one last time before walking out of the dojo. Those eyes were so focused, so determined, yet they held the promise of violence and pain. There was something behind that glare that made it impossible to look away, as if those eyes alone spoke a command to never avert one's gaze.

Perhaps one day Eren would be lucky enough to meet the man who had changed his life without even knowing it. Not in passing; not as Levi trained on the other end of the dojo with the other elite fighters or chatted with the upper management of the dojo, but to actually meet the man face to face and shake hands to make acquaintances. It was not impossible, since he saw the man almost biweekly, but it was improbable. However improbability was significantly better than impossibility.

Eren smiled as he turned away from the mural, promising himself that one day he would have the guts to meet the man behind those smoldering eyes.

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 **Thanks again for reading.**


	3. Chapter 3: Dinner at Smith's

**Disclaimer: I do not own Snk, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

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There were many things Levi could call himself – a professional sportsman, a BDSM dominant, a friend to a few. Some things he would omit, others he would proudly say, and one of the many things he had no shame in calling himself was a 'clean-freak'. He did not take kindly to any sort of filth, whether it was an actual, tangible mess or the knowledge that microscopic organisms of an unclean nature existed in his vicinity.

 _Germs can make you sick, and sickness can kill you_ , he would always say.

Of course his statement did not take into account the fact that most common bacterial and viral infections could easily be treated by modern medicine. He cared nothing for the details; it was the principle that concerned him.

It was for that particular reason – microscopic battlefields that would most certainly be the cause of the athlete's demise – that Levi never ate out. That, and the fact that the idea of mass-produced food compromising the integrity of his body's pristine health was absolutely mortifying.

"Good to see you Levi, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

The tall blonde that greeted Levi was immaculate. Not a single strand of his golden blonde hair was out of place, and his perfectly masculine chin bore not even a hint of stubble. He stood with a proud posture as he looked down at Levi through piercing blue eyes that women could lose themselves in and men would fear meeting, a gentle smile touching his lips. Erwin Smith was truly a man amongst men, a true scholar, and Levi was proud to be able to call Erwin one of his closest friends.

"These dipshits want to celebrate something," Levi said, gesturing to the couple following closely behind him.

"Hi Erwin!" Isabel said, followed shortly by Farlan's calmer, "Hello."

The men shook hands and Erwin briefly embraced Isabel before he turned back to Levi and asked, "What's the occasion?"

"Does it look like I care?" Levi asked.

"Oh, stop being such a sourpuss!" Isabel said. "It's my birthday."

"Happy birthday, Isabel," Erwin said, embracing her yet again. He turned to Levi and asked, "So is this the 'something' you are celebrating?"

"Apparently so," Levi said, eyes serious despite a subtle jesting undertone to his voice.

Farlan smiled at this; he was clearly pleased by Levi's change in tone and that appreciation did not go unnoticed by Levi. In fact, Levi found it endearing how the man wore his heart on his sleeve in such a manner. It showed Levi that Farlan had not been exposed to the cruelties of the world, as would be expected of a man who found true love early.

"How about a bottle of champagne for the table?" Erwin asked. "On me."

"Ooh, I would never say no to free liquor!" Isabel said with a snicker, worming her way out of her husband's arms and promptly attaching herself to Erwin. "So, what champagne are we talking, Mr Smith?"

Farlan only smiled as Erwin lead his wife towards the VIP section of the esteemed steakhouse, following with Levi at his side.

"Thanks for joining us, Levi," Farlan said once they were alone. The serious tone his voice held was a stark contrast to his carefree, somewhat love-struck smile. "You do so much for Isabel, so much for us both…I really can't imagine this day without you in it."

"You're such a sap, you know that?" Levi said.

"One of us has to be," Farlan said, nudging Levi's shoulder.

The two men soon caught up with Isabel, who was engaged in a seemingly enthralling conversation with Erwin if the hand on her chest and the excited glee in her eyes were anything to go by. Levi glanced at Farlan and found the man staring at Isabel with nothing but love and adoration in his eyes. It showed Levi then and there that no matter how Isabel looked at another man, Farlan was secure enough to know that her excitement, love and adoration for other men was nothing more than platonic. He was secure in that she loved him and only him, despite the caliber of man she was speaking to and gazing up at with unadulterated fascination.

It made Levi jealous.

"I'll be right back with your waiter," Erwin said.

Levi nodded in acknowledgement while both Farlan and Isabel thanked Erwin for his graciousness and hospitality. The pair sat side by side across from Levi, scooting their chairs close to one another's and entwining their fingers underneath the table. Levi would have considered it a juvenile display of affection but to see such joy from both of them at such simple contact after having been together for as long as they have, Levi couldn't help but find it terribly endearing.

The trio had barely had time to glance at the wine menu before the waiter appeared beside the table, his entrance so graceful that it seemed as if he had materialized out of thin air. He wore a tailored black tuxedo with a bow-tie around his neck, a waistcoat hugging his lithe physique and enunciating his broad shoulders. The trousers he wore clung to him but were not tight, and as Levi's eyes raked the length of the stranger's body, he knew then and there that those trousers would complement the waiter more if viewed from behind.

"Good evening," the waiter said, and for the first time since his magical appearance, Levi looked up at him.

When his eyes met with the emerald eyes of the waiter, Levi's jaw nearly fell slack. His unconcealed surprise was mirrored by the man in the tuxedo. Green and grey clashed in awed silence as none other than Eren Yeager looked down at Levi, lips quivering slightly as if he were fighting to remember how to speak. At first nothing was said. The brunette didn't move or even breathe as he stared at Levi. His eyes blinked once, then twice, and then five times in rapid succession as he regained his ability to breathe and forced himself to smile.

Eren cleared his throat before saying, "My name is Eren, and I will be your waiter this evening." He turned his attention to the couple then. "Have you decided what you would like to drink or would you like a few more minutes?"

"Eren," Levi said softly, but the waiter's response in turning to Levi told the man that he had not spoken as softly as he thought. Their eyes met briefly before Eren averted his gaze, scowling in what looked like frustration before meeting Levi's eyes one more. Levi subtly raised a brow at this. "A few more minutes, please Eren."

"Of course, sir," Eren said, holding Levi's gaze for a second longer than he should have before smiling politely and walking off.

Levi was right; the view from behind did complement the waiter more.

However, that was not all that was on his mind. He'd only ever seen Eren in the dojo, whether it was training in basic techniques or sparring against other fighters. He'd only ever seen Eren shirtless, sweating, and bleeding aggression as the muscles on his body flexed and coiled under the immense strain it was placed under. Levi had only ever seen Eren in a primal state, a state of unadulterated passion and masculinity. He had never dreamed of seeing the brunette so smartly dressed yet now that he had, he oh wished he could see more.

Eren Yeager not only looked ravishing, but the brunette looked ready to serve. Dressed in that tuxedo and addressing Levi as 'sir' would have given rise to a stirring in the older man's loins had he any less self-control. Fortunately for Levi, he was not a slave to the hormones of a man's youth and could appreciate the smartly-dressed waiter without rousing much suspicion.

Except from Isabel.

"Hmm!" Isabel hummed. "I heard that!"

At first, the man wanted to spit a retort but he quickly bit his tongue; any defensive behavior would only further excite the woman. He opted to remain impassive. "Heard what?"

"The way you whispered his name," she said with a wink. Levi winced. "It was like you wanted to moan it out…hmmm…"

"Your wife has an overactive imagination," Levi said to Farlan.

The blonde raised both his hands before him in surrender. "Don't involve me in this."

"Oh come on, Levi," Isabel nagged. "You want him, don't you?"

Levi glared at Isabel. "Don't be ridiculous."

"I could see it in your eyes…" she continued.

"He's a waiter."

"You want to see him naked!" Isabel whispered dramatically.

"Don't be…" Levi started, before registering what Isabel had said. For a moment he stared at her in utter disbelief and he wasn't sure if it was because of the crude accusation or because said accusation was spot-on. "Are you out of your fucking mind?"

A childish giggle bubbled up in Isabel's throat as Levi gawked at her with uncut mortification on his face; Levi had no doubt that this was the first time Isabel had ever seen him in this much shock. He could only imagine what he must have looked like because he was looking at her as if she were an extra-terrestrial being with two heads and a dozen eyes. In fact, he'd be less perturbed by that sight than by the words coming from her mouth.

"Well," Isabel suddenly said, her laughter ceasing disturbingly quickly. "I can tell you right now that he wants you too. Naked." She winked then for effect.

"What?" Levi did not know if he uttered that in disbelief or if he really wanted an explanation.

Whatever the reason, that single word caught Isabel's attention. As she leaned forward on the table, crossing her fingers with one another and resting her chin on the bridge it created, Farlan sighed and shook his head as if to wish Levi good luck. The ebony-haired man could only wait with bated breath as Isabel prepared what would undoubtedly be a speech that he would be better off not hearing.

"Did you not see the way he looked at you?" Isabel asked.

Hoping to deter the development of the speech in its incipient stage, Levi said, "He looked at me like any decent human being would when talking to someone."

Isabel laughed curtly. "Oh no, honey. He was checking you out like you are a prime piece of real estate."

Levi sighed. "Farlan. Control your wife."

The man laughed and crossed his arms over his chest. "Incidentally, Levi, that is _your_ job, not mine."

Before Levi could even draw a breath to sigh, Isabel continued. "Levi, he wasn't just _looking_ at you. He was counting how many buttons are on your shirt so he would know how long it would take to undo them all."

If Levi said hearing that did not cause him to balk and swallow down a sudden lump in his throat, he would be lying shamelessly. He stared at Isabel for a moment, partly in shock and partly because if those words were true, then he couldn't wait to have Eren's fingers on his shirt. In fact, he was sorely tempted to say that the time it would take Eren to undo the seven buttons on his shirt would be zero – they would likely be ripped clean off in one go.

"I think you hit the nail on the head," Farlan whispered to Isabel before he gave her a high-five.

Just as Levi registered the camaraderie between the couple before him, the young brunette in question walked by the table with a dazzling smile that once again had Levi swallowing a sudden lump in his throat. In the seconds it took Eren to come to a standstill right beside the table, Levi felt his mouth go drier than the driest corner of the Sahara Desert.

"Have you decided what you would like to order, sir?" Eren asked Levi.

Levi had to fight tooth and nail not to bite his lip at the sultry tone in Eren's voice and the waiter's delectable pronunciation of the word 'sir'. He could only begin to imagine what he would do to Eren if that word was uttered under different circumstances.

"I'll have a glass of dry red wine," Levi said, eyes looking directly at Eren's.

"I'll bring you the best dry red house wine," Eren said, smiling dazzling and…did Levi just imagine it or did Eren wink at him before turning to the couple? "And for you ma'am, sir?"

Once both Isabel and Farlan had placed their orders, Eren left the table with a breath-taking smile and not a flirt of the wink Levi had seen moments ago. Perhaps he had just imagined it.

"Levi," Isabel said.

"Yeah?" Levi replied, eyes fixed on the spot where Eren disappeared. For the briefest moment Eren appeared in the small glass windows nestled in the door leading to the private bar area, and Levi might have imagined it, but Eren's eyes met with his and held his gaze for a second before the brunette blushed and turned away. Levi first reckoned it was a trick of the mind but not even he was creative enough to imagine that sweet blush on the young brunette's face; the picture was just too innocent.

"Go for it," Isabel whispered with a smile. "You deserve a little bit of happiness too, Levi."

* * *

 **Thank you for reading ^.^**


	4. Chapter 4: Thoughts

**Thank you so much for the support this story has gotten so far! A big special thanks to the reviewers, you guys are great!**

 **Just a note: the story will begin switching perspectives a little less forth with. Please do enjoy!**

* * *

It should have been just an ordinary shift at Smith's. It should have been a simple night where Eren would earn his bread and milk by waiting on the patrons who wanted to eat the best steak in the city. He never would have imagined he would be placed on VIP service – the waiters would usually be told about serving celebrities in advance so they could look their absolute best. However, Eren received little warning; as he clocked on, his boss informed him that he would be waiting on none other than Levi Ackerman and two personal friends of the man.

While waiting on the rich and famous was nothing out of the ordinary for the top employees at Smith's – the esteemed restaurant attracted both local and international celebrities of varying fields, from sportsmen to musicians – the fact that it was his very own idol was what had Eren constantly needing to remind himself to behave professionally and remain calm. It also didn't help that said idol, Levi, was dressed in form-fitting smart-casual clothing that had Eren imagining all sorts of things he ought not to at work. And the way Levi looked at him when they talked…it had pleasurable chills running the length of Eren's spine with every word.

Needless to say, the experience of being able to interact with his idol – even though it was in a professional manner – was what made Eren's shift extraordinary. What added to this was the incredibly generous tip left by the man; the tip equaled the entirety of the bill and then some. It was enough to pay Eren's expenses for nearly three weeks, if he excluded the fuel his car would use.

Another thing that made his shift noteworthy was what happened after the trio left. Eren bid Levi and his companions farewell, watched them leave and turned back to finish up for the evening. However, he'd barely made it back to the kitchen when the beautiful red-haired woman who had accompanied Levi and the other gentleman came running back into the restaurant, demanding to speak to Eren privately.

At first, Eren's heart leaped up into his throat as he thought of all the possible reasons a client would come hurtling back into the restaurant in such a frantic manner. Although every conceivable scenario was a negative one, Eren quickly consoled himself with the fact that they would not have tipped so generously had they been disgruntled. Another point he considered was the fact that a patron would much rather address the manager than the problematic staff member directly.

With those thoughts in mind, Eren acquiesced to the woman's request for privacy. As soon as they were alone, he smiled politely to encourage the woman to speak, but the question that came from her was the absolute last thing Eren imagined a client would ask.

"Are you gay?"

Eren's heart leaped right back into his throat and started pounding frantically, beating against his very bones and sending nauseating vibrations tearing through his frame. He stared at the woman in horror; never before had his sexuality been so openly confronted and at work nevertheless. He had no idea what to say, in fact, he couldn't even think straight as confusion and anxiety hurtled through him.

Then the woman did something Eren did not expect – she laughed. It was a curt, shrill little laugh but it was laced with genuine amusement. He could only stare at her in confusion as he fought to remember how to breathe.

"God, you are so cute!" she said.

She then launched forward and embraced Eren tightly, surprising the brunette yet again as their bodies collided. And as soon as the embrace started, it ended; Eren suddenly found himself an arm's length away from the woman, her emerald eyes staring up at him with the expectation of a little girl meeting Santa for the very first time. Despite the crippling fear he was feeling, he had to admit that it was terribly endearing.

"I just want to know if you're into the handsome man I brought along tonight," she said with a wink. "And no, not the blonde. That one is mine!" She winked again.

At first, Eren wanted to laugh at her statement but as his mind registered her words, he balked yet again. Did this woman straightforwardly ask him if he was interested in the internationally renowned MMA fighter Levi Ackerman? Of course he was! He wanted to scream it to her, not because he genuinely was, but because what human being attracted to men did not find Levi attractive? The man was an underwear model, for Christ's sake.

"Well, I saw the way you were looking at him," she continued when Eren did not reply. He shifted uncomfortably; he knew for a fact that he had looked at Levi with significantly more interest than what was courteous as mere strangers. "Although…I'm wondering if you saw the way he looked at you." She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively. "Because I did…"

That was unexpected.

"What?" Eren all but cried out.

The woman giggled whimsically. "I guess I have your attention now, don't I?"

This was not happening. Eren looked around to see if there were cameras set up anywhere that were recording the embarrassing admission of his lust for the sportsman that would lead to the outing of his sexuality. There was not a soul in the restaurant save for the last few waiters and waitresses tidying up for closing.

"I'm sorry ma'am, who are you?" Eren asked in a hushed tone.

Leaning forward, she whispered, "I'm Isabel. I'm Levi's best friend." She had a slight slur as she spoke, although Eren would expect no less considering she drank the majority of the two bottles of wine the table ordered. "And I think you should have left your number on the bill."

Of course Eren had thought about that only a dozen times, yet of course he did not do it because it would have been highly unprofessional and quite frankly, desperate.

"Ah, there you are!" a man said, pulling Eren and Isabel out of their moment of secrecy. "I'm so sorry, Eren, but you know…" The man gently took a hold of Isabel and pulled her away from Eren. "Women are a completely different species when they drink wine."

The waiter could only laugh awkwardly at this; women were a completely different species even when free of wine.

"Farlan," the man suddenly said, hand waiting to shake Eren's.

Eren took the man's hand and shook it. "Eren."

"I know," Farlan said with a smile. He snaked an arm around Isabel's waist and pulled her close to him, causing the woman to giggle at the sudden movement. "Thanks for being such a great waiter tonight, Eren. Levi is very happy with the service and he's impossible to impress."

"It's because he lllllikes Eren," Isabel whispered in a less than subtle manner.

Farlan immediately stiffened and laughed curtly before saying, "Well, we have to go. Have a great evening further, Eren!"

Before Eren could return the sentiment, the couple was already hastily making for the exit. Yet as they walked away, Eren heard something that was not meant for his ears, something that Isabel said to Farlan that Eren would never be able to forget he'd heard.

"He's absolutely perfect for Levi, don't you think, babe?"

* * *

 _Ninety-four_ , Eren thought as the dim white light flashed in the darkness. He stared up at the ceiling, waiting, and after a few seconds, that same little light flashed dimly yet again. _Ninety-five._ His eyes were fixed on a spot on the ceiling, nothing tangible or even noticeable but simply an imaginary spot that had kept his interest for what felt like hours. When the little light flashed yet again, Eren mouthed, _ninety-six_. So he went on until the white light eventually flashed for the one hundredth time.

Only then did Eren bother even wondering who it was that had messaged him at this ungodly hour. The last he'd checked the time it was already passed two in the morning, and that felt like it was hours ago. Anybody who messaged him now was either in grave danger or exceptionally bored and incapable of conquering their insomnia, much like himself at present. And if it were the former, a frantic phone call would have undoubtedly followed the message.

All in all, Eren had reason to believe that his response was not required. After all, it was only one message that had come through; whoever was texting him was probably only asking if he was still awake.

 _Wide awake_ , he thought, sighing. Wide awake all because of a single sentence he'd heard, a sentence that was never meant for his ears.

 _He's absolutely perfect for Levi_.

His mind could, and did, give a dozen meanings to that phrase that either did not have Eren as the subject or a relationship of any sort as the undertone. Yet for every reason he came up with that proved that sentence had nothing to do with him, his mind countered with what Isabel had said to him when they spoke alone.

 _I'm wondering if you saw the way he looked at you._

Had he not imagined it all night? Levi had some sort of overbearing interest in Eren, making an effort to meet his eyes every time they spoke but that was simply being polite, was it not? Even though the man's eyes had a plethora of promise behind them, was that not just how Levi Ackerman looked?

What was Isabel hinting at? Eren rolled his eyes; it was painfully obvious. There would only be one reason a person's best friend would ask if someone was interested in their friend; the friend was interested in the person. In this case, Levi was interested in Eren. It was the only logical explanation for what had transpired and for what was said.

Logical, but too good to be true.

"Fuck it," Eren whispered. He was getting his hopes up and he knew it. He had to stop; it was dangerous.

For the first time in a long time, Eren wished he was straight. Things would be exponentially simpler then – if he were to be interested in someone, it would only be a matter of whether or not she liked him back and whether or not they were compatible. Yet because he liked men, when he found himself interested in a man, he first had to find out if that man was even interested in other men before the matter of compatibility even came up.

Then there was the matter of how he would secure that information. Of course it was not as simple as subtle flirtation to test a man's response to him – that could get him killed. Homophobia was rife in the world, and even hinting at being gay to some men warranted severe violence or even murder.

Eren sighed as he felt the prickling of frustrated tears poke at his eyes. He wished he could be normal. He wished he could live life and find love without fear. What were the chances that the world-famous Levi Ackerman would be gay, anyway? Isabel was drunk and what he'd heard was probably taken horribly out of context. Levi was not gay. Eren did not stand the whisper of a chance with the man.

In fact, Eren reckoned Levi was probably one of the violently homophobic types.

Groaning, Eren reached out for his phone. He did not want to spend any more time thinking about the morbid topic of his sexuality. It had brought enough pain to his adolescent years; he would be damned if he relived that curse again as an adult.

When he unlocked his phone, he was not surprised to see that the message was from his best friend. After all, Armin was always awake until ungodly hours in the week because of his studies and spent his weekend chasing sunrises because of his profound passion for online gaming. No one knew when the blonde slept, but he was always performing at optimum capacity despite seemingly _always_ being online. His mental stamina was nothing short of impressive.

 _ **Armin (03:17):**_ _Hey Eren! Are you still awake? I'm about to rock some CS. If you're around let me know if you want to play._

Looking at the current time, 03:42, Eren quickly concluded that the invitation had expired. Armin was probably already playing and had likely forgotten about having asked Eren to join at all. Ordinarily this may irk the brunette but this particular morning, he was glad he'd dodged the bullet. With his mind as plagued as it been for the last few hours, he doubted his performance would be any better than that of a wet-eared noob.

 _ **Eren (03:42):**_ _Sorry dude, next time. Not really up for gaming right now. I'm about to hit the hay._

Assuming Armin was already enjoying a game, Eren locked his phone and placed it on his bedside table once more. He turned over, back towards the phone, and closed his eyes. Even though his mind was still bothered by the events of the evening, he knew he had to sleep. If he did not sleep soon he would most likely not fall asleep at all, and he would not have the chance to make up for the lost sleep for a whole week.

The mooing of a cow broke the silence of the night and Eren rolled his eyes. To this day he could not say why he had selected a cow's moo as his message alert but try as he may, he could not find it in his heart to change it.

 _ **Armin (03:44):**_ _Thinking about ways to blow that huge tip? Shout if you need help. I'm a pro at spending money._

Eren smiled; he didn't need to be told twice. He'd made the mistake of taking Armin along to the mall one day when he'd gotten a particularly large tip, and needless to say, money that he thought would last eight days only ended up lasting two hours.

 _ **Eren (03:45):**_ _No need, I've got that covered. Night dude, chat tomorrow._

 _ **Armin (03:45):**_ _Haha sweet. Chat later. Ciao!_

Once again, Eren set his phone down and turned away. This time, however, he felt a little bit better; just hearing Armin's cheerful voice in his mind, even if it was only for a few minutes, had lifted his spirits considerably. He closed his eyes with a smile touching his lips, and dozed off with a mind clear of the worries of the heart.

* * *

 **Thank you for reading. Thoughts and comments are always welcome!**

 **OS**


	5. Chapter 5: Sunday

**A thousand thank you's to the amazing support for this story! The followers, those who favorited the story...it makes my heart beat custard to know you are keen for more. And those who review: a SPECIAL THANK YOU to every single reviewer! To know what my readers think of my story is a great privilege, and waking up to emails of reviews really brightens up the day! You are truly the best!**

 **The story will now follow Levi's POV more, so there will be less switching between chapters. The same warnings as in the first chapter still stand but I would just like to reiterate that I will not mention triggers before every chapter so please, if BDSM and adult themed stories are not your thing, you won't enjoy this. Also, I've forewarned of many different pairings, not always in a romantic sense, so please be mindful of that.**

 **Enough rambling. Enjoy!**

* * *

Levi could not remember the last time he'd had a dirty dream. Not a dream containing some innuendo or a moderately sexual theme stemming from illicit thoughts he'd had, but an outright _filthy_ sex dream. A dream about another man – a very specific young brunette, in fact – bound, gagged and suspended by an intricate rope rig of Levi's very own design. An explicit dream of that man being swung back and forth on the rig as Levi thrust into him, spanking his taut, tanned ass with an open hand as the brunette moaned and whimpered around the ring gag.

 _Scream for me_ , Levi demanded, thrusting ever harder into the bound brunette. Of course said brunette acquiesced, his moans turning to screams as Levi's thrusting became pounding and his spanking became bruising.

Needless to say, Levi woke that Sunday morning painfully aroused. The urge to be touched was consuming his body as wholly as the lusting for Eren was consuming his mind, and all thanks to a tailored black tuxedo and the brunette's delectable usage of the word 'sir'. All because of those fierce emerald eyes looking down at him, filled with expectation. This juvenile lust had the man irritated despite the early hour; how could he react so strongly to such mundane things? Clothes, gazes and words…was he not used to being called 'sir'?

 _Not by Eren._

In the end, it was too much to bear. Having been denied intimacy for far too long, Levi was unable to will away his need. He could simply not ignore the fact that he had been reduced to nothing more than a horny man. And when his hand eventually found and wrapped around his rigid length, it was electrifying. The jolt that tore through his body at first contact spurred him on and he was quick to find a rhythm that saw him to completion in record time.

He hadn't cum that quickly since he was a fourteen year old virgin.

The satisfaction sobered his mind. Once free of the binds of lust, Levi stripped himself of all the evidence of what had transpired, throwing his pajamas and bedding into the washing machine and setting it to wash on its longest cycle. He then jumped into the shower, the water blisteringly hot as it rained down on him, and he scrubbed himself over and over again as if his perversions were crawling under his skin and had to be cleansed.

After the long, scalding shower, Levi felt human once more. His muscles were relaxed, his mind was clear, and he'd be damned but he had to admit that a self-induced orgasm before coffee was not such a terrible thing. He may have felt juvenile for it but there was no denying that he was a man, and a man had needs.

As Levi sipped on his coffee, the sobriety of a clear mind once again began to elude him. It all started with a single thought: last night was pleasant. The pleasantness of the night was exacerbated by the excellent service produced by the waiter, a waiter who was more than easy on the eyes.

Eren Yeager. That was where Levi's sobriety turned to entropy.

Levi wondered what Eren did after his shift last night. Did he go home or go out? It was a Saturday night and Eren was young, after all. He was probably still asleep. What time would he wake? Would he be hung over, and if so, would he want to eat something salty, something greasy, or rather nothing at all? What foods did Eren like? Was he allergic to anything?

"Fuck!" Levi said, slamming his palm on the granite countertop. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, forcing his mind to clear itself of the incessant questions about the brunette, questions that he had absolutely no right or reason to be asking.

When he opened his eyes again, his mind was mostly clear. Clear enough to cease its obsessive thoughts but not clear enough to be relieved of the subject of his psychological turmoil. It seemed impossible to purge his mind of all that was Eren Yeager.

"I need to do something," Levi said to himself. Something, anything to keep him sufficiently occupied so that his mind would not have time to wander. But what, pray tell? Not only was Sunday his committed rest-day, but with the healing shoulder injury, that rest-day had become holy.

He spent a few minutes pondering what he could do to distract himself. The first thing that came to mind was to practice something with regards to BDSM. However, thanks to the injury, activities such as flogging, caning and whipping were definitely off the cards. Perhaps he could do a stock take of his collection of toys and tools…Levi promptly dismissed that idea. Everything was immaculately stored and for items out of sight, the boxes containing them were clearly marked. From the smallest butt-plug to the thickest rope, Levi knew where everything was.

Rope.

A light smile touched the very corners of Levi's mouth as the possibility occurred to him; he could practice his rigging. Ropes promised to give not only a sufficient distraction, but also guaranteed hours of entertainment. It was the perfect escape.

Levi loved ropes. The versatility a single length of rope could provide not only made for endless fun but also challenged his creativity. It forced him to search for new ways to use that single tool, to explore new ties and redesign old ones. That single length of rope could tie a limb, gag a mouth or even create an entire corset. A single length of rope had the potential to incite feelings of humiliation, fear and even pain just as easily as it could arouse feelings of sensuality, intimacy and security. A person bound by ropes could be presented as a living, breathing work of art just as they could be made to be a symbol of degradation and crude ownership.

The possibilities were endless.

Unfortunately, neither one of Levi's subs were interested in ropes the way he was. Both women enjoyed simple binds and even gags fashioned from rope, but it never went further than that. Because of that, Levi's use of ropes lessened over the years. Now he was left to practice his ties on a lifeless mannequin, only enjoying a living human at the rarest of times. It left the experienced rigger out of practice; it left the rope-loving heart barren.

Taking a length of crimson rope in his hands, Levi pinched the ends together and let the rest fall to the floor and pool at his feet. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, focusing his attention on his tactile sense, arousing every nerve in his fingertips and palms. He ran the crimson length along his palms, fondling the taut strands of rope with his sensitive fingertips, noting every twist in the rope that held it together. As the rope passed through his hands, he wound it loosely over his shoulder so that the inspected length would not touch the floor. And so he continued, searching every inch of the rope for imperfections or hazards and quietly taking his time to locate anything that could potentially bring his submissive to harm.

Even if is submissive today was merely a lifeless mannequin, Levi would exercise the same caution as he would with a living human being. After all, to be safe in play one had to be safe in practice.

Once satisfied that the rope was safe for use, Levi ran the rope through his fingers one last time in search of bight, the middle of the length of rope. He found it quickly and held it firmly as he looped the rope over the mannequin's head, placing the bight between its shoulder blades. He flinched internally as the dull thud of the rope tapping against the mannequin's body reminded him that what stood before him was only a lifeless doll.

Oh, what he would give to trade the glossy black plastic for the smooth, tanned skin of Eren Yeager. How happy he would be if he could feel the warmth of the man's skin grazing his knuckles instead of the cold plastic. It would be simply glorious to enjoy the submission of that man rather than the non-negotiable compliance of an inanimate object.

Levi sighed, cursing the rigid, lifeless mass before him. He hated the longing he felt; he hated how vulnerable he felt, how _human_ he felt.

Clenching his jaw, Levi forced himself to focus on the task at hand. His fingers worked deftly, tying knots along the length of the rope and aligning strands with one another to place them perfectly parallel. He wove the rope in and around itself, forming perfect diamonds through which the glossy black of the mannequin's skin could be seen. Across its torso and down its sides, the mannequin became enveloped in the crimson web. Minutes ticked on and Levi's dexterous fingers worked without pausing, creating what he had seen in his mind. He walked back and forth around the mannequin, bending and squatting and even reaching up onto the very tips of his toes to ensure that every strand was no less than perfect.

Eventually his hands stilled. He splayed his fingers out and placed his palms on the chest of the mannequin, the chest now bearing two perfect diamonds that rested right underneath the palms of Levi's hands. He closed his eyes and took in the wondrous feel of the rope. And as he stood like that, he wished with all he had in him that he could be feeling the rise and fall of a chest beneath the ropes. He wished he could feel the warmth of a man's skin seeping through the miniscule spaces between the ropes. He wished, but the reality was that there was no movement, there was no warmth. There was only cold, lifeless plastic beneath the rope.

"Alright," he whispered, letting out a long breath.

Levi took a step back then to analyze his work. When his eyes rested upon what he had created, they widened in awe. The breath still left in his lungs left in a rush and his mouth upturned into an elated smile.

"Perfect," he said. He reached out to touch the rope as if to confirm its tangibility, its existence. "Absolutely perfect."

What stood before Levi was a crimson corset fashioned for a male body. It would undoubtedly be a snug fit designed to make the wearer feel beautiful and secure, owned and cherished. Enough skin would be covered as to not reveal too much to undeserving eyes but enough would be left bare to keep others wanting. It was the perfect male corset and it was beautifully presented on the mannequin; the contrast between crimson and black was absolutely breath taking. Levi could only begin to imagine how sinfully delectable it would be if the deep ebony was replaced by a bronzed tan.

Eren truly would look ravishing in this tie. It would put the tuxedo he wore the previous night to shame. In fact, if Eren were Levi's, he would be made to wear this corset and absolutely nothing else (besides a collar, of course) whenever it was playtime.

Just as Levi's mind was about to elaborate on that fantasy, his phone rang. Ordinarily, he would curse at whoever dared call him on a Sunday, as if everyone in his life was somehow expected to know that it was his day to play recluse. However, the ringtone pacified him before he had the time to get worked up; it was the ringtone assigned to a very special woman in his life.

"Petra," Levi said, sounding relieved. He had every right to be; he had not heard from Petra in more than two months.

"Hi Levi," Petra said. As formal as ever. "I hope I'm not disturbing you."

Levi glanced at the mannequin. Had she called ten minutes earlier, he would have definitely been disturbed. In fact, on an ordinary Sunday he would have told her she'd disturbed him regardless of what he was doing. But today the man was so pleased with what he had created that it left no room for modification, only admiration. He could not be disturbed.

"Not at all," he said. "What can I do for you?"

"Straight to business, as always," Petra said, a smile in her tone. "You wouldn't say we've been friends for the better half of a decade."

Levi chuckled. "That's rich coming from the woman who has been missing in action for nearly three months. Where have you been?"

"Oh, you know. Just out and about."

"You called me to tell me you've been out and about?"

Petra sighed. "Of course not, Levi. I actually have some good news, for a change."

Good news. It seemed like a foreign concept. Petra had never had it easy. Levi remembered how he had to protect her from the wrong types of men; emotionally unstable, abusive and possessive men who would not bat an eye if she had died at their hands. It was this protectiveness that brought Levi and Petra close, so close in fact that he had once thought he loved her. She had thought she loved him too. In the end, Petra's gender was bothersome to Levi and Petra realized that she could not imagine a life with someone as pedantic as Levi, and the two opted to remain friends.

And then it turned out Petra had submissive and masochistic streaks in her and Levi, quite jokingly, offered to give her a spanking she would never forget. She took up his offer, much to his shock, and when the deed was done the two found they had an incredible dynamic with her bent over with her bare bottom being abused by Levi.

It was indeed a spanking she had not forgotten.

"What's the news?" Levi asked.

"I met a man," she said.

"Oh?"

"He's a bit older that you," she said, sounding bashful. "He's quite nice and guess what? He's in the scene!"

The scene. The BDSM scene. The kink community. Call it what you will; people who were active in that lifestyle knew exactly what 'the scene' meant.

"Where did you meet him?" Levi asked.

"Don't judge me," she said, "but I met him online." Levi was busy opening his mouth to reprimand her when she hastily continued. "We've been talking for about a year now and have already met half a year ago."

Levi scowled. "And I'm only hearing of this now?"

"Well…" Petra said and then sighed. "I saw potential in him from the get go but I didn't want to get my hopes up." Levi smiled; all his warnings and speeches over the years had finally paid off. "But he really is a nice guy. I don't think you'd get along with him, though. He's kind of similar to you."

"Can't have the original so you go for the straight replica, huh?" Levi said, making Petra laugh. "Is he hot?"

"He's not your type."

"That's a no."

Petra snorted, still laughing. It made the man smile. He had always found her snorting strange yet somehow endearing despite how disgusting it was.

"I'm happy for you, Petra. Just be careful."

Her answer was quick. "I am!" She sighed. "Although…I would like to start playing with him…"

Levi froze. A profound feeling of dread pooled in his stomach and the very gravity of the earth seemed to compound as that dread weight him down. His heartbeat slowed, the organ beating sluggishly as if the blood in his veins had turned to lead. Even his lungs ceased their function, seemingly freezing mid-breath and starving his body of much-needed oxygen. Levi could feel his fingertips and lips begin to tingle. This was fear; unadulterated fear.

"Would you like to terminate our relationship?" Levi asked, cringing at how weak and desperate he sounded.

"No," Petra said. Her voice was soft and remorseful. "But…if I pursue a relationship with him, you and I…"

Levi pinched his eyes shut. He had always known the day would come when Petra found a man she would rather play with than Levi. After all, Levi could not give her the very many sexual elements of kink that she desired. He could not grab her hair and roughly fuck her _while_ spanking her with a hard wooden paddle. It was inevitable that she would find a man that would bridge that gap and consequently replace Levi.

But knowing that it was inevitable didn't make it any easier to stomach. They had been playing together for a long time, and even though neither was exclusive to the other, the thought of losing Petra entirely as a submissive was painful to bear.

Levi cleared his throat, steeling himself. "I understand."

"Levi…"

"It's fine, Petra." He sighed. "It was bound to happen."

"I know." Petra drew a deep, shaky breath. "It's not…it's not going to happen right away so I am still your sub, Levi. I just need you to know where it might go."

"Of course. Thank you for telling me."

"Hey…" Petra paused. "If it's not too much to ask…could you teach him…a few things?"

A sad smile touched Levi's lips. To the vanilla world it would be an alien request, perhaps even a slap in the face. But to Levi, Petra asking him to teach her potential new Dominant what he knew was the greatest honor; it meant that what he had done with her was exactly what she wanted and she wanted another man to grow on that foundation.

"I'd be more than happy to, Petra."

"You're really the best, Levi," she said. "A great friend and an amazing Dominant. He really had large shoes to fill."

"Petra, I will not accept the return of your collar unless I know for certain that the Dominant you are leaving me for is absolutely capable of satisfying your emotional, physical and sexual needs as a submissive. I will not watch you walk away for less."

Petra sighed. It was not an exasperated sigh. It was one filled with appreciation and relief. "Thank you."

"It is only my greatest pleasure," Levi said. "You may be my submissive, Petra, but above all else you are my friend. I want you to be happy. Even if it's with an ugly man who will spend the rest of his relationship with you trying to be me."

A jovial flutter of giggles bubbled up through the receiver, making Levi smile. Petra's voice was dripping with sarcasm as she said, "No one will ever be as great as you, Levi."

That phone call had changed Levi's mood drastically. The elation he felt at perfecting the male corset had been trumped by the profound sadness of losing a submissive. Although she said it was not yet to pass, it was inevitable. Although through the sadness Levi felt genuine joy; Petra deserved happiness, and for her to want to commit herself to a man in that way meant that she had truly found something special.

For that, Levi would happily accept the return of her collar.

Who knows…perhaps he would be lucky enough to find his own something special.

* * *

 **Thank you for reading.**

 **OS**


	6. Chapter 6: The Foundation

**Just a quick shout out to everyone reading this story. Thanks for all the support, especially the reviewers (you know who you are, you sexy beasts). Your follows, favorites and mostly the reviews are the lifeblood of the story.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Snk, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

That Sunday night, Levi's dreams turned to nightmares. Pleasant memories and optimistic desires darkened as feelings of neglect, loneliness and sorrow swarmed his subconscious mind. Levi tossed and turned about most of the night, not quite asleep but not awake either; he was conscious of every sound and movement around him yet he had no control over his perceptions. The more he tried to sleep, the more awake he seemed. Yet when he tried to wake, fatigue all but drowned him.

Levi woke the following morning feeling like he had stayed up all night. In fact, he felt like he had a hangover; his body ached, his head was pounding and his eyes refused to stay open no matter how vehemently he willed his lids to stay peeled back. It was a ghastly feeling. He felt ill, and what made it worse was that despite how fatigued his mind was, it continued to entertain the incessant thoughts of abandonment.

Petra would be leaving him soon. So what? She was never really his to begin with; she was his submissive, someone who used him to entertain her darker desires. She was his to use as well, his to use to indulge in the sadism that the men he slept with would never allow. For all intents and purposes, their relationship was a professional one – there were no sexual elements to it (he was gay, after all), and they rarely ever saw each other more than twice a month. They were nothing more than each other's toys…toys that cared for each other, nurtured one another, respected and strengthened each other, laughed together and had years of friendship and good memories together.

Sighing, Levi finally sat upright. Who was he trying to fool? What he and Petra had was special. He had dedicated years of his life to her as she had to him, and try as he may, he could not deny the fact that he was hurt by the fact that she wanted to leave him. Of course he was elated that she had found someone who could give her what he had given her and more, but that didn't make the pill any easier to swallow. He cared deeply about Petra, and the bond they had developed through the years of their tango of sadism and masochism was etched in his heart.

Even though it was not even a remotely conventional relationship, she was his, and her saying she no longer wanted to be his hurt him.

* * *

Monday crawled by at a glacial pace. The exhaustion Levi suffered thanks to his inability to sleep soundly the previous night had him in a state of near catatonia. Even menial tasks became difficult as Levi trudged through the day; getting out of bed, drinking coffee, and even showering seemed like gargantuan tasks. Yet despite his body's inability to function, his mind fired at twice its usual speed, entertaining damning thoughts of loss and loneliness.

At first, his thoughts were about Petra – the memories he shared with her, the good times they'd had as friends, the wonderful plays they'd had in the years she had been his submissive, and ultimately all he would lose when she walked away. The void she would leave would be abyssal. It had Levi wishing, for the first time in years, that he had someone he could truly call his own.

If only he could have what Petra had found.

That was where his thoughts turned horribly sour. When he found himself wishing he could find what she had found, he faced a grim reminder: what he wanted did not exist. Men who were willing to fully submit to him and truly enjoy the expansive sadism he had to offer were not only few and far between, but seemed to be extinct. It was hard enough finding straight men with those sorts of desires, but to find a gay man with a genuine appreciation for BDSM and submitting…that seemed impossible.

By the end of the day, Levi felt somewhat depressed. His incessant negativity had brought him to a point of self-loathing, and for the first time in years he wondered if he wouldn't be better off if he omitted BDSM from his lifestyle entirely.

That thought was toxic. BDSM was as much a part of he who was as the very skin on his body. Not because he had a need to dominate, not because he thrived on releasing his sadistic tendencies, but because of the deep psychology behind it all. Because the relationship between a Dominant and a submissive was so deeply psychological that it could be had without bodies if that were physically possible. And that was what Levi wanted. What he _needed_. He was a psychological person, and while physical intimacy was and always would be wonderful, it was psychological intimacy that ultimately satisfied him.

Levi eventually re-centered himself after a particularly brutal cardiovascular fitness training session. Pushing his body to the limits it could handle given his injury, Levi was finally able to purge his mind of the negativity that had consumed him all day. He focused on his physicality; his mind was locked on his breathing, his balance, his technique, and as the minutes ticked on, so the emptiness consumed his mind.

It was heavenly.

By the time he was walking to his car, Levi felt revitalized. Exhausted, but pure of mind. All he wanted to do now was get home, shower and grant his body the sleep it so desperately craved.

As Levi walked, pleased with his new peace of mind, he heard some shuffling about echoing off the walls of the desolate underground parking lot. It was not unexpected since the dojo's training session had just adjourned, but the safety-conscious man kept his ears to the ground and eyes peeled as he made his way to his vehicle.

"…so fucking much…"

The voice that broke the silence shattered it. It was nothing but a pained, desperate whisper, but it seemed to be a hundred decibels in that moment. It caught Levi's attention, but the man did not stop; he walked on, only five cars away from his own now. He had no interest in involving himself in another person's business.

"I know, Eren. I miss you too."

 _Eren?_

The utterance of that name brought Levi to a halt. He whipped his head in the direction of the voice, his brows furrowing as he was met with darkness. It seemed unlikely that a person would skulk about in such deep darkness in such a desolate location at night – he glanced at his wristwatch and his frown deepened as he noted it read 21:37 – but he was quite certain he'd heard the voice come from that direction. He peered into the unlit area of the parking lot, pondering the pros and cons of making a move.

Of course going there was dangerous. Anyone wandering about such dark parts at night was either asking for trouble or causing it. But on the other hand, he'd heard _that_ name – what were the odds that there was another Eren in this area?

 _But he wasn't even at training_ , Levi reminded himself. It was more than likely a completely different person and nothing more than a coincidence. With this in mind, he shook his head and continued on towards his car.

"Do you really?"

That voice had Levi halting once again. There was no mistaking it; that was Eren's voice. After hearing that sweet voice utter the word 'sir' a dozen times in one night, Levi swore he would never forget that unique tone of Eren Yeager's voice.

 _But…_ Levi stared into the darkness, perplexed; why would Eren Yeager be _there_? It was unsafe by all accounts. What could possibly lure that brunette into such a dangerous situation?

"Yes." The second voice was that of a man. Levi did not recognize it. "Every part of me misses you."

 _What?_

Try as he may, the phrase could be ignored. It was ambiguous at best and Levi would be damned but it piqued his interest. He sneaked towards the darkness, fists at the ready, in search of Eren and the other man. And once he was in the darkness and his eyes had adjusted, he was met with a sight that had him questioning his perception.

Leaning against the hood of an electric blue sedan was a man that Levi, despite the poor light, instantly recognized as Jean Kirstein. Kirstein was one of the dojo's up and coming young fighters, a talented athlete with one hell of an attitude. From what he had seen in the last few months, Eren and Kirstein did not get along. Yet there Eren was, standing but a breath away from Kirstein with a hand on the arrogant fighter's hip. And if that was not shocking enough, Kirstein had Eren's other wrist in his hand and was guiding it along his torso towards his…

"What the fuck?" Levi mouthed as Eren's hand found its target.

Levi's eyes widened and his mouth fell agape as he watched Eren firmly grab onto what was, until now, a very well-concealed erection in Jean's trousers. At first, he thought he was mistaken in what he was seeing but there was no mistaking it; Eren's appreciative hum and firm groping of the hardened length made the truth that much more obvious.

 _Is Eren…_

"You really do miss me," Eren said teasingly.

"You have no idea," Jean replied.

At this point, Levi was not sure if he was frozen in place due to fascination or awe. Either way, whatever he was feeling quickly turned to absolute mortification as he watched Eren drop to his knees in front of Kirstein. Levi watched, rooted in pace as Eren slowly, almost playfully, pulled at the waistband of Kirstein's neon yellow gym shorts, lowering them just enough to free Kirtein's erect cock.

"This is not happening…" Levi said to himself.

Eren roughly grabbed at the rigid flesh pointing right at him and said, "I've missed this." There was a raw, lustful edge to his voice. "I've missed your cock."

 _Eren is gay_ , Levi thought. _Gay._

"My cock misses your mouth," Jean said. He then threaded his fingers through Eren's tousled locks and unceremoniously brought Eren's mouth to his cock.

"This is _not_ happening," Levi said again.

Only, it was. Right there in front of him, only a few meters away, Jean Kirstein had his head back and eyes shut in unconcealed pleasure. Eren Yeager, the object of Levi's lusting – a man Levi had not even imagined could have any interest in other men – was on his knees and taking in every inch of the well-endowed junior fighter as if a gag reflex was a forgotten nineties fad.

It was repulsive. It was erotic. It was exciting and arousing and disgusting and shocking. Levi did not know how to feel about what he was witnessing, he did not know what to think Yet despite his confusion and his feelings of revulsion, he could not bring himself to look away. His eyes were locked on the crude sight of Eren's lips around Jean's circumcised cock. His ears were keen on the soft slurping sounds echoing in the parking lot. His body was rooted in place and his own member had begun to harden in his trousers as he watched from the shadows, reduced to nothing more than a perverted voyeur.

Within minutes Kirstein's moaning grew louder and lewder. His deep breaths became ever shallower until they were nothing more than desperate pants. His hands were white-knuckled as they gripped at Eren's messy locks, guiding Eren along his length at a brutal pace until his body began to shudder and jerk. A cussing chant to the heavens shattered the calm of the night as Kirstein reached completion, his essence eagerly taken in by Eren.

As vile as it was, it was absolutely glorious to watch. Levi bit his lip as he imagined himself in Kirstein's position, being pleased so eagerly by the gorgeous brunette. He imagined how soft Eren's lips would feel on his cock, how warm and soft that tongue would be as it traced along the veins of his length.

"Fuck, Levi," he said to himself, palming at his cock as it strained against the confines of his underwear and trousers. A part of him was disgusted by his juvenile reaction to what he'd seen and completely mortified by the fact that he had actually stayed to watch, but the larger part of him – the part controlled by the all-powerful, governing testosterone – could not care any less.

"…go home and so do you."

That was Kirstein's voice. The tone was abrasive, so much so that it tore Levi from his thoughts. He turned his attention to the duo once more and was somewhat surprised to find Jean rushing towards the driver's side of the vehicle, completely oblivious to Eren toddling along behind him.

"But it's Valentine's Day," Eren said. He sounded confused and dare Levi say, desperate. "I thought we could…you know…"

"I don't give a shit about Valentine's Day and you know it," Jean snapped. He turned to Eren then, running his condescending eyes along Eren's form. "Besides, you're drunk. I don't wanna go anywhere with you."

"Asshole," Levi hissed under his breath.

"Oh?" Eren growled. "You won't go anywhere with me because I'm 'drunk' but you're perfectly okay with letting me suck your dick?"

Jean opened the car's door and glanced at Eren with a smirk. "What guy would say no to a blowjob?"

Levi's jaw fell slack for the second time that night. He could not believe the audacity of Jean Kirstein. He was speechless to the magnitude of disrespect Kirstein was showing Eren, awed by the inhumanity of the way he was treating the brunette.

"So that was your plan all along, huh?" Eren said. "To use me to get off and be on your merry way?"

The humorless laugh that burst from Jean's mouth was jagged. "Oh please. You were the little slut who cornered me and happily dropped to your knees to suck my dick."

If Levi's jaw could have fallen even further, it would have. He shook his head, the very breath knocked from his lungs. "Wow…"

"What the fuck is your problem?" Eren yelled.

"Keep your voice down, Eren," Jean cautioned.

"Don't you dare fucking tell me what to do!" Eren snapped with an angry finger pointing at Kirstein. "Why the fuck would you call me that? Do you get off on calling me a slut? Do you get off on the idea of getting blown by a slut in a parking lot?"

Jean sighed. "Eren. Go home. I don't have time for this shit."

All Eren's anger dissipated in the single long breath that left his lungs. He folded his arms across his chest and shook his head, stepping away from the vehicle as if its very proximity was offensive. Levi wouldn't be surprised if that was exactly what Eren was feeling.

"I can't believe I fell for your shit again," Eren whispered.

"Whose fault is that?" Jean asked before slipping into the car.

The engine started, the headlights turned on, and within seconds, all that remained of the sedan was the memory of the hum of its engine. A pregnant silence remained in its wake, and Levi watched with bated breath as Eren's arms slowly unfolded. Eren stood as still as a statue for a few seconds, his eyes unseeing as they stared dead ahead.

And then he snapped.

Anger erupted from within Eren. Absolute white-hot rage tore from the brunette's very core, vocalized by an animalistic roar and personified by the raging swinging of his fists as the pillar beside Eren became a punching bag. Levi watched in horror as Eren's fists connected with the concrete, blow by blow echoing through the parking lot as bone-crunching cracks harmonized with the profanities cried out by the brunette.

It looked like Eren was not going to stop. The pillar had blood dripping down its length and still the brunette relented. If Eren were to keep this up, he would undoubtedly break every bone in both his hands; Levi had to intervene.

Just as the man sprung up from the shadows, Eren stopped. Levi stopped too; he thought Eren had spotted him. He stayed still, holding his breath and racking his mind for excuses as to why he was here and what he would possibly say to Eren. Walking in on someone beating a concrete pillar was hardly grounds for a casual conversation. Yet the longer Levi waited, the more obvious it became that Eren had not suddenly stopped because of spotting him; Eren had stopped because his rage had run dry.

Eren closed his eyes and leaned against the pillar, resting his forehead just above the bloody spot he'd created. He released a long breath. At first, it seemed like a sigh of relief. But as the seconds ticked on, Eren's breaths became shallower and shakier, and his eyelids drew closed until they were pinched tightly shut. It wasn't until a choking gasp echoed off the parking lot walls that Levi realized what was happening – Eren was crying.

It broke Levi's heart. Many called Levi cold and ruthless but the truth was that he was just a man who had been disappointed one too many times. His experiences had left him with a hard shell and high walls, but even those walls had peepholes in them. And right now, Eren was aligned with one of these peepholes. Right now, Levi wanted nothing more than to console the brunette; no one deserved to be treated as harshly as Eren had.

"Eren?" Levi called.

Eren did not react.

"Are you okay, brat?" Levi asked.

The brunette stopped crying so suddenly it was as if a switch had been flipped. He was quick to wipe the tears from his face, and when he turned his attention to Levi, it was as if he had not shed a single tear. The only thing that gave him away was the slight redness in his eyes.

"L-Levi?" Eren asked as his eyes met with Levi's. He blinked as if he were seeing an aberration.

Levi shrugged. "That is my name." Oh and he liked how Eren said it. Fuck the inappropriate timing of that inappropriate thought. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" Eren asked, smiling. It seemed genuine, but the sadness behind that smile was painfully obvious to Levi. "What are you doing here?"

Levi did not want to beat around the bush. While he did not expect Eren to open up to him on a whim, he found himself somewhat irked by Eren's poor attempt at concealing the truth. He wanted Eren to be honest, and to force the brunette's hand, Levi laid bare his own truth.

"I saw what happened with Kirstein," Levi said.

The brunette tensed and eyed Levi carefully, searching for signs of a bluff. "What did you see?"

For a moment, Levi considered lying. He considered saying that he'd only seen what looked like an argument, even if only to spare Eren's dignity. But before he could even utter a single word, he remembered that what he had seen brought to light a very important fact about Eren Yeager, the man he desired – Eren was sexually attracted to men. That alone changed everything; Eren was now no longer completely unattainable.

Levi drew a deep breath. Something inside was telling him that his next words would determine the course of his relationship with Eren Yeager.

"I saw everything."

* * *

 **You all know what to do ^^,**

 **OS**


	7. Chapter 7: Set In Motion

**The response to the last chapter was amazing! Thank you guys. You warm the cockles of my heart 3.**

* * *

"I saw everything."

 _Everything_.

That single word very nearly knocked the legs right out from under the brunette. The world around him started spinning and the two beers in his stomach started to bubble up as bile threatened to make its way up his esophagus. Every nerve in his body was suddenly hypersensitive and the very air around him had the hair on his arms standing on end. His mouth felt dry, as if he'd been chewing a mouthful of sand, and that scratchy feeling at the back of his throat only worsened the severe bout of nausea that had Eren breaking out into a cold sweat.

Fear. Humiliation. Those were the only two things the brunette felt as his very ability to breathe ceased. He feared what Levi would do to him, what Levi would say. He felt humiliated at having been seen in that position, used and tossed away like a free condom. And to have been seen like that by the man he idolized…Eren felt utterly crushed. Devastated. Mortified. Disgusted by himself and sick to the core.

Swallowing thickly, the brunette whispered, "Everything?"

There was no hesitation; Levi nodded. The up and down movement of the man's head blurred as Eren's eyes lost focus, that sick feeling suddenly becoming overwhelming. The contents of his stomach began to creep up to his through but he clenched his jaw and took a deep breath, fighting the inevitable; the last thing he wanted was to lose his stomach in front of Levi on top of everything else. After a moment, when he was sure he had himself under control, he lifted his eyes to meet Levi's. The shorter man's eyes were impassive. Eren did not know what to make of Levi's lack of expression.

"So you saw me…"

Levi nodded as Eren trailed off. Nothing more needed to be said; the truth was painfully obvious. And Eren was grateful that Levi answered before he put what had transpired into words. Eren sighed shakily. He suddenly felt violated and exposed. His arms wrapped around his body as if he were giving himself a comforting hug. He turned away from Levi then, averting his eyes and letting his gaze fall to the floor as shame overcame him.

Yet despite all the shame and revulsion, the vulnerability and biliousness, a traitorous thought at the very back of his mind caught his attention.

 _Did Levi like what he saw? Did it perhaps…turn him on?_

The brunette scowled and cleared his throat as if it would cleanse his subconscious mind of that thought. Now was not the time to be entertaining perversions…entertaining perversions was what got him into this humiliating situation in the first place.

The silence dragged on. It was weighty and its awkwardness was damn near choking the brunette. In a desperate bid to break it, he asked, "W-what are you doing out here anyway?"

"Training," Levi answered quickly. He raised a brow, and from his peripheral, Levi's expression looked somewhat mischievous.

It was devastatingly sexy.

"Why weren't you there?" Levi asked.

That was unexpected. Eren blinked rapidly as he pondered Levi's question. The implication behind the question was blatant: Levi had noticed his absence. The idea of that was so absurd that all Eren's shame seemed to dissipate in an instant; he turned, arms still around his body, and glanced at Levi with disbelief in his eyes.

"Of course I noticed you weren't there," Levi said as if it were the most obvious thing. Eren blushed lightly as Levi's words confirmed that he had spoken his thoughts out loud, but that bashfulness faltered with Levi's next words. "Your loud bratty outbursts are hard to miss."

Eren whirled around then. "I do not have bratty outbursts!"

Levi simply raised a brow and folded his arms across his chest. It was a condescending stance but the message in it was clear. Point proven, it said. There was nothing Eren could do or say to argue Levi's point, and instead, he just sighed.

After all, he was greatly relieved that the debacle of having been caught in a compromising position was all but forgotten.

"So?" Levi said. "Where were you?"

"I had stuff to do," Eren said.

Stuff – avoiding life. With the love bug only infecting select individuals, Valentine's Day this year was nothing more than an epidemic to Eren Yeager. Having not nearly recovered from his brutal heart break, Eren felt sour when he saw young couples openly expressing their love. It was nothing more than jealousy, and he knew it, but that didn't make it any easier to tolerate.

Levi eyed Eren skeptically, which made the brunette feel particularly self-conscious. Firstly, he could not believe that he was talking to his idol and secondly, he was looking right into the eyes of a man that had witnessed him orally please another man. It was likely the latter that made Eren feel uncomfortable, awkward and quite bashful, but the former only made those feelings exponentially worse.

"I uh…" Eren scratched the back of his neck, pulling his shoulders up. "I'm gonna head home."

"How are you getting home?" Levi asked.

Eren's expression hardened. "In case you haven't heard, I'm drunk. So I'll call a cab."

"I can take you home," Levi said.

That was unexpected. Eren's mask fell away and revealed a truly perplexed expression he stared at Levi as if the man had spoken in tongues. "To my house or yours?"

A blush exploded across Eren's cheeks as the words left his mouth without prior thought, and he slapped his hands over his mouth as if he could suck the words right out of the air. But alas, they had been said, leaving Eren blushing and cursing his impulsive tongue and Levi grinning wickedly at the blushing brunette. And Eren could not deny that that grin was spectacular.

"Yours," Levi said, pausing for a moment before adding, "unless you want to come to mine."

 _HELL YES_!

Eren's jaw fell slack and for a brief moment he was actually genuinely surprised that he hadn't shouted out the words in his mind. Months ago he had joked that he would give his left kidney for a chance to fuck Levi, and here the man was inviting him home. Granted, it was obviously nothing more than a horrible joke – how dare Levi dangle such temptation in front of a young gay boy? – but still, the invitation was given, even if it was only in jest.

"Uhm…"

Levi rolled his eyes. "Just let me take you home."

 _To your house, please…_

"Sure," Eren said. It would save him a few bucks, after all. "I mean…if you don't mind."

"I wouldn't have offered if I did."

As the two men walked towards Levi's car, Eren found himself blushing once again. Despite what Levi had seen, the man was still kind enough to offer him a lift home. Despite him being nothing more than a wannabe fighter, the world champion was going out of his way to help Eren. Eren watched Levi as the man walked a step ahead of him – Levi was short, muscular and had the walk of an alpha male, yet he had a gentle heart. He was paid to beat men until they could no longer stand, but he had a gentle soul. The tabloids had shared information about Levi's likes, dislikes and pedantic behavior, but never have they shared this. Never before had a magazine said that Levi was kind, that Levi was caring, empathetic, sympathetic and most importantly non-discriminatory. If Levi was perturbed by homosexuals, Eren would have undoubtedly seen that side of the man today.

Eren smiled to himself. Levi was a nice guy.

* * *

It took a little bit of convincing, but eventually Eren agreed. Levi had to admit that he was somewhat disheartened by Eren's reluctance to accept a meal before being taken home, but he reminded himself that Eren's reaction was, in fact, completely normal. If he were in Eren's position – if he had been caught red-handed the way Eren had – he would also want to get away from the observer as quickly as possible. Eren had been surprisingly cavalier about the entire situation, which made it exponentially easier to talk to the brunette. If Levi were being honest with himself, he was feeling quite awkward after admitting to having seen Eren's lewd act. If Eren had acted any more awkwardly about the entire situation, Levi would have likely imploded - it would become physiologically possible in that instance.

The two men had sat in undisturbed silence as they ate their meals. Rather, Levi was nibbling at the lettuce in his wrap while Eren was unceremoniously wolfing down a burger as if he hadn't had a meal in days. It was quite the turn-off, but Levi said nothing of it. Now was probably not the best time to make a snide comment about shoving meat into one's mouth like a slut.

While the two ate, Levi looked out at the park before him. The loss of the sun was quite effective in turning a place of joy into an eerie place where nightmares could be bred. Despite being lit by three powerful floodlights, the shadows creeping at the edges of the park and beneath the wooden structures made the darkness ever deeper in contrast to the light. It made the man think back to his days as a teenager – lost in life and unsure of himself, Levi spent many a night seeking solace in the long shadows that scared most people off. In hindsight, it seemed strange to him that he would find comfort in a place like this. It was open and unsafe, and even as he sat here now, he was hyper aware of all that was happening around him. Perhaps the disturbed teenage mind simply didn't possess the ability to find danger the way the adult mind could.

"Thanks for the food," Eren said.

Levi was half expecting Eren's mouth and hands to be smeared with burger sauce, and to see lettuce and tomato littered all over the brunette's torso. So when he turned to Eren to find the brunette in impeccable condition, he was somewhat taken aback. Apparently barbarians did know how to clean up after themselves.

"It's my pleasure," Levi said. He placed his half-eaten wrap back in the brown paper bag. It was definitely not the greatest thing he'd eaten of late.

"You know," Eren said, "if more people saw this side of you, you'd have more fans."

"I don't need more fans," Levi said.

Eren laughed. "So humble."

Levi smiled. "I don't mean it in that way."

"Then how do you mean it?"

The interest in Eren's eyes was genuine. It was clear that the brunette was not simply making menial conversation to fill the silence. It intrigued Levi that a stranger would be so interested in something so random. It was nothing more than a statement passed offhandedly, yet it seemed to have Eren's undivided attention. Because of that profound interest, Levi opted to be vaguely truthful.

"I'm not exactly role-model material."

The brunette cocked his head to the side and scowled; his expression was like that of a confused puppy. It was frighteningly endearing.

"But…" Eren said. "I think you're a good role-model. You've had a rough past but you came out on top and now you're one of the best fighters in the world." Eren kicked a stone at his feet and watched it roll off into the long grass before turning back to Levi. "I mean…you're the kind of guy that could have ended up a druggie and probably dead before thirty but look at you now."

"Flattering," Levi said with a smile tickling the corners of his lips.

His past wasn't private. In fact, his unstable adolescence was one of the contributing factors to his massive success in the sports world. Being a victim of bullying, his use of drugs and his self-harm were not his secrets to keep – anyone who so much as read a magazine knew of the turmoil Levi had suffered. And they knew how sport had changed it all.

Eren sighed. "You inspired me to straighten out my life. And I can tell you now there are thousands, probably millions of other people who could say the same thing."

That caught Levi's attention. He looked at Eren questioningly, wondering what hardships the young man had suffered to need such inspiration. He wondered what kind of a life Eren had before it was apparently straightened out. To he who knew nothing of Eren, the brunette didn't look like he had suffered at all…but Levi knew better than anyone that face value was the deceptive. Never judge a book by its cover.

Levi was about to reply when he realized that he did not know what to say. It was not because he had never received a compliment of this caliber before, on the contrary; many fans had allegedly been inspired by Levi's tragedy-turned-success life story. This was, however, the first time he had sincerely appreciated the compliment. This was the first time that Levi actually felt happy that someone had found inspiration in his shit-show of a life.

"Good." That was all Levi could say. He cringed internally at how offhanded that sounded, but refused to offer an apology. Why would he apologize for the way he talked? He never had before. What was it about Eren that made Levi want to be cautious?

A smile touched Eren's lips. "You're so socially awkward."

The response was instantaneous. "You have no idea."

A comfortable silence settled between the two then. Eren seemed lost in thought – staring unseeingly at the darkness beyond the reach of the floodlights – and Levi was lost staring at Eren. What he was looking at was undoubtedly a man full of surprises. Levi had no doubt that there was much more to Eren than meets the eye and like a child anxious to open his presents on Christmas, Levi found he wanted to unravel Eren's layers and get to the man's core.

"Eren," Levi said. The brunette turned to Levi then, not speaking, but his eyes prompting Levi to continue. Levi drew in a deep breath. He wanted to unravel Eren's layers. He wanted to get to know the brunette. And in order to do so, he had to ask questions. At this moment there was only one question on the man's mind. "What happened between you and Kirstein?"

Eren's eyes widened and he froze mid-breath. He stared at Levi as if the man had sprouted a second head, and if Levi looked carefully, there was a visible tremble on Eren's lips.

"I'll understand if you don't want to share that information with me," Levi said. He truly did. He and Eren were, as it stood, effectively strangers.

The brunette smiled sheepishly and shrugged. "Well…you've seen me blow the guy so I guess nothing is too personal now, huh?"

Scowling, Levi said, "I don't want you to tell me because you feel obligated because of what I'd witnessed, Eren."

Eren drew his shoulders up, held them there for a second and then dropped them with a heavy exhale. "It really doesn't matter." He dropped his gaze, finding sudden interest in his swollen knuckles. "It's such old news anyway…I'm the only fool still caught in the past."

As much as Levi wanted to pry, he did not. Despite the urge to hum or nod in order to prompt Eren to continue, Levi stayed still. This was Eren's story, and Eren would tell it in his own time.

Eventually, the brunette spoke. "It's really nothing much, honestly. We dated, he left me, and here I am." He glanced sideways at Levi, a bemused expression on his face. "Somehow I can't get over that asshole even though we've been apart for months."

"He must have a damn nice asshole," Levi said.

A burst of laughter exploded from Eren that shattered the silence. It wasn't a huff or a chuckle, but a genuine laugh. It was boisterous and annoyingly loud but it made Levi smile. It was a relief to see such happiness on the brunette's face despite what had happened.

"You have no idea…"

The husky tone in Eren's voice had Levi's undivided attention; the man whipped his head towards Eren and was met with a dark, lustful glare that had him clenching his jaw to prevent him from biting his lip. It was sexy, inviting and damn…Levi wanted Eren.

Sighing, the brunette turned his attention back to the empty park, much to Levi's relief. He too turned away, listening to the sounds of dozens of insects as they sang. With not a car nearby it seemed like they were in another world, in their own world. Right now, there was nothing outside of the small sphere they existed in; right now, to Levi, all that mattered was Eren Yeager.

"I just need to get over him," Eren whispered. "Somehow." He sighed again. "I think if I can just kick his ass in the ring I'll move on easier. I know it sounds stupid but…"

"It's not stupid," Levi interrupted. In fact, it was perfectly understandable. "By showing physical superiority over him, you feel like you are in control. If you are in control, he has no control. If he has no control, he has no influence on you."

Eren smiled. "Yeah, something like that."

"I'll help you."

"What?"

The two men stared at each other for a moment before Levi repeated, "I'll help you."

"You'll help me?"

The world-class fighter rose to his feet and came to stand directly before Eren, looking down at the brunette who was looking up at him expectantly. He drank in the sight of Eren's emerald eyes focused on him, looking up at him. This angle was perfect, and Levi could only begin to imagine the things Eren could present him with while looking at him like this. However, now was not the time to openly admire the brunette. Instead of enjoy the view some more, Levi sank down to his haunches, bringing himself to a point lower than Eren's so that Eren was now looking down at him. And he had to admit, Eren looked damn good in a position of superiority.

"I'll help you kick Kirstein's ass," Levi eventually said. "If you'll have me, I'll train you, and you'll flaw that bastard in a matter of weeks."

Eren's eyes widened in wonder like a child who had met Santa Claus for the very first time. His very ears perked up and the color of his eyes lightened a shade. "Really?"

That boyish excitement was endearing. It warmed the cold abyss of Levi's heart. "Yeah. Really."

Before Levi could even process what was happening around him, Eren had lunged off the park bench and very nearly knocked Levi right over. The younger man's arms wrapped around Levi's shoulders, rocking Levi on his heels as Eren embraced him. For a moment, Levi did not know how to react, but as Eren began to profusely thank him in a whisper wrought with desperate sincerity, his arms slowly and tentatively wrapped around the brunette's torso. It felt wonderful to have Eren's warm body right up against his but that warmth had him frozen in place – it was surreal and unexpected, and even though Levi did not know what to do, it felt so damn right.

"You really are an amazing guy," Eren whispered, squeezing tightly. "I promise I won't let you down."

"I know," Levi said, "I know."

* * *

 **Thanks for reading, beautiful people.**

 **OS**


	8. Chapter 8: First Session

**A/N: The reviews for the last chapter were probably some of the best I've read for this story. Thank you so much for the kind words and more importantly, for the encouragement. And on that note I'd like to apologize for the long wait. This chapter just didn't want to come out right. Well here it is; better late than never.**

 **Enjoy ^^**

* * *

18:00 couldn't have come any faster even if it came barreling in at the speed of a meteor colliding with the earth. Minutes turned to hours as Levi anxiously awaited the end of the day, eyes all but glued to his wristwatch as the digits lazily turned, bringing the day ever closer to its end albeit at a glacial pace. Those who were unfortunate enough to encounter the man during the day were met with snappiness and rudeness stemming from his impatience, and as the hours drew nearer to the eighteenth hour of the day, Levi became all but unbearable.

When he arrived at the dojo, he barely raised a brow at those who greeted him. Even the professional fighters, men who were considered to be a part of Levi's personal circle of friends, were ignored as Levi made a beeline to the back of the dojo. His silent and hasty retreat to the area where he usually trained may have been rude – and that was putting it kindly – but it was not entirely unexpected. Those in Levi's social circle saw the man as a constant brooder, and today was just a quiet brooding day instead of one wrought with constant insults, uncalled for judgments and language so foul that a sailor would feel mortified hearing it.

Levi grabbed his skipping rope and quickly unraveled its black, plastic length. He shook it straight and positioned it behind his heels, all the while tilting his head this way and that, backwards and forwards as if that and five little jumps on the tips of his toes would be sufficient to warm up his muscles. Levi then began skipping, moderately paced at first but quickly finding his rhythm and increasing his pace to a harrowing tempo. No one at the dojo could skip as fast as Levi. In fact, some believed that Levi was the fastest man on a skipping rope in the world.

Of course, his disagreement was quite vocal, but other than that he cared little for what the gossips said.

After only five minutes of skipping, Eren Yeager's arrival caught Levi's attention. He immediately slowed down, bleeding off the momentum of the skipping rope until he no longer had to focus on keeping his rhythm. At this moderate pace, he was able to inconspicuously observe the brunette.

Eren's smile was dazzling. It seemed as if that smiled reached from ear to ear, and that smile coupled with his striking emerald eyes gave Eren a boyish expression that was both endearing and devastatingly attractive. Levi could only stare as Eren greeted every single person he walked past, shaking hands with the men, hugging the women and waving at those who were out of his reach. Eren even greeted the cleaner, going out of his way to shake hands with the man wiping down the equipment.

The brunette had clearly been raised well. It pleased Levi greatly.

But then that smile vanished. The warm glint in Eren's eye froze and his friendly gaze hardened. It didn't take much guesswork to deduce what had sapped the joy from Eren's demeanor – Jean Kirstein sauntered by Eren then, hands in his pockets and arrogance oozing from his very pores as he strutted as if the world were his own creation. He winked at Eren, causing the brunette to snarl in reply, which provoked Jean to say something that had Eren snapping back angrily before marching off towards the locker-room.

Kirstein was left behind, laughing at Eren's irritation yet still taking the time to enjoy the view of Eren's ass. He bit his bottom lip, eyes glued to Eren's derriere with a look in them that very obviously showed that he was reliving the events of the previous night in his mind.

 _What a dog_ , Levi thought.

Levi shook his head and busied himself with rolling up his skipping rope, opting to rather not dwell on what he'd seen. After all, given what had happened only the night before, Levi truly shouldn't be surprised by Kirstein's brash display of lusting after obviously provoking Eren. Levi idly wondered if Kirstein got off on Eren's humiliation and degradation.

When Eren emerged from the locker room only a minute later, his head immediately whipped from left to right, no doubt in search of Levi. Those emerald eyes were focused as they scanned the back area of the dojo, knowing exactly where to search to find the man. In only one comprehensive scan of the training area, Eren's eyes met with Levi's, and for a moment neither man moved.

There was some sort of connection in that moment, Levi could feel it. He did not imagine it; he couldn't have. It was not in Levi's nature to seek out 'moments' with others, or to feel for connections that would indicate someone was 'made for him'. He did not believe in that romantic bullshit whatsoever, yet in that moment that he and Eren Yeager met eye to eye, something sparked between them that made time stand still.

 _What…_

As if he had been summoned, Eren immediately made his way to Levi, eyes never leaving the man's. His walk was confident, his strides long and sure, but there was a tension to his posture that was impossible to miss. His hands were balled into fists and his brows furrowed over his focused eyes, jaw clenching and unclenching in time to his steps. The brunette's apprehension was palpable, yet his surety unwavering, and that tango of conflicting auras had Levi absolutely fixated on Eren.

Eren stopped a meter short of Levi and held out his hand. "Hi, Levi."

It took a moment before Levi was able to re-center himself. He brought himself back to the here and now, away from all that was Eren, and eyed the brunette's hand. The first thought he had was that _that_ was likely the very hand Eren used to satisfy himself on lonely nights. The second thought that entered his mind was that Eren had just come from the locker-room and could very well have just used the bathroom. While the idea of Eren's erect cock in that hand was sultry, the mere thought of that same cock now flaccid was absolutely repulsive.

"When last did you wash your hands?" Levi asked.

The brunette scoffed and held out his hands as if for inspection. "I wash every time I take a piss, dad."

 _Daddy, huh?_ Levi raised a brow. "I'd hope you don't use such language when talking to your father."

Instead of reply, Eren shrugged and walked on past Levi. He took one of the skipping ropes neatly rolled up in a plastic container along the wall, calmly unraveled it and began skipping. His form was flawless and his rhythm consistent; the red rope skimmed right underneath the balls of his feet milliseconds after his powerful calf muscles had him bouncing only centimeters into the air. His pace was nothing compared to Levi's, but it was quick, and the effort the brunette expanded was obvious in the tensing of the muscles in his legs and forearms.

It looked too good not to appreciate, however now was not the time.

Levi tore his eyes from Eren's muscular form just in time to see Kirstein turning away with a snarl on those lips. The look in Kirstein's eyes was one of pure hatred, and even though Levi caught the man turning away, it was not hard to deduce that that glare was being shot right at Eren. Levi inconspicuously watched as Kirstein approached another fighter, whispered something to that fighter as the pair looked straight at Eren. The other fighter shrugged, and Kirstein walked away looking angrier than he had seconds earlier.

If Levi had cared any more, he would have wondered what Kirstein had said to the other fighter. He would have wondered what the other fighter's reply had been to Kirstein. However, Levi simply turned back to Eren, thoroughly appreciating the sight of the brunette's taut, muscular body working as that skipping rope accelerated ever more through the air.

Once Eren's fifteen minutes had come to an end, he was glistening from the sheen of sweat on his skin. He looked like he belonged in an advertisement and Levi would be damned but it was breathtaking. There was a boyish excitement in Eren's eyes that no person with a double-digit age could possibly possess, and the wide grin on the young fighter's face was nothing short of absolutely breathtaking. Yet at the same time, Eren's features were masculine and mature; he may have boyishness etched in his features, but those features were that of a man. A devilishly handsome man.

Eren was perfect. Eren was now his apprentice. And by the gods, Levi wished Eren could become so much more.

* * *

Two hours later, and that boyish grin had vanished. The fire in Eren's eyes had died. The zest in his demeanor and the skip in his step had all but been obliterated. Eren Yeager was nothing more than a heap of exhaustion, over-exertion and depleted endurance. One hundred and twenty minutes under Levi's command had pushed the brunette to his limits, leaving him breathless, motionless and all but lifeless.

Looking at Eren as he lay on his back – arms covering his face, desperately trying to catch his breath and wobbling the mass of muscles in his legs about to try and fight off the nauseating burn of lactic acid – Levi's mind went straight to the gutters. Levi imagined Eren in post-coital bliss, his body exhausted to this very point, yet satisfied beyond all measure. Panting, sweating and aching…Levi could only wish that he would have the pleasure of seeing Eren in _this_ state in the sultrier context.

Despite the fantasies his mind was conjuring up, his rationality outweighed that. He looked down at Eren – Eren was deathly pale, trembling and breathing deeply as if he were desperately fighting off nausea.

"Are you okay, brat?" Levi asked.

"No," Eren answered weakly. There was a tremble in that voice that said he did not want to speak for fear of losing his stomach.

The idea of that happening on the dojo floor mortified Levi.

"Come," Levi said, nudging Eren gently in the ribs, earning a disgruntled groan. "Let's get you to the locker-room."

Eren protested with a moan and a weak shake of his head.

"If you puke on my dojo floor I'm going to make you lick it up, clean what's left barehanded and then pay for the re-padding of this entire dojo," Levi said.

"You're cruel…" Eren mumbled.

"You have no idea."

Oh Eren truly had no idea of the cruelty Levi was capable of. Yet just as cruel as Levi could be, he was equally as nurturing. While he was mortified – petrified, actually – by the thought of someone vomiting on the floor on which he trained, he was genuinely concerned about Eren's well-being. He had pushed the brunette to the point of exhaustion, ignoring the young fighter's physical limitations and exploiting the strong will to fight that Eren possessed. He had done all of this, and now Eren was in this state; it was his fault, so Eren was his responsibility, and no one else's.

"Oi," Levi said.

"I'm not feeling so good," Eren mumbled weakly.

"Let me help you," Levi said.

Before Eren could agree or protest, Levi bent down beside the brunette. He swung Eren's arm over his shoulders, ignoring the protest coming from the immobilized fighter, and assisted him to the locker-room. The two hobbled along together, Eren barely able to support his own body weight but Levi withthe strength to support them both. The seven meter walk felt more like two miles; Levi kept his pace slow and his body steady as to not upset Eren's already sensitive constitution.

"Thank you," Eren whispered as they eventually made it to the locker-room.

The sincerity in those words was sobering. Yet that same sincerity made Levi believe that Eren never would have thought that Levi would do such a thing. Was it unfathomable to imagine Levi helping a fellow fighter?

"I'm gonna be sick," Eren suddenly said, tearing himself from Levi and bolting towards the toilet cubicles at the very back of the locker-room.

Levi was more than happy to let him go (and quite relieved to hear the door shut and the toilet seat slam up before the disgusting retching began).

Eren truly had pushed his boundaries today. With his hands still swollen and sensitive to the touch, today's training revolved mainly around cardio, core strength and leg strength. Levi had been merciless, and Eren had been all too eager to comply. Whether to impress or improve, Levi did not know, but Eren went on despite his body's protest. He persevered despite the pain he was feeling, despite the burn in his lungs and the numbness in his limbs. Eren not only pushed his boundaries, he broke them. And now he was paying the price.

Yet despite the consequence, Levi was impressed. He had always known Eren had unfathomable willpower but even he underestimated the brunette. In fact, Eren somewhat reminded him of himself in his younger days; committed and focused to a point of completely disregarding his own physical well-being. It was admirable, but it was also dangerous. He would have to keep an eye on Eren.

"Eren?" someone called out, breaking the silence in the locker room.

Levi glanced up at the call of Eren's name, and was met with the sight of none other than Jean Kirstein, shirtless, making his way to the toilets.

"Eren, are you in here?" Kirstein asked. He knocked on the only shut cubicle, and his question was answered with a gag. "Are you okay?"

"Go away…" Eren said before retching yet again.

Surprisingly, Kirstein complied. He turned away from the cubicle and walked away. Although instead of leave the locker-room, he walked straight up to Levi, posture tense and aggressive and eyes filled with anger and distrust.

"What did you do to him?" Jean asked Levi.

 _What?_

"Excuse me?" Levi replied.

"What. Did you do to him?" Kirstein asked again.

Levi could not believe what was happening. The very man who had not only broken Eren's heart, but who continued to use and mistreat Eren, was standing before Levi and confronting the man on Eren's well-being as if he actually cared. The very same _dog_ who wanted nothing more than to humiliate Eren, who wanted nothing more than cheap, easy sexual favors from Eren, had the audacity to act concerned and possessive over Eren…who was no longer his to be possessive over.

 _Fuck you_.

Levi did not answer Kirstein immediately. In fact, it looked as if he were about to ignore Kirstein completely. He simply uncrossed his arms, uncrossed his legs and stood up from the bench on which he was sitting. For a few seconds, he was motionless. He did not look at the man before him but he could sense the brunette's anger. It was palpable. It was uncalled for. Jean Kirstein had no right to feel this way about Eren, and absolutely no right to confront Levi in this manner.

"Answer me," Kirstein demanded.

Levi took a step forward then, closing the gap between Kirstein and himself and lifting his eyes to meet the angry hazel orbs of Eren's ex-lover. Kirstein flinched slightly as their eyes met but otherwise stood his ground, holding himself firm as Levi stood but a breath away from him. Valiant, Levi thought, but stupid.

"What I did to Yeager is none of your goddamn concern."

"The hell it is!" Kirstein snapped, lifting a hand to shove Levi on the shoulder.

Big mistake.

Before his hand could make contact with the shorter man's body, Levi had Kirstein's wrist in a lock and twisted the brunette's arm in such a way that his whole body followed suit, hissing a profanity as he was forced to his knees. Levi stood behind him with his arm twisted in an unnatural position, teetering on the brink of tearing a muscle or worse yet, snapping a bone.

"Stay out of my fucking business," Levi growled, twisting Kirstein's arm further, threatening to go all the way. Kirstein cried out as his arm got ever closer to breaking. "And the next time I so much as hear a rumor about you laying hands on someone I will fucking kick you out of my dojo and make fucking sure that your piece of shit self _never_ competes again, do you fucking understand, Kirstein?"

"Ah, fuck," Jean growled as Levi twisted harder. "Yes! Fuck! I ge-ah! I get it!"

"Good." Levi released Kirstein then, pushing the brunette forward and sending him to the floor. "Now fuck off."

The brunette was on his feet and making his way to his locker without hesitation. As he walked, Levi watched him flex his fingers and rub his arm, presumably to make the burn of the manhandling dissipate. He quietly collected his bags from his locker, throwing Levi one last hateful glare before slinking out of the locker-room without a word. The dog's obedience was was pleasing, almost as pleasing as his leaving.

Only once Kirstein was clear of the area did Levi relax. He breathed out a long sigh of relief before turning towards the cubicles to check on Eren. As he walked, he recounted what had just happened and once again found it unbelievable how Kirstein, after everything Levi had witnessed, had the audacity to behave like that. The possessive nature of the human male could truly never be underestimated.

"Eren?" Levi asked, knocking softly on the cubicle. "Are you alright, brat?"

A moment of silence passed before Eren eventually said, "Yeah."

"Let's get you home."

"Are you taking me home again?" Eren asked. Despite how weak his voice was, the smile was evident.

A smile touched the corners of Levi's mouth. "Your place or mine?"

Eren sighed. He did not answer immediately, and Levi could only hope that it was because he was trying to find a way to say he wanted to go home with Levi. To Levi's house.

This moment was another conundrum. Just like last night where Levi's answer to a simple question had the potential to make or break any sort of relationship between the two, what Levi or Eren said next may very well be the first brick on the foundation laid last night. Yet despite that, Eren did not speak. The silence dragged on, and Levi's hope stretched until it was so thin it was a barely recognizable element in his mind.

Did he want Eren to come home with him? Of course! Despite the fantasies he'd had of Eren, despite wanting to bed the gorgeous brunette, he wouldn't dream of taking advantage of Eren in this state. It would be inhumane. Besides, Levi added as an afterthought, he preferred his lovers feisty and not limp.

Did Eren want to come to his house? Maybe. Eren hadn't explicitly said no, and that resigned sigh had a world of hidden intent. Levi knew he should _never_ assume anything about anyone, but there was something about that resignation that opened the floor to an invitation.

 _Fuck it_. Levi knew that if he never took any risks, he would never reap any rewards. After all, it was not as if he would be asking Eren out…he would simply be suggesting Eren could spend the night at his home to rest and remain under his supervision.

"You can come home with me if you'd like," Levi said, pinching his eyes shut and balling his hands into fists as soon as the words left his mouth.

The silence that followed was harrowing. Levi could feel his heart begin to beat faster and harder as it started crawling from his chest up into his throat. He could feel the adrenaline polluting his blood; his fingertips and lips started tingling, his skin became itchy and his mouth was suddenly parched. It took all his self-control to keep his breathing steady and even then he could hear the unevenness as he breathed.

Why was he feeling this way? It was not as if he had asked Eren to sleep with him. It was not as if he were asking Eren out on a date. His words were innocent. It was a simple suggestion made out of concern. There was no ulterior motive hidden in his sentence. Or was there? A hope, perhaps, of something to come, maybe not tonight, but in the future.

 _No_.

The toilet lid closed. Levi held his breath. The toilet flushed. Levi's heart stood still. The cubicle unlocked, and Levi stepped back, unsure of what he would see when that door opened. And it opened painfully slowly. Levi watched as the blue wood yielded, eventually bringing Eren into view, and it took so much more willpower than it should have to meet Eren's eyes.

And when he did, relief very nearly drowned him.

Eren was smiling. Weakly, but the happiness in those mesmerizing emerald orbs of his was infectious. He looked like a boy who had just received his favorite toy as a gift from Santa, and was now standing before that very Santa in wonder and filled with thanks.

"Really?" Eren asked.

Levi smiled. "I fucked you up like this. I can't exactly leave you to fend for yourself, now can I?"

 _Smooth, idiot_.

Eren chuckled. "No. That wouldn't be very nice."

* * *

 **They say one must take responsibility for one's actions. And here we are, on our way to Levi's home. Stay tuned to find out what happens next ;P**


	9. Chapter 9: Jean

**A/N: This chapter goes out to _shaded-blue-fangs_ : Thanks for the awesome review! It sparked an idea *smirks***

 **This one is from Jean's POV. Enjoy ^^**

* * *

Why? No, not why. _How_? How the hell did Eren manage to get Levi Ackerman to train him? Levi Ackerman – world number three, a legend, an inspiration to millions, a man whose life was the personification of the rising of the phoenix. Levi hated people; he distanced himself from those who weren't his friends, and he was rude and obnoxious despite his status as a role-model to millions. He had never personally trained another fighter in his life and had, on numerous occasions, publicly declared that he never would. Not because no one was worth his time, but because he had the patience of an unpinned grenade and the empathetic capacity of a vacuum – direct quotes. Yet despite Levi's vehement insistence that "I'm not needed because young shit-stains can train with a qualified sensei", there was no escaping what Jean had seen today.

Levi Ackerman was training Eren Yeager. And Jean wanted to know how the hell Eren managed to get that right. What had Eren done to change the mind of someone as insistent as Levi? How much was Eren forking up? Who had he bribed? What information did he have about Levi to blackmail the man into training him?

These thoughts whirled around in Jean Kirstein's head as he sat in front of the muted TV in his shared two-bedroom apartment. The TV's remote hung precariously between his fingers as he stared unseeingly at the flashing images on the screen. A reporter wordlessly told the story of the latest clashes between US troops and Isis but Jean saw nothing of it; his mind was stuck in a frenzy of confusion and jealousy.

Of course he was jealous. As a young aspiring fighter, who wouldn't be jealous of someone receiving training from one of the world's best? And that someone wasn't just anyone…it was his ex-boyfriend, Eren Yeager. And that brought about another reason why he was jealous; Levi was getting to spend time with Eren and he was not.

He clicked his tongue and reached out towards the bottle of brandy on the coffee table before him. His fingers wrapped around the neck of the bottle, and without lifting his eyes, he brought the bottle to his lips and took a swig. He swallowed stoically, savoring the warmth that trickled down his throat. The burn of the cheap liquor did not even make him flinch. In fact, he did not feel the burn at all. How could he feel anything over the burn of betrayal, the bitterness of jealousy and the crippling nausea of heartache?

Heartache. Amidst the storm in his mind, the pain in his chest drew his attention.

Did he ruthlessly and uncaringly break up with Eren for absolutely no apparent reason? Yes. Did he break his lover's heart? Yes. Did he continue to taunt Eren and treat Eren as a lesser man, shamelessly seducing him and using him time and again, and each time tossing him aside like a used condom? Yes. Yes. He did that. Again and again, he manipulated Eren, took what he wanted, and broke Eren's heart all over again. Every single time.

Did Jean miss Eren? Yes. Did Jean constantly think about Eren? Yes. Did he regret his decision to walk away from what was possibly the best thing that had ever happened to him? Oh, the regret consumed him. He woke every morning with the bitterness of regret in his mouth and regret was the last thing he felt before he closed his eyes every night. His regret had become so consuming, so profound that even seeing Eren's face had that foul acid of remorse churning in his gut.

He missed Eren so much that he would rather break Eren over and over again just so that he could get something, _anything_ from his ex-lover. He would rather see Eren suffer time and again just to get that little bit of attention that Eren was always all too eager to give. But if Eren's attention and affection was what Jean craved, why did he hurt Eren time and again?

Because he didn't deserve a second chance.

Eren deserved better than him, and Jean knew it. He never gave in to Eren's asking him back, to the begging and pleading of "just once more". He would never give into that desperate please from his ex-lover because he knew that he was toxic and that Eren was better off without him.

But that didn't stop him from taking what Eren had to give.

Was that selfish? It was downright disgusting, and Jean knew it. Would he stop? _Never_.

Jean sighed. His eyes snapped back into focus just as a particularly bright flash on the TV screen lit up the dark room. He watched with disinterest as the orange ball of flames dissipated, leaving behind a thick black cloud. He idly wondered how much that single attack cost, which led him to wonder how many lives it took.

Not that he cared.

Another swig from the bottle had Jean's mind right back on Eren. He had left Eren. One day, without warning, he told Eren he no longer wanted to be in a relationship. At the time, it seemed like a good decision – he was young, energetic and wanted to focus on himself and not bear the burden of needing to consider his partner with every decision he made. He wanted to be free, unbound and able to live his life as he pleased. At the time, though, he did not realize how much he loved Eren.

Sure, he said it all the time. I love you. Those words were easy to say. When he said them, he didn't feel like he was lying. He cared deeply for Eren and they spent a lot of time together. All his free time, in fact, was spent with Eren. Was that not love? Yes. So he said it. Whenever Eren said it, he said it back, and he said it to Eren without needing a prompt. It felt truthful, it felt perfectly fine to say, but at the time he did not understand the depth of his words. He did not understand just how true they were.

Only when he walked away from Eren had he learnt just how much he loved that man.

 _If you love him, let him go_.

How he treated Eren made him sick to his core. Every time he saw those beautiful emerald eyes tear up because of what _he_ said or did, his heart shattered. It tore him apart on a cellular level yet he did it time and again. He took from Eren because Eren was impossible to resist, but walked away every time because he felt like he was impossible to forgive.

Was that selflessness or cowardice?

Jean drew in a long breath and closed his eyes. As his lids drew together, streaks of wetness touched his cheeks. He clenched his jaw and exhaled forcefully, pinching his eyes shut tightly as if he were trying to blind himself to reality. It was not uncommon for him to shed tears over Eren at night. In fact, it was normal. It was perfectly normal to feel the burn of his tears on his skin, tears that weighed a ton as they fell from his face to his lap. These tears he cried night after night bore pain, regret and longing.

The onset of this moment was insidious. It crept in like a fog coming in from the ocean. The deep ache in his soul came slowly, but it left violently; this moment of reflection, loneliness and sadness left as suddenly as a bolt of lightning tearing through the night sky. In the blink of an eye, the ache was gone, and anger was left in its wake.

"Fuck!" Jean hissed, balling his hands into fists as white hot rage tore through his body.

As the anger consumed his mind, all feelings of remorse and longing dissipated. Hatred infiltrated his mind, and the longer Jean lingered on that toxic feeling, the more pointed it became. The incident from the locker-room came back to him then, and as he relived those two minutes, that hatred in his mind focused on one thing. One person.

Levi Ackerman.

How dare Levi lay hands on him? How dare Levi threaten him? Jean clenched his jaw tightly, feeling heat explode on his skin as he relived the feelings of pain and helplessness he felt as Levi held him in place. He felt so damn weak and at this moment, the memory of that powerlessness was only feeding his seething anger. Yet despite that, what angered him most was what Levi had done to Eren.

Eren had been reduced to a wreck because of Levi's training. And to see Eren ill and suffering because of another man's actions…it made Jean sick with rage.

How dare Levi do that to Eren? Eren, _his_ Eren!

"No!" Jean growled, prying his fingers from one another and flexing them. He took a deep breath. "He is _not_ mine. Not mine. Eren is…" Jean grabbed fistfuls of his head and breathed out shakily. "Fuck…"

Thinking back now, was he really as concerned about Eren as he made himself out to be? Of course he was worried! Eren was sick. Jean may not have been the most compassionate person alive but he was no asshole – he was genuinely worried. But what made him act out was not that worry…it was jealousy. Jealousy because Levi was getting from Eren what he wanted – Eren's time, attention and commitment.

"Jesus, Jean," he whispered to himself, voice trembling. Get a grip. Get a grip."

 _A grip on that bottle_.

Without thinking, his hand shot out and he grabbed the neglected bottle of brandy. Instead of take one sturdy swig, Jean kept the bottle against his lips and poured the warm fluid down his throat as if it was water and he were parched. As it filled him up it took away what he did not want to feel – he wanted to purge himself of his anger, he wanted to numb his pain. He wanted to forget what he had lost. He wanted to forget Eren.

"Jean?" a soft voice called out.

Jean tore the bottle from his lips, and in his haste to deposit the bottle on the table before him carelessly spilt a cupful of brandy. He paid no mind to the patter of amber fluid on the tiled floor, instead turning to the man who had called his name.

Marco: not only his housemate and best friend, but also his foundation. The reason he was still sane. His keeper.

"Are you okay?" Marco asked. His dark eyes flitted to the bottle and his brows drew together in concern as he noted that the bottle had fallen below half.

Jean shook his head. Drunk from the liquor, sick from jealousy and crippled by pain, Jean could not hide behind his stoic mask right now. He was in agony; his missed his Eren. He wanted Eren back. He still loved Eren and he realize more each day just what he had lost. He could not lie. In this state of raw emotional turmoil, Jean could not be prideful and stubborn; he was too desperate for reprieve.

"Talk to me," Marco said as he came to sit beside Jean.

"It's the same shit, Marco," Jean whispered.

The one thing Jean loved about Marco was that Marco never pitied him. Marco was empathetic and caring, but not pitiful. Despite the sadness in those dark, familiar eyes, Jean could not detect a hint of pity. It was because of that that Jean was able to open up to Marco in this manner.

Jean shrugged, defeated. "It doesn't help talking about the same shit over and over again."

"If it's the same stuff, then change it," Marco said. He rested his hand on Jean's shoulder and gave a reassuring squeeze. "I know you think you don't deserve a second chance, but Jean, you don't deserve to suffer like this either."

"I do," Jean snapped. "I hurt him, Marco, I hurt him bad." Jean pressed his fist against his forehead. "I may as well have driven a knife into his gut and left him to bleed out. I've…I've broken him."

"People heal, Jean," Marco said softly. "If he's willing to give you another chance, it means he's willing to forgive you."

Jean was shaking his head before Marco could finish speaking. "How the hell am I supposed to look him in the eye? I've said and done some horrible shit to him."

"Learning to live with your ghosts is easier that running away from them."

"That's the biggest load of shit I've ever heard."

A sheepish grin tugged at the corners of Marco's lips. "Then you clearly haven't heard the shit that comes out of your mouth sometimes."

Jean's eyes widened comically as he slowly turned his gaze to Marco, mouth agape and bewilderment in his hazel orbs. To hear a profanity come from the lips of a saint was an abomination, and said saint simply winked at Jean with an uncharacteristic smirk before turning his attention to the TV.

For a moment, Jean was left staring at Marco's profile. The shock of the indecent language had withered, but Jean was left with new awe – he was in awe of Marco as a person. Marco was the gentlest man Jean had ever met, the kindest, most patient person Jean had ever had the pleasure of befriending. Even though they had only known each other for a few months, it felt as though they had grown up together. Marco was easy to talk to, understanding, and most importantly, Marco knew exactly when not to linger.

"Did you know that up until 2006, rape was only classified as rape when it was the non-consensual vaginal penetration of a female by a male?" Marco suddenly said.

Oh, and he was an encyclopedia of random facts.

Wondering what brought about the sudden statement, Jean turned to the TV. Scantily clad men and women were gathered in protests, holding up banners that read _no excuses for rape and violence_ and _my little dress does not mean yes_ and _blame the system not the victim_. He scowled; the 'rape culture' protests had been going on for weeks. Not only were women being blamed for the violence subjected to them, but the system failed victims time and again. Jean wondered what kind of a spineless, depraved pig would force themselves on another person in that manner.

"Anal penetration of a female or a male, or penetration by objects was classified as indecent assault, or sexual assault," Marco continued.

So that meant that prior to 2006, if a man was raped by another man, the rapist would only be convicted of indecent assault at best. Jean clicked his tongue. There were probably hundreds, if not thousands of men who got off with a slap on their wrist, or worse yet, no punishment at all. The system failed victims then, and it continued to do so more than ten years later.

"Now rape is rape," Marco said. "Whether it is vaginal, anal, with an object…"

"That's good," Jean interrupted. Perhaps there was hope for humanity after all. He turned to Marco and raised a brow. "How exactly do you know this?"

"Case study," Marco said with an apologetic grin. He suddenly jumped up from the couch and rushed off to the kitchen. "Hey, I'm going to order some pizza. Are you game?"

Jean laughed. "What the hell kind of a question is that?" The day Jean said no to pizza would be the day the world would stop spinning on its axis. "I'll pay."

"No, it's on me," Marco said. "I insist."

Jean spent rest of the night on the couch, watching movies with Marco instead of drinking himself into a stupor alone. He appreciated not only Marco's company, but also the warmth and comfort the man exuded. There was something about Marco that made Jean feel at home, and as the hours dragged on and he eventually fell asleep in front of the TV, he came to the realization that he couldn't have asked for a better friend.

However, at times like these, Jean wondered if he even deserved such a friend.

* * *

 **Thank you :)**

 **OS**


	10. Chapter 10: Levi's Home

**A/N: Darlings, I apologies profusely for disappearing. I'm sure everyone can agree that 2016 has been one hell of a year. Things took a drastic turn and I had zero time to write. But I am on holiday now and hope to get out a few more chapters before it ends. Once again, many apologies and thank you all for sticking around. ^.^**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this chapter.**

* * *

Levi Ackerman's home.

It wasn't grand, but there was elegance in its simplicity. The fifth-floor apartment was stylish and modern, and was sparsely furnished to give the illusion of spaciousness despite its humble size. The atmosphere was not a homely one, and while the apartment looked incredible, it looked more like something one would see in a magazine than a place one would live in.

It suited Levi's personality perfectly, Eren thought.

Levi set Eren down on a couch in the living room and stepped back. Those steely eyes that made fighters quiver in the ring seemed lifeless as they stared at Eren, but the harder Eren looked into those hues, the more concern he saw in them. He found himself wondering if the concern he saw was being hidden intentionally, or if it was simply in the older man's nature to conceal those sorts of emotions.

"How are you feeling?" Levi eventually asked.

Had Eren not known any better, he would have said Levi was asking out of obligation rather than concern. The man's voice was impassive, detached even.

"I'm okay," Eren replied. "You didn't have to bring me here."

One fine brow raised and amusement flitted in Levi's eyes for just a nanosecond before he said, "God alone knows what will happen to a brat like you if you were left alone in that state."

"My sister's a paramedic, you know," Eren retorted with a pout.

"Would you rather I take you home?"

"No!"

Eren immediately averted his eyes and felt his cheeks heat up as a blush crept onto them. He silently berated himself for his juvenile excitement, wishing not for the first time in his life that he had better control of what came from his mouth. His mother had always told him to think before speaking, but that simple lesson never seemed to transmute into his everyday life, often to his embarrassment.

"Do you have any allergies or medical conditions I need to know about?" Levi suddenly asked.

Emerald eyes snapped up to meet Levi's, and once again, those grey hues betrayed nothing. They were lifeless, yet they focused on Eren as if Eren were the only thing in existence in that moment. It made the brunette shift uncomfortably as he wondered what Levi was thinking, but after a few seconds he belatedly realized that Levi was simply waiting for an answer.

"Bees?" Eren said with a shrug.

"You're allergic to bees?"

Eren pursed his lips and nodded. "Yup."

Levi nodded before turning away, and Eren may have imagined it but he swore he saw a smile on the man's lips.

"I'm going to make you some Reydrat and something to eat," Levi said as he walked off. Eren glanced back over the couch and watched as Levi disappeared into the kitchen. "Go shower in the meantime."

If Eren were a dog, his ears would have perked up. Did Levi Ackerman just tell him to go shower?

"Second door on the right," Levi said, his head popping out of the kitchen. He glared at Eren, who was staring at him absolutely dumbfounded. "What?"

"Nothing!" Eren quickly said. He jumped up from the couch, stumbling forward as his hasty rising caused his balance to betray him.

"Be careful, brat," Levi snarled. "If you knock your head and bleed out in my apartment, I'll get arrested."

 _Was that supposed to be a joke?_ Eren wondered, turning to glance at Levi with an amused yet unsure smile. But when he turned, Levi was gone; he'd retreated back into the kitchen.

Instead of question the man any further, Eren quietly made his way to the bathroom as instructed. He made his way down the short passage, and as he came to the second door on the right, he paused and raised one arm. With a scowl, he lowered his head, placed his nose as close to his armpit as possible, and took a deep breath in.

"Fuck!" he hissed. "Yeah. Must shower."

Like the rest of the apartment, the bathroom was sparse yet elegant. The tiles on the walls and floor were black and grey, and both the basin and the bathtub were clear glass. A massive mirror rested above the basin, and as Eren gazed up at it, he wondered if it would be of any use to someone of Levi's length. He smirked at the thought before dropping his eyes to gaze at himself, and for a moment he imagined Levi standing beside him. The professional fighter was a few inches shorter than him. As he stared at himself, imagining Levi beside him, that smirk softened into a genuine smile.

 _We'd look good together,_ Eren thought.

He stayed like that for a moment longer, wishing, dreaming and quietly fantasizing about simply being able to have that. For the first time, he wanted Levi not out of lust, but wanted the man himself. Today, Eren had seen a side of Levi that he never had imagined existed; compassion, empathy, concern and kindness. Today, Eren realized that Levi was a good man, that beneath those hard layers and the abrasive edge many knew, there was a softness that was well-hidden from the world.

Eren sighed. Of course it would forever remain a dream, a fantasy. Even if by some miracle Levi wanted him, their personalities and their lifestyles were worlds apart. Eren was a student desperately trying to make ends meet by being a waiter, while Levi was an international sporting icon. There were a hundred reasons that it would never work out between the two of them. Eren could never have a man like that.

Instead of dwell on it any longer, Eren turned on the shower and stripped himself bare as he waited for the water to heat up. Once scalding, he stepped under the powerful jet of water and released a long, appreciative moan as the heat cascaded down on his aching form. The warmth soothed the ache in his muscles as the steam cleansed the worries in his mind, and as he stood under the water with his hand against the wall, his eyelids eventually drew together as he reached a state of complete relaxation. In that moment, it felt as though he were suspended in a place where time didn't exist, where the entire concept of space was void. He felt lost, not in his own mind or even his own universe, but lost to the entirety of existence. He felt whole, complete, and free.

A smile touched his lips as he felt his warm, wet skin underneath his fingertips. Trailing his hand down his torso, he felt the ridges of muscles carefully sculpted over the last year. The evidence of his commitment bulged beneath his skin, and as those curious fingers explored his chest, Eren wondered if Levi would like his body. He imagined the man's fingers where his were, carefully and lightly trailing across his skin, feeling his pecs as they vibrated lightly from the exhaustion that still had them in its hold. And as his fingers brushed against his nipple, a jolt tore through his body that had his eyes snapping open and his fantasy abruptly torn apart.

He was not in his own shower. He was not in his own home. The sleek black wall before him was a cruel reminder that he was not in a place where he could have thoughts like that. That curious hand on his chest balled into a fist and dropped to his side. His eyes followed it, but as his gaze dropped his attention was stolen by the sight of his rigid cock, standing proudly erect and oblivious to the situation. Oblivious to the fact that now was not the time, and this was not the place.

A long breath hissed out from between Eren's clenched teeth. His eyes flitted to the shower door, guilt swimming on those desperate emerald orbs. He stared at the fogged-up glass for a moment before dropping his gaze yet again to glare at the evidence of his arousal. It gave a twitch; aching for a touch, calling for that release. Eren clenched his jaw before his eyes darted to the shower door again for just moment before dropping back to his cock. The brunette drew in a deep breath as his hand inched closer to his rigid flesh.

 _What the hell. He'll never know._

* * *

As soon as the bathroom door shut, Levi let out a sigh. His eyes dropped to the orange liquid fizzing in the glass on the counter before him, and for the first time tonight, he wondered just what the hell he was doing. He had a man that was nearly a decade younger than him in his home, in his _shower_ , and he had every intention of letting said man stay the night. Just what did he hope to achieve by doing this, he wondered, but that question was quickly answered with the obvious. Why else would a man bring home someone he was sexually attracted to?

"It's not like that," he hissed under his breath.

Scowling, he shook his head. No, it was not his intention to bed the brunette, but would he be telling the truth if he said he didn't somewhat hope that the night might go in that direction at some point? It would be a blatant lie, and as much as he hated that fact, he could not deny it. Whether it was due to his attraction to Eren, the fact that he hadn't experienced physical intimacy for as long as he could remember, or both, he didn't know. In fact, he didn't care to know, because the mere fact that he was having those sorts of thoughts and feelings was enough to infuriate him. He hated being at the mercy of his physiology.

Discipline. Levi all but worshiped it. Physical and mental discipline. To execute perfect control over one's body and mind was what had brought Levi to being one of the world's most feared and respected MMA fighters. It was what brought Levi to being a highly respected, desired, and dare he say _loved_ Dominant. Discipline was not only the foundation of Levi's very existence, it was law. It was non-negotiable.

So why had he lost it all with Eren?

Eren had this infuriating ability to drag his mind down into the gutters. Eren reduced Levi to nothing more than a lusting man, the very type of man he loathed and swore never to become again. Eren broke Levi's focus and infiltrated his mind, consuming his thoughts like a virus. The obsession lead to fantasizing, and that fantasizing lead to the abandonment of the fundamentals that Levi believed separated him from other men.

He ran a slightly calloused hand through his hair as he drew a deep breath. What did he hope to achieve, indeed? He knew full-well that he couldn't pursue the relationship that he wanted with Eren; Eren's ability to destroy Levi's focus would prove detrimental to them both, and as a matter of fact, it could prove dangerous. With the things Levi wanted to do with Eren, the brunette's life could be in danger if Levi were distracted in that manner.

What about a vanilla relationship? Levi almost laughed at the thought. No vanilla relationship of his had ever lasted beyond a few months at best, and Levi vowed never to enter into a relationship again until it was with someone he could have in every way. He needed to be stimulated on levels beyond emotional and sexual; he craved the deep intimacy that dominance and submission could provide, that trust that transcended that of simple love. Levi needed a partner that he could rely on to satisfy his needs beyond that of being a man.

Levi curled his hands around the glass of Rehydrat. It was starting to cool down. The drink was disgusting at best, and once cooled, it tasted like nothing more than diluted seawater. Eren would undoubtedly have something to say about it; Levi could imagine the protest, the bratty outburst and the boyish pout as Eren fought against it. A smile touched the man's lips as he imagined this, but as soon as he felt that endearing feeling warming him up inside, he pursed his lips, eradicating the smile and his eyes hardened as he scowled.

"Why the fuck is that brat taking so long to shower?" Levi growled out.

He abandoned the fizzing drink in the kitchen and made his way down the passage towards his bathroom with every intention of banging on the door and demanding the brat finish up immediately. His hands were already balled into fists at his side and his muscles were already taut, ready to propel those fists against the wood of the bathroom door. As he arrived at the door, he turned towards it and raised his fist, ready to pound the wood angrily when a garbled moan had him balk. With his fist hanging in the air, Levi glared at the door with his ears perked up and heart steadily beginning to beat faster as he feared the worst; had Eren fallen?

Another quiet moan came from the bathroom, one that seemed wrought with pain. Levi's blood ran cold as he imagined that Eren had lost his footing in the shower and had fallen and hit his head, and was clinging desperately to consciousness while trying to call for help. The man reached for the handle and was about to depress it when the strained call of his name had him paralyzed. Something told him not to open the door. Something was telling him that Eren was not in trouble. Something was telling him…

"Fuck…L-Levi…"

Levi jumped back to the other side of the passage and stared at the door as if it had offended him. He swallowed thickly as his sharp mind quickly put two and two together – Eren was not in pain, he was in _pleasure_.

The brat was masturbating in his shower.

"Jesus Christ," he whispered, sinking down to his haunches with his back against the wall. A long breath hissed out between his teeth as he settled, his eyes losing focus as he gazed at the bathroom door with feelings of revulsion and excitement dancing within him.

Eventually, that unfocused gaze retreated to blackness as Levi closed his eyes. He closed his eyes and lowered his head as both his hands gripped at his hair. That denied hope of the night going a certain direction had lost its deniability; Levi wanted to sleep with Eren. There was no running from that truth now, and knowing that Eren quite obviously felt that attraction to Levi as well, the man knew the he could get what he wanted. Tonight, they could both get what they wanted. All he had to do was entice Eren – something he was sure would not be difficult to achieve – and then both men would be happy. All he had to do was put the idea in Eren's mind, and the rest of the night would be history. All he had to do was make the first move, and he could claim the object of his desires.

One move, and Eren would be taken, claimed and objectified. One move, and Levi would become the kind of man he loathed. One move…one move that he so desperately wanted to make.

"This is a bad idea," he whispered to himself. "A bad fucking idea. The brat must go."

"Levi?"

Grey eyes shot up and slowed as they were met with a perfectly chiseled torso. Levi couldn't help but stare at the V that dipped in beneath the towel, he couldn't help but drink in the planes of perfectly sculpted abdominal muscles resting behind the boy's bronzed skin. He had seen Eren shirtless plenty of times before, but the sight from afar did the brunette no justice. From afar, Eren looked lanky; long bands of muscle stretched almost desperately over his long form. But without the distance, it was apparent that Eren had a lithe, athletic figure perfect for fighting.

The man had to fight to keep his eyes from lingering, but they had already lingered too long, he feared. Sparing what dignity he could, he steeled his expression and lifted his eyes to meet with the emerald hues of the boy towering over him. At the clash of green and grey, Eren flinched slightly; it made Levi cringe, but nothing about his form betrayed the resentment he felt for himself at making Eren feel frightened.

"Do you want me to go home?" Eren asked, his voice small and desperate.

Without hesitation, Levi answered. "Yes."

Eren's expression fell. The light in those emerald hues was snuffed out as if an otherworldly darkness had taken over the boy's soul and squeezed the very will to live from it. The glint of happiness that was ever present in his form was annihilated; Eren's posture slackened as he eventually averted his eyes, thick brows drawing over confused and dejected hues that were now desperately seeking something to look at, anything, just not Levi.

"I'll uhm…" Eren pointed over his shoulder with his thumb. "I'll get dressed then uh…I'll call a cab."

Levi wondered if he was being heartless. He knew he answered Eren's question a little too quickly, a little too brashly, but had he lingered on that question for even a second, he would have said "no" instead. Truth is, he didn't want Eren to go home. That was the last thing he wanted, but he knew that if Eren were to stay the night, things would transpire that should not.

"I'll take you home," Levi said in a futile attempt to appear less cold.

"No," Eren said. "I don't want to bother you any further."

The cold, detachment in Eren's voice caught Levi completely off guard. Levi's eyes snapped up to meet Eren's, for a moment refusing to believe that the callous voice came from the brunette. But when his eyes met with Eren's, there was nothing in those hardened emerald orbs; Eren looked all but lifeless.

Without another word, Eren turned and slipped back into the bathroom, quietly closing the door behind him. The door may as well have been slammed shut with the way its deep reverberations tore through Levi's body. It rocked through him, the vibrations making his skin itch as the image of Eren's cold, lifeless eyes boring into his own stuck in his mind. He had never imagined Eren was capable of such an expression; it was frightening to see someone who was inherently passionate look so devoid of feeling. But what made that itch burn was not the expression, but rather the fact that he was the one who had caused it.

When the bathroom door opened and Eren reemerged, wearing the same clothes he had worn before his shower, Levi jumped to his feet.

"What was the fucking point of showering?" he spat out.

Eren balked. He stared at Levi in confusion for only a second before anger flooded his voided hues, seemingly discoloring them as his glare hardened. "What?"

"You can't shower and then put on the same filthy clothes afterwards," Levi growled, pointing at Eren.

"I don't have other clothes!" Eren snapped. "Why the hell does it matter to you anyway?"

Levi opened his mouth to reply, but no words came. Why did it matter? Truth be told, it was none of his business what the brat wore going home. And Eren had a valid point; without a fresh change of clothes, the brunette had no choice but to wear his dirty training gear. Despite it being disgusting, it was none of Levi's business.

Using what little control he still had left, he backed away from the argument before it could escalate any further. "Nothing."

Eren sighed. Anger evidently simmered in his veins but it was clear that he was trying to contain himself. "Let me just go."

As he took a step towards the front door, Levi's arm shot out and blocked the younger man's path. Eren's precariously poised calm shattered as Levi's muscular forearm collided with his chest, and as the brunette opened his mouth, he threw all caution to the wind.

"What the fuck is your problem, Levi?" Eren yelled. "First you look after me pretending like you care, then you treat me like shit and kick me out of your house, and now you won't let me go. Do you want me to pay you for your services? Because I sure as hell didn't need you playing doctor…"

"I wasn't pretending." Levi's voice was low, but the anger in it was tangible. "I brought you here because I do care what happens to you…"

"Then why are you kicking me out?" Eren interrupted. The heat in his eyes died down and the confused desperation swimming in them had Levi swallowing a lump in his throat as guilt tickled his conscience. "I like you, Levi. You're awesome. You're my role-model. Seeing this side of you showed me you're really a man I can look up to, but you're fucking it up. What happened between then and now that made you change your mind about me staying here?"

Sighing, Levi stepped backwards until his back hit the wall. For a moment he considered being honest and telling Eren what he had heard. But he decided against it; he had already seen and heard enough of the brunette's lustful affairs to have destroyed the young man's dignity. Yet despite sparing Eren, he deserved an answer. The man was hurt and confused, and Levi would be damned if he left such a sour taste in Eren's mouth.

"It's a personal reason, Eren," Levi eventually said. He forced a little smile as his eyes came to meet Eren's. "Please try and understand. You did nothing wrong. I just realized that it would be better for both of us if you didn't spend the night."

Eren laughed humorlessly. "You say that as if you want to fuck me but are trying not to."

Levi blinked – was Eren being perceptive or sarcastic? For a moment, he could do nothing but stare at Eren, dumbfounded, but that lingering moment of silence was a dead giveaway. By the time he realized it, the damage had been done; he may as well have said the words himself.

"Oh my god…" Eren whispered. His eyes widened and his posture stiffened as he took a step away from Levi.

Levi's eyes hardened – they turned as cold as ice as he glared at Eren with irrefutable disgust in them. "Don't be fucking ridiculous." He pushed himself off the wall and marched towards the front door, opening it with significantly more force than was required before glaring back at Eren with unadulterated hate in his eyes. "Go."

* * *

 **Thanks for sticking around. I'll push to get some more work out before 2017 comes and destroys me as well.**

 **OS**


	11. Chapter 11: Nothing to Lose

**A/N: Next.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

The drive home was agonizing. It couldn't have been more than fifteen minutes but it felt like hours as Eren crumbled. As if every single cell in his body combusted independently, burnt to a crisp and then floated up into the abyssal darkness of the cab, so Eren fell apart. The streetlights desperately trying to penetrate the snug darkness around him looked like nothing more than the incinerated remnants of his own being blurring around him as his tear-filled eyes failed to focus on the world around him. And the ache inside…oh, the ache was unbearable. There was an emptiness deep in his chest that felt like a black hole sucking in all around it, sucking and consuming but never satisfied. This emptiness threatened to take in the brunette's very form, causing him to double over in the backseat and claw at his chest as if trying to fight the overwhelming gravity pulling him into nothingness.

Was he being dramatic? Of course he was. Eren knew this. He knew that the pain he felt was completely invalid, he knew that the ache, the longing, the emptiness was all for naught. He knew that there was no logical reason for him to feel this way – he had said something highly inappropriate out of his own accord, and this was simply the consequence thereof. It was _he_ who misconstrued a silence that obviously existed out of awe; awe for the brashness and inappropriateness of a young man who crossed the boundary between sensei and student, awe for the complete disrespect of and disregard for the fact that he and Levi were not friends, merely acquaintances. He himself, Eren Yeager, had spoken out of turn. Levi's hostility was warranted. Yet despite this, despite knowing that this feeling was entirely unnecessary, dramatic and quite frankly, pathetic, why was he drowning in it so?

When he finally arrived at his home, Eren stayed outside. He was frozen, drawn to the deep dark of the night as if it provided relief from the overwhelming darkness consuming him inside. He stayed in the parking lot, reliving the harrowing seconds wherein Levi kicked him out like a dog who had shit on an expensive rug. The hatred and disgust in Levi's eyes was putrid; for a moment, Eren genuinely feared for his safety. He could not leave fast enough – he all but ran from the apartment building, putting some distance between him and the complex before daring to call an Uber. And the entire time he ran, those cold, steely eyes bore into the back of his mind. The threat of violence and pain in the icy grays imprinted in Eren's mind, following his every step and threatening to follow him even as he slept. Those eyes would forever haunt the brunette; the eyes of the devil itself.

How had he ruined an opportunity to spend the night at Levi Ackerman's apartment? How had he taken such a rare opportunity and thrown it to the ground, trampling on it and taking a piss on it just for good measure? Just as he was about to berate himself for the hundredth time, for the first time he remembered what had lead up to that moment. Yes, he may have spoken out of turn. Yes, he may have incited the wrath of hell within Levi with his loose tongue. But no, he was not the one who had ruined the night.

When he had gotten into the shower, Levi wanted nothing more than the brunette's speedy recovery. When he had left the shower, Levi was sitting across from the bathroom door muttering about the need to get rid of 'the brat'.

Something had happened in those fifteen minutes that had not only changed Levi's mind, but the man's entire demeanor. He had gone from caring and affectionate (as much as Levi could be) to cold and irritable, and thereafter even becoming rash and nonsensical. Something had happened, while Eren was in the shower, that had Levi's mind in entropy. Eren may not know Levi well, but the flustered 'go, don't leave' display he had seen did not fit with the man's character at all. Something had Levi confused, conflicted even. What could it have been?

Eren sighed. The night was dark, and the parking area in which he sat was eerie at best. There were few lights around, and the darkness between the dozens of cars scattered about could hold anything. Crickets chirped in the night and other insects sang their own songs in search of a mate, or companionship, whatever it is they sought, and the chorus created by the nightlife was all that warded off the frightfulness that came with being alone and exposed in such darkness. Those sounds were all that made the night pleasant.

Eventually, the empty ache subsided. The pain, longing and humiliation were all eventually replaced with curiosity, and that curiosity eventually faltered as well. Would Eren ever know what was going on in Levi's mind in the moments leading up to his leaving? Would Eren ever know what had happened in those fifteen minutes while he was in the shower?

Yes, he would. He damn well would find out! At the very least, he deserved an explanation, and Levi's excuse was piss-poor at best. Even if it was a personal matter, Eren would get to the bottom of it. A personal matter simply didn't make sense – a personal matter couldn't possibly have developed in fifteen minutes. A personal matter would have been there before Eren had arrived. A personal matter…Eren growled as he reached for his phone in his pocket, boldly scrolling down to the contact saved only as 'L'. He stared at it for a moment, and before any doubt could cross his mind, he hit dial.

The phone rang once. Twice. Three times. It continued ringing and ringing, and the longer Eren listened to that bland tone, the more determined he felt to get to the truth. His grip on his phone tightened and his breathing became heavier as irritation crept in under his skin. He wanted answers, damn it! When the call when through to voicemail, Eren promptly hung up and cussed angrily under his breath before redialing. He would get to the bottom of this, even if he had to call Levi fifty times.

"What."

If Eren's determination was a single ice-cube, Levi's hiss was the ten-pound hammer that shattered that cube. Suddenly, all the guts Eren had moments ago pooled beneath him and evaporated into nothingness, and all that was left inside was fear and uncertainty. Only now had he noticed that his heart was hammering in his throat and his hands were trembling. Only now did he realize that he actually had no idea what to say to the man.

"What the fuck do you want, Yeager?" Levi said.

Of course his tongue would betray him. It always did. It said things it wasn't supposed to at inappropriate times, and the one time Eren needed that loose-headedness of his least controllable appendage, it failed him.

"I don't have time for this," Levi growled, and a shuffle followed.

"Levi!" Eren called out, knowing the man was about to hang up.

Yet again, Levi growled into the receiver, sounding angrier than before. "Speak, Yeager."

"I…" Eren drew a deep breath. It was now or never. In any event, what was the worst that could happen? Levi would hang up on him. Hate him. The man probably hated him already. With this in mind, Eren steeled himself to confront Levi. "Why did you kick me out?"

Levi sighed heavily. The irritation in the man's voice was tangible, enough so to have Eren back away, but the young brunette balled his free hand into a fist and forced himself to relent. He had come this far, he would not back down now.

"I told you…" Levi started, but just the assumption of the words to follow had Eren snapping at the man before he could finish.

"Bullshit!" Eren snapped. "You were more than cool to have me over before I showered, but afterwards you couldn't get me out of your house fast enough. What happened?"

Silence. It reminded Eren of the silence that he had so horribly misconstrued, the silence that lead to the words that angered Levi more than Eren had ever seen the man enraged. For a drawn out moment, there was absolutely nothing. It stretched on for so long, in fact, that Eren very nearly called out to Levi just to see if the man was still there. But he waited, albeit impatiently, for the man's reply.

Eventually, Levi spoke. "Send me your location. I'm coming to you."

Blinking, Eren ripped his phone from his ear and eyed it in utter mortification before pressing it back to his ear. "What?"

"Are you deaf?"

Was Levi really going to come to him? "Why?"

The man on the other end breathed out harshly between clenched teeth, but Eren was too far gone in shock to pay any attention to Levi's obvious irritation. "Fine. Then I won't come."

"No, come!" Eren cried out. His desperate outburst shattered the silence of the night, and suddenly the brunette felt incredibly self-conscious. He looked around and was relieved that no one had heard him. Lowering his voice, he said, "I'll send it to you."

"I'll be there in a few minutes."

With that, Levi terminated the conversation. Eren lowered his phone from his ear and stared at it for a minute before remembering that he actually had to send his location to Levi before the man would come. But why did he want to come? Was Levi actually going to answer Eren's questions? The brunette's mind was in a whirlwind of 'whys' and 'what ifs' as he raced into his apartment, remembering that he was still wearing dirty clothes that absolutely repulsed Levi. It would take the man at least ten minutes to make the trip – Eren had time for a quick shower and a change of clothes.

* * *

As soon as Eren left, Levi regretted it. He regretted his harshness, he regretted telling Eren to leave, and he regretted even having brought the brat home in the first place. It was never a good idea to have Eren that close – Eren was his weakness. Eren was the one who reduced him to a primal lustful state. Having Eren in his home was a bad idea from the beginning, and as he stood with his back to the door, Levi fiercely berated himself for even having invited Eren over in the first place.

But as he did this, a part of Levi wondered where the sin in that desire was. It was not as if he acted upon it, even though the thought and the temptation had crossed his mind. And even if he had, what was so wrong about proposing a casual relationship wherein both men would get what they wanted? Was it so appalling to entertain their mutual desire? Would acting upon that desire really turn Levi into the type of man he loathed, if it was mutual?

Yes.

Because if he pursued that, if he initiated relations with Eren and they ended up in bed together, he would be objectifying the brunette. Even if the feeling was mutual, it would not be a relationship born out of respect and emotional desire, but rather a fleeting confluence of two raw creatures who want nothing from the other but the base primal need that animals have of one another. It would be lustful, raw, and while Levi had no doubt it would be passionate and quite frankly mind-blowing, he did not want to associate with being a hormone-driven, sex-focused man. Eren may still be alright with that, but Levi…no. He would not treat another human being as an object to get off on, get off with, again. Even if it was mutual, even if that person may treat him the same or even worse, Levi would not put himself in that position.

It was best that Eren left. But then again, it would have been better if Eren never had come in the first place.

Levi sighed heavily and ran his fingers through his hair for what felt like the millionth time that night. There was still a part of him that wondered if he and Eren could be more than just fuck buddies. But that part of him was quickly silenced by the stark reminder of how Eren stripped him of the control he so prided himself on having. He would never be able to be the Dominant, Master or Owner of someone who made him act and feel like just a man. He did not want to be _just_ a man, but rather that Dominant, Master or Owner. And without control, without discipline, those roles could not exist.

Looking down at his own hands, Levi watched as his fingers curled in on one another one by one until both his hands were balled into fists. What he saw as he looked at them was power. He saw authority. He saw control. He saw tools of satisfaction, tools of domination. He saw implements to deliver compassion, care, tenderness and even love. He saw perfection. But what he also saw was a means to domineer. He saw crudeness, a way to simply get off, things to grab and take what he desired, what he felt may belong to him. What he saw when he looked at his hands was absolute power.

These hands could make or break somebody. They could bring a person to new heights or pleasure, or they could tear that person down and reduce them to absolutely nothing. These two appendages could make somebody love Levi, it could make somebody hate Levi, but more so than that, they could make the man either love or hate himself.

Sighing yet again, Levi relaxed his posture. He leaned his head back against the door and looked at the ceiling as if it held the answers to life's greatest questions. He stated at the bland white boards as thoughts of how his life was changing flitted through his mind.

Petra was leaving him. It would probably be a matter of time before Isabel decided she didn't need him anymore. Without those two women, Levi was nothing but a man. There was nothing more to his life than just the motions of existing. Without them, he had no control, he had no one to please, no one to serve, no one to dominate and no one to care for. If Isabel were to walk away as well, Levi would be left with absolutely nothing.

At thirty years old, did he really want that? Being single at thirty was probably not the worst thing – hell, he could have been forty and still single – but Levi would be lying if he said the loneliness of going through life alone didn't eat at him sometimes. Even though he liked his space and lacked the patience to be with another human being, he had to admit that he craved that closeness. Perhaps it really had come to the point where he had to consider opening himself up to another person.

Eren? Levi scoffed at this. What could that young brat possibly offer him outside of sex and perhaps, if he could get himself under control, some playtime? Eren was too young to be a suitable companion, too carefree, and too immature. Or was he? Was Eren really these things, or was Levi just assuming so? Thinking about it, he didn't really know Eren all that well.

Just then, Levi's phone rang. He knew it was Eren. Eren would obviously be hurt, possibly angry, and would undoubtedly demand answers. Answers that Levi did not feel inclined to give. Nevertheless, he walked up to his phone on the kitchen counter and stared at it as it rang, its vibrations against the granite counter top significantly louder than the generic ringtone. Why did phones even need ringtones, or even alarms, Levi mused. He couldn't remember the last time he had woken up to the sound of his actual alarm; the phone's vibrations shattered the calm of the morning every morning. In fact, Levi couldn't even remember what his morning alarm sounded like.

And then the phone stopped ringing. It had undoubtedly gone to voicemail. Levi was about to tell himself that Eren would likely call again, but before he could even finish that thought, his phone was ringing. As if on instinct, Levi answered the call, and when he realized he had, a deep flash of irritation sparked within him. Now he _had_ to talk to Eren, something he didn't want to do.

"What."

Silence. It stretched on as the seconds ticked by, seconds wherein Levi's irritation only grew.

"What the fuck do you want, Yeager?"

Levi could hear Eren breathing on the other end of the line. The brat's breath sounded heavy and shaky; Eren sounded afraid. It quelled Levi's irritation some. He waited, giving Eren time, but the man said nothing. Eren's breaths only grew heavier, and listening carefully, Levi could hear very hushed grunts of frustration. Eren wanted to speak, but obviously had no words to say.

A beep in the call notified Levi that it had been a minute; a minute of listening to Eren's breath breaking an otherwise unnecessary silence. A minute wasted, a minute that Levi did not want to spend in this way. And so the previous irritation returned.

"I don't have time for this," he growled, pulling his phone away from his ear to end the call.

"Levi!" Eren called out, his voice cracking slightly.

Levi sighed. "Speak, Yeager."

"I…" Eren started speaking, seemingly desperate to keep Levi on the line. But after that single word, that silence returned. Levi was about to lash out yet again when Eren drew a deep breath, and in a strong voice, asked, "Why did you kick me out?"

Of course. Levi had expected this. He sighed and said, "I told you…" But before he could finish, Eren snapped at him, anger thick in his voice.

"Bullshit! You were more than cool to have me over before I showered, but afterwards you couldn't get me out of your house fast enough. What happened?"

Levi had not imagined that Eren would talk to him in that manner. For a second, he stood stunned. And in that second, it became clear to him that Eren was not going to give up, that the brunette wanted answers and would likely stop at nothing to get them. After all, the man Eren wanted had acted brashly towards him; he was likely hurt and confused.

Levi sighed quietly. It would be cruel and unethical to leave Eren hanging like this. It would be cowardly to back away. If anything, Eren deserved the truth. Besides, what harm could it do?

" _You deserve a little bit of happiness too, Levi."_

Isabel's words played in Levi's mind as he formulated his reply to Eren. Maybe, just maybe, Eren could give him some happiness?

Eventually, Levi said, "Send me your location. I'm coming to you."

He had absolutely nothing to lose. Eren wanted him, that was a given, and if he could admit that he wanted Eren too, perhaps he could get to know the brunette a little better. Perhaps Eren wasn't as immature as he thought. Perhaps he and Eren were more compatible that he'd assumed. Perhaps, if he got to know Eren a little better, he would learn how to control himself around the brunette.

* * *

 **Thanks for the read.**

 **OS**


	12. Chapter 12: Unspoken Confession

**A/N: The update frequency is going to be terrible due to work. Thanks for the ongoing support. Hopefully the project won't be scrapped.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this work.**

* * *

The foul memory of Levi's expression before being kicked out of the man's apartment resonated in Eren's mind as he made his way to the parking lot to meet Levi. Each blink of his eyes brought back the image of Levi glaring at him – he relived the hatred and the coldness in a gaze so deadly it had the hairs at the back of his neck on edge. Levi was known for his lethal glares in the ring, but never before had Eren seen the man look _that_ deadly. For a fleeting second, while fleeing like a dog that had pissed in the master's house, Eren did worry for his safety. For a fleeting second, Eren was afraid for his life.

Taking a deep breath as he made his way through the dark parking lot to the complex gate, Eren sternly reminded himself that Levi was not that type of man. Levi was not the kind of man to let someone else's words drive him to doing something that would end his career and ruin his life. If there was one thing Levi very openly prided himself on, it was his high level of discipline, obedience and self-control. That showed in the way he ran his dojo, and the way the fighters there were trained. It showed in everything the man did, and it was one of the reasons Eren idolized the fighter so.

As Eren pressed the button on the remote to open the gate, he wondered what would happen next. He watched as Levi drove to the furthest parking bay in the already desolate visitor's parking lot, and he wondered just what he was going to say to the man. He had phoned with such determination, but that had all burnt away. All that remained of that fire was dying embers. He did not know what to say to Levi. He did not know what to expect from Levi.

When Eren came to stand beside Levi's car, he found the window already down. Levi was waiting with his usual bored expression fixed on his face, which consoled Eren – it was not irritation or anger in the man's eyes. Levi was not here to argue. It was not much, but the consolation was enough to give Eren the courage to speak to the man.

"Hi," Eren said. Levi nodded his head once in acknowledgement; as cold as ever. Eren shifted in place as he stood a meter away from the car, looking around. Suddenly the darkness of the night was endless; suddenly he felt incredibly small and alone, drowning in an abyss as a predator stalked forth, cornering him. "Would you uh…would you like to come inside?"

 _Bad choice of words!_ Eren growled out mentally while trying desperately to fight the blush threatening to brighten his cheeks. Now was not the time for him to be thinking of innuendo, and while he knew there was no way Levi would see those seemingly innocent words in that perverted light, Eren's incessant fantasizing about the man doing just _that_ wasn't making him feel any better.

Levi exhaled – not forcefully, but with more intent than just normal expiration. "No," he said, before lifting his eyes to meet Eren's. "It's best we talk outside."

Of course Levi wouldn't want to be alone in an apartment with someone who had blatantly accused him of wanting to fuck them. Eren wanted to kick himself as the situation dawned upon him.

Eren nodded. "Sure."

The words were at the tip of Eren's tongue. He wanted to blurt them out; he wanted to demand answers as boldly as he did on the phone, but the congregation of words, accusations and questions balled up in his mouth. He couldn't spit them out – facing Levi, Eren had no phone to hide behind. Facing Levi, Eren would be subjected to the man's icy glares. Hateful words over a phone would sting, but hateful words coming from his idol as those steel-grey eyes bore into his own would be damning. Eren did not know what to say. He did not know where to begin.

"Let me ask you something, Yeager." Levi stepped out of the vehicle, and as if on instinct, Eren took a step back. Eren may have imagined it, but a light crease seemed to form between the man's brows as if he were scowling ever so slightly. "What do you want from me?"

That was unexpected. Eren stared at Levi for a moment as the man's question replayed in his mind. As he turned those words over again and again, he realized that despite Levi's trip, the man was not here to answer Eren's question; Levi was here to ask questions of his own. This assumption had the brunette instantly agitated – how dare Levi not only mistreat him by kicking him out of the house like a bad dog, but then also tease him like a starving pup? And all on the same night. That would not do.

"You can't answer my question with a question!" Eren growled out. For the first time since Levi had arrived, Eren felt brave. He felt like he could challenge the man, and the anger simmering beneath his skin fuelled his confidence.

Raising a brow at Eren, Levi simply crossed his arms over his chest and glared at Eren with eyes so condescending the brunette felt like a little boy before his disappointed father. He felt belittled and emasculated, and even though he was noticeably taller than Levi, he felt like absolutely nothing before the man. This worthless feeling both frightened and pissed Eren off, and as if the glare hadn't driven the point home, Levi's next words, spoken in a tone so cold the very air around them seemed to cool, reiterated to Eren that Levi was the one in charge.

"I can do whatever the fuck I want, brat."

A moment of silence followed. Eren's anger began to dissipate as Levi's lingering glare made the brunette feel ever smaller and weaker with each passing second. There was a clear challenge in Levi's eyes, but within those orbs was also a promise of hell should that challenge be accepted. Despite himself, Eren chose to remain silent, unable to even formulate a single word let alone challenge the older man.

When Eren said nothing, Levi said, "I will answer your question after you answer mine."

The man's tone was softer, and the hardened gaze held a hint of sincerity. It was enough to coerce Eren into agreeing – the brunette nodded stiffly as he immediately set his mind to conjuring up an answer. While a part of him wanted to thumb-suck an answer just for the sake of it, another part of him wanted to give Levi a decent answer. Not only because he didn't want to appear to his idol as an absolute idiot, but also because there was something at the back of his mind that was warning him that Levi would not easily accept an answer, especially given the stakes.

After putting his mind to it, Eren concluded that what he wanted from Levi was exactly what he was getting. He had admired the man for years, been an avid follower to the point of signing up at Levi's dojo despite it being pricier and by far stricter than any of the other dojos Eren had enquired at when he first became interested in fighting. He idolized Levi, and while there was that lustful part of him that dreamt of being with the man, the greater part of him wanted to be just like Levi. Eren wanted to be as good a fighter as Levi, as frightening, as powerful, as intimidating and as devastating. Eren dreamed of becoming a legend like Levi, and eventually surpassing the man.

"I want you to train me to be a better fighter," Eren said.

Levi was shaking his head before Eren had even finished his sentence, but before the brunette could question this, the man said, "That is what you want from my services. I'm asking what you want from _me_. What do you want from Levi Ackerman, as a person?"

Now that changed things. Eren could feel his cheeks heat up slightly, and he prayed to whatever god was listening that the blush was not visible in the darkness, as he thought of what he wanted from Levi Ackerman as a person. The first thing that came to Eren's mind was, of course, a good fuck. Or a dozen. What person attracted to men did not want the legend in bed with them? Of course this wasn't something he could openly admit to Levi – the brunette turned away and found himself suddenly interested in the darkness surrounding them. As he peered into the unending abyss, he remembered that tonight he had actually desired Levi in a way deeper than just lustfully. He had actually imagined them _together_.

"I don't know," Eren eventually said. The lie was as obvious as the dark of the night, but he didn't care. He could not answer that question truthfully, and he would rather tell the lie he had than make up a story that he would potentially be questioned about. Besides, he was no good at lying, and he knew that well.

"You have to want something from me," Levi said. The man's tone was insistent, almost impatient. "If you didn't, you wouldn't have come home with me."

Those words caused the blush Eren had so desperately tried hiding to explode across his cheeks. Yet instead of staying turned away, the loose-tongued brunette turned to Levi with a furious retort of, "If you didn't want something from me, you would never have invited me to your house in the first place!"

Levi smirked. It was a cocky, knowing smirk that was so out of place that it doused Eren's sudden fury like a tsunami consuming a beach.

"Touché," Levi said.

Eren sighed before tilting his head back and looking up at the night sky. There weren't many stars out, but that was not unusual for a large city. He was just happy to be able to see the evening star – it reminded him of his angst-filled teenage years where insomnia held him in its grasp, and he'd spend hours staring out of his bedroom window wondering if the star he was looking at even still existed. He'd heard once that many stars visible to those on earth had already died, but the light was travelling so far that the star could still be seen. Many stars were nothing but echoes of light, the remnants of something that no longer existed.

"Put it this way," Levi said, and Eren almost wanted to roll his eyes at the man's persistence. He idly wondered if he came across like this. Possibly, he quickly concluded, just with exponentially less tact. "If you were to spend a day with me, what would you hope to achieve at the end of that day?"

 _A kiss. Another day together. A date. Your number. For you to take me home. Fuck me? Be mine?_

The brunette's emerald eyes fell from the sky and met with Levi's. This time, however, there was no challenge or even question in them. In fact, there was absolutely nothing in Eren Yeager's eyes. They were dead. Resignation was etched in those orbs. He stared at Levi as his thoughts bombarded his mind, surprised yet relieved that not a single one slipped through his lips. Not a single thought, save for the very last one that flitted through this mind.

"What do you care?"

Those words seemed to steal the very light around them. They hung heavily in the air, suffocating the two men as the world around them seemed to fall to darkness. Levi stared at Eren, seemingly unable to speak, and had Eren been any perkier, he would have reveled in the fact that he had tongue-tied the witty Levi Ackerman. Yet instead, Eren just stared at the man, waiting. He stared at Levi, waiting for an answer, but not expecting one. And, as expected, none came. The silence between them stretched on; it felt like days had passed before Eren eventually shuffled in place and turned away from the vehicle.

"I have to get going. I have class tomorrow morning."

It was a lie, and it was painfully obvious, but Eren did not care. He simply did not want to be in this position anymore. He was tired of this conversation. Even though it was his one chance to admit the truth, he knew that doing so would have repercussions that could crush his dreams. He no longer wanted to speak to Levi, because what he wanted to say would ruin the precarious relationship they had formed.

"I'll open the gate for you," Eren said, before walking towards the complex gate.

"I didn't want you to go home," Levi said.

Those words caused Eren to pause mid-step, but instead of turn to face the man, he stood with his back to Levi. Despite this, Levi had Eren's undivided attention. The brunette's heart had begun galloping in his chest as anticipation filled him, and he had to fight with every ounce of willpower within him not to turn to Levi and beg the man to continue. Eventually, his perseverance paid off, and Levi continued speaking.

"I wanted you to stay but I couldn't afford to do so knowing how you feel about me."

That had Eren's heart hammering in his chest for a different reason. How could Levi possibly know how he felt? He had done nothing to indicate any interest, and he had definitely not done anything to showcase his lust. Levi had no grounds supporting those words, and Eren knew that as long as he remained quiet, it was all speculation. Or so he thought, until Levi's next words shattered the illusion that his lusts were contained.

"I heard you in my shower. I heard you calling my name."

The hammering of the young man's heart now felt like the pounding of a thousand bison in his chest. His lips and fingertips began to tingle and the very blood in his veins turned to acid as it raced through his body. Every nerve-ending on his body suddenly became so hypersensitive, it was as if he could feel the pressure of the air pressing against his skin. His body had frozen, along with his mind – it had screeched to a halt, and every thought, even the unconscious drive to breathe had come to a standstill. Eren waited with bated breath for Levi to continue.

"What would have happened if you had stayed?" Levi asked.

At this, Eren turned around. His eyes were furious and that anger was evident in the harsh tone with which he said, "Do you really think I would be stupid enough to try anything?"

Levi's lip twitched in agitation before his brows drew together, and that hateful glare Eren had so feared came his way again. Only this time, Eren did not retreat. He stood his ground and glared right back at Levi, but the fire in his own eyes was instantly doused when the man said, "It was not you I was worried about."

Eren stared at Levi. All anger had vanished, all his determination obliterated. The implication behind the man's words was blatantly obvious, but Eren bit onto his tongue lest that wretched thing betray him again.

"Let me go home," Levi said, turning and opening his car's door. "You have class tomorrow morning."

"Wait!" Eren cried out, but it was too late. Levi had already gotten into the car and started its engine.

It felt like déjà vu. It felt like just the other day when he was begging Jean not to drive away, only this time he had not been shamelessly used. Even though he felt pathetic for begging, Eren swallowed his pride and ran to Levi's window, tapping on it furiously.

"What do you mean?" Eren asked. Levi ignored him flat. "Levi? Hey! Come on!"

Levi said nothing. He revved his car once as warning – it was a warning Eren understood well. Heeding it, he took a step back, allowing the man space to drive away. This time, Eren knew not to follow. This had happened to him so many times before that he knew the outcome already; if he ran, he would only end up tired _and_ rejected. Watching the man drive off, at least he would be spared the fatigue, and what little may be left of his dignity.

He opened the gate from where he stood. He watched as Levi barely even slowed the car down before racing through the gate and disappearing into the night. He watched the gate close as the man of his dreams and his idol vanished, possibly from his life. He stood for a long moment and stared at the gate as he wondered if he would ever have the privilege of training with Levi again.

* * *

 **Thank you.**

 **OS**


	13. Chapter 13: Eight Hours

**Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

He expected a call. In fact, he expected relentless calling. At the very least, he expected a bratty text demanding answers. But as the minutes turned to hours and midnight fast approached, not a single call or text had come through from the brunette. There was no demanding, no begging, no anger and no frustration. There was absolutely nothing.

What was going on in Eren's mind? Levi had all but admitted to Eren that he wanted him, and Eren very obviously had something to say about that, but Levi denied him the chance to speak. Levi, like a coward, drove away. He did not want to hear what Eren had to say because he was afraid; he was afraid of the questions, of the inevitable seeking of clarity, of what would happen next. He was afraid of what Eren would say, of what Eren would ask, and most of all, he was afraid of what Eren would want.

Levi was afraid to face the consequences of yet another crucial slip of self-control.

Because of that, he left. Because of his own inability to man the fuck up, he drove away. He treated Eren the same way that that smug Kirstein had; he had left Eren alone in a parking lot with unanswered questions. Levi had devolved to the kind of man that he loathed, the kind of man that was only concerned with himself and did not care how he made others feel.

A hiss of frustration slipped from between Levi's lips as he lay in bed and stared at the ceiling. He remembered how angry he had felt when he saw Kirstein drive away from Eren like that – now he had done the same thing. Had he made Eren feel the same way? The mere thought of that made Levi sick to his core. What he had done was selfish and quite frankly unnecessary, and despite his cowardice, it would be immature and downright cruel of him to leave the situation be.

The man reached for his phone in the dark, wondering what he would say. He wondered if Eren would even answer his call. The late hour was enough to convince him to abandon his quest, but the ill feeling churning in his gut had him press on. He would not be likened to that disgusting pig Kirstein, and Levi would be damned if he made Eren feel the same way that self-centred prick did. He was better than that; he was a better man.

He called Eren. He lay in bed with his phone on his chest, speaker on, and listened as the echoes of the ringing obliterated the silence of the night. It rang, and rang, and rang, and after what felt like an eternity, just as Levi thought the call would be put through to voicemail, a very sleepy "hello" cracked through the line.

Levi's heart was pounding in his chest. He felt as though he had no right to be contacting the brunette. He had no idea what to say. All he knew was that tonight he had fucked up, and he had to do something, _anything_ , to make it right. Tonight, he had acted like an immature, self-centred coward, and it was quite frankly unethical to have Eren suffer because of his own inability to process his own thoughts and emotions.

"Eren, I'm sorry."

He had not expected those words to come from his mouth. Levi was by no means an apologetic person, and in fact, apologies very seldom came from his lips. Whether due to pride or stubbornness, Levi very, very rarely said those words. It was a surprise to him to hear them in his own voice, but as the awkward silence crackled on, Levi felt as though they weren't nearly enough.

"Eren?" he tentatively called out after nearly a minute of silence.

"What do you want me to say?" Eren asked. He sounded cold and detached, and that emotionless flatness in his voice had Levi feeling eerily uneasy.

"I don't know," Levi answered honestly. He had no expectations. He had not even known what to say to Eren, never mind where he expected the conversation to go after that.

"It's late, Levi. I need to go."

Levi sighed. "I just wanted to say that."

"Say what?"

"I'm sorry."

Silence. It was so deep that Levi could hear the blood rushing through the vessels in his ears. It sounded like a hurricane was tearing him up on the inside, with thunder rumbling in his chest as his heart pounded against his sternum.

Eventually, Eren sighed. "Yeah, okay."

What now?

"Uhm…" Levi scowled as he desperately searched for something to say. Anything. The weight of the silence was suffocating. "Did I wake you?"

"No," Eren answered softly. "I was having a hard time getting to sleep."

"Something on your mind?"

Eren scoffed. "What do you care?"

That hurt. Levi's brows furrowed together as his stomach tied itself into a knot and his lungs spontaneously gained a hundred pounds and were weighing down on his chest, constricting his trachea and preventing any air from passing through his lips.

"Look, Levi," Eren said before sighing heavily. "It's cool that you called, but I'm tired. I'm going to sleep now. Goodnight."

Before Levi could respond, the call ended. Left in deafening silence, Levi stared at his phone until the backlight faded and the abyssal darkness of the night descended upon him. Was he offended by Eren hanging up? No. Perhaps a little irked? Not even slightly. He was, however, deeply surprised that this cold, detached person was the very same one whose warmth Levi had fantasized about. It was shocking, and not necessarily in a bad way, that Eren Yeager could be so inhuman.

It was interesting. It was intriguing. It showed Levi that there was more to Eren he had initially thought. And despite the gravity of the situation, it left the man even more intrigued, and dare he say, more wanting of the young brunette.

* * *

The day went by in a blur. When Eren had told Levi he had class in the morning, it was a lie. He had nothing to do; he did not even have a shift at Smith's that day. With absolutely nothing to do, he stayed in bed until well past lunch time, periodically contemplating whether he would bother showing up for training at the dojo.

With how his body felt like he'd been run over by an eighteen-wheeler, he was strongly leaning towards spending the rest of his day in bed.

In addition to that, he did not want to see Levi. He had lost hours of precious sleep because of the not-so-ambiguous statement the man had made, all but advertising his interest in Eren before rudely leaving. While at the time Eren wanted nothing more than answers – and still would like them – he was not going to run after Levi. He was not going to put himself in the same position that he found himself in with Jean time and again. Jean, he loved. Levi, he lusted after. He would not grovel for a man he simply wanted to bed.

After wasting away in bed for most of the day, Eren eventually decided it was time to shower. When he stood up, however, he was greeted by a very familiar sight; his boxers flared out in front of him as a particular rigid part of him pressed against the cool satin. There was no need, no desire, and very little ache that came with it – it was as if his body had simply pumped blood to that part for absolutely no reason. It was for that exact lack of reason that Eren decided to continue with his routine instead of entertain what could very quickly become dirty fantasies.

Although, standing in the shower, Eren stared at his rigid flesh as the water cascaded down around him. As he stared, he wondered how it was possible that a man could be controlled by something so menial. It was a single body part but it could rule a man with a fist heavier than that of Hitler over the Nazi Regime. It was only one body part, but it was the single thing that could tear a man's sanity apart and rip his rationality to shreds.

Had it not been for that part, none of this would have happened.

He would never have wanted Jean. He would never have fallen in love with Jean and eventually had his heart ripped to shreds by him. He would not run after Jean time and again, only to be used and cast aside and hurt even more every single time. He would not have lusted after Levi, not have ended up jerking off to thoughts of Levi in the man's shower – thinking back now, Eren wanted to punch himself for doing something so reckless and stupid – and he would not have, once again, ended up hurt and confused.

Had it not been for that part, he wouldn't be in this wretched situation.

Sighing, he decided to leave that part be. If that was the thing that was continuously getting him into situations leaving him hurt and confused, he would refuse to entertain it. Eventually, the incessant lusting would stop…he hoped. Eventually, he would gain enough control over his body, or at least hopefully his mind, to prevent a situation similar to this from ever replaying itself. If he no longer entertained that part and the thoughts that came from the pleasure it promised, he would no longer run after Jean, he would no longer fantasize about Levi, and Eren Yeager could simple be.

Wouldn't that be nice?

After a refreshing shower, Eren struggled against the burning protest of his muscles as he dressed himself before toddling to the kitchen in search of sustenance. He only just realized that he hadn't eaten since before the grueling session with Levi, which was more than eighteen hours ago.

"Hmm," he said to himself, as he perused the contents of every cupboard, the refrigerator and the freezer. "Maybe I'll just order a pizza." Two, in fact. One would not sate the ravenous man.

Just as he reached out for his phone, it started to ring. Looking at the caller ID, Eren expected to see Levi's number flashing across the screen. But upon closer inspection, it turned out that it was not Levi calling, but rather none other than Jean Kirstein.

It took Eren a moment longer than it should have to answer the call. Jean was the last person Eren expected to be calling, and as the man's name lit up the screen, Eren's moment of stunned confusion turned into one of uncertainty. Everything within him was telling him to reject the call, but his heart violently protested – it was Jean Kirstein, his first true love, his first heartbreak. The one that got away. And despite all the pain Jean had put him through, Eren could not turn away. Many called it pathetic, but Eren couldn't help it. He was enslaved by his ex-boyfriend, driven by false hope and bound by his one-sided love.

Eventually, Eren answered the call.

"Hey, Eren," Jean said. He sounded relieved. "How're you?"

This was uncharacteristic of Jean. In all the time Eren had known Jean, he could count on one hand the amount of times the man exchanged pleasantries. Jean was straightforward, and only called or texted when he wanted something or had to communicate a specific thing. He never asked "how are you" or cared for the answer. It was suspicious, at best, and Eren would not be fooled.

"What do you want, Jean?" Eren asked.

"So cold," Jean said with an awkward laugh.

The awkwardness and unease in Jean's voice only had Eren's suspicions grow. "What?"

Jean sighed. "Are you coming to the dojo tonight?"

That was more like Jean. Straightforward. But then again, why would Jean bother asking in advance? If he wanted something from Eren, he would spring it on him without warning. Jean knew it would be easier to get what he wanted that way – with Eren non-expectant, his defences would be lower when Jean struck. Asking in advance would do nothing but lower Jean's chance of a successful encounter. Which, yet again, had Eren's suspicions only deepening.

"Maybe," Eren answered. "Why?"

"I need to talk to you."

Talk? Jean never wanted to talk. The simple statement in itself was so bizarre that it had Eren completely taken aback and unable to respond.

"Eren?" Jean called, after the silence stretched on.

"Talk?" Eren confirmed, his voice cracking as his surprise showed.

"Yeah."

"About what!"

Jean sighed. "Us."

Jean wanting to talk was bizarre. Jean wanting to talk about the forbidden topic of "us?" was downright impossible. They had been apart for months, and not once had Jean even remotely entertained Eren's desperate pleas to talk about "us". Eren had cried before the man, thrown himself to his knees and begged, and he had even nearly gone so far as to lay hands on the man but Jean would not budge. Jean did not care, and never had. What changed?

"Us?" Eren asked.

"Yeah, uh…" Jean stumbled around his words for a moment before eventually saying, "Can we meet after training?"

"Uhm…"

Eren did not know what to say. He had dreamt about this moment for months. All he wanted was to have that talk; his desperation had become such that the talk he desired was not for the sake of reunion, but simply for proper closure. Deep down inside, he was leaping for joy at the prospect of learning what was going on in Jean's mind, but on the surface, his resentment had him aching to deny Jean the light of day.

"Just for a few minutes," Jean said. Eren may have imagined it, but there seemed to be desperation in Jean's voice.

"Sure," Eren said. "But I'm not training today."

"Oh. Why not?"

"I'm in pain."

Jean growled. "That Ackerman fucker really did a number on you, didn't he?"

Jean had always been possessive. Eren had always hated it, but today, for some reason, hearing that aggressive burst of possessiveness made Eren smile. "Yeah."

"Asshole," Jean mumbled. He exhaled sharply before saying, "I'll be at the dojo early tonight so I can come by afterwards, if that's cool?"

Allowing Jean into his home was risky. Despite the loathing he felt towards the man, the attraction and the love he still felt for him was undeniable. Being left alone in a private space with Jean was not a good idea whatsoever. There was only one way the night would end, and Eren was sure Jean had considered that as well.

Could this possibly be a ploy by Jean to bed Eren?

Before Eren could entertain that thought a moment longer, he dismissed it; Jean was not that tactful. If he wanted to fuck, he would simply shamelessly seduce Eren and take what he wanted. He wouldn't go through the trouble of creating this farce. He may be an asshole and a user, but he was not cruel – he wouldn't get Eren's hopes up in this way for no reason.

This was a conversation they needed to have, and one that Jean was, finally, willing to engage in. The logistics should not make Eren weary.

"Sure," Eren said. "What time?"

"After seven."

"Cool. I'll see you then."

"Yeah. Cheers."

Jean hung up then, leaving Eren standing in the kitchen in deafening silence. In eight hours, Eren would finally get answers. In eight hours, he would finally understand what was going on in Jean's mind when he left him so suddenly, so coldly, and also what was going on in his mind time and again watching Eren cry and break down.

Only eight hours.

* * *

 **Thank you for still reading despite the delays.**

 **OS**


	14. Chapter 14: Now or Never

**A/N: This one is a little shorter, but it is long overdue. Hopefully it isn't too bad, because it is completely unedited. Enjoy.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

Eren did not show up for training.

At first, Levi naively thought Eren was late. But as the minutes dragged on that naivety gave way to realization, and within twenty minutes Levi had realized and accepted that Eren would not pitch up for their session today. This realization irked Levi more than it ought to have – of course Eren would not pitch up; not only because his body must be feeling like it'd been trampled by a thousand bison after yesterday's grueling session, but because the of the awkward, and possibly cruel, note that their evening had ended on. If Levi were to be honest, he wouldn't be surprised if Eren never wanted to see him again.

However, that was not how Eren was. Eren had returned to worse.

Balking what would have been a powerful left jab to the punching bag, it dawned upon Levi that he had just likened himself to the very man Eren loathed. Eren had definitely gone running back to worse, but that did not give Levi any right to do any bad unto him. It did not give Levi any leeway – just because Eren would return to one man's garbage, it didn't mean Levi could be garbage too. Just because Eren had gone back to "worse", it didn't mean he could be bad.

Truth be told, when it came to these matters, varying degrees of shit did not exist. If a person hurt someone, or was cruel in any way to another, it was bad regardless of the context. Just because he and Eren barely knew each other, it did not mean that it was any less vile for him to treat Eren the way Jean had.

"Asshole!" Levi growled, before completely aborting the jab and twisting his body to launch a devastating right hook at the inanimate object hanging before him. As his wrapped fist connected with the bag, a very satisfying thud reverberated in the minuscule space between his bag and the body; it very nearly had him grin just a little.

He had to apologize. Even if he expected Eren to come back to him, he was the one who had done wrong and he would have to man up and face the consequences of his actions. If not, did that not make him the same as the scumbag Jean Kirstein, who repeatedly emotionally abused and manipulated Eren and expected Eren to crawl back every time?

With a click of his tongue, Levi stepped back from the bag before launching a flurry of kicks at the inanimate sack, spinning his body around skilfully as he unloaded his frustration onto the bag. Attacking at different heights, angles and intensities, Levi had the bag swinging wildly with the sheer power in his kicks and the overwhelming amount of them raining down on the bag, yet no matter which direction it swung off to, Levi anticipated it and his next attack would always flawlessly land a hit.

After thoroughly exhausting himself with the lethal dance, Levi gave the bag one final jab before stepping back from it. He watched it swing about, its momentum bleeding off until it eventually came to a standstill. Come to think of it, the back weighed as much as he did.

Sighing, Levi made his way to his bag. He would give Eren a call. It was the decent thing to do. Not only that, but now that his feelings, or rather his desires, were out in the open, it should be easier to continue this journey, theoretically. Now that he had all but confessed to wanting Eren, the ball was in Eren's court. What happened now was entirely up to the brunette.

As he swiped his thumb across the screen of his phone to unlock it, he caught sight of none other than Jean Kirstein passing him by. It would have been completely uneventful, and he may have not noticed the man at all, if it had not been for a single word coming from his mouth. A name, rather.

Eren.

Hearing Jean say the name he so loved to say had Levi's undivided attention, but in the few seconds it had taken Jean to walk by, Levi was only able to hear one sentence.

"…be there in twenty minutes with pizza."

Turning to the brunette, Levi then noticed that Jean was impeccably dressed, with that cocky smirk to top it off. Now, assumption may be the mother of all fuck ups, but Levi was willing to bet his entire fortune that Jean was on his way to Eren's house.

The anger and frustration that Levi had so meticulously released on the punching bag returned tenfold, and for a fleeting moment Levi strongly considered walking straight up to Kirstein and forbidding him from seeing Eren. Fortunately, his sanity held him grounded, and before he'd even processed that thought, he realized that he had absolutely no right to do that. Eren was not his, in any way, and after the way he had treated Eren, he did not have the hope of a right to play vigilante.

But that didn't make it any easier to let Jean Kirstein walk away, knowing he was going to the man he wanted.

* * *

The drive to Eren's house was daunting. Never before had Jean traveled this road with sober intentions. The anticipation of what was about to transpire had his stomach twisting painfully, that ache only exacerbated by his hunger that was being teased by the scent of pizza wafting around the car. Swallowing between every breath, Jean soon found his mouth dry. He soon found himself running out of ways to wash down the bile that was slowly creeping up his throat; he found himself out of ways to calm down.

Why was he so afraid, though? It's not like he hadn't seen Eren hundreds of times since they had broken up. It's not like things that shouldn't happen between exes hadn't happened in the past few months. They had seen each other bare and exposed in physical and emotional form, they had been raw to the point where every mask they wore had been stripped from their faces and shattered in unadulterated rage. There was nothing left to hide; each had seen the worst and the ugliest side of the other. Eren had seen Jean's rage to the point where they had nearly gotten physical outside of the ring. Eren had seen so much, nearly everything, but Eren had never seen Jean's heart.

Not in the way he was about to.

At the traffic light one block away from Eren's apartment complex, Jean's car crawled to a standstill despite the traffic light proudly showing its green light. He was not ready. He was not ready to bare himself in this way, to humble himself, and most importantly, he was not ready to admit that he was wrong.

How had he come to this point?

He remembered the conversation he had had with Marco only days earlier. It was a conversation he had hoped to avoid, a conversation that he had avoided many times, but one that Marco had forced upon him after becoming sick of his self-pitying and self-loathing. Bless that man, Jean thought, but curse him all the same.

It was that very conversation where Marco forced Jean to confront himself. Jean faced the painful truth – he loved Eren. Eren used to be his best friend, his greatest irritation, his partner-in-crime, his right-hand-man, someone who he sometimes couldn't stand to be around but always wanted to be. Eren used to infuriate him, but Eren also used to calm him. However, no matter how he needed Eren, Eren's mere presence drove him to the brink of insanity.

What he had done was selfish and unnecessary, and the way in which he had done it was downright cruel. He had justified his actions time and again, saying he was only trying to protect himself. That being any more civilized would have prolonged it, and that would have hurt both Eren and himself.

In hindsight, that was just a load of bullshit.

What he had done to Eren in the months after they had broken up was crueler and hurt Eren more than anything he possibly did when they were still together. What he had done to Eren since he had walked away had done nothing but hurt him. Hurt them both. The last thing he deserved was a second chance, but Marco was right. If Eren was willing to give him that chance, it meant Eren was willing to forgive him.

Marco was right. He didn't deserve to suffer. His self-loathing would destroy him.

Eventually, he drove the last hundred meters. He buzzed Eren and watched in horror as the gate opened up before him. He parked his car as far away from Eren as possible, in an attempt to prolong the walk. Before he had even turned off the engine, his heart was hammering in his throat like that of a boy who was about to touch a girl for the first time. He could feel his fingers trembling as he reached for his door, he could smell the adrenaline pumping through his veins as anxiety suffocated the cabin of the car. He all but choked on it, and all he wanted was another minute. Or five. All he wanted was to gather his thoughts, just one last time.

But he could not. When he glance in his rear-view mirror, he saw Eren approaching the car.

It was now or never.

* * *

 **Thank you.**

 **OS**


	15. Chapter 15: Confronted

**A/N: I should stop apologizing for the delays, it is just a thing. 2017 has not been easy! Anyway, here's the next piece.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

Too much time was spent on pleasantries. Jean had obviously been trying to delay the inevitable by engaging in idle chitchat that Eren had absolutely no interest in. Never before had Jean spoken about his days in such excruciating detail, and had the visit not been so suspicious, Eren may have enjoyed actually being engaged in this way by Jean. However, as Jean spoke, all Eren could think about what the looming conversation to be had, and despite Jean's efforts to converse, all Eren wanted to converse about was the promised "us".

Eventually, the procrastination became too much to bear and Eren asked, "Why are you here, Jean?"

Eren swore he'd asked Jean a question to which there was no answer, one that if answered incorrectly would result in the death of every person he loved. Jean stared at Eren with wide, frightful eyes, mouth slightly agape and lips trembling as if the very weight of the question was straining his mandible. The silence persisted for much longer than Eren had the patience to endure, but despite itching to pry, he knew that what he was seeing before him was akin to a wild animal frozen in panic – one more move and the beast would bound off, disappearing into the underbrush, never to be seen again. So Eren waited as the minutes ticked on, the itch to push causing his toes to curl inside his shoes.

Despite his best efforts, Eren only had so much patience. "Jean?"

As if the sound of his name reanimated him, Jean's posture relaxed as he sighed. He shook his head and drew his brows together in a scowl, his eyes dropping to the floor as he whispered, "I don't know where to begin."

"I know," Eren said, his voice holding a poorly concealed hint of aggression, "why don't you start by telling me why you want to suddenly speak to me about this?"

When Jean answered Eren's question, his voice was so low and so quiet that he sounded like a broken child abandoned by the world. It completely disarmed Eren; he had never heard Jean sound so vulnerable, and so blatantly pitiful.

"I can't take the pain anymore, Eren."

"Pain?" Eren asked.

"Losing you. It's killing me."

The pain in Jean's voice and the longing in his words may have disarmed Eren, but having gone through what he'd gone through only to hear Jean speak in this manner instantly infuriated Eren. His jaw snapped shut and his teeth ground together as his hands balled into fists, the very temperature of his blood seeming to spike as that anger tore through him like a tsunami.

How dare Jean say that? After not only walking away without offering an explanation, but also after the dozens of times he had used and tossed Eren aside, he dare speak like this?

 _No!_ Eren thought, lusting to fulfill his sudden urge to deliver a powerful right hook to Jean's flawless face. He ached to feel the pinch of flesh as his knuckles would drive to connect with Jean's skull, the dull thud of the impact melding harmoniously with the wet slosh of saliva and blood being forced out of Jean's pretty mouth. He had done that before, albeit in the ring, and it was divine. Oh how he wished to do it right now.

But instead of act out the fantasy, Eren called out, "What the fuck!" Before Jean could even inspire to reply, Eren let off. "How dare you fucking say that as if you _lost_ me? You didn't _lose_ me, Jean, you fucking _threw me away_! Everything was going great then suddenly I'm not good enough for you and you toss me out. You threw me out like trash! But even though you treated me like shit, I came back. I _begged_ for you even though I wasn't in the wrong, but you flipped me off every single time." Eren laughed humorlessly, his eyes ablaze as they bore into Jean's with murderous intent. "Nah. You didn't just flip me off. You fucking used me like the disgusting pig you are, giving me hope, leading me on, getting off and then tossing me out again. And again, and again."

Jean turned away from Eren. With his fingers intertwined with one another and pressing against each other so hard they turned white, Jean dropped his eyes with what looked like guilt in them. The remorse looked genuine, but the sight of it made Eren want to both laugh and be sick. It was unfathomable to see such a heartless bastard appear so sickened by his own actions, and while Eren would be lying if he said didn't he loved how pitiful Jean looked, it only fuelled his anger to see such apparent remorse.

Was Jean acting?

"Tell me," Eren said, his voice suddenly eerily calm. "Did you get off on treating me like that?"

Jean's eyes snapped up, glossy and confused. "What? No!"

"Did you like it? Did it turn you on?"

"No!"

"Did you secretly film how you used me and broke my heart every time so you could go home and watch it later and jerk off?"

"Eren, what the fuck?"

"Was I the personification of your sick, sadistic fantasy?"

"Eren, enough!" Jean snapped.

The two men stared at one another, Eren seething in near-psychotic rage and Jean apprehensive yet meeting Eren's glare unafraid. A heavy silence descended upon them, its weight pressing down on the air in the room, seemingly raising the very temperature with its pressure. The silence persisted, neither one daring to break it, as Eren stared at Jean demanding answers – or lusting for blood – while Jean stared right back at Eren, calculating the safest response to the flood that had been unleashed upon him.

"Eren, I fucked up, okay," Jean said. Eren's lips parted, but before he could respond, Jean continued. "I can't take back what I did. Nothing I do will change it or make it better. But I can apologize, and I'm not going to force you to forgive me, but I hope you can."

Hope. What would this soulless bastard know about hope? And what could he possibly hope to achieve in having this apparent hope for forgiveness? All the anger drained from Eren as the truth dawned upon him, the sudden realization seemingly freezing the blood in his veins. It was painfully obvious – why else would Jean want to talk about "us", and confess his pain, his remorse and ultimately ask for forgiveness? There was only one possible reason a man would face his past in this manner – he wanted to make his past his future.

"Why?" Eren asked. Whether he was feigning naivety or hoping for an answer adverse to his deduction, he did not know.

"I…" Jean started, but baulked. He stayed silent for a long while, Eren patiently waiting for him to continue, Eren's fierce eyes _daring_ him to speak. Sighing, Jean manned up to the challenge. "I miss you, Eren. I love you. I need you."

Never in his wildest dreams had Eren imagined he would hear those words coming from Jean's mouth. Not once since they had broken up had Jean given Eren even the slightest indication that he had even ever loved him. Of course Jean had flirted and even charmed Eren to get what he wanted, but not once had he outright said these words. I need you. In fact, Eren wondered if Jean had ever said those words once since they had met.

It may have disarmed Eren, or perhaps given him hope, had his suspicion of Jean's intentions not reached critical point.

"What do you want from me?" Eren asked.

"I want you."

Of course. It was the same thing Jean always wanted. It was the same thing Jean always got, thanks to his cunning use of words and his sickening proficiency in playing Eren's emotions.

"I want you back, Eren."

Eren's eyes snapped up to meet Jean's. Shocked, frozen in place, Eren stared at Jean wide-eyed and anxiously awaiting the punch line. He waited for the "just kidding" or "got ya!" or anything that would end this sick joke. But his awed gaze was met with a look of pure innocence and longing, the look of a man humbled and begging to be made whole again. It was a look Jean had never had in his eyes before, a look Eren had never seen outside of the silver screen.

Jean was not joking.

Eren did not know what to say. Jean was obviously awaiting some sort of a reply, but Eren did not know what to say. He did not know where to even begin. He opened his mouth and shut it, repeating this process several times before sighing as an indication of his surrender. He did not know what to say and he was not going to pretend that he was willing to further fight for words.

"Look, I know you're not going to give me a second chance right away, or ever, but I thought I would just tell you how I feel. I can't go on like this and…" Jean sighed, slowly rising to his feet. "If you would give me the chance, I swear to treat you right. We can work something out."

With that, Jean turned away from Eren and made his way to the front door. Eren, however, was not willing to let Jean leave just yet. The conversation seemed incomplete; no conclusion was reached and Eren did not want Jean to leave until they had cleared the air. There were still too many questions. Why had he left in the first place? Had he been feeling like this all the time? What made him decide to come back?

"Wait, Jean," Eren called out, jumping to his feet.

Jean threw Eren a sideways glance, hands in his pockets and expression back to the hardened set that Eren was used to, but Eren would not be deterred by that. He would get answers! However, just as he opened his mouth to demand Jean stay, his phone started ringing.

Both men looked at Eren's phone. The caller ID flashed proudly on the screen, and as Eren read the name, his mind went blank.

Levi had openly expressed interest in him. The man that he idolized and fantasized about wanted him. He had never ascertained if that was purely sexual interest or more, but he strongly suspected the former. Why would Levi want more, and with someone as inconsequential as Eren? He was certain they had nothing in common. But what if…?

"You should get that," Jean said. "I bet he doesn't like when people don't answer his calls."

Suddenly the urgency to get answers from Jean faded. Eren knew that if he and Jean completely cleared the air, and providing all explanations satisfied Eren's parameters, he was likely to give Jean that second chance. Hell, he wanted nothing more than to reconcile his romance with the first man he'd ever loved. And if Eren took Jean back now, he would never have a chance of whatever it was Levi wanted.

Although he doubted Levi wanted more than a fuck, it was probably not impossible that he wanted more. Eren at least wanted answers to that. Would it not be unhealthy to enter into a relationship with unfinished business with another man? In fact, would it not be unhealthy to enter into a relationship while lusting after another man? Perhaps, just maybe, he could sate himself of his lust for his idol before reconciling his relationship with Jean. After all, it was not every day that someone was presented with the opportunity to sleep with their idol and greatest crush.

And after everything Jean had put him through, he did not care much for how Jean were to feel if he ever found out about his affair with Levi…which would never happen, since he was sure Levi would pay to keep his sexual orientation out of the public eye.

"Yeah," Eren said, smiling awkwardly. He grabbed his phone and looked at it as if he had not seen the caller ID. "Uhm…"

"We'll talk again, I'm done anyway," Jean said with a shrug. "Just uh…think about it and let me know."

"Sure," Eren said.

Jean gave one final nod before slipping out of the front door. The door had barely closed behind Jean and Eren had already answered his phone. "Levi."

"Eren," Levi said, formal as always.

"What's up?" Eren asked. The saga from the previous day was completely forgotten in this moment as Eren found himself caught up in the excitement of trying to decipher what Levi wanted from him and how much he could push for from Levi.

"Where were you tonight?"

"Tonight?" Eren wondered aloud, before realizing what Levi had meant. "Oh, training?" Eren huffed a humorless laugh. "I can barely walk, I don't think I would have made it through a session with you."

Levi clicked his tongue. "Do you not think I would have given you time to recover?"

"Well, you never know."

"I'm not a heartless bastard, Eren," Levi said. "Besides, you wouldn't do very well against Kirstein with an injury."

"Yeah…"

For a moment, Eren had forgotten that he had ended up under Levi's wing with the sole purpose of defeating Jean. With Jean as remorseful as he was, Eren idly wondered if he should still continue along his path of destroying Jean in the ring. Even though it would be great to win against him for once, without the anger and lust for revenge, would it not just be a simple victory and not a show of dominance and superiority?

"Will you be there tomorrow?"

However, if he no longer needed that victory, he no longer needed Levi's training, and that would end the relationship he had built with the man prematurely.

"Definitely," Eren said. He would continue training with Levi, even if it led to a victory that would prove to be exponentially less satisfying if it were over his boyfriend and not his asshole ex. "Same time?"

"Yes."

"Okay cool. See you then. Cheers."

"Eren."

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry about last night."

Eren was about to ask what Levi was referring to, when it all came back to him. The bad joke, being kicked out of Levi's home like a filthy dog, the ambiguous comments left in the air that. How could he have forgotten all that when that was what led up to the realization that Levi may be interested in him? How was it possible that those key events had been pushed so far back in his mind when the outcome of them was what was stopping him from leaping straight into Jean's arms?

"We need to talk about that," Eren said.

Levi snorted. "Sure, brat."

It was obvious that Levi had no intention of talking about it. "I'm not kidding, Levi! I won't continue training with you if you don't talk to me about it."

"Your loss, not mine."

 _Duh_. That was a terrible threat. Eren's mind scrambled to find something to hold over Levi, and as he sifted through the hundreds of facts every fan might know, he remembered he had something in his arsenal that very few, if any, may have.

"I'll tell them you're gay."

"Who?" Levi sounded amused. "And with what evidence?"

An idly part of Eren's mind noted that Levi was not denying that accusation.

"I don't need evidence," Eren threatened. "As a celebrity, you should know just the suspicion will be enough to get published."

Levi growled, "You wouldn't."

"Try me."

It was a bluff. Eren would never do that to Levi. He idolized the man! What kind of a fan would he be if he were the reason for his idol's downfall? There was a special place in hell for those kinds of traitors. Eren could only hope Levi would know deep down inside that he would never make good on his threat, but in the same breath he hoped that Levi took the threat serious enough to want to talk.

"I'll see you tomorrow," Levi snapped, before hanging up.

Of course having the phone slammed down in his ear was irksome, but it told Eren one thing – Levi was worried about his threat. And as long as Levi was worried, there was a chance that Levi would talk…or corner him and make him suffer. Eren could only hope it would be the former – he needed closure on the matter so he could make a decision about Jean.

* * *

 **Thanks for sticking around!**

 **OS**


	16. Chapter 16: Going In

**A/N: I cannot stress how sorry I am for always making you wait! Unfortunately, work has been grinding my ass double time. I have three more chapters written, so I will post them now at regular intervals for the time being. Thank you for being so patient, and thank you for all the kind reviews! You guys rock!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any brands mentioned.**

* * *

Levi's relationship with Isabel was complicated at best. Isabel first came into Levi's life when his friend, Farlan, had expressed interest in the feisty bar-lady at their local watering hole, who's "hair was as flamingly wild as she probably was". Levi had repeatedly told Farlan he didn't stand a chance in hell with that kind of girl, being as bland as he was, but after months of suspiciously generous tips and building up courage through drunken pep-talks with himself in the bathroom mirror, he eventually asked her out.

Her response: "It's about bloody time."

The two hit it off right away, and despite having fewer similarities than Pluto and Mercury, their chemistry was explosive. The redhead had an energy about her that Levi couldn't stomach; quiet nights chatting with Farlan over a couple of beers became long nights out laughing, dancing and drinking shots. It was tiring, but Levi would be damned if he didn't admit that it was fun. Isabel had a youthful exuberance to her that made Levi feel years younger than he was, and as time flew by, he grew more and more attached to the crazy woman.

Nine months after they had met, Farlan proposed to Isabel, and only two months after that, the pair stood at the altar, with Levi as the best man. It was a proud moment.

A year into what Levi deemed the perfect marriage, Farlan had come to Levi in a state. He had learnt something about Isabel, something dark and out of the ordinary, and not only did he not know how to digest it, but he did not know how to approach it. Isabel should have told him her secret sooner, before he'd invested his life in her. Before saying "I do" she should have laid bare the terms and conditions to what would ultimately satisfy her. When Farlan learnt of her masochistic lusts, he broke; the bland man would never be able to satisfy his wife in that way.

Months of arduous negotiations passed. Levi did not want to see the pair doomed, so he offered himself as a solution. Farlan could trust him and he was gay, so he made a risky proposition: _let me satisfy that side of your wife._ It was not easy at first. Hell, the first few times they tried, Isabel and Farlan had fights that damn near ended their marriage. But she was persistent and Levi relented, and eventually Farlan saw that that was what made his woman happy. He figured, why lose her over one thing he couldn't do when he could do the other five thousand things that made her happy?

Of course he tried to do it. He hated it. He went to therapy and found no reprieve. But when he changed his mind set, when he saw Levi's actions as a tool to achieve what he could not, he made peace with the situation and with himself. Eventually, he grew to love it; when the fights stopped, he noticed the change in his beloved. Levi saw it too. And with Isabel shining as radiantly as she did, neither man could deny that this was the best solution.

Levi wanted that kind of love – the kind of love that was selfless. He wanted a partner that he could reason with, that he could understand and that would ultimately understand him as well. He wanted someone he could come home to every day, someone he could bicker with (as irksome as it would be), someone he could relax with, someone to make love to one day and fuck like a depraved beast the next, someone he could sensually entice in a soft play as well as beat the shit out of with a cane. He wanted that, but he knew he was more than likely never destined to find it; it was too much to ask for in one person.

Wrapping up a quick spanking session with the paddle, Levi observed as the euphoric Isabel doted over her husband as if he were the last man alive. The way those emerald eyes peered up at him full of wonder was like that of a child gazing upon their hero, but within that wonder was the unadulterated love of a woman who would take on the world to protect her man. It made him smile, but it made him incredibly jealous as well.

"How about a drink?" Farlan asked.

Usually, when his sessions with Isabel were short, the trio would have a drink or a meal together. It was something they had started doing to help ease Farlan into the arrangement, to reiterate the platonic nature of Levi and Isabel's affairs and to build the romantic relationship between the couple.

Today, however, Levi did not want to do it.

For the first time, he found himself genuinely jealous of the couple. Even though he had always wanted what they had, now that he had a prospective partner, he wanted it even more. And wanting it even more made seeing what he could not have even harder. He knew that spending time with them, even though they were his best friends, would leave him bitter, and he did not want to subject them to that.

"I'll pass," he said.

Both Isabel and Farlan froze; Farlan's arms unwrapped from around Isabel's waist as she stepped away from him. They both stared at Levi for a moment before asking in unison, "Are you okay?"

Levi sighed. He could lie and say yes, but they would see right through him. These were his best friends, and sometimes he thought they knew him better than he knew himself. He could brush it under the rug and avoid the conversation entirely, but that would be for naught; while Farlan might let up, Isabel would persist until Levi confessed. Either way, there was no getting out of the conversation looming ahead.

"I think it's boy troubles," Isabel conspicuously whispered to Farlan while keeping her eyes fixed on Levi.

"Looks like it," Farlan whispered back in the same fashion.

Levi clicked his tongue and shook his head. He loved the pair, but when they stood together, they were formidably irritating.

"I reckon it's Eren," Isabel said.

At the mention of Eren's name, Levi's ears perked up. He only balked for one second, but it was long enough for the pair that had known him well over a decade to know that they had hit the nail on the head.

"Definitely Eren," Farlan said with a smirk.

Isabel placed her hands on her hips. "Have you not asked him out yet?"

"Why the fuck would I ask him out?" Levi snapped. As the words left his mouth, he cringed at how childishly defensive he sounded. Isabel raised a brow. "I am training him. It would be unprofessional."

"Do you want him or not?" Farlan asked.

Levi glared at Farlan. "It's none of your business."

"On the contrary. As your best friend, it is my…"

"Why are you two so obsessed with that brat?" Levi interrupted.

"Because he wants you, Levi, and you want him," Isabel said, as if it were the most obvious thing. "And if you keep pussyfooting it neither one of you are going to get what you want."

Those words couldn't be truer. Levi wanted Eren, and it had become apparent that Eren wanted him as well. The ball was well within Levi's court now, and he knew that if he didn't make a move, nothing would come of it. He would forever be left not only wanting, but wondering what could have been. But having said that, despite them both wanting one another, did Eren want from Levi what he wanted from Eren?

Sighing, Levi resigned. "You know what I want from a partner. What if he…"

"Have you asked him about it?" Isabel asked before Levi could finish his question. Levi glared at Isabel. He detested being interrupted when he spoke. "If you don't ask, you will never know. Maybe he's into kinkier stuff than you!" Isabel winked. "Besides, even if he's not, it won't kill you to have some sort of a relationship with another living human, Levi. It's been too long since you've been intimate. Even steel needs to be polished."

" _Do you like getting your ass spanked raw and calling older men daddy_?" Levi said in a mocking tone. "Great conversation starter."

"It's not half bad, actually," Farlan said, and Isabel hummed in agreement.

"You have no tact," Levi said. He looked between the beautiful woman and the bland man beside her before shaking his head and saying, "How the hell did you get her?"

Farlan grinned. "I asked. As the bible says, ask and you..."

"Don't bring the bible into this," Levi snapped before Farlan could continue.

An awkward silence hung between the trio as Isabel peered at Levi expectantly, Farlan crossed his arms over his chest with a brow raised and Levi stared at a spot on the floor thinking about what they had been saying. _Even steel needs to be polished_.

"Okay," Levi eventually said. He truly had nothing to lose. "I'll talk to him."

Isabel raised a brow and folded her arms across her chest. "Are you just saying that to pacify us?"

A large part of Levi was tempted to confess that that was his exact intentions. But then again, if he kept pussyfooting about the situation, he would get nowhere. Eren wanted him, and he wanted Eren, and given what had recently transpired between the two of them, the ball was definitely in his court. He may not get everything he would want from Eren, but Isabel was right – he couldn't just assume Eren would not want to do those things with him. For all he knew, Eren may very well be one kinky bastard.

"I'll talk to him."

Isabel perked up; her eyes lit up like a kid meeting Santa Claus, crinkling up a little as her smile all but reached from ear to ear. The unadulterated happiness, and dare Levi note relief, had a surprisingly positive effect on the man. He felt pleased that he'd been able to make his friend happy, though as that warm feeling trickled through his body, he noted that it was probably a result of years of living to please her.

"Good!" she said. "Now don't back down. You said you're going to talk to him, so you will talk. Commit."

Rolling his eyes, Levi mumbled, "I caught the kid jacking off to me, I've got nothing to lose."

"You caught the kid what?" Farlan cried out as Isabel gasped.

Levi froze; he realized a moment too late that he had mumbled just a little too loudly. Could he blame the erroneous judgement of his volume on the tendency for Eren to cause slips in his usually flawless self-control? Looking at his stunned friends, he knew that blaming Eren for this one would be irresponsible and frankly immature; this one was all on him. He was just a little too comfortable with the couple, and because of that, slips happened.

Sighing, Levi set out to tell them the story. It was somewhat vague but mostly factual, and it briefly outlined the details of the night from the moment Eren had gotten sick at the dojo to the moment Levi had left Eren's home.

* * *

Telling it as it was gave Levi the objective perspective he needed. As a self-critical person, his decisions in life were mostly based on facts, not made out of desire, hope or due to being enslaved by emotions. This decision to avoid Eren, however, had been. Although now that he had spoken about it, now that he had faced questions that he had not asked himself and was able to answer them truthfully, he realized that from an objective standpoint, he had nothing to lose. He could not afford to let one potential disappointment rob him of a guaranteed good time. As a matter of fact, that would be stupid, to be quite frank.

It was with that in mind that Levi called Eren to ascertain whether or not he would be at the next training session. Eren seemed eager enough despite having missed today's session, and Levi's suspicions were quickly proven right when Eren profusely apologized for what he had previously said. Eren wanted answers, and Levi was quite sure that the only reason Eren would be training the following day was to get them; he was even willing to go so far as to threaten Levi, and he had to admit, the brat had balls to have done that.

Levi knew it was an empty threat, but it was enough to rattle the man into promising to talk.

The following day, Eren arrived with a smile on his face and a limp in his step. As always, he socialized with some of the other fighters, only this time Levi watched, eagerly awaiting the moment the brunette would give him his undivided attention. However, with twenty minutes to run before their scheduled appointment, Levi knew he would be waiting a long time for his chance with the young fighter.

He took that time to observe Eren. Despite being in obvious pain – wincing every single time he moved – Eren had his usual jovial air about him. He was animated in his conversations, his eyebrows wiggling wildly up and down and his arms swinging stiffly back and forth as he entertained the small group of fighters around him. The youngsters laughed among themselves, exchanging pats on the back and high fives in a show of good camaraderie. Levi wondered what it was that they were talking about.

With ten minutes to go, Eren was about to make his way to Levi when the notorious Jean Kirstein came waltzing into the dojo. Levi's brows furrowed into a scowl as his eyes fixed on the taller brunette, all but daring him to behave inappropriately so that he could teach the kid a lesson. Instead, Kirstein simply waved at Eren – no cocky grin, no wink, no objectifying whistle or demeaning comments – just an awkward, almost shy wave. Eren's wave was just as awkward, if not more so; the young novice seemed unsure about Kirstein's presence, but a smile touched his lips as if he were _happy_ to see that punk.

Gritting his teeth together, Levi lifted his head and whistled to steal Eren's attention. The brunette immediately responded, tearing his attention from Jean and hurrying his limping walk to get to Levi quicker.

As Eren neared him, Levi shot one more glance at Kirstein that was met by fierce hazel eyes. Kirstein glared at Levi with such fury that Levi imagined the brunette lifting his lips to expose his teeth in a snarl. Levi was sorely tempted to smirk at Kirstein, as if to say, "He's mine." Of course, that temptation was ignored.

"Hi, Levi," Eren said.

"Eren."

"You'd better go easy on me, I am still pretty immobile," Eren said as he tossed his bags to the floor. He grinned at Levi then, that sweet boyish grin that held the culmination of the world's innocence within it. "But they do say that motion is the best lotion."

Levi wanted to roll his eyes, but he was lost to Eren's boyish charm. He couldn't figure out what it was that he liked about the boy – yes, Eren was attractive, feisty, zesty and admittedly intriguing, but was liking someone so many years younger not damning from the start?

"Uhm, Levi," Eren said, his voice tone completely different from a moment ago. Levi raised his eyebrows and gestured for Eren to continue. "I'm sorry for threatening you. I wouldn't speak about that, I just…"

"I know," Levi interrupted. He smirked. "Besides, it's not true."

Eren scowled. "You're _not_ gay?"

With a cocky smirk, Levi shook his head only once.

"You're lying," Eren said, a cocky grin of his own plastered onto his face.

The veteran fighter wondered if Eren was saying that because of ambition, as a blind stab in the dark or because he was taking to heart what had been said the other day. Levi's parting words had been incredibly ambiguous, and he couldn't help but wonder if what he said was intentional or because of his infamous Eren-induced lapses in judgement.

"Either way, you said you'd talk to me about what happened," Eren said.

Of course Eren would not forget. Given the state of his mobility, that conversation was probably his only incentive to come train today.

"We'll talk after the session," Levi said.

"Where?"

"My place."

With a scowl on his face, Eren stiffly bent his leg behind him and grabbed his ankle to stretch his quadriceps. As he held the position, his eyes met with Levi's and he said, "I'd rather we go somewhere more neutral."

Levi tilted his head to the side and crossed his arms; this was one of those moments of intrigue, where he wished to see how firmly Eren would stand his ground, but in the same breath, it was also a moment that he could foresee becoming incredibly irksome. After all, he had no desire to negotiate the location of a conversation he did not want to have in the first place.

"I'd prefer privacy," Levi simply said.

"I'm entitled to my own preferences as well," Eren snapped. He changed legs. "Besides, we can get plenty of privacy at a quiet café or a park."

"I'm already accommodating your preferences by having this conversation in the first place," Levi said through gritted teeth.

Dropping his leg, Eren assumed a wide-legged stance before leaning to one side to stretch his adductors. As he leaned, he winced – it felt as though some damning force was pulling his legs apart from his groin with a white-hot chain. After riding out the pain for a moment, Eren replied to Levi.

"This is a conversation we need to have."

With a single brow raised, Levi said, "Actually, this is a conversation you want to have and I am entertaining…"

"Cut the shit, Levi!" Eren snapped. He righted his stand and straightened his posture to meet Levi's hardened gaze with his own. "You treated me like shit the other day, and you are being cryptic and giving me weird signals. I really want to train with you but I can't if you are going to be like this."

"Then don't."

Levi stayed quiet for a moment, knowing full-well that his response was colder than it should have been. He waited for Eren to reply, and watched as the brunette genuinely contemplated walking away. He wondered what the likelihood of that happening was, and in that event he wondered how likely he would be to ask Eren not to go.

When Eren did not respond, Levi eventually said, "This is a conversation that would be best held in private."

"I don't know if I am comfortable being in your house," Eren said. His eyes narrowed. "Last time I was there, I was treated like a rabid dog."

It was Levi's eyes who narrowed then. With an agitated twitch of his lip, Levi glared at Eren as a million retorts bubbled up in his throat. Yes, how he had treated Eren was not right and there was no way to justify that, but with Eren phrasing it like that, the brunette was making it sound exponentially worse that it was.

"I'm not going to kick you out of my house, if that's what you're implying," Levi said, his voice low and hard.

"Can I trust you?" Eren challenged.

Oh, how the boy played right into Levi's weak spot. If there was one thing Levi needed, it was a person's trust. While he did not go out of his way to earn people's trust, the moment a person doubted him or stated that they could not trust him, he felt like he was a failure. To not be trusted, he had to genuinely be a shitty human being, and after having met dozens of those, he knew he was not shit. He knew he was not the greatest, but he was definitely not a piece of shit.

"Try me," Levi said. His response, although casual, was simply covering up the turmoil of having the man he desired as a sub not trusting him.

"I'd rather not."

Deep inside, Levi wished he could give Eren a kick that would drop the brat to the floor so he could straddle him, shake him and demand he comply. That, however, would be incredibly inappropriate and unacceptable, amongst other things. Levi would have to be more tactful in luring Eren to his home once again.

Leaning a little closer to Eren, Levi whispered, "I'd rather talk about catching you jerking off in my shower in a private place, unless you don't mind people being privy to that conversation."

Eren's face immediately darkened and he stepped away from Levi, emerald eyes guarded yet ashamed as they frantically jumped back and forth between each one of Levi's eyes. By the change in the youngster's demeanour, Levi knew he had him.

"Fine," Eren said quietly. "Your place it is. But I am first going home to shower, and I'll meet you there."

"We'll chat about that after training," Levi said, knowing full-well that he had every intention of driving Eren to his house himself. He handed the brunette a skipping rope before saying, "Fifteen minutes on the rope for warm-up."

* * *

 **Thank you for the read, and the ongoing support.**

 **OS**


	17. Chapter 17: I Want You

**A/N: As promised, an update that didn't come eons late.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

Looking around at the familiar setting, Eren couldn't fight off the apprehension building in his gut. Levi seemed sincere enough in his promise not to become hostile, but despite that, Eren could not believe that he was here once more – without having showered at home as he intended. Levi was either incredibly tempting in his offer, overwhelmingly overbearing or Eren was just weak-willed – or perhaps it was all three – but Eren eventually gave in to the proposition and here he stood.

Sighing heavily, Eren quietly ventured deeper into the apartment as Levi meandered about silently. Eren paid him no mind until he eventually came to a standstill before Eren, with a towel nestled in his arms.

"Go shower," he said, his lips curling up into the faintest smile as he added, "and if you're going to jerk off again, invite me."

Those words left the brunette completely dumbfounded. He stared at Levi, blinking as he tried to digest what was just said to him. Was it _just_ a joke, or was it a matter of "true words are often spoken in jest"? The mischievous glint that he imagined he saw in Levi's eye suggested the latter, but Eren knew he was getting his hopes up to no avail. Levi was probably only teasing him.

So instead of stumble for a response, Eren took the towel silently and made his way to the bathroom. He showered in record time, scrubbing himself from head to toe in less than ten minutes. In that time, his mind inevitably wandered and began creating scenarios about the conversation that was to come. In one of his fantasies, he asked Levi a question that he should have brought up long ago: how had he heard him in the first place?

Eren balked as the question came up. He stood under the scalding water and stared straight ahead for a minute as he tried to formulate the possibility, or rather the probability, of Levi being able to hear his soft moans over the sound of running water, and through the closed bathroom door. Eren would never have done it in the first place if he suspected there was even the slightest chance that a person passing the door would be able to decode what was happening inside the bathroom. Levi would have had to be listening incredibly attentively to have been able to hear those soft moans amidst the barrage of background noise.

So how had Levi heard him in the first place?

That single question swirled around in Eren's mind until he eventually shut off the water and hopped out of the shower. He dried himself and wrapped the towel around his waist before storming out of the bathroom in search of Levi, hell-bent on finding an answer to his question. He charge directly to Levi's bedroom, swinging the door open carelessly and opening his mouth to talk, but his words were stolen from him and his fierce focus obliterated by the sight that greeted him.

Levi stood in the center of his bedroom, wearing nothing but a form-fitting pair of black briefs. That, however, was not what had Eren trip over his tongue. The intrusion had stolen Levi's attention, causing the man to turn around as Eren entered the room, and as he turned, he presented Eren with a near-unobstructed view of an incredibly impressive package nestled neatly behind the black cotton.

"Don't you knock?" Levi growled.

"I uh…" Eren blinked rapidly as he desperately scrambled for words, eyes glued on the part of Levi he so desperately wished to see.

"Oi, eyes up here, brat!" Levi said with a snap of his fingers. Eren's eyes guiltily lifted to meet Levi's, and he was pleasantly surprised when he saw amusement instead of irritation in those grey orbs that were focused intently on him. "What has you on such a mission?"

It was then that Eren remembered his objective. He scowled and said, "How did you hear me jerking off?"

"What?" Levi had obviously not expected this question.

Eren could not resist dropping his eyes just once more. It was a quick but shameless glance at a prize he so desperately sought before lifting his gaze to meet Levi's once more. With his eyes set on Levi's, he repeated his question.

The older man offered no answer, and clearly had no intention of answering. He simply glared at Eren as if Eren had asked him the color of the sky. The look in Levi's eye very clearly stated that he would not entertain this level of idiocy. It may have seemed like a stupid question to him, but to Eren, there was a genuine mystery behind it. He would not let this question go unanswered.

"How did you hear me through a closed bathroom door and over the sound of the water? I know I wasn't that loud."

"How do you know that?" Levi challenged.

Eren's brows drew closer together in a scowl. "I jerk off often enough to know exactly how loud I get."

"Touché."

"So," Eren said, crossing his arms over his chest, "how did you hear me from outside the bathroom."

"I wasn't outside the bathroom when I heard you."

 _What?_

Eren froze. He stared at Levi blankly, waiting for the man to crack a smile, roll his eyes or snort…anything to indicate that those words were just a joke. However, none of that happened. Levi stared at Eren patiently, as if he were waiting for Eren to realize the damning implication of that single phrase.

"Then…" Eren's arms unfolded and one of his hands raised before him, an unsure index finger pointing at Levi as he struggled to find a way to lay his deduction bare without sounding brash.

However, before he could find his words, Levi said, "Yes, I was inside the bathroom."

"What the fuck!" Eren cried out, partly mortified but partly thrilled.

"I was bringing you a towel," Levi said casually. "I just happened to do so as you came."

Levi proceeded to putting on a pair of grey sweatpants, finally covering up the fruit Eren desired. Eren sighed and stepped back, emerald eyes dropping to the floor in resignation as the huff of a humorless laugh slid through unsmiling lips.

"Then why are you doing this?" he asked in a small voice.

"Doing what?"

"You know I want you," Eren said, troubled eyes lifting to meet Levi's, "yet you keep teasing me. You say things and do things that get my hopes up, then you tell me you're not gay, then you say things like "invite me if you jerk off again". You're confusing me. You're making me want to make a move and I know you don't want that, and if I do, you'll probably floor me."

"Easily," Levi said, eyes narrowing as they ran the length of Eren's frame. "If I wanted to."

Suddenly, the brunette felt exposed and immensely under-powered – if Levi did ever decide to get physical, he would be tickets. Fortunately, he knew Levi would never do that outside the ring. It was against not only the dojos policy, but against Levi's personal beliefs. Eren almost wanted to laugh at how much trust he was placing in the morals of a man he barely knew.

Eren shrugged. "What now? Why am I here?"

"You wanted to talk to me."

Eren ran his fingers through his wet locks as he pondered how it was possible for one man to be as infuriating and as evasive as Levi Ackerman. It was as if he could never get a straight answer from the man, as if everything was a negotiation, a power-struggle, or a challenge. It definitely kept him on his toes, but right now, Eren just wanted straight answers. However, to get them, he would have to ask direct questions.

Taking a deep breath, Eren mustered up the courage to ask what had been on his mind.

"The other night, you said to me that it wasn't me you were worried about." Eren held his breath as he braced himself for what was about to come from his lips. "Did you mean you were worried you would make a move on me?"

"I told you, I'm not…"

"Bullshit!" Eren snapped, stepping closer to the man. He may have imagined it, but there was a glint in Levi's eyes that he caught as he advanced, the very glint of the excitement of a challenge. Deny it all he wanted, but Eren liked it. "I don't care if you're straight, gay, bi or pan. I want to know what you meant when you said those words."

A moment of silence settled between the two men as they glared at each other. Levi's expression was completely unreadable, but despite that, Eren held his gaze. He would not back down.

Eventually, Levi spoke. "What do you think it means?"

"For fuck's sake!" Eren threw his hands up in exasperation.

"I will answer you, but I want to know what you think before I do."

When Eren's eyes met with Levi's this time, there was a darkness in them driven by frustration and need. "I think you want to fuck me."

Levi smirked. "Oh?"

"I answered your question. Now you answer mine."

"What if your deduction is right?"

Eren hadn't considered that possibility. He had hoped for it, and in that faraway hope he had formulated wondrous scenarios where he and Levi spent the night in passion in each other's arms. Yet despite it being his fantasy, he hadn't once considered the probability of it being a reality.

"If you want me, then take me," Eren said softly.

The veteran fighter raised a brow and stepped closer to the brunette. Eren could feel his heart beginning to beat faster in his chest as Levi close the space between them, that mischievous glint from earlier now a burning ember as those grey hues bore into his. The weight of the moment and the implication of the advance had Eren's blood pumping , fueling a specific part of him that, try as he may, he could not tame. All that he could hope for now was that it did not rise to the challenge as well.

"Do you want me to fuck you, Eren Yeager?" Levi asked. Those words rolled off his tongue with a seductive purr, sending to hell all hope of Eren keeping his arousal at bay.

"Yes," he said.

"Keep dreaming, brat," Levi said with a smirk. With that, Levi pulled away from Eren and walked off, leaving Eren standing alone in the bedroom. "There's a pair of pants on my bed that you can sleep in."

Dumbfounded, infuriated and feeling the sting of rejection, Eren shot an unimpressed glare at the pants before turning and glaring down the passageway down which Levi disappeared. How dare the man play on his emotions and desires in that way? How the hell could he possibly think it okay to toy with someone in this way? The brunette's hands balled into fists a moment before he went stalking after Levi.

When he found Levi in the kitchen, Eren grabbed the smaller man, flung him around and pinned him by his shoulders to the kitchen cupboard with enough force to have winded a lesser man. Instead of fight back or even resist, Levi simply let the young fighter manhandle him, his grey eyes bored as they bore into Eren's with an intensity that would have had Eren back down on any other day.

"Why are you doing this to me?" Eren demanded. "Why are you fucking with me?"

"I'm not," Levi replied coolly. "You're being a horny brat."

Gritting his teeth together, Eren growled out, "I am not! I'm just trying to understand where the fuck I stand with you!" He shook Levi once. "Tell me, damn it."

When had the gap between them become so small? When had Eren's lips moved so close to Levi's? When had their breaths become one draft? At what point had Eren inched close enough to feel the powerful beating of Levi's heart?

"I want you, Levi," Eren whispered. "Not just right now, not just tonight, but I want you."

"What do you want from me?" Levi asked.

As he spoke, Levi's cool breath washed over Eren's lips, causing the brunette to subconsciously bite onto his lower lip as his eyes dropped to where his lips wished to be pressed. He fantasized for a moment about kissing the man he had pinned to the wall, before lifting his eyes once more. Levi's gaze was one filled with intrigue, but behind that, Eren imagined he could see longing and desire that reflected his own.

"You."

"You love another man," Levi said.

That was unexpected. It was enough to have Eren pull back just a breath, to pull back just enough to give himself a moment to consider what he was about to do. Yes, he loved another man, a man whom he would have given up anything to have another chance with, a man who had begged for that very chance. He loved another man, a man he swore was his soul mate, his one and only, yet that man had not only broken his heart a dozen times or more but had also treated him worse that trash. Despite that, he still loved that man, and despite what that man had done to him, he was still considering that second chance.

He loved another man, but right now, he wanted _this_ man.

"I'm not going to compete with a wet-eared brat for your affection," Levi said, motioning to be free from Eren's hold.

As Levi moved forward, Eren pushed on the man's shoulders, keeping him pinned in place. Irritation flashed in those deadly hues, but that threat only had Eren's desire grow.

"You won't compete…"

Before Eren could finish his sentence, Levi attacked. He hit at the fold in Eren's elbows, causing both the brunette's arms to buckle, which had him nearly falling face-first against Levi. The veteran, however, caught Eren before their faces connected, effortlessly turning the brunette around to face away from him before forcing him to his knees in the middle of the kitchen. It was over in two seconds, and at the end of it, Eren was naked and on his knees on the kitchen floor, with Levi on his knees behind him. Levi's lips were pressed against Eren's ear.

"I'm not a kid, Eren," Levi said. "As much as I want to fuck you, that is not all I want from you. I will not be your one-night stand. If you want me, then give me all of you, not just sex."

With that, he released his hold on the brunette. He made his way out of the kitchen and slowly started down the passageway, calling back as he spoke, "The guest room is the second door on the right. Switch off the lights when you go to bed."

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 **Thanks for the ongoing support. I want to make things interesting so I have a suggestion: leave ideas about what kinks you may want to see, specifically what kinks Levi has and what kinks Eren has. Best ideas will get written ;P**

 **OS**


	18. Chapter 18: Lapse in Self-Control

**A/N: Update time. Being regular isn't so bad haha. Thanks for the kink ideas, I think I can incorporate all of them into the next couple of chapters. You guys rock ;)**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

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As Levi lay in bed, he wondered what Eren would do next. The brunette had nothing but a towel wrapped around his body, if even that at this stage, and the pants he was supposed to have taken was still sprawled across Levi's bed. The man eyed the pants, not once considering taking it to Eren. If he wanted it, he would have to come and fetch it himself.

Sighing, Levi made himself comfortable as he relived the events of this evening. He could almost not believe that he had manned up and confronted Eren. Even though it came to nothing more than an impasse, he was simply happy to have the ball out of his court. Come to think of it, the ball was completely out of play now. It had been knocked out into orbit and would stay there until the tentative tension between the two men eventually breaks, and when that happens, that ball would come crashing down with the force of a meteor.

The tension would eventually break.

Eren's passion was insurmountable. It overflowed from within the young man and had him act out aggressively and dominantly. It left Eren in a heightened state; Levi could feel that excitement as Eren had him pinned to the cupboard. Levi could feel the brunette's rigid flesh so tentatively tucked behind the towel, pressing against him and twitching at the slightest contact.

Levi would be a liar if he said that that feeling was not arousing.

What made it more so was the fact that Eren was completely oblivious to it. He was not pressing up against Levi seeking contact, he had Levi pinned because he wanted his demands to be met. His attention was focused on Levi; his fierce gaze fixated on Levi's lips, waiting for the words he wanted to hear.

However, what made the moment even sweeter was the exposure that came after Levi freed himself from the excitable young man's grip. The image of Eren's flesh was imprinted in Levi's mind. It had a good length, with perfectly proportionate girth, and was cut with a generous network of thick veins running along the shaft. The glans was bulbous and protruded from the shaft hungrily, its color deep red as if Eren had been edging for hours prior to that moment. It was devilishly sexy to say the least.

Levi's teeth caught his bottom lip as the image of temptation incarnate burned in his mind and quickly turned into fantasy. Closing his eyes, Levi's hand tentatively found his own length and loosely gripped it, imagining his hand around the shaft of Eren's cock. He wondered what it would feel like – he could only imagine how soft the skin along that rigid shaft would feel, he could only imagine the heat Eren's cock would exude. He imagined the fine twitches of excitement at his touch, the ache, the need, and the eventual spilling of precum as instinct took over.

"Fuck…" Levi whispered under his breath as he did to his cock what he wished to do to Eren's.

This time, there was no agitation or disgust. There would be no berating himself for being a victim of his unfortunate masculine instinct, or for devolving into a being that ached for release in this way. He would not find himself disappointed at the lapse in his self-control, and he would not blame Eren for that lapse either. Tonight, Levi recognized the fact that he was just a man; a man with a need that needed to be satisfied.

Levi relieved himself of his tracksuit pants and underwear before lying atop his duvet with his legs spread and hand fisted loosely around his length. He slowly glided his hand up and down his shaft, foreskin stimulating his swollen glans as he enjoyed the raw friction of contact without lube. His eyes were fixed on his motions, imagining Eren's cock in his hand instead of his own. As his twitched, he imagined it to be Eren's. As his hips stuttered forward, his instinct overriding his sanity, he imagined the desperate whimpers of the brunette begging for more.

A low growl escaped from between Levi's clenched teeth as his need for more intensified. His hand began to move faster, the rhythm more consistent as the objective became clear: cum. He had to climax quickly; if Eren were to come into his room to fetch those wretched pants now, Levi would take him given half the chance. Despite having said only moments ago that he did not _just_ want to fuck, that was _all_ Levi wanted right now.

Just then, there was a soft knock on his bedroom door.

Levi cussed under his breath before scrambling to cover his naked body with his duvet. For a brief moment, he considered acting as if he were deep asleep, but he knew it would be unrealistic. Besides, Eren would simply wake him up. With an irritated sigh, Levi called out for Eren to enter his room.

Eren timidly entered the room, with the towel fast around his waist. His eye darted around the room as if he were trying to find a threat hidden in the darkness.

It fascinated Levi, how quickly Eren's demeanour could shift. From assertively pursuing a goal to timidly skulking about in the darkness – if Levi had not known it was Eren in his room, he would have said it was a completely different person.

"Sorry to bother but uhm…can I get those pants?" Eren asked.

The silence that followed was not because Levi wanted to behave dismissively towards Eren. The man did not speak because he could not trust what was going to come out of his mouth. He lay in bed, cock hard and the need to have it touched all but consuming him, with the object of his desire physically within reach with nothing more than a mere towel covering the fruit he wished to eat of. No, Levi could not trust himself. Even with his prided self-control, he could feel he had none left. In addition to that, Eren Yeager was the kryptonite to that demeanor.

Instead, Levi turned on his bedside lamp and motioned for the pants on the bed. As Eren reached for it, Levi froze – he should have left the light off. Having it on only highlighted the planes of Eren's torso that his tongue could trace along.

 _Shit…get a grip, Levi._

Eren took the pants, but did not leave right away. His emerald hues were darkened by the turmoil swirling within them, but Levi felt no empathy in this moment – the brunette had to leave. Now.

"What?" Levi snapped, after a minute of Eren's silent brooding.

Those troubled, youthful eyes lifted to meet Levi's. "It wouldn't be a one-night stand."

If Levi thought he had been acquainted with temptation before, he was wrong. The desperation and sincerity in Eren's eyes and in his quiet tone of voice all but pulled Levi in on a leash. His cock twitched beneath the covers as his mind reared up in anarchy, the riot moving swiftly through his thoughts and demanding only one thing: Eren. The force was undeniable, but Levi had to fight it – he did not want to succumb to his instincts and find himself regretting his actions afterwards.

Steeling his expression, Levi coldly replied, "That's what they all say."

"I am not _them_ ," Eren retorted without missing a beat.

Of course this was true. From what Levi knew of Eren, the boy would not fuck and duck. Even if only because of his insatiable appetite that would have him coming back for more, Levi knew that if he were to fuck Eren now, it would not be the last time.

 _Don't do it._

"You say that now, but what will you say once you've gotten what you wanted?" Levi challenged, though he could hear the weakness in his resolve.

Eren was a good man, but he was a man nonetheless. Men lie.

"Let's find out," Eren whispered darkly.

That was unexpected; unexpected but devilishly seductive.

The older man clenched his jaw and swallowed thickly at the raw implication behind those three little words. Every muscle in his body had tensed in anticipation, his heart beating faster as his desire reached fever-pitch. He would lose the battle, he would lose the war; he could feel himself giving in to temptation, and the lustful storm in Eren's eyes did little to ease that. What Levi saw in Eren's eyes was unadulterated desire, and those darkened hues were fixated on Levi, patiently awaiting Levi's response.

That ball had just fallen out of orbit, and smashed right back into Levi's court.

Try as he may, Levi could not formulate a response. He simply stared at Eren like a wolf caught in a snare as his mind maintained itself perfectly blank. Only then did Levi realise that Eren's glare was not one waiting for a mere response, but one that was waiting for a response to a challenge. At that realisation, Levi's words came swiftly, but before he could speak, Eren laughed humourlessly.

"Goodnight, Levi," Eren said with a half-cocked smile on his lips. With that, Eren made his way out of Levi's room.

"Wait," Levi called out. Eren stopped dead in his tracks but did not turn around. "Come here."

He did not know why he called Eren back. He knew it was a bad idea – the longer Eren stayed and the closer his proximity, the more likely it would be that they would give in to their lust. Eren had to go, but Levi did not want to see him leave.

"What do you want from me, Levi?" Eren asked, before turning slightly.

"If I told you, you'd run away," Levi said.

Eren huffed a humourless laugh. "Try me."

"I'd rather not," Levi retorted.

Eren's teeth snapped together, followed promptly by a sharp expiration. He turned towards Levi, his eyes yet again portraying a vastly different emotion from earlier, but one that burnt deeper than even the boy's lust – anger. The brunette came to stand directly beside Levi's bed, towering over the man and glaring down at him with nothing short of hatred in his eyes. Had Levi been a lesser man, he would feel intimidated, perhaps even scared, but right now, all he felt was intrigue.

"Why do you keep doing this?" Eren asked.

"What?"

"Don't play dumb!" Eren snapped. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a few seconds; when he opened them, that wrath was gone and desperation was left in its wake. "Why are you toying with me like this?"

Is that what the brat thought? Levi wanted to scoff at that! If only Eren knew the turmoil Levi was in, perhaps he would understand that his words and actions were not that of a man getting kicks out of yo-yoing with someone's desires, but that of a man desperately trying to keep his own in check. Of course, Eren would never understand...unless Levi told him. Could he?

"What do you want from me, Levi?" Eren asked again, only this time, his voice was breaking under the weight of desperation.

"You can't give me what I want," Levi said.

Eren's brows drew together as he lowered himself onto his haunches beside Levi's bed. "You don't know that."

Levi's response was swift. "You love another man, Eren."

The younger man's eyes pinched shut as he turned his head away. He clenched his jaw, hands balling into fists as they rested on Levi's bed, and after a second, he exhaled sharply. That was the reaction of a man who had been cornered, the reaction of a man who had been confronted with an undeniable truth, one he was unable to and unwilling to defend. However, a second later, Eren's eyes were open again, open and fixed on Levi with that wrath simmering just beneath the surface of the pain in his emerald hues.

"Do you know what that man did to me?" Eren said, his voice low and dangerous.

"It's not impossible for forgive someone you love."

"He fucking broke my heart."

"Wounds heal."

"Scars never go away."

Levi was impressed with Eren's ability to meet each challenge without skipping a beat. Of course, he could expect nothing less from the cheeky social butterfly.

"Fuck, I want to kiss you right now," Eren said.

Those words had Levi's eyes following Eren's gaze. The brunette was staring at Levi's lips hungrily, his own lower lip caught between his teeth and desire rampant in his eyes. Eren had found what he desired, and it was within reach. That reality had Levi's heart beating faster in anticipation, his throat suddenly dry and his tongue itching to lick his lips. He knew if he did that, though, it would lure the brunette in.

"Don't," Levi whispered weakly.

"You won't stop me," Eren said surely.

Oh, he was right. So right, in fact, that Levi could not confirm or deny the fact. He simply remained quiet as he watched Eren come to a conclusion. He lay propped up on his elbow, powerless, as Eren's hand rand through Levi's silky hair, eyes darting between Levi's eyes and his lips; the decision had been made, and the execution was only just beginning.

Eren leaned in and kissed Levi. It was not a slow advance entangled in sensuality. It was a raw and lustful kiss – his hand found the back of Levi's neck and brought Levi's face closer to his as he leaned forward, all in one motion, and their lips connected less than ceremoniously. It was abrupt and callous but filled with raw passion, and but a second after their lips touched, Eren's parted and lured Levi's lips and tongue into a staccato tango that may have seemed devoid of any rhythm to a lesser experienced man.

To Levi, however, the kiss was atomic. There was definitive desperation, unveiled passion and undeniable need in the way the younger man's lips and tongue moved with his. Levi would be damned but he had not been this turned on by a simple kiss since pubescence, and he very soon fell in with the heated battle.

Within moments, Eren had all but lost himself to the kiss. The towel was long since forgotten and the blanket stripped from Levi's form, and Eren had mounted and straddled Levi as he kissed the man. Levi's hands roamed across Eren's body – along the brunette's powerful thighs, his ass, his torso…anywhere Levi could reach, he touched, and each touch encouraged the younger man to grind against him, grind until their cocks touched.

It was electric. But what was even more atomic was the deep moan that came from Eren's mouth at that sweet contact.

Every fiber in Levi's being was lost to raw lust, and this moment could not be any sweeter. It had been months since he had had contact with another man in this way, and to have this attention from someone as attractive as Eren, someone he deeply ached for, was giving the man a different type of high. In spite of their conversation earlier, even though Levi explicitly stated he did not _just_ want to fuck, right now, he did not care. Right now, all he wanted was Eren Yeager, and he would take the brat any way he could.

Eventually, Eren's lips strayed. They moved from Levi's lips, to his jaw and down his neck, hungrily kissing wherever his lips could reach, tasting Levi's flesh with the soft tip of his tongue as it traveled further down. The contrast between the heat of Eren's kiss and the cold sting of the air against the wet trail the young man left behind was maddening, and that coupled with Eren's ministrations had Levi's eyes closed and head thrown back as he journeyed to utopia.

Even lower yet, Eren's tongue teased Levi's nipples one at a time, sensually and without haste, until both were erect. The drawn out attention to each little bud had Levi's hips rolling forward, meeting Eren's thrusts in a slow rhythm that had their cocks grinding against each other in an electrifying way. It was drawing Levi in, stripping him of the remnants of his sanity and thrusting him into a state of instinctive, raw need.

This had to stop. Levi had to stop Eren. He could not do this. Not tonight.

"Eren," Levi breathed out, "stop."

"No," Eren replied, his possessive grip on Levi's hips tightening as he pinned the man to the bed.

Instead of stop, his lips trailed lower, his tongue tracing the lines of Levi's abs and kissing each budding muscle as if he were a worshipper at a temple.

"Stop," Levi said, but his resolve sounded weak.

Eren hummed, but continued nonetheless. He continued further down, until his tongue tentatively licked at the tip of Levi's cock.

That was the moment they would have crossed the point of no return. Levi knew that if this didn't end now, it would only end when they were both satisfied. The soft touch of Eren's tongue against his cockhead jolted Levi into action.

Levi's hand darted out and his fingers entangled in Eren's hair, getting a good grip on those thick, brown locks before tugging hard at them. It was a firm and powerful tug, one that would have undoubtedly hurt, but it only elicited a deep moan from the boy. Levi could feel Eren's cock twitch against his leg in that moment, and that was when one thing became apparent to Levi, one thing that could very well be a game changer: Eren liked pain.

Levi forced Eren off his cock despite this revelation – this had to stop. That was the only thought running through Levi's mind. Regardless of what Eren liked, even if it was something Levi could offer in abundance, this had to stop.

"We're not doing this," Levi said, sounding set in his resolve for the first time.

Eren smiled drunkenly. "That's no fun."

With a growl, Levi tugged at Eren's hair, eliciting a whimper that sinuously evolved into a light moan. The sight of Eren in pain at his touch was damning – Levi could feel the twitch in his flesh as it strained against Eren, who undoubtedly felt the jolt of excitement as well. The boy smirked.

"You like hurting me?" Eren purred.

"Shut it," Levi snapped. If Eren decided to play on that fact, there would be no stopping this.

Eren chuckled. "Yes sir."

Levi froze. He remembered the first time Eren called him "sir", at Smith's. He remembered wishing that the form-fitting tuxedo the brunette was wearing could be gone, leaving the young man naked and saying that sweet word. That fantasy had just become a reality, with the brunette naked and on Levi, saying the one word Levi desired to hear most coming from his mouth, albeit sarcastically. That sarcasm, that brattiness, only added to the intrigue.

"Hah, you like being called sir," Eren noted.

Of course it showed. Levi must have been staring at Eren like a starving dog seeing food for the first time. There was no point in denying it.

"I think I have an idea of what you're into," Eren said with a smile.

"Shut up, brat," Levi said. This time, there was no strength behind those words, only pure desperation. If Eren were to offer Levi what he wanted, all consequences be damned, Levi would take Eren up on that offer and then fuck him.

"And you think that will scare me off?" Eren shook his head. "Come on, sir. I'm a big boy. I can handle it."

Levi tightened his grip on Eren's hair once more, the whimper falling on deaf ears as he said, "Eren, I fucking said no. Go to bed."

"Why are you denying yourself?" Eren snapped. He grabbed Levi's cock, making the man jolt and loosen his grip on Eren's hair. "You want this. You want me! Stop telling me to go!"

Levi sighed. "Just…not tonight, Eren. Please." He could only hope Eren would understand.

The younger man looked up at him for a long moment, and Levi watched as those clouded eyes became clearer. He saw as the lust yielded to sanity, and eventually, Eren slid off from atop Levi, grabbed the towel and secured it around his waist once more. He threw the pants over his shoulder and made his way to the door.

"Goodnight, Levi," Eren said, ghosting out of Levi's room before the man had a chance to say the words back.

As the door shut, Levi pinched his eyes shut and pressed a fist to his forehead. That was too close. That was the worst lapse in self-control the man had had in his entire adult life, and the consequences thereof could have, and would have, been dire and far-reaching.

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 **Things are moving along. I hope it calms your exasperation some, val. ventu ;D**

 **OS**


	19. Chapter 19: The Confession

**A/N: Thank you, thank you! My beloved reviewers, you are the blood in this story's veins! We have some good momentum now in the story (and with the writing) so I am going to try and keep it up. Without further a due, I bring to you, chapter nineteen.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

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Morning brought with it the feint smell of coffee. The scent tickled Eren's senses, eventually coaxing his lids to peel back from his eyes, revealing a dark and unfamiliar room. He sighed; he had hoped that last night was just a dream. Waking in this room was the first and only indication he needed that he was not at home and that he was, in fact, in Levi's house, and that he had most likely made the advance that he had dreamed of.

Of course, in his dream, it had gone further than a heated kiss, but then again, reality had almost yielded the same result.

The brunette sat up and stretched. His torso was bare, but his lower half was covered in a pair of sweatpants that was only three inches too short for his legs. The conspicuous bulge in the pants caught his attention, and with a sigh, he palmed at his semi-erect cock. It was nothing new – he often woke with his cock either fully erect or at least standing at half-mast, yet despite the regularity of the occurrence, he cursed it this morning. He cursed it, and idly wondered if Levi ever got morning wood.

Just as that thought crossed his mind, the door to the bedroom flung open with more force than was necessary. Eren's head snapped up, eyes darting to the door to find the silhouette of the object of his thoughts and desires occupying the space in the door frame.

"So you're awake," Levi said.

Eren nodded. "Morning, Levi."

The older man stared silently at Eren, making the younger man feel suddenly exposed and self-conscious. Even though it was nothing Levi had not seen, knowing that the man's eyes were on him and drinking in his features made Eren feel somewhat uncomfortable. It made him feel desired, but uncomfortable nonetheless.

"I made coffee," Levi said, before disappearing from the doorframe.

Eren sighed. He headed off to the bathroom to relieve himself, after which he rearranged his softening flesh in the least conspicuous manner possible. By the time he got to the kitchen, it would likely have reduced to its normal flaccid size, so he wasn't too worried about what Levi might see. Besides, the man had seen it – and felt it – at its full potential.

Coffee was silent and uneventful. The two men sat across from each other, silently sipping on their respective coffees, Eren scrolling absentmindedly through his Facebook feed while Levi read something on his tablet with his brow furrowed in concentration. Occasionally, Eren would glance up from the consuming machine in his hand to take in Levi's features, and every time his eyes caught the man, he nearly smiled – he couldn't believe he kissed Levi. He kissed Levi Ackerman. He had almost sucked Levi Ackerman's cock. Close, but no cigar.

"Something on my face, brat?" Levi asked.

Eren blinked and focused his eyes, his gaze meeting Levi's, and it was only then that he realized he had been staring. Instead of offer a snarky response, he simply shook his head and continued paying attention to his phone.

As Eren's mindless scrolling continued, his mind once again drifted to what had happened last night. Levi offered no resistance; in fact, the man seemed to thoroughly enjoy Eren's ministrations until Eren ventured a little too far south. He wondered if he had gone too fast, but quickly discredited that theory – he may not have taken a lengthy amount of time to trail his tongue down Levi's torso, but he most certainly did not dive right down to the prize. He felt like the journey of his lips and tongue was perfectly timed, especially given the state of arousal Levi was undeniably in.

Then what had gone wrong?

As soon as his tongue had touched Levi's cock, the man nearly freaked out. It was not the good type of freak out either – Levi had not suddenly found himself lost to lust, grabbing at Eren and wordlessly demanding more. On the contrary; Levi all but yanked Eren from his cock like a festering band aid on a gaping wound. There was something desperate about the action, something needy, and it showed in Levi's roughness. It was a roughness Eren enjoyed, and it showed. That show did not go unnoticed by Levi, and Eren could distinctly remember the man's grip slackening for just a moment as he registered that Eren liked what he was doing.

Levi liked hurting Eren, and when Eren called him out on it, it had brought back that defensive barrier that Levi so staunchly upheld. Eren couldn't help but wonder why.

 _Why would he stop if I liked him hurting me?_

"What?" Levi whispered dangerously.

Eren's eyes lifted to meet Levi's, confused at first, but when he saw the utter shock and intrigue in the man's usually impassive grey hues, it became apparent that his question was not thought, but rather spoken. At this realization, he could feel his cheeks begin to burn as a blush tinted his flesh crimson. Yet, despite the mortifying embarrassment of having such an intimate question so shamelessly aired, Eren couldn't break eye contact with Levi. It was as if those steely greys were shackles holding him in place, wordlessly commanding his undivided attention.

The power in those hues was second to none. The longer Eren stared, the smaller he felt – with every passing second, he felt more insignificant, more powerless, more helpless, but above all, with each passing moment he felt more and more like a pack animal being put on its place by its alpha. He had seen Levi's focused glare in the ring, and had oftentimes admired the intensity of a predator cornering its prey. He ogled it on the mural every day he spent at the dojo. This, however, was a dozen times more oppressing that anything he had ever seen from the man before.

It was frightening, but he'd be damned if he said he did not like it. In fact, he found it wickedly _arousing_.

He had to free himself of these shackles.

"Uhm…" Eren eventually said, scooting his chair back and jumping to his feet. "Thanks for the coffee."

"Wait."

It was one word, but it was spoken with such unwavering authority that it commanded Eren's compliance. Yet despite the undeniable surety, there was gentleness in Levi's voice that hinted that despite the command, noncompliance would not be punished. Despite this, Eren did comply. He froze, anxiously awaiting Levi's next words.

"Say that again," Levi said.

That blush on Eren's cheeks only darkened at Levi's request. There was no way he could repeat that question! It did not come out intentionally in the first place. It was a perfectly timed trick shot that could never be repeated. So instead of give Levi what he wanted, Eren simply shook his head.

Levi raised a brow. "Why not? Don't you want to know the answer?"

Eren swallowed thickly. Of course he wanted to know the answer, but he was simply unwilling to repeat the question. Instead, he stared at Levi, unable to understand the feeling pressing down on him. It made him want to fall to his knees in submission, like a dog with its tail between its legs before its master. Yet, despite the oppressive weight bearing down on him, it awakened a vicious self-preservation instinct that demanded Eren throw Levi with defiance.

That war between defiance and obedience held Eren absolutely still and silent.

Eventually, Levi snorted. "You're just a brat."

"I'm not a brat!" Eren snapped.

Levi smirked. "So it does speak."

"Asshole," Eren said with a growl.

"You have no idea," Levi said nonchalantly, before rising to his feet and ghosting past Eren. "Bring your dirty mug so I can wash it."

Eren stayed still for a moment. He wondered what it was about this man that had him think he had the right to boss Eren around in this manner. Was it Levi's status, his power, his wealth? What was it that put Levi in control? Above that, Eren wondered why it was that even when the man made demands, they were always done subtly and almost _politely_.

It had Eren's rebellious nature beg to deny, but his eagerness to please Levi more than willing to comply.

Stalking into the kitchen behind Levi, Eren watched Levi from behind as the man washed a single mug, his own still in his hand. He watched, his eyes hungrily devouring every inch of Levi's muscular legs, as they stood proudly on display, barely masked behind the tights he must have worn when working out early in the morning. Not only was Levi's ass taut and rounded, but his legs were shapely, muscular, and _thick_. It was obvious from a single glance that they held incredible power, and Eren couldn't help but wish they would take a hold around his waist.

"Oi, your mug," Leg said, turning around. He balked when he was met with the predatory eyes of a ravenous beast, but he was not taken aback in the least. Instead, he raised a brow, a dangerous glint in his eye that had Eren feel challenged. "See something you like?"

Eren's lip twitched. This man's audacity truly had no end.

"Why did you stop me last night?" Eren asked.

"I told you…" Levi started, but before he could finish, Eren interrupted him.

"…you don't _just_ want sex," Eren said sourly. "And I said to you it won't be a one-night stand. So tell me. Why. Did…"

Despite the strength in Eren's voice and his unwavering resolve, his words dissolved into nothing as Levi closed the gap between them. The older man may have been shorter than him, but the deadly glint in those steel grey orbs had Eren feeling minute as Levi glared heatedly at him. Eren had seen this look before – it was the look of a man confronted by an opponent he loathed. It was the look Levi gave his opponents in the ring as he dealt the final blow, the look of a sadist watching his victim choke to death.

"Did you mother not teach you not to fucking interrupt people when they talk?" Levi spat.

Fear had Eren's heartbeat rising as he stared down at Levi. Yet, even though fear had Eren's blood polluted with adrenaline as he fought tooth and nail to stand his ground as his instincts told him to flee, he could not fight back the defiance threatening to break free.

"Did your mother not teach you to not fucking lie?" Eren spat right back at Levi.

Rage. Unadulterated and unconcealed rage flashed in the fighter's orbs, and that single look was enough to have Eren cower back in unalloyed fear. As he took a step away from Levi, for a fleeting moment, Eren genuinely feared for his safety – the look in Levi's eyes very clearly told him he had crossed the line…by miles.

"I want to own you," Levi hissed. He clenched his jaw for a moment before dropping his voice to barely a decibel above a whisper, and when he continued speaking, venom dripped off his every word. "I want to strip away your consciousness, lay you bare and hurt you in ways that will make you wish you were dead. I want you to need me, I want you to be unable to breathe without me. I want to break you down until you are nothing more than a memory of this earth. And then I want to build you up and make you twice the man you ever dreamed of being. I want to make you bleed. I want every droplet of your sweat and blood to be nothing but absolute pleasure. I want to be the heartbeat that drives you. I want to be the very breath you breathe. I want to own you in such a way that you would die without me. I want _you_ , Eren Yeager, in ways no man has a right to own another living thing."

Eren's mind was blank. He had lost Levi at _I want to own you_. The rest of those words blew in and out of his mind like a gale down a valley, barely registering but the force behind it clear. He heard _need_ , _bleed_ , and _break_.

Suddenly, the assumption he had made of Levi the night before was no longer a mere assumption.

Levi sighed. "I'm going to shower." He pushed passed Eren and made his way down the passageway to the bathroom. "Please call yourself a cab. I have to work when I'm done." With that, he continued down the passageway, slinking into the bathroom and slamming the door shut.

The echo of the door shutting reverberated in Eren's mind long after the sound had faded from the air. That echo, like the damning beating of a hammer beating the nails into a coffin, held Eren in place. Levi's words swirled around in his mind, the gaps in what he'd heard being filled one by one as assumption, conclusion and evidence came together in one frightening yet thrilling masterpiece.

Levi wanted him.

Knowing that, Eren was sorely tempted to march to the bathroom and allow the older man to claim him. It wouldn't be impossible – Eren knew there was no key in the lock. Yet despite that temptation, Eren knew that if he were to do anything of the sort, it would not end well. Levi may have made the confession, but the tone behind those words came with a stark warning – stay the fuck away.

Eren had to leave. He did not want to, but he knew he had to give the man space.

After calling a cab, Eren hurriedly gathered his belongings. He was gone before Levi had finished showering, leaving behind the man he ached for and a promise of an adventure that piqued his interest in a way no other man ever had.

* * *

 **Things are moving along. As the year draws to an end, I hope to update a little more regularly. Once again, thank you for the ongoing support, especially the reviews. Each and every single one of them is an absolute pleasure to read, and it brings me a hell of a lot of joy knowing you guys and gals are enjoying the story. ^.^**

 **OS**


	20. Chapter 20: A Chance

**A/N: Val, thank you so much for pointing out the error in the previous chapter, it has been rectified.  
**

 **To all of you, thank you for the ongoing support. Your reviews make my day when I read them, and I am super happy that you're all enjoying the story. For the kinks, I love your suggestions and I'm sure I'm going to have a great time incorporating them into the story ;P  
**

 **This chapter is a little break from the intensity, so I promise the next update will come super soon after this one. Enjoy. :)**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

Warming up for practice, Jean wondered if Eren would be coming to the dojo tonight. He hadn't been in great shape after his last session with Levi, and after visiting his ex-lover, Jean could see that that strenuous session had taken its toll on Eren. To anyone else, Eren's persistence may have been impressive, but to Jean, it was downright irritating. Not only that, but he found it somewhat unprofessional that Levi would let a young athlete go that far.

Then again, there was many a sensei and a coach that often preached, "Don't stop until you puke, feint or die."

Pushing to extreme exhaustion had become a fad. It was just another way for young athletes to boast that they actually knew what their physical limits were because they had found them and surpassed them. It was risky, and incredibly unpleasant, but Jean would be lying if he said he hadn't doubled over with the contents of his stomach on the dojo floor more than half a dozen times.

The young fighter secured his wraps before beginning his work on the bag. He stood in a fighting stance and began jabbing at the bag with his left hand. He would jab it one hundred times lightly in quick succession, immediately followed by one hundred light crosses. Then his favorite part of warming-up would follow – push-ups. They were no ordinary push-ups, though – one push-up, then one jab. Two push-ups, jab-cross. Three push-ups, jab-cross-jab. Four push-ups, jab-cross—jab-cross. And so it went on until twenty. It burnt; it turned his muscles to jelly before the workout even began, and Jean loved it. Unlike Eren, he absolutely loved a good, tiring warm up.

Eren always used to hate warming up, even before they had started sleeping together. It had just become more bearable to him with Jean's promise of reward as their relationship blossomed. Jean smiled slightly at the memory, wondering through his strict count of push-ups and jab-crosses what the likelihood was that Eren would take him back.

That smile faded as he realized it was probably zero.

When he asked Eren for a second chance, there was nothing that indicated Eren would even consider it. He looked frightened of the prospect and annoyed that Jean had the supposed audacity to even present him with the option. Despite having been the one to beg since the split, now that the tables have turned, Eren wanted to hear nothing of it. It was as if all his willingness for a second chance had faded with all the begging he had done.

Karma. The thought terrified Jean.

"Fourteen done…fifteen," he growled, pushing through the pain as fatigue got a hold of his body prematurely. "Focus…sixteen…" He jumped up and began punching at the bag, his sixteen-shot jab-cross dance packing more power that it should have for a mere warm-up.

He dropped to the floor again, and began counting his push-ups from one. If Eren could push himself to such extremes with Levi, of course Jean would be able to get through a mere two-hundred-and-ten push-ups and jab-crosses. How hard can it be? Reaching seventeen, Jean hauled himself up and began tapping at the bag. Seventeen times his wrapped fists connected with the bag, before he was back on the floor counting from one.

He wondered how Levi had pushed Eren in that way. Oftentimes Eren reached a state like that in training because the pompous novice had a perpetual hard-on for challenging and beating other fighters, even at his own expense. Training one-on-one with Levi, there was no one to compete against. Unless it was Levi Eren was trying so desperately to impress.

With a growl, Jean pushed through his final set; twenty push-ups, followed by twenty jab-crosses. He could not afford to let his mind wander like that. He was inviting exhaustion, and eventually, he would be inviting injury. He had to clear his mind of Eren completely. No more Eren, no more being tired. He chanted that over and over in his mind until he reached the magical number twenty, breathing out harshly as he reached the crescendo before placing his hands on his hips and walking away from the bag.

When he turned, he saw Eren standing there, a backpack slung over his shoulder and emerald eyes focused on only him. A rush of excitement tore through his body as he remembered how often Eren would watch him train, those hungry eyes lustfully devouring his ass. Back before things fell apart, Eren was shameless in eye-fucking Jean any chance he could get. This glare, however, was not that of a man lustfully claiming what belonged to him. This glare was one filled with contemplation, and dare Jean say, disapproval.

Jean smiled and waved awkwardly at Eren as he closed the distance between them. Eren shifted, seemingly unsure of the advance, but waved back, sans smile.

"How're you?" Jean asked when he was near his ex-lover.

"Alright," Eren said. His eyes quickly dropped to Jean's legs, lifting to meet the taller man's eyes in the same breath…but the glance did not go unnoticed by Jean.

If there was one thing Jean knew Eren loved, it was his legs. Long, muscular and shaven, Eren had all but worshiped Jean's legs when they fucked. His ex's glance down was probably from pure habit – and Jean hoped some sort of appreciation or desire – and even though it was fleeting, it was still there. A part of Jean reckoned that even if he did not stand a chance at winning back Eren's heart or trust, at least they could still enjoy their explosive sex life. Eren had never shied away from that – he was just as horny as Jean. Maybe…

Jean quickly silenced that traitorous thought. As enticing as it was, that was what got him in this situation in the first place. He would no longer play on Eren's desires to get what he wanted. What he wanted had changed, or rather, he had realised the truth behind what he wanted. Not just Eren's attention, not just Eren's body, but everything Eren.

"Are you training with Levi today?" Jean asked, when he realized he had nothing more to say to Eren.

Eren shrugged. "I don't know. We didn't arrange anything."

Uncertainty was rife in Eren's eyes, and a hint of something else. Jean had never been incredibly good at deciphering other people's emotions at a glance, but Eren wore his heart on his sleeve. Something about Levi was bothering Eren; it was as obvious as the sun in the summer sky. Jean wondered idly if the price Levi was charging was too great for Eren to afford.

That brought back a question that had been on Jean's mind.

"How did you get Levi to say yes?" Jean asked.

Panic flashed in Eren's eyes. "To what?" Eren asked defensively.

Jean's brows drew together, confused. "To train you."

The relief washing over Eren's form was palpable, only adding to Jean's confusion…and intrigue.

"I don't know," Eren said. He smiled awkwardly; it was a smile Jean knew as one that hid the truth. "It just sort of happened."

Instead of call Eren out on it, Jean forced a laugh and said, "Shit like that doesn't _just happen_. The guy is a people-hating lone-wolf." Jean grinned slyly, leaning in closer to Eren. "What do you have on him?"

Eren's eyes widened and that panic from earlier was rife yet again. "N-nothing!"

Jean raised a single brow and narrowed his eyes suspiciously at Eren's frightful reaction, but before he could say another word, an ear-splitting whistle momentarily drowned out the soft old-school rock coming from the speakers around the dojo. Both brunettes looked up in the direction of the sound, only to find the very subject of their conversation glowering at them.

The look in the man's eyes was murderous. Levi was not known to smile, and was feared and respected by opponents and allies alike thanks mostly to the cold, murderous nature of his glare. It wasn't a show the man put on – those that knew him personally knew for a fact that that was just how he was. It was normal to feel intimidated, belittled and downright frightened by a single second of eye contact. But the glare in the man's eyes _now_ – the look of absolute hatred, the look of a man consumed by bloodlust – was one Jean had never seen before. He swallowed thickly, stepping away from Eren to put some space between them, before turning his attention back to his novice ex-lover.

"I think your sensei wants you," Jean said.

Eren sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "Barely."

Before Jean could ask what Eren meant, he had turned and walked away, towards Levi. Jean watched the man he loved, the man he had not only hurt but damn near destroyed, walk away from him. It may have been for a mere training session, but there was something stirring in Jean's gut that sought a deeper meaning to this moment. There was something that was telling Jean that what he was seeing was not Eren going to train, but the love of his life walking away…walking towards another man. Perhaps it was because Levi's eyes were fixed on him instead of Eren, much like the victor would taunt the beaten male as he claimed the prized mate.

Jean shook his head. It couldn't possibly be. He was imagining it. He had messed up, and he was in a situation he did not know how to get out of. All he was feeling and all he was seeing were simply the delusions of a guilty mind.

* * *

Days passed. Days turned to a week, and one week turned to two. Eren had not called or texted once. Their encounters had been limited to the daily greeting and occasional conversation at the dojo, nothing more. They would share nothing but pleasantries, Jean would ask how Eren's training with Levi was going, and before more could be said, Levi would summon Eren and he would respond like an obedient dog being called by its master for food.

The suspense was driving Jean mad.

Despite this, he did not push. He never once mentioned the conversation he and Eren had had. Not once had he asked Eren for an answer, or pushed forth with an advance. He had to give Eren his space, but damn him, it was becoming increasingly difficult.

Not to mention, the feeling of his love being claimed by another victor only grew. Levi often glared at him, especially when talking to Eren before training. Of course, it was only because the professional fighter was a punctual man who detested training others and likely wanted the sessions to be over and done with, but Jean couldn't help but look deeper into it. He imagined the annoyance at Eren's lack of punctuality as threats to "stay away from what's mine". Levi's glares made him feel like a trespasser, and that only truncated his time with Eren even more; he was a man that knew his place.

Until one day, Eren was not there. The two minute conversation Jean looked forward to every day did not happen that Friday afternoon. At first, he thought nothing of it, but as he trained, he realized Levi was not there either. His first thought after that was that Levi was unable to train Eren that day, which would explain both their absences, but as time dragged on, Jean realized that couldn't possibly be. If Levi was unable to train Eren, the obsessive novice would have joined the group training session. It was unlike Eren to slack off because of another person.

What made it even more suspicious, was that today was the day the dojo received entry forms for the upcoming competition, a competition with limited spots for novice fighters, and a competition Eren had threatened for months to take part it. It went without saying that after day one of the entries being open, all spots for novice fighters would be filled, yet despite that fact, Eren was not there to fill out an entry form.

Nevertheless, Jean trained on. At the end of his session, he filled in his own entry form, after which he eyed a blank entry form lying on the counter, wondering if he should fill it in and pay for Eren. Would that be too forward? Of course it would. Jean shook his head; as lovers, it would've been perfectly acceptable to enter on behalf of one's significant other, even paying for them, but as friends, the gesture became somewhat odd, and as ex-lovers, it was unarguably awkward.

In any event, Jean would have hell to pay if he paid for Eren. His ex-lover's pride would not be able to stomach the seemingly innocent gesture.

"Is your friend Yeager going to enter?" Sensei asked.

Jean looked up at the sensei and shook his head. "He wants to, but he wasn't here today."

"Spots are limited."

"I know," Jean said with a soft sigh.

Although unlikely, Jean wondered if Eren had simply forgotten that entries for the competition opened today. While it seemed incredibly unlikely for Eren to forget to secure his spot in what would become a milestone event, it was probably not impossible. With that in mind, Jean took a blank entry form with the intention of swinging by Eren's apartment on the way home to deliver it.

That wouldn't be forward or awkward, would it?

"I'll take a form for him," Jean announced.

The sensei nodded in acknowledgement. "I'd like to see the two of you fight. Yeager's improved a lot recently."

Of course he had; he'd been training – although most days it looked more like torture than training – with one of the world's best. Watching Eren spar had become quite the treat, and Jean had to admit that he was impressed by how his ex had matured as a fighter in such a short period of time. Eren had always said he would beat Jean one day…that threat no longer seemed empty.

Jean balked. _That's it._

Eren always wanted to win. From the moment the two met, they had a glorious rivalry, although Eren always came off second best due to his obvious lack of experience. When they had dated, that rivalry had only intensified, only then the two relieved their excess tension sexually. After the breakup, there was no more competing in jest and there was barely any sexual contact…but Jean was willing to bet his tuition fees that Eren's desire to beat him had not died along with their relationship. In fact, Jean was quite positive that that desire must have _grown_ since he had broken the novice's heart.

 _I'm a fucking idiot_ , Jean thought, huffing as he laughed humorlessly.

Eren was holding onto his pain for motivation. That was why Eren was not giving him an answer right away. That was why Eren had somehow convinced Levi to train him. Eren was not keeping him on a string because he was unsure of the potential to try the relationship again, he was doing it because he could not make amends with the enemy.

"Fuck," Jean whispered, running his fingers through his hair. A smile played at his lips. Looking back now, it was obvious all along, and with that in mind, Jean realized that he did, in fact, have a chance with Eren.

With the positive conclusion jubilantly dancing in his mind, Jean quickly gathered his things, making sure that he had an entry form for Eren, and dashed to his car. As he did so, he reviewed the events of the past fortnight over and over again, and the more he thought of it, the more it made sense. He had a chance. If only he and Eren could break the ice on an official stage, Eren would have no need to hold onto that animosity. If the animosity could go, then…

"I really do have a chance," Jean said to himself as he started his car with every intention of driving directly to Eren's apartment.

* * *

 **Thanks again for sticking around. As always, your thoughts are always welcome. ^.^**

 **OS**


	21. Chapter 21: Come Over

**A/N: Can you believe it's already November? The year had flown by incredibly quickly!**

* * *

 _ **Levi (22:46):**_ _Why aren't you answering your phone?_

Eren stared at his phone as he took a breather in the kitchen. This was his first idle moment in the past four hours, and he was quite taken aback to have found five missed calls and a text message from Levi when he unlocked his phone. Levi had been trying to call him for two hours, and had sent the text an hour after the last attempt, which was nearly an hour ago.

 _ **Eren (23:39):**_ _I'm at work._

With a sigh, Eren slipped his phone back into the pocket of his neatly pressed trousers. Wearing the smart tuxedo in the blazing summer heat was bad enough, but wearing it on a summer's night serving a function of nearly seventy heads was just plain torture. While they were not nearly understaffed for the event – on the contrary, Mr Smith was kind enough to have brought in extra help for the event, which was why Eren was working tonight – the clients were _demanding_. Fortunately, they were not rude, which was their only saving grace, and despite the copious amounts of liquor that they continuously demanded, expecting lightning-fast service, they were polite and very generous tippers.

 _ **Levi (23:41):**_ _Come over?_

Eren blinked rapidly for a moment before rereading those two words a dozen times over again. Why, for the love of all things holy, would Levi ask him to come over? Ever since the morning after their brief, heated encounter, the morning that saw Levi spew a confession Eren would never have thought would come from the man, they had barely spoken. Their interactions had been formal at best, but mostly detached – their afternoons were nothing more than a simple greeting, an exchange of pleasantries, and training sessions that were mostly Eren trying to hold in his complaints and Levi whipping out every sadistic trick in the book to try and make Eren break.

Why then, after a week like that, would Levi want Eren to "come over"?

"Someone send nudes?" Armin asked as he joined Eren. He brushed his hair out of his face, letting out a long breath and shaking his head from side to side, completely missing Eren's dumbfounded expression.

Sometimes Eren forgot that Armin, despite being an intelligent and quiet young man, was also but a boy at heart.

"The crowd's thinning out," Armin said when Eren did not reply. "Only about a dozen left, and we just did last call."

Eren wasn't paying attention to Armin at all. He was somewhere between trying to figure out why Levi would want him to visit, and what to say to the man in reply. This left him staring at his phone as if there really were something of nude interest that had him dumbfounded.

"Earth to Eren," Armin said, waving his hand between Eren's face and his phone.

This snapped the brunette out of it. With a rapid couple of blinks of his eyelids, he turned his head to find his amused best friend staring at him with an eyebrow cocked. Eren had to admit, Armin had matured quite gracefully. In his teens, Armin was short and slim, but as a young adult, Armin had added a few inches to his height and a few pounds to his frame, still boasting a lithe figure but one that was more athletic than one would have imagined for the sedentary blonde.

"What?" Eren asked.

"What's gotten you so focused on your phone?" Armin asked. He leaned in closer as if he were trying to look at Eren's screen. "Must be one hell of a dick-pic."

"Armin!" Eren snapped, jerking his phone away.

While the blonde did not know enough about Levi Ackerman to care much for the scandal that would come from the star's sexual orientation, everyone who so much as knew Eren's last name knew that the brunette was obsessed with Levi. Armin would easily deduce who the contact "Levi" on Eren's phone was, given that neither of them knew or had ever met any other Levis before.

Eren could not afford to let Armin see what was on his phone.

"What are you hiding?" Armin asked with a knowing smirk. This cockiness was unlike Armin.

Just then, another waitress marched into the kitchen and grabbed Armin, demanding that he help her carry whiskey glasses for the bottle a group of men had just bought. While Eren was relieved to be free of the interrogation, the fact that another bottle had just been bought meant that he may be in for a long night.

 _ **Eren (23:55):**_ _Still at work._

Eren locked his phone and was about to slip it into his pocket so that he could help the other waiters, but before he could, his phone buzzed in his hand.

 _That was fast,_ he thought, as he unlocked his phone again.

 _ **Levi (23:56):**_ _Till?_

 _ **Eren (23:56):**_ _Depends when the last people leave._

This time, Eren put his phone away and hurried to the bar to help his colleagues. He felt his phone vibrating in his pocket as a message came through from Levi barely a minute after he'd sent his last text, but he ignored it. Levi could wait, and in making the man wait, he could figure out what was going on.

Maybe there was nothing more to it. Maybe Levi just wanted to see Eren. After all, the man hadn't replied when Eren said he wouldn't be coming to training due to work. Then again, why would Levi only call after seven, call persistently, and then eventually text…not to mention inviting him over at this ungodly hour? Usually when a man did that, it meant only one thing, but Eren knew that Levi did not want that one thing. Or at least, he did not want _just_ that one thing.

Unless Levi had reconsidered…

Eren ignored the cheers of the group of men who were behaving like a bunch of teenage boys rather than grown men in their fifties, possibly sixties, and after delivering two bottles of Glen Fiddich 18 year old whiskey to the group, he bolted back to the kitchen. Once there, he yanked his phone from his pocket and was completely unsurprised to find a text from Levi.

 _ **Levi (23:57):**_ _Come afterwards._

 _ **Eren (00:07):**_ _It'll be too late. I doubt I'll knock off before 2._

Armin's voice broke into Eren's bubble then. "Is that who I think it is?"

Eren jolted at the sudden sound, quickly locking his phone to hide the text. He could only hope that Armin was bluffing and that he hadn't seen the name on the screen, but given the curious glint in the blonde's eyes, Eren knew that Armin had seen more than he was supposed to. It made Eren wonder just how long Armin had been standing beside him, and how much his friend had seen.

"Nothing," Eren said. He felt his phone vibrate in his hand and he fought the urge to check the message.

"Is that the MMA Levi?" Armin asked casually. The sudden change in tone made Eren suspicious.

"Maybe."

Grinning, Armin said, "So you got his number?"

There truly was no use in lying to Armin. Although Eren had no intention of telling his friend the entire story – and had no right to, in fact, it could potentially put Levi in a situation that could prematurely end his career – he figured that telling Armin about the training was harmless. As a matter of fact, Eren should tell Armin about it! It was a major feat, and quite the progressive step towards him becoming better at something he liked. As his best friend, Armin should be happy for him.

After telling Armin a truncated version of how he had procured Levi as a personal trainer – obviously skimming over the parts where Levi had caught him in compromising positions and definitely the part where he and Levi had been in a compromising position themselves – Eren told the lie, "So I'm telling him I can't train tomorrow morning because I'll be stuck here till late."

Armin bought it easily enough. Eren had never been good at lying. Whether it was because he had an overactive conscience or because he was incapable of tracking the details in a falsified story, he would never know, but from childhood, lying did not come naturally to him. In his adult years, however, he learnt that "lying", "manipulating the truth" and "omitting" where completely different. By "omitting", Eren was able to hide more without outright lying. It clearly worked.

"I hope you hand Jean his ass when you fight him," Armin said.

"He asked for a second chance," Eren said without thinking. Had it been anyone else, he would have regretted the confession, but it being Armin, he only smiled apologetically.

Armin's eyes widened. "What?" Eren nodded. "When?"

"A couple of weeks back," the brunette said nonchalantly.

A subtle warning flashed in Armin's eyes as he glared at Eren with a ferocity he usually never possessed. It was strange to see those gentle blue eyes so threatening, but as Armin got bigger – and more attractive – his confidence rose. Slightly, but it rose some.

"You better not have said yes," Armin threatened.

"Of course not." Eren scowled as he realized that Armin did not know about the uncountable times Jean had mistreated him after the breakup. He relaxed his features before offering up a little smile. "I'm not going to make that mistake again."

Or would he? Or rather, why would he not? Was he unwilling to give Jean a second chance because he was curious about what Levi had to offer? Or was he unwilling to give Jean that chance because what Jean had done was brutal, uncalled for and plain fucked up? Was he…in fact, Eren would be lying if he said he was completely unwilling to give Jean that chance. He did, after all, say that he would think about it. Was that just lip service?

"We can start clearing up," one of the other waitresses said as she popped her head in through the kitchen doors, "it looks like the old boys club is taking the whiskey home."

"Thank goodness!" Armin said, darting out of the kitchen.

Before following, Eren reached for his phone to see what Levi had said last. Twenty five minutes ago, Levi sent one word.

 _Please._

Dumbfounded, Eren stared at the inoffensive word as if it suddenly possessed the greatest meaning in linguistics. While he did not think Levi was particularly rude – brash and tactless, but not a morally-devoid dimwit – he never imagined the man would so solemnly use the word "please". Was it even solemnly used, or did Eren imagine that?

Just then, his phone rang. It was Levi.

"Hello?" Eren answered almost immediately.

"Eren," Levi said. He sounded raspy. "Where are you?"

"Still at work," Eren answered.

"Come over."

"Levi, I'm tired. I want to go…"

"Eren, please."

Eren balked. It was not solemnity he had seen in that single word, it was pure _desperation_. That desperation bled out of Levi's tone, that single word almost begged. Something was not right. Levi was not okay, but why would he call Eren? The two hardly knew each other…did Levi not have friends? Was the famed fighter lonely?

"Sure," Eren eventually said. It was probably not as dire as he imagined it to be, but if his idol was lonely, the least he could do, as a fan, was to fill the void.

"Come to the dojo," Levi said.

"At this time?" Eren said, his thoughts verbalized.

"Yes."

Without giving Eren time to respond, Levi hung up. The brunette stared at his phone for a second, wondering just what the hell was going on. Not only was Levi inviting him to visit at an ungodly hour, but the man was obviously _desperate_ for said visit, and quite insistent on the location being the dojo. Yes, he owned it, but wasn't going to the dojo at this time of the night a little…weird?

Something was definitely wrong. For that reason only, Eren decided he would go to the dojo as soon as he knocked off.

* * *

 _What am I doing?_

Those words ran through Eren's mind over and over again as he ascended the stairs to the dojo at 02:30 in the morning. After a grueling shift at Smith's – the tips were more than worth it, though – he bid farewell to his childhood friend with the guise that he would be heading home. On the contrary, Eren thought as he got into his car and made his way straight to the dojo, he was chasing after a man with questionable desires and intentions.

Relieved of the tuxedo jacket, and bowtie, Eren was left wearing a smart white shirt, now untucked and creased, and his trousers that were, surprisingly, still crease and grease free. He wondered what he looked like to the sleeping world, walking down the ill-lit, desolate passageway at this time of the night dressed as he was. Did he look like a runaway groom? He smiled to himself as he thought that that would be the first thing he would think if he saw himself right now.

The dojo was unlocked.

To a normal person, this would have been a red flag. Even Eren had to admit it was incredibly strange to have received such demanding texts that quickly became desperate, to meet him at the dojo at this time of the night. For a moment, he wondered if someone had forced Levi's into luring Eren here to be the victim of a gang heist – although no gang would target him, being a mere student. Perhaps…Eren's blood ran cold as he pondered the possibility of being lured here by homophobes wanting to purge the world of gay. With fists at the ready, heart rate slowly rising as he expected the worst, Eren pushed the dojo door open and cautiously ventured inside, locking the door behind him.

If he were to get in a fight, he would at least like to trap his assailants in an area he knew, an area filled with implements that could deal some damage.

Most of the lights were off; only a few burned dimly at the very back. It gave the dojo an eerie feeling – lines of punching bags looked like lifeless bodies dangling from the ceiling, the open ring looked a black pit in the corner, the cage, shrouded in shadow looked like a beast was contained within it. But what made the dojo even eerier was the rhythmic beating coming from the back. It was a sound Eren instantly recognized as the sound of bare skin pounding against a weighty bag, and as he drew nearer to the sound, he could hear the tell-tale sounds of exertion as sharp breaths accompanied the dull thuds.

This couldn't be a trap. This was too elaborate. No one would spend this much energy trying to catch his undivided attention. This didn't mean he could lower his guard. Eren treaded forward quietly, until the person beating the bag came into view.

Eren stopped. His heart nearly stopped as well.

Levi Ackerman was beating the bag as if it had wronged those nearest and dearest to him. Wearing only a short pair of shorts with no wraps on his hands or feet, Levi threw well-coordinated punches and kicks at the bag with a velocity and ferocity that was both impressive and frightening. Given his state – heaving, huffing, panting and sweating torrentially – he had been at it for a while, which only made the strength and speed in each blow all the more impressive.

Why was he here, though? Why was he attacking the bag as if he had a vendetta against it?

Looking closely at the raven-haired man, Eren then noticed the blood. _A lot_ of blood. It was smeared on the bag, pooled and smudged on the floor and splattered around the walls surrounding the bag. Most of the blood, however, was on Levi's body. His hands, especially his knuckles, were _raw_. There barely seemed to be any skin left on them at all. His elbows, feet and shins also lacked skin, although not nearly as much as his hands.

For a moment, Eren panicked, wondering if there had been a fight. But as he drew closer to Levi, he noted that while there was a lot of blood on and around the man, there was not enough to be lethal. There was nowhere near enough blood to have been from an attack, let alone another person. The blood he was seeing…it was from Levi.

The man stopped mid-jab. Fierce eyes darted to Eren, rooting the brunette in place with a gasp – that glare was one Eren had seen before, but never on a man. That was the look an animal gave another when its territory was being encroached upon, when it was being challenged for a mate, or when its spawn was threatened. The look in Levi's eyes was downright inhuman, and for a moment, Eren genuinely feared for his life.

Was this it? Was this the point Levi would snap? Eren had made a very bold advance on him, and since then, they had barely spoken. Granted, Levi made a confession that very clearly implied he wanted _something_ with Eren, but had that been lip service? Had that been a ruse to get the boy out of his home? Had Levi been contemplating Eren's advance all week, and tonight decided that he would obliterate the little faggot once and for all?

Eren began trembling. He shook like a pup before a beast, an unarmed man pitted against a dragon. If he had less control of himself in that moment, he would have likely pissed in his pants. The way Levi was looking at him was not the way a person looked at another human being. It was the way a beast looked at something that needed to be destroyed, vermin that needed to be erased.

Having been at the receiving end of fists as the torments of "faggot" and "queer" were spat in his face, Eren knew the look of a man who was escalating into a violent state. If there was one thing, even if only for self-preservation, that Eren could immediately and unmistakably place, was a man losing his control on rationality and succumbing to the instinctive need to purge something considered a threat.

And then Levi began walking towards him.

Those greys were focused sharply on him like the eyes of a predator that had cornered its prey. No, not even. They were trained on Eren like the eyes of a predator that had already secured the kill and now only needed to deal the final blow. Those eyes, those sharp, grey hues that Eren loved, worshiped, fantasized about and even came to, were now the chains that would hold him down as he met his untimely end.

Yet despite knowing what was coming, he could not move. The door was only ten meters from where he was, but he could not make that move. It was locked, but if he got there before Levi, he could open it and run.

Run where? Levi was stronger, faster and a better fighter than him. No matter what he did, he would get caught.

And killed.

"L-Levi…" Eren whimpered as Levi came to stand but a breath in front of him.

His heart was threatening to break out of his chest. He wanted to throw up. He wanted to tear his skin off his body. Anything! He just did not want to be here, watching Levi's arm raise slowly, painfully slowly as if the man was tormenting him.

Closing his eyes, Eren waited for the blow. He waited for the first in a chain that would undoubtedly be the last beating of his life.

* * *

 **Happy Halloween yesterday, for everyone. ^.^**

 **OS**


	22. Chapter 22: Breaking Point

**A/N: Sometimes I feel like I like cliffhangers a little too much...**

 **Thanks for the ongoing support, guys and gals. Especially the reviews...whenever I post a chapter, I look forward to reading the reviews and when I do, they make my day. Even though there appears to be some sort of love-hate relationship between us right now :P  
**

 **Enjoy ^.^**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

 **8 HOURS EARLIER**

It was inevitable, but it was not pleasant. Levi knew that getting involved with Petra would bring him to this day eventually – like buying puppy or a kitten, claiming ownership of a woman when he was gay and she straight, was only inviting an inevitable day of heartache into his life. Of course, he hadn't anticipated he would become _this_ attached to Petra, but who was he kidding? He may be rough around the edges, but he was the kind of man that cared. And when he cared, he cared deeply and unconditionally, and because of that when he hurt, it was earth-shattering.

"I want you to keep it," Levi said, frowning as he looked at the collar in Petra's delicate hands.

It was beautiful. A thin, pink leather band lined with diamonds and studs. It had neither a name tag on it, nor a loop for one. It was not a pet's collar, but rather the collar of someone who chose to wear one as a proud symbol of her trust in him.

"I think you'd have more of a sentimental place for it than me," she said. Guilt rose up those warm, brown eyes as she continued, her voice barely above a whisper. "I don't think Auruo wants something that will remind him of your ownership."

That hurt. A decade of playing together, a decade of building a relationship so deeply rooted in trust that he could get behind the car blindfolded and trust her to direct him, gone. A new man, someone who could finally provide the little things she needed that other men couldn't, and suddenly, everything they had was redundant. She was willing to throw it away, and all reminders of it, for a piece of meat who was willing to spank her as well.

 _It's not like that_ , Levi thought with a silent sneer.

Petra wasn't like that. She was not being inconsiderate or disrespectful to what they had. If he looked her right in her eye, he could see that she hated this as well. She wanted to keep her collar, the aged reminder of a time she discovered herself and eventually learnt to love herself. She wanted to keep the band that would forever represent the hold she had on this life, when all else was threatening to pull her away.

But she was right. She no longer belonged to Levi, and he had to respect that. If he were to be honest, if the roles were reversed, he wouldn't want his partner to keep the collar of their previous Dom. Even if it was sentimental.

"Thank you, Petra," he said with such forced sincerity he wanted to laugh. Petra frowned at this, but said nothing. Of course she would have noticed. Levi sighed. "Really, thank you. I just…"

Just what? There was no excuse and absolutely nothing to explain. In fact, why did he feel he need to explain? Was it not normal to feel empty after losing something that had been constant in one's life for nearly a decade? Of course it was normal, but Levi never considered himself to be normal. It was that, he concluded, that had him feeling this way.

"Levi, it's alright," Petra assured, her soft hand moving to cup his cheek. "I'm sad too, you know. I'm a little broken inside, to be honest."

Levi raised a brow. "You're doing a damn good job at hiding it."

"I learnt from the best," Petra said with a smile. A genuine smile. A breath-taking smile that Levi fell in love with…but only as a friend.

Oh he tried. He tried so damn hard to love her. She had loved him once. She would have made a wonderful wife, a perfect partner – beautiful, funny, intelligent, kind, yet kinky, adventurous and mischievous. She was everything Levi could have hoped for, except the packaging was a bit inconvenient. Try as he may, he could not get it up. He was simply not attracted to women.

He wondered not if he had not tried hard enough. Looking at her, he found absolutely nothing sexually appealing about her. Yes, she was damn gorgeous, but not the kind of gorgeous he wanted pressed against the wall. He would never find her attractive in that way, and he accepted that a long time ago. He just hoped that maybe, just maybe, he had been wrong that time.

Although, even if he had, it was too late now. She was over him and in love with another man. A man that was going to take her as his own, in every way imaginable.

Auruo was going to own Petra, like Levi had. And more. In ways that Levi wished to own Eren.

Levi smiled weakly before saying. "Glad to be of service, ma'am."

"Oh, Levi," Petra said. Her eyes were sad despite the smile on her lips. "You really are incredible, you know?"

Levi clicked his tongue. It was incredible how well Petra read him. He never could quite understand how she did it, because he was the furthest thing from an open book, but she saw right through him. She could see he was in turmoil.

"Incredibly bland," Levi said. He took the collar from Petra's hand and placed it on his lap underneath the table. She would never see it, but as soon as his hand was out of sight, he clutched it as if it were his lifeline. "I have to get going."

"I understand," Petra said. Those warm hues darkened as sadness swelled in them, and it made Levi's heart clench.

This was not easy for him at all, but he couldn't discredit the fact that it must be just as difficult for Petra. Even though she had a new lover and a new Dom waiting for her, she would have to be one heartless bitch to feel nothing for ending this after so long. Her heart was breaking, and Levi could see it, but for once, he could do nothing about it. For once, it was not his place.

Auruo was a good man, and he could trust Petra, and her heart, in his hands.

Rising to his feet, Levi nodded. "I'll see you around."

"Oh, don't be such a stiff!" Petra scolded as she darted around the table and wrapped her arms around Levi.

For a moment, he stayed absolutely still. The smell of the sweet coastal summer assaulted his nose as Petra's warmth wrapped around him. He liked it. He would miss this. He would miss her. Eventually, Levi wrapped his arms around Petra's shoulders, pulling her against his body and feeling her relax in the embrace and smile against his chest as he did so. Levi wondered if Petra thought he wouldn't return the hug, and for a brief moment, he was tempted to call her out on it. The only reason he didn't was because he needed to leave. He could feel the darkness welling up inside of him; the all-consuming tsunami of abandonment was rising and rapidly travelling to the shoreline of his mind.

Petra could not see him break. Not today.

"Don't be a stranger, Levi," Petra whispered. "If you're still up for it…I'd still like it if you could show Auruo a thing or two. Especially with ropes."

Levi couldn't help but smile. He had been left, but would not be forgotten for as long as he was needed. "Sure," he said. "You have my number."

With that, he pulled out of the embrace. He gave Petra one last gaze, a gaze that an outsider would have easily mistaken for a lover's gaze, especially since it was followed by a soft kiss to her forehead.

"Till then, take care," Levi whispered. "And call me if the bastard fucks up."

Petra giggled childishly. "I'll keep you on speed dial."

As long as she knew that he had her back, his mind could be at ease. Of course, this did not mean he would never see her again. She made it clear that she wanted him to teach her Dom some things, but Levi would not be the one making those advances. If Petra wanted him in her and Auruo's life, she would be the one doing the calling. It was not being spiteful or bitter, rather, it was being respectful – if Petra were to call, it would be because she _and_ Auruo felt ready. The last thing Levi wanted was for Petra's new relationship to suffer because of baggage from a past one.

And then he left. He walked away, and as soon as he took that first step, the first drops of that tsunami were already breaking through the seal. Like a pot boiling on a stove with the lid shut, his edges were saturated and dripping as the pressure built higher and higher deep within his core, rising with tidal might and pushing to break the fine facade he had worn moments earlier.

Soon, it would blow. He was moments away from exploding, from breaking, and try as he may, he could not hold it back. The breaking of his sanity had become inevitable, and all Levi could do now was weather the storm. It would eventually pass – he just needed to let it out, to think rationally about his loss and process the reasons for it, and once that was done, he could work on a way forward.

For that, he needed an anchor.

Whipping out his phone, Levi punched in the number of the first person he could think of – Farlan. Just before he hit dial, though, he stopped – it was a Friday night. Farlan and Isabel were likely spending some time together after a long week. The last thing Levi wanted to do was impose on the couple's time together. With a sigh, he locked his phone again, picking up his pace to his car.

He may need an anchor, but he was not going to bring anyone down with him.

As soon as Levi slid behind the wheel and had his car locked, he noticed his phone was unlocked. This time, his thumb was hovering over Eren's contact. When did that happen? Levi thought back to his short walk and realized that he had not authorized his body to search for that contact, but before he could berate himself for that, his damned autopilot went and dialed the brat's number.

As soon as he noticed the phone ringing, he hung up, cussing out loud. Why bother calling Eren? Eren would never understand what he was going through, even if he explained it in excruciating detail. Nobody would understand, unless they were in the scene themselves. In fact, even those in the thick of it would be at a loss – Levi somehow doubted people stayed playmates for this long and had it end. What could a wet-eared brat like Eren possibly be able to do to comfort him?

 _A distraction. A fuck._

Levi pushed that vile thought to the back of his mind. He had explicitly said to Eren he did not just want to fuck – he wanted more, and would not take what Eren was offering unless he could offer everything Levi wanted – and Levi would not falter on his resolve because of a fleeting feeling. The need to be comforted, the need to be held and kept sane would pass, but if he were to fuck Eren, the repercussions would last much longer than the post-orgasmic bliss of a night of unrestrained pleasure.

Yet despite this, Levi found himself dialling Eren's number again. With no consent, his thumb inched forward and pressed call once more. Only this time, Levi did not hang up immediately. This time, as the phone rang, Levi spent the time trying to convince himself that he did not just want to fuck Eren, that perhaps there was more to this call than that.

Which was, of course, false.

Levi hung up again. He was a mere man, one that was broken, abandoned and in desperate need of affirmation. What he wanted from Eren was just that – affirmation.

This went on for two hours. Levi would fall victim to his desperation, call Eren, and after an eternity of ringing, during which he would bargain with himself in a futile attempt to hide his true intentions, he would hang up. He would berate himself for his childish and quite frankly disgusting behaviour, which would leave him pacified for a moment, and eventually the cycle would repeat itself.

He hated this! He hated being a slave to his instincts and being led along on a leash by sheer desperation. It was absolutely maddening! To know he could be this weak, after years of building up insurmountable strength that millions looked up to…Levi wanted to laugh. What would his fans think of him if they saw him like this? What would Eren think if he saw him now?

His phone buzzed then. Levi was quick to unlock it, and when he saw the text on his screen, he nodded in understanding.

 _ **Eren (23:39):**_ _I'm at work._

That would explain why Eren was not answering his phone. For a fleeting moment, Levi felt like an absolute idiot; what the hell was Eren thinking, having seen all those calls. Come to think about it, how many calls had Levi made?

Before checking his call log, he noted that he had texted Eren as well. He wanted to cringe at the demanding text sent some time earlier, but he did not dwell on it; there was no use in crying over spilt milk, and that what he had lost, he could not redeem. Now he could only hope that Eren did not think he was a desperate stalker.

Eren's replies were sporadic, which left Levi frustrated. One moment the brat would respond immediately, and the next, he would take up to half an hour to respond. It was, of course, due to work, so Levi respected the time constraints, but respecting them didn't make them any less irksome. It felt like he was awaiting for the decision after an interview for a life-changing job, and every minute that ticked by was pure agony – ants crawling under his skin, his lungs burning as they suddenly lost their full capacity, his muscles aching, mouth dry and head pounding as a splitting headache threatened to erupt.

He had to leave. He could not sit around in his apartment like this and wait and hope for some kid to come to his rescue.

Putting it like that…Levi shook his head with a humorless laugh as he realized how damn pathetic he was being. At thirty years old, he was relying on a man eight years his junior as an emotional crutch.

No, that wouldn't do.

Gathering up his things, Levi made for the dojo. He would work this out like he did when he was alone, using physical brutality.

That resolve lasted all but twenty minutes. Levi had barely started beating the bag when he felt that acidic burn rushing through his veins that had him obsessively calling Eren yet again. This time, however, there was no agitation or impatience. This time, as Eren said he did not want to come, Levi threw his dignity to the dirt and begged.

Levi Ackerman, a world renowned sportsman, begged a novice kid to see him.

He hated that he'd stooped so low, but what else could he do? Who else could he turn to? He needed a form of intimacy that only Eren could give, and though he knew he should not pursue that avenue, he was quickly reaching a point where his pain was unbearable and he'd rather suffer months of repercussions of this night than fight the pain alone.

"Pathetic!" Levi roared as he lashed out at the bag.

How dare he? What the hell gave him the right to be so weak? Because he was _human_ and humans had weaknesses? He wanted to scoff at that. Sure, he was human and there was nothing he could do about that, but just because one was born a certain way it didn't mean one was destined to die that way.

What was that old argument? Ah, nature versus nurture.

Nature hadn't blessed him with the greatest scope of emotions, and nature and definitely not been generous in his capability to deal with them. Nurture…well, that was one fuck up he did not need to revisit.

So then, if both ends of the argument had him destined to be an emotionless prick, then why was he falling apart like this?

Simple. He loved Petra.

Not like a man loves a woman he wants to marry, but the way a man loves something that he would give up his life to protect. Something like his family, his children, his career, his legacy…Levi loved Petra as if she were his to love. He protected her as if she would break without his shadowing her, he nurtured her and helped her grow from her weakest moments and raised her into a graceful and elegant swan, a woman filled with power and divinity that no man could conquer. He helped her up when she fell, ran alongside her and gave her the confidence to fly. Levi did not make Petra strong; Petra found her strength through the freedom Levi gave her. She learnt not to fear regret. She learnt how to be frightful and independent but still kind and loving. And in that growth, she learnt exactly what she wanted in a man, and when she stopped chasing scoundrels, she found a decent man; a man that would be the wind beneath her wings.

Levi could no longer give Petra what he used to. All he had done in the past years had culminated into the perfect woman, gift wrapped for another man. That was not a problem, on the contrary, it was expected given the platonic nature of their relationship. That, however, did not make the pill any easier to swallow. The two of them shared an incredibly deep and special bond, one that Petra would now be growing with Auruo as not only her partner but as her dominant.

Auruo would take Levi's place and take up places that Levi would never have been able to even if he tortured himself to do it, and that…that was what made him feel like a failure.

 _Failure. I've failed._

Shaking his head violently to try and dispel that enraging though, Levi caught sight of a figure lurking in the shadows. He immediately turned to it; already consumed with rage and violence, he could only pray that it was not an intruder because ending his career with a guilty sentencing of homicide would not be the ideal way to go.

The figure did not advance, which meant it was no threat. That did little to pacify Levi, so he kept staring, waiting. The figure did not retreat either, which meant the person had no intention of leaving. Who could it be? Narrowing his eyes, Levi began stalking forward into the darkness. Ready to murder a man at a moment's notice, Levi kept his fists balled tightly, ready to fight for his life. He may have been trembling with fatigue, but Levi knew how to disarm a man not only from hand-combat and defensive training, but also thanks to the world's best, yet cruelest teacher – experience.

As he curled his fingers in on one another, he was oblivious to the blood dripping from his wrists, but he felt the pleasant sting of his raw flesh being kissed by the cool, early morning air. For a moment he cringed at the thought of his raw flesh coming into contact with a filthy criminal's body, one that would be spewing blood and other fluids if this came to a fight. He would kill the bastard twice if he were an infected drug-rat.

Nearing the figure, Levi could make out tousled hair. The hair was dark, but not as dark as his own, so it couldn't be black. Brown, maybe? Then there was the frame – masculine, strong and lithe, but also somewhat familiar.

 _Eren?_

It could be…he had phoned, had he not? He had begged, had he not? Eren said he would come. Eren came. Eren was here.

Relief started washing through Levi, but that edging violence deep within him was barely contained. He was still in pain, still incredibly livid at himself, yet despite this, seeing those emerald eyes as he came to stand before Eren kept those negative emotions at bay. Barely, but it was more than he'd had in the last few hours.

Eren was here. The brunette looked terrified, but at least he was here.

Without saying a word, Levi raised one bloody hand and placed it at the back of Eren's head and pulled Eren towards him. With a gasp, the brunette stumbled forward awkwardly, just barely regaining his balance before Levi delicately pressed their foreheads together. Levi let out a long breath, one he did not realize he was holding, and he closed his eyes as he quietly thanked Eren for coming.

Even he was shocked at the sincerity in his voice. Its depths were so great that that barely contained negativity got pushed further back. Numbness threatened to fill the quickly forming void, but the man would take it; anything to be rid of that consuming rage. In fact, numbness was just another step in his process.

"Levi…" Eren whispered, breath washing over Levi's face. It was apparent that Eren had recently drunk something grape flavored, and Levi quickly decided he liked how it smelt on Eren's breath. "What the hell are you doing here at this time?"

* * *

 **Thanks for the read. Do I get a prize if I finish this before Christmas? :P**

 **OS**


	23. Chapter 23: The First Step

**A/N: Thanks for the very positive feedback on the last chapter! Since this one is done, I decided to post it sooner rather than later.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

Eren's heart was still beating in his chest. It took him a moment to realize that the blow he was expecting never came, and that what had happened was merely the desperate grasp of a man overboard finding a buoy, and the most heartfelt 'thank you' Eren had heard in his twenty-two years. Yet despite the gravity of the moment, Eren couldn't ignore the entirety of it all – the clock was quickly nearing three in the morning, yet Levi was at the dojo, half-naked and covered in blood with possibly more skin on the punching bag than on his own fists. Something was horribly wrong; everything about this moment was unlike Levi! Eren may not know Levi as well as those in his inner circle, but what the brunette did know was that Levi was not the kind of man to beg, lean on and sincerely thank others for the very things he begged for.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Eren snapped.

He did not mean for it to come out as aggressively as it had, but damn it, he would not apologize. He was tired, his body was sore, and with his parasympathetic nervous system quickly bringing him down from his high state of mental arousal, the fatigue only doubled. He could feel himself beginning to tremble as he dropped from the sudden high, and within seconds he became hyper-aware of how cold the dojo really was.

 _Is that Levi's blood running down my neck?_

"It's almost three in the morning," Eren continued.

A long silence followed. Eren had to fight to resist jerking away from Levi. The sensation of three droplets of blood slowly seeping down his neck and cooling as they came into contact with the night air was enough to make Eren shudder, but that was not the only reason he wanted to recoil. He wanted to jerk away from Levi so that he could position himself to give the man a blow to the face. The man's unresponsiveness was unnerving at best, but more irritating than unnerving, and Eren was sorely tempted to take the risk and punch the champion fighter.

"I know," Levi eventually whispered. "Just…thank you for coming."

He sounded…broken. It sounded like there was something he'd been trying desperately to hold back for an insurmountable passage of time that was threatening to rise up. His voice shook as he tried to hold his façade, but it was too late; whatever he was trying to hold down had already started bubbling out of his lips like the disease of a rabid animal.

That broke Eren – the aggression from moments ago was long forgotten as he felt the weight of his idol's burdens crash down upon him like a tsunami engulfing an anthill. Eren may not have been the most sympathetic, empathetic or emotionally intelligent person, but there was one thing that Eren was fierce in that made up for all those shortcomings – he was protective.

Without thinking, he wrapped his arms around the shorter man's shoulders and pulled Levi close to him. Met with no resistance, Levi's body was flush with Eren's in a heartbeat. The heat radiating off the man's body penetrated Eren's shirt as his sweat quickly saturated the material, but Eren didn't care. Levi needed him, and he would be there in whatever way he could until Levi yelled at him or kicked him out.

Neither was a far-fetched possibility.

Despite the probability, neither came to pass. While Levi made no attempt to hug back whatsoever – in fact his arms had fallen limply by his side as Eren embraced him – he made no attempt to distance himself from the brunette either. He simply stayed in place as Eren hugged him.

What could possibly have put Levi in this state? To the world, the man seemed infallible, with an impenetrable emotional fortress that left the world wondering if the man had any emotions behind those massive walls he constructed. Of course this was all a ruse, though. No human being could possibly be entirely emotionless…could they? Even if only anger, excitement or narcissism…a person had to feel _something_ , right? So what was it that had triggered Levi to behave like this?

Eren did not know the man exceptionally well. On the contrary; every conversation they held left Eren with more questions than answers. He was simply too respectful of Levi's boundaries – and too afraid for his personal well-being – to seek clarification. Although despite this, Eren knew Levi better now than he ever had. Years ago, he knew only what the TV and the tabloids said. After joining Titan Dojo, Eren quietly observed the man and learnt more about him and his quirks. When they eventually became acquainted, Eren could add more familiarity to his list. All of that, unfortunately, did not equate to truly _knowing_ Levi Ackerman.

What Eren had learnt in his time with the man, though, was that Levi was as human as anyone else. He felt pain, anger and frustration just as he felt joy, intrigue and excitement. So, like any other human, he could break. Right now, Levi was broken. Even the strongest men need a crutch sometimes, and Eren was honored to be able to be that, even if he did not know why.

The pair stood in a silent embrace for longer than Eren dared note. The extreme heat from Levi's body had already begun to lessen, and the man's breathing had begun to even out. Levi was calming down.

"Let's get you cleaned up," Eren said softly, before cautiously stepping back. His eyes ran the length of Levi's body. "You're bleeding everywhere."

At that, Levi's head snapped up. It was like he'd heard a gunshot. Suddenly, the man was alert, eyes frantically scanning his surroundings until they found what they sought: a trail of blood. Those steely greys narrowed as if they had found the enemy that had defiled his mother and his lips visibly twitched as he snarled.

"Filthy," Levi spat under his breath. He turned his attention back to Eren. "Let's get this shit cleaned up."

"You first," Eren said.

"That wasn't a suggestion, Yeager," Levi said.

It was Eren's eyes that narrowed this time. "No."

Levi seemed taken aback by that word, but strangely enough, it seemed to dissipate his anger instantly. He seemed…intrigued? This only piqued Eren's interest further, but now was not the time to dwell on that. Eren had to find a middle ground, and quickly, because Levi was in an unnaturally emotionally volatile state, and a less than savoury physical state. He may not have been the most diplomatic person at the tender age of twenty-two, but Eren at least had some idea on how to negotiate.

"Let's just…get you cleaned up real quick and then we can clean up this mess, alright?" Eren suggested with as charming a smile as he could muster.

* * *

Levi sat silently as Eren tended to his wounds. They were superficial and did not require a lot of cleaning or attention, but Eren handled them delicately as if one wrong move could bring Levi a world pain. His long, latex-clad fingers worked dexterously and delicately as they cleaned each abrasion thoroughly before applying ointment and band aids or gauze where necessary, working with such professionalism that one would swear he did this for a living. Did Eren not once mention that his sister was a paramedic?

As the young man worked, Levi's eyes eventually strayed from the impressive dance of long, strong fingers and lifted to gaze upon the eyes of the young fighter. Despite how coordinated his fingers were, Eren's brows were furrowed with the concentration of a senior taking their final year-end exam. The focus in those dark emerald orbs was second to none, and Levi may have imagined it in the dim lighting but he thought he saw just the tip of Eren's tongue poking out of the corner of the his mouth.

The thing Levi appreciated most in this moment was the silence. Eren did not once attempt to make small talk and hadn't once asked what was wrong, lulling the older man into a state of comfort that left him feeling quite relaxed at Eren's touch. He could see the brunette was tempted to talk – Eren's lips twitched once or twice as if he were losing control over his ability to keep his mouth shut, but even then he relented.

This was the kind of behaviour Eren would get rewarded for…if he were Levi's, that is.

Once his wounds had been sufficiently covered, the two men got to work cleaning the mess in the dojo. It was a silent affair, with the only noise being the soothing sounds of bristles dancing across the floor. Levi glanced over at Eren every few minutes to ensure that the brat was doing his job up to standard, and every time his eyes found the boy, he was pleasantly surprised to see Eren tending to each defiled spot with impressive attention and vigor. At this rate, Eren would be cleaning to a standard that would well satisfy the older man.

The two eventually met again at the punching bag. It looked like something a butcher, or a murderer, would use to clean his knife. Not only were there blood smears and splatters littering the dark leather, but there were trails of blood running down its length and chunks of _skin_ caught amidst the mess.

"I'll get this," Levi said. It was the first time they'd spoken since they'd started cleaning. "Why don't you go get yourself cleaned up?"

Eren shook his head with a yawn. "I'll just shower at home."

Levi eyed Eren for a moment before turning his attention to the bag and beginning the final stage of the clean-up. In that moment, Levi wondered how a brat as obstinate as Eren could be so tender and selfless. The boy was a walking oxymoron and that showed more and more with each day – hell, Eren had been talking to his pig-ex Kirstein every day before training and Levi was not beyond admitting that that pissed him off. Yet despite the daily pleasantries, Eren had explicitly said that there was and wouldn't again be something between him and that man.

Or was that lip-service? Better yet…had Levi truly convinced Eren that he was unable to give him what he needed, which left Eren to settle for what he knew he could get?

Clenching his jaw, Levi began to scrub furiously at the punching bag. The theory wasn't implausible.

 _Not now, damn it_ , Levi thought, fighting tooth and nail to keep the new wave of pained anger at bay. He had _just_ calmed down. He could not lose his composure, not _again_.

Eren's wristwatch beeped then. A heavy sigh shortly followed, stealing Levi's attention. He noted Eren staring at that watch, lips moving as if he were calculating.

"What, brat?" Levi asked.

"Nothing," Eren said. He looked up at Levi, his eyes heavy. It was picturesque, the perfect image of boyhood innocence, and it made Levi want to own Eren in every way a man could legally own another human being. "It's just a little late."

Levi's brows furrowed. How could he have been so selfish? "Do you have plans tomorrow?"

Eren huffed. "You mean later today?" He shook his head. "No, I was probably just going to make excuses to not study. At least now I can sleep."

Nodding, Levi turned to survey the dojo. It was spotless. All the evidence of his bloodshed had been removed; even Eren's bit was done spectacularly. Levi could not deny that he was impressed by the boy's cleaning capabilities. Although despite what the eyes could no longer see, the blood had been shed – Levi idly wondered what his beloved dojo would look like if a forensic investigator took the liberty of taking luminol to the walls, floor and bags. He was sure the place would light up like an amusement park at sunset, a thought that very nearly brought a smile to his lips.

"Thanks for helping me, brat," Levi said. "You didn't have to."

Said brat raised a brow. "You were kind of insistent on the phone."

"I asked you to come over, not to be my fucking cleaning crew."

Eren smiled at this. Levi may have imagined it, but there was something in the youngster's eyes akin to relief and recognition. Before Levi could place it, Eren moved to gather all the cleaning supplies he and Levi had used before making his way to the locker rooms to store said items. Levi left the boy, instead using the time to gather his own personal items and redress himself appropriately. The early morning air had a bit of a bite to it.

When the locker room door opened, Levi didn't give Eren a chance to speak before he said, "Come home with me."

The brunette's pace slowed, tired eyes narrowing suspiciously as he closed the distance between himself and Levi.

Levi would never say it out loud, but he hated how Eren associated his apartment with negativity. That apartment was his own sanctuary, and had been a sanctuary to many in his life, yet not to the one he wished it to be. Eren's apprehension did not come without good reason, though, and perhaps that was what irked Levi the most. What irked him was that there was a very valid reason for the brunette to feel the way he did – every single time he had come to Levi's apartment, something bad had happened. Every time, something was left hanging in the air. That air had to be cleared.

"Please," Levi amended. "I would like to talk to you."

"About what?" Eren asked cautiously, his tone bordering on impolite.

The older man sighed. If there was one thing he had learnt about Eren in their brief acquaintanceship, it was that the brunette did not do anything without incentive. Like any typical young brat, if there was nothing in it for them, they had no interest in pursuing it. If he wanted Eren's attention, he would have to entice the youngster. He would entice Eren, but he would not lie.

"It's about what I want from you," Levi said. He sighed as he watched the realization dawn upon Eren. "I may have been a bit quick to judge what you can and can't give me. I was unfair in my assumption and I think that I should give you the facts straight, so that you can decide for yourself if it's something you want to pursue or not."

Yes, he had grossly underestimated the brat. At first glance, Eren seemed very two-dimensional. He was attractive, and it was obvious to even an outsider that he had a spitfire personality. Argumentative, yet sociable, Eren enjoyed being the center of attention and had a competitiveness to him that often brought him to failure. Levi had also learnt that Eren was a pleasure-seeker, or a thrill-seeker, though he wasn't entirely sure which as yet. However, upon closer inspection, a third and possibly a fourth dimension presented itself. Eren was sensitive and somewhat insecure. He was tender, kind and caring, yet at the same time protective. He was thorough in his workmanship and that alone was enough to convince Levi that maybe, just maybe, the brat held a streak mature enough to be able to give Levi the man wanted.

"Are you…" Eren pointed at Levi and then himself. "Are you saying there's a possibility that we could work something out? You _do_ want me?"

Levi's brows drew together as he glared at Eren, stepping closer to the boy in an indication that Eren had his absolute undivided attention. "Eren. Since the first time you walked in through these dojo doors, I wanted you. I wanted nothing more than to brand your skin in my unique way." Levi noticed how Eren's gaze dropped to his lips momentarily before those unfocused emerald hues found his own again. "I wanted nothing more than to mark you as mine, and to scar you far beyond the dermis. I wanted to be the one to tattoo your very soul. I have never in my life had a want so powerful that I would admit to myself that it is a _need_. I don't _want_ you, Eren. I…"

"You need me?" Eren questioned before Levi could finish.

Damn, that sweet scent was still lingering on Eren's breath, and that coupled with the slurred words and the lust-drunk look in those dark yet surprisingly innocent eyes had Levi's jaw clenching as he took a step back. Now was not the time. So instead of confirm or deny Eren's assumption, Levi simply continued speaking.

"I can't tell you that you can't give me what I want without really telling you what it is I want," Levi said. He grabbed his bag and swung it over his shoulder. "I'm asking you to come home with me so that we can talk when we are both rested. I will tell you what I want, and then you can decide if you want to put up with that shit or run back to Kirstein."

Eren's drunken demeanour instantly dissipated – Levi had clearly struck a chord. It never ceased to amaze the man how quickly the teen's mood could change.

"I'm not going back to that prick!" Eren snapped.

"And I don't want to be a conquest for a twenty-something-year-old. I'm not a kid, Eren. I need commitment." Levi walked by Eren then, making his way to the door. He had laid the bait down, extended the information, now what would happen next was entirely up to Eren. Once again, the ball was in the younger man's court.

The brunette laughed humourlessly before turning to follow behind Levi. "And you don't think I do?"

When Levi arrived at the dojo door, he paused and eyed Eren. There was nothing in the boy's expression or demeanour that indicated untruth. In fact, Eren looked aggressively desperate, as if Levi's understanding of his seriousness was vital to his survival. Levi could not understand why it was that Eren was trying so hard to convince him of his sincerity, but he decided not to question it. Instead, he nodded and swung the door open.

"I take it that means you're coming home with me," Levi said.

"Yes," Eren said. "We do need to talk."

"After we sleep."

* * *

 **The end of the year is almost upon us. I will try and do as much writing as I can in the next three weeks, as come December 12th I am jetting off to USA for holiday. I have yet to decide if my writing materials will be joining me on the trip or not.**

 **It's a day early but Happy Thanksgiving :D**

 **Anyway, folks, you know what to do. ^.^**

 **OS**


	24. Chapter 24: The Talk

**A/N: This one is a little longer, but I felt that it just went together. Hopefully the love-hate relationship we have can move a little more to love know (you know who you are!).**

 **On a side note, this story has gone in a direction I hadn't expected. By now, I expected a bit more action but sometimes a story just starts moving at its own pace. I can only hope my readers are not too frustrated with it, as I, admittedly, am anxious to get to the juicy parts. However, we cannot rush the process. So thank you for sticking by, supporting and reviewing.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

Eren followed Levi in his own car as the two men made their way to Levi's home. As he drove, Eren wondered if Levi would talk with him when they arrived at the apartment. As much as he wanted to hear what Levi had to say, he was too exhausted to even entertain the thought of the conversation to come. He hoped Levi would have some discretion and suggest this conversation be had later on; Eren trusted Levi was at least decent enough to do just that.

Besides, Levi did not look like he was in the right frame of mind to be having any serious conversations.

That brought up a thought: there was something _very_ wrong with Levi. The man was nothing shy of an absolute wreck when Eren had found him, something he had never imagined he would ever see on the man. Levi had this unwavering confidence about him, this certainty that every challenge life would ever throw him would be met with a giant "fuck you". Levi was powerful, not only physically but psychologically as well, and in that he had become the master of all that he was, and in that, he had grown to be silent and stoic.

However, no matter how stoic Levi was, he was still human. Humans, inevitably, felt, and in that feeling, sometimes they fell, and sometimes they broke. Whatever it was that had made Levi fall all but brought him to his knees – what Eren had seen may have been startling, frightening even, but there was a familiarity in that pain that Eren could not only recognize but easily relate to. Whatever was wrong with Levi, Eren would be there for him; even if he never found out why, Levi needed someone and had reached out to Eren, so Eren would be the crutch Levi needed. Even if it meant being on his hands and knees scrubbing the dojo floor at an ungodly hour, Eren would be there.

Once they arrived at Levi's apartment, Eren couldn't help but feel dread pooling in his stomach. He had had an unpleasant experience one too many times here, even if he had brought it upon himself. It was as if he were waiting for something to go wrong – either he would inevitably step out of line and irk Levi, or Levi would lash out at him with no provocation (which, given Levi's state, was far from impossible). Yet despite the unease consuming him, Eren pressed on. Hopefully, he would be in bed soon, and with the new day would come new feelings, and hopefully much needed answers. All he had to do was make it to bed, and he would be safe.

Or would he?

Levi's eyes were on him, watching his every move. The gaze, though, was not one filled with suspicion or even seeking confrontation – there was concern in those tired grey orbs as they tracked Eren's every move. Levi watched Eren as one would watch an injured wild animal, desperate to approach but uncertain of what approach would be the safest. Eren idly wondered if Levi was concerned about the same thing he was, if Levi was also afraid of what may happen next between them in this place.

Of course, nothing happened. Their arrival was uneventful at best – Levi showed Eren to the bathroom, this time with both a towel and clothes, before disappearing into his own room, presumably with an en-suite bathroom. Unlike the last time Eren had showered here, there were no arousing thoughts and thus nothing came of his ten minutes under the revitalizing jet of water. In fact, Eren had to fight to keep himself awake the entire time. Once clean, dried and dressed, Eren sauntered out of the bathroom in search of Levi to say goodnight. He was moments away from falling over, and a beep on his wristwatch told him that four o' clock had come.

 _Did I shower with this on_? Eren wondered as he fidgeted with the watch.

He was not sure if he was imagining it, but he swore he could hear the feint sounds of birds chirping outside the window.

Eren found Levi in the kitchen. The man was slowly nursing a glass of water, eyes unfocused as they stared unseeingly before him, completely oblivious to all that was around him. For a long moment, Eren could not help but just stand and stare at Levi, marveling at the perfection that was presented before him. Levi's body was perfect: his muscles were large and defined, perfectly proportionate to his height and definition pointed enough to be noticed but not so much so that he looked like an anatomy model. He looked like a man committed to his image, a man who had sculpted his body through years of clean hard work and perseverance. In this light, however, those muscles stood out a little more; the valleys between their glorious peaks were deepened as shadows engulfed them, and with a few stray droplets still clinging to Levi's milky skin, the image presented to Eren looked like the cover of a magazine.

Yet despite the flawless man before him, Eren was not staring at Levi lustfully. Instead, his eyes were raking the length of the man's body, partly marveling its perfection but mostly wondering what it was that had Levi's usually proud posture somewhat slumped over and defeated. A part of Eren knew that he would likely never know what had driven Levi to behave the way he did tonight, but he would always wonder.

"Eren," Levi whispered.

It was only then that Eren realized he'd been caught staring, but he could not care less. He blinked his eyes back into focus, but his vision remained blurred; exhaustion was assaulting him with relentless perseverance, and he reckoned he had minutes, at best, before he would collapse.

"I'm heading to bed," Eren announced, his voice much deeper than it usually was, thanks to the fatigue. "I'm bushed."

Levi nodded once before placing the empty water glass in the sink. He said nothing, eyes staying fixed on the floor as he walked towards Eren. For a moment, Eren considered just turning and making his way to the guest bedroom, but he was curious; something about Levi's demeanor said that the man wanted to say something. Eren was too damn curious to let it be, exhaustion be damned.

Levi eventually spoke – when his lifeless, grey orbs lifted to meet Eren's exhausted emerald hues, there was an unspoken desperation in them that was reiterated by the pleading undertone in his voice that would have gone unnoticed to Eren had he not seen what he had seen of Levi tonight. However, it was not that barely concealed cry for help that caught Eren off guard…it was what Levi said.

"Sleep with me."

There was no room for argument or discussion. In fact, there was not even room for consideration. As soon as those words left Levi's lips, the man made his way down the passage towards his bedroom, leaving his door ajar as an invitation. Those words, however, had Eren balk – of course Levi had not meant anything sexual, which Eren reckoned would have likely stunned him less. Levi Ackerman did not look like the kind of person to seek company in his bed, sexually and especially not non-sexually. So to have him want that, to see him throw the last shred of his dignity to the dirt and to ask, no, _beg_ for one last thing…

 _How can I say no?_

It must have taken a gargantuan effort from the man to have done that. Eren could not decline the heartfelt request. Hell, why would he? He had been alone in his bed for months as well, and he hated it. He hated the cold spot beside him, the emptiness where someone once used to lay. Eren hated it because not only was it empty, not only did that gap drive home the fact that he was _alone_ , but it also rubbed in his face what he had lost. That emptiness was a blessing before he had fallen in love, and once there, a body – the body of the man he loved – was all he yearned for in bed every night. Of course, when that ended, so the presence disappeared, never to return. He hated that empty spot in his bed because he knew how incredible it was to have had it filled.

As Eren slipped into bed beside Levi – who was lying with his back to the brunette, arms around his body as if protecting himself from the cold – he wondered if he wanted this because he missed the familiarity of a person beside him, if he craved some sort of affection, or if he missed and craved Jean. He did not want to think about that right now, but he couldn't help where his tired, weak mind wandered to as he tentatively shifted closer to Levi; close enough to feel the man's warmth, but not too close as to be reprimanded. Did Eren want this, and like this, because it was with Levi, or because it reminded him of Jean?

That thought plagued his mind, but the young man was quick to fall asleep. Exhaustion dragged him under like a demon dragging a soul to hell, and Eren did little to fight it. He simply let go, allowing the warmth of Levi's presence to lull him into a state of security that he had not felt in a long time.

* * *

It had been years since Levi had woken beside someone, longer since that he had woken beside someone in his own bed. Levi had never been one to chase tail – even in his wilder youth as he found himself spiraling down a very dark path riddled with drugs and violence, Levi had never been one to seek physical intimacy with others. Perhaps it was because he found humans filthy and the thought of sticking it into an orifice that would likely be disease-riddled put him off. Maybe he was scared to seek intimacy because he had known from a young age he was gay, and the men he associated with did not take kind to homosexuality. Whatever the reasons, Levi stayed away from people as best he could, although even he had his limits – in drug-induced stupors, Levi would find himself succumbing to desires that left him feeling filthy, used and regretful in the morning.

That was a long time ago.

This was something different. The man in bed beside him had not been a drugged up accidental fuck. The young man whose tousled brown hair was painfully endearing and those usually fierce features now calm and set in the perfect image of boyhood innocence, was not someone who was trying to con him, use him or abuse him. The young man, Eren Yeager, had been the anchor he sought, through to the end. Eren had been there, grounding Levi, allowing him to slowly piece back his sanity little by little until he felt safe and free, until he could finally succumb to sleep. The man beside him had helped him, not attempted to destroy him for selfish gain.

Levi smiled a little as he observed the brunette. He recalled the moment he felt the bed shift as Eren came to sleep beside him. An inexplicable calmness settled over him as Eren awkwardly shuffled about beside him, obviously trying to find a comfortable spot without offending him. It was somewhat amusing, really, but the youngster was too tired to worry about the politics of personal space and very quickly succumbed. As Eren's breathing evened out, it set a rhythm for Levi to follow, and the man found himself deep asleep barely minutes after Eren.

H

He had not slept that soundly in weeks. As Levi made his way to the bathroom to freshen up and take care of the essential functions, he found himself surprisingly well-rested despite only having had four hours of sleep. After the emotionally torturous day he had had, and the hours of exertion on the bag thereafter, Levi was surprised that he had not only slept so short, but so well.

Not only had Eren lulled him off to a beautiful sleep, but not once had Levi found himself tempted to fuck the brat. Of course, he wasn't going to deny the thought had crossed his mind earlier in the day – hell, at a point he was _desperate_ for some sort of distraction or reaffirmation, and what better way to get both then sex? – but when it all came to a point, he never acted on that thought. In fact, that thought never even resurfaced, despite having the gorgeous young brunette half-naked in bed with him.

 _Damn, that brat really is something_.

As Levi whipped up a creamy seafood pasta – Eren had only mentioned being allergic to bees, as far as his memory served him – Levi found himself thinking more and more fondly of the boy. Last night, rather, this morning, was all the proof Levi needed that he could maintain his composure around Eren. He had not lost control and devolved into the kind of man he both loathed and feared becoming, despite having had that thought more than once that day. He had not touched Eren once, not even hinted at it, yet he spent hours in bed beside the beautiful brunette.

If Levi could control himself around Eren in his weakest moments, why the hell would he not be able to maintain his composure in moments of play?

Today, come hell or high water, Levi would talk to Eren. If he had thought that he had wanted Eren before, he was sorely deluded – he had realized now, he did not just want Eren, he _needed_ the brat.

Levi reached for the lid of the pan that he had placed beside the stove, and as he did so, an unpleasantly warm, somewhat electric impulse shot through his arm. At first, he thought nothing of it; he flinched and promptly shook it off, covering the simmering pan before flexing his fingers. The band aids Eren had so carefully placed on his knuckles had been torn off, revealing the extent of the damage of his temper tantrum – his knuckles were raw. He would be lucky if he would be able to punch anything in the next two weeks.

Then it hit him.

 _Fuck!_

Jumping back away from the pan, Levi lifted his arm experimentally as the realization dawned upon him that if his knuckles were done for, his shoulder was more than likely ruined. A loud expletive tore from Levi's mouth as pain second to none tore through his shoulder, the searing agony racing along every nerve from his shoulder, across his back and neck, and down through to his fingertips. It was unbearable to the point where Levi could no longer hold his arm elevated; it fell to his side, flopping uselessly as he pinched his eyes shut and drew in a deep breath to will the pain away.

Weeks of rehabilitative therapy...gone.

"Fucking hell," Levi growled as his other hand came to press against his shoulder.

He didn't have much hope of competing in the next few weeks before this, but his rehabilitation had been going well. Now he was right back to square one. His original injury had flared up with a vengeance, and for a fleeting moment, Levi feared he may need surgery – it was almost needed the first time, and that was not quite as painful as now.

"Fucking idiot!" Levi spat, before returning to the pan.

How could he have been so juvenile? How could he have let his emotions rule him to the point where he negated his physicality – the very physicality that put the bread on his table – to the point of being rendered useless again? He had _just_ praised himself for his incredible self-control around Eren Yeager, but had that self-control come with a price? Was he only able to control himself because by the time Eren had come, he had already let himself go?

"Levi?"

Levi's eyes snapped up at the sleepy call of his name, and his mental barrage immediately stopped as his gaze rested upon what looked to be a very concerned Eren Yeager. The brunette's brows were furrowed over his worried eyes, posture awkward as if he were ready to pounce at a moment's notice but holding back for fear of Levi.

 _Why would he be scared of me?_ Levi wondered.

"Is everything okay?" Eren asked.

Usually, Levi would dismiss the question. He detested petty conversation, especially when a person tried to pry into his well-being. Levi did not like being doted upon by others, and he loathed being fussed over when something was awry. When people tried to get into that sacred ring of his, he shut down and shoved people away with the force of two super-magnets coming negative-to-negative. However, just as he was about to do just that, Levi realized, or rather _remembered_ , that what he wanted from and with Eren transcended a normality and would require the obliteration of many personal boundaries – if he wanted Eren to trust him, he would have to be more open with Eren than other people.

"I re-injured my shoulder," Levi simply said. He did not need to offer up further explanation.

"I'm not surprised," Eren said. "You were going at that bag like there was a title on the line."

Levi realized then that he hadn't asked Eren just how much he had seen.

A long moment of silence passed. Unsure of what to say to Eren, and Eren seemingly either unsure of what to say to Levi, or not in the mood to talk further, simply began to meander about the kitchen in search of coffee. Levi pointed to the sugar and the creamer, but Eren had made himself at home. It seemed odd, and usually Levi would be quite irked by someone moving freely about his space, but for some reason he liked seeing Eren move about his home in this way. It fostered the hope that maybe the negativity associated with this place would dissipate soon, that Eren was becoming comfortable in Levi's sanctuary.

"You want coffee?" Eren asked, as the water in the kettle came to a boil.

"Yes please," Levi answered. "Two coffee, no sugar or milk."

Eren hummed in acknowledgement and quickly got to work. In a minute, Levi was presented with a mug of coffee that looked rich and frothy, and he quietly thanked Eren for the drink before the brunette leaned against the coffee to sip his own caffeinated drink.

Levi knew it was only a matter of time before Eren brought up the inevitable.

"So," Eren tried after a few minutes.

As much as Levi wanted to avoid the conversation, he could not. Not only that, but he _would_ not. He had not only promised Eren he'd talk to him, but he had also come to a conclusion on his own that he had to have the boy. One way or another. That did not make it any easier, though. This was a conversation Levi had not had with another person in a good decade, and now that he was faced with having to do it again, it became quite apparent that he had absolutely no idea where to begin.

"I don't know where to begin," Levi admitted.

Eren shrugged. He seemed unfazed by Levi's admission. "Let's start with what you want from me."

Oh, this brat. Levi shot a sideways glance at Eren, the flirt of a smirk touching his lips as he said, "That is exactly what I don't know how to begin to explain."

In the short time that Levi had gotten to know Eren Yeager, Levi had learnt a few core things about the brat. Firstly, Eren did not give up. He had impressive perseverance, or rather, was borderline obstinate. Secondly, Eren liked a trade. Even though he did not seem like a negotiator, Eren was one to work for reward. Thirdly, Eren was forward. Eren liked to understand things on a simple level. Levi had just never realized how two-dimensional the brat could be.

"Well, do you want me or not?" Eren asked.

Two-dimensional questions would earn two-dimensional answers. "I want you."

Nodding, Eren said, "That's a start. Why?"

"What do you mean, 'why'?" Levi snapped. He turned off the stove; the pasta was ready.

Eren sighed. "I want you, you know that. I want to fuck you, because you are genuinely one of the hottest men I have ever seen. But I don't just want to fuck you. I want _you_ , Levi, all of you. To date, whatever, because you are a good guy, and I think being with you would make me happy. So, if you asked me why I want you, it's because I think you can make me happy. And after last night…I think I can make you happy too."

And that was where the third dimension returned.

"Being with you would make me happy," Levi said. He had not expected such a rant from Eren, and had to wrack his mind to conjure up the appropriate response without scaring the twenty-two year old off. "It would be complicated, though."

Eren laughed humourlessly. "Obviously. You're an international sporting icon. I'm a college kid fighting to make ends meet and fantasizing about being something more than just a BSc-grad in a couple of months. We're worlds apart."

BSc? Levi had never bothered asking Eren what he was studying, but he never pinned Eren for the type to study in the science field. He noted that he would have to ask Eren more about that at a more appropriate time. For now, though, there was a much more pressing matter at hand.

This was it. It was now or never.

"That's not what would make it complicated," Levi admitted. Eren seemed somewhat perplexed by this, drawing a mildly exasperated sigh from the older man. "Being with me would…be difficult. And different…for the reasons you mentioned. But I'm…complicated. I want something complicated, and it's something most men cannot give me."

 _That sounded stupid, idiot_ , Levi berated himself, cringing at how uncertain he had sounded at every pause.

"So you _are_ gay?" Eren asked.

The audacious brat!

Levi narrowed his eyes. "Is that topic currently on the table, Yeager?"

Folding his arms across his chest, Eren nodded once, scowling furiously as if _daring_ Levi to challenge him.

 _Daring me? I will rip you to shreds, kid!_

"Yes," Eren snapped. "If I am playing this field I at least deserve to know who my opponents are."

 _Touché_.

"Yes," Levi admitted begrudgingly.

Nodding, Eren took a moment to process this. Levi may have imagined it, but if that was a smirk he saw pulling at Eren's lips he was ready to smack it clean off. He knew exactly what Eren was thinking.

"So…what is it that you want that's so complicated?"

Was it always this hard to say that word? _Submissive_? So widely misunderstood, yet so simple. It was only three syllables, but for some reason the single word was heavier than a ton of bricks. Levi drew in a deep breath; he could not afford to let that weight hold his tongue down. Eren wanted direct answers, so he would get them.

"I want a submissive," Levi said.

"Like...BDSM?" Eren asked.

"Yes," Levi answered Eren opened his mouth to speak again, Levi held up a finger and said, "I want a submissive and a lover. I want someone who can give me both independently."

"How?"

This is where it got complicated. Or did it just seem more complicated than it was because Levi was desperate to make the pitch as perfect as possible, so that Eren _would_ say yes?

"I want a lover, Eren. Someone to live with and whom I can do lover shit with. Eat, fuck, fight, the usual."

"You sound like a great lover," Eren grumbled.

Ignoring the brat's comment, Levi continued, "But I want a submissive to play with. When the time is right, when the collar is on, I want someone I can wholly dominate. I don't want the two to coincide. I'm not here to live the lifestyle twenty-four-seven, but I do want it to be a big part of my relationship."

Levi watched as Eren considered what he had just said. The brunette did not just appear to be digesting those words…he seemed to be deeply considering them.

"What's the difference?" he eventually asked. Levi gestured for him to continue. "Like…dating someone and being their Dominant. What's the difference? Why don't you want it to coincide?"

The brat seemed interested. This was a very good thing.

"Dating is dating. I'm sure even a brat like you gets what dating entails." Levi pointedly glared at Eren, inciting a quiet hiss from the brunette. Oh, Eren's spitfire personality would be perfect! "Playing…a Dom-sub relationship is different. There are rules and protocols to not only give you the perfect experience, but to keep you safe. It's impractical, at least for me, to live by rules like that in a normal relationship. So I want someone to be with, and someone whom I can enjoy playing with too."

"And that someone is me?"

Smirking, Levi said, "Presumptuous, aren't we?"

Eren met Levi's cockiness ounce for ounce. "You admitted you want me. You admitted you want a submissive. I can put two and two together, Levi."

Sighing, Levi turned his attention to the food cooling on the stove. He was quite hungry, and he knew this conversation was going to be a long one. If it went as he hoped it would, then it could turn into quite a lengthy negotiation as well. He did not want to invest all the time and energy if all the preliminary conditions were not cleared.

Eren was interested. That much was obvious, so that condition was cleared.

Eren was single, although Eren's feelings towards his ex-lover were questionable and would need to be further explored. That could be done another time. Eren's feelings towards Jean seemed hostile, which cleared the condition that Eren may very well be available.

Lastly, Levi needed to ascertain how long Eren would be able to commit for. That would be the final deciding factor. Levi did not want someone to fuck around with for a few months and then bid them farewell. Both his submissives had been in his life for years, and if he were going to go that route again, he wanted to reach the same, or even a greater crescendo, as he did with the ladies.

He may have not wanted to scare Eren away, but he could not afford to beat around the bush. Levi wanted commitment; if he was going to invest his time, energy and heart into someone, he wanted it to be for the last damn time.

Eventually, Levi turned back to Eren. "Look, brat. I'm thirty. I don't have the time or the desire to fuck around anymore. I want to settle down. If I am going to be with someone, I want to give them my all and I expect them to do the same for me. I'm not going to settle for some second-rate fuckboy who just wants to get his kicks or pass time. I don't just want a relationship; I want someone who will commit to spend their life with me.

Pushing himself off from the counter, Eren turned and looked at Levi with eyes drowning in exhaustion, but it was not exhaustion brought on from physical fatigue. It was deep-seeded, an abyssal emotional void that spewed from Eren's core and bled out into those expressive orbs – Levi had not seen eyes that aged in a man as young as Eren in all his years.

"Me too, Levi, me too."

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 **I hope you enjoyed that. Anyone here listen to Danheim? It's some good music, and proved to be very grounding when editing this chapter.**

 **You lovelies know what to do. ;)**

 **OS**


	25. Chapter 25: The Talk Cont

**A/N: As always, thanks for positive feedback on the last chapter :) Thank you for your patience and enthusiasm, every single one of you readers, followers and reviewers. The show is finally on the road!**

 **Now may you sit back and relax, and enjoy the following chapter :D**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

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Eren had always believed Jean Kirstein was the one.

Never to be one to believe in love at first sight, Eren would be lying if he said it was _that_ instantaneous. However, he did want to fuck Jean from the first moment he'd laid eyes on the slightly taller, more experienced fighter. Watching Jean fight for the first time, the way his body moved, the power and precision in his strikes…it was enough to have the novice drooling. Yet when pitted against the pompous fighter, Eren became livid at the man's cockiness…but he would be lying if he said it was not a turn on. That smugness, although it enraged the young novice, made him want to do things to Jean Kirstein that would be borderline illegal. He wanted to put that cocky fucker in his place and get maximum satisfaction out of it.

And once was not enough.

Again and again, Eren ate of the fruit but was never full. Despite Jean being able to satiate Eren's lust completely, satisfying the novice's needs and leaving him full and exhausted every time, something about Jean had Eren always hungry for more. It was a vicious cycle, like a disease, where Jean was all Eren needed but even in being everything it was never enough. This constant hunger only grew, and none too soon, Eren found himself falling in love with that pompous idiot. When it happened, those in his life vehemently protested his relationship, saying that the foundation of it was weak. Of course, Eren disagreed; what he and Jean had was powerful and filled with passion, but only now did Eren realize it was passion of the wrong kind.

Looking back now, the signs were painfully obvious. Eren was Jean's first male lover, which obviously made the novice feel accomplished and quite frankly smug. What the novice never considered was the fact that this may have simply meant that what they had was nothing more than a phase for the otherwise heterosexual man. Also, Jean had little interest in couple's activities; any sort of date was not high on the man's priority list, and one could absolutely forget about any form of romance. Then of course the dismissive behavior, which Eren likened to "Jean being Jean". Only, that dismissive attitude became downright evasive as time went on, but the love-struck novice thought nothing of it and continued to give everything to Jean, giving until there was nothing left to give.

Yet in spite of it all, Eren thought they were perfect together.

So when Jean left Eren, Eren was shattered. He had never dealt with heartache before, and he said then if he ever had to go through something as agonizing as that again, he'd much rather throw himself off a bridge. Of course, those words were spoken when emotions were running high, but the betrayal and the hurt was enough to put Eren off pursuing any form of relationship in favor of begging Jean for a second chance. Rather the devil you know, he reckoned. In this instance, the bastard you love.

Looking back now, it was pathetic, really.

For a long time, Eren was lost and distracted. It took him weeks to realize that his aimless meandering through the barren wasteland called life was eerily familiar. It was not the first time Eren had found himself directionless, only this time, the consequences thereof seemed graver; as an adult, losing his sanity could put him in a very dire situation. He took a moment to reflect, to remember what it was that had helped him in that dark period of his life, and when he remembered being inspired by Levi Ackerman, he turned to that hope. The man, his idol, who had come from nothing, who had lived a life filled with nothing but heartache, betrayal and violence, had become such an overwhelming success that his life now must have made the hardships forgettable. If Levi could go through all of that, surely Eren could go through a stupid little heartbreak.

It may have devastated him, but he would be damned if he let it kill him.

Why was all of this coming out now? Why was Eren rehashing the embarrassing tale of how he'd fallen for a man's seduction and been broken by it? Why, of all things, did he confess to looking for Levi Ackerman's guidance through the worst of it?

If Eren could, he would stop himself. But as his story flowed from his mouth, it was as if he had lost all control of his body. In fact, it seemed as though he were sitting on the opposite side of the room, watching himself speak to a man who seemed deathly interested in his story. Despite having given much more detail than was acceptable to give a prospective lover about an ex, Levi seemed hungry to know it all – when Eren summarized, Levi asked for details, when Eren was unclear, the man sought clarification. Levi's interest in Eren's past was strange to say the least, but the brunette thought nothing more of it, simply grateful that, for the first time since his heart had been cruelly broken, he was able to let it _all_ out.

Eren even went so far as to admitting that Jean had asked him for a second chance. Of course, he hadn't outright admitted that he had said to Jean that he would consider it, but he was truthful in that he had not flat-out said "no" at that time. To that, Levi scowled slightly, and for the first time in what felt like an hour, the man spoke.

"Am I going to be competing against Kirstein?"

Eren opened his mouth to say no, but one look from Levi and he knew that he had to answer this question very carefully. While it was painfully obvious that he wanted Levi – whatever it is Levi was willing to give – Eren could not deny the fact that he had, at a stage, loved Jean, and still did. He could not deny that he was not entirely over Jean. While his venture with Levi would by no means be a rebound, especially considering the seriousness of what it was Levi wanted, it would be unfair on the man to enter into something unhealed.

 _I did want to just fuck around_ , Eren reminded himself, but that was before he learnt Levi's true intentions. He had mistakenly thought Levi was the kind of man to use his looks, status and money to get what he wanted, and had that been the case, a brief affair may have been on the books. What Levi wanted, however, was forever.

It was a lot to ask.

The brunette sighed. He wanted forever, too. Despite his tender age, he wanted a fairy-tale romance with his Prince Charming who would love him 'till death do them part. Did he think Jean was that prince? At a stage, he wondered. Could Levi be him? Who knows? But…with Levi guaranteeing trying to give him that forever – being more mature and emotionally stable – was it even worth it trying to stick around and see if Jean had changed?

"I don't think so," Eren said.

Levi leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest, his eyes contemplative as they seemed to size Eren up. The younger man wondered what was going through Levi's mind, but did not push. The silence persisted, and despite Eren itching to break it, he knew he had to give Levi time to process all that he had said.

Eventually, Levi said, "You aren't over him, that much is obvious. What I want to know is would you seek him out, if you had someone else?"

Was Levi asking if he would cheat? Eren scowled at this, the temptation to spit his offence making his tongue sting. Instead, he clenched his jaw and balled his hands into fists – Levi was older, more mature, and if Eren wanted to win, and keep, his favor, he would have to reciprocate that maturity.

So, as hard as it was to maintain his composure, Eren simply said, "No."

Levi nodded thoughtfully, but said nothing further.

"You're right, I'm not entirely over him," Eren admitted, his venomous spite now contained. "Honestly, if you weren't in the picture, I would have considered going back to him." To this, the raven-haired fighter raised a brow. Ignoring the unsettling feeling in his stomach, Eren continued with his admission. Something about Levi told Eren that the man liked to know the undiluted truth, as sinister as it may be. "Like I said, I tried getting him back for months. But after meeting you…especially after what happened between us, I started to wonder if I even want to waste my time with that dick."

Levi raised a brow. "Pun intentional?"

It took a moment for Eren to realize what Levi meant, and when he did, he blushed lightly and averted his eyes with a shy smile. He found it sweet that Levi would attempt to lighten the mood.

"I didn't know what you wanted from me," Eren said honestly. He caught Levi's gaze again, and pondered the curiosity in those mysterious greys. "Obviously it wasn't just sex…you made that pretty clear. That was when I realized that it might be more, and if that was the case, it was…" Eren bit his lip, brows furrowing yet again as he fought to find the words to say it without it sounding as harsh as it did in his mind.

"Either him or me," Levi stated bluntly, saying the words Eren tried avoiding. The brunette nodded tentatively. "Tell me…what can he give you that I can't?"

To this, Eren gawked slightly. It seemed like a cocky question, as if Levi believed he had the right and ability to grant Eren anything he desired, and the audacity to flaunt that fact.

Levi quickly reacted to Eren's gawking. "If it's between him and me, there must be pros and cons to each of us."

Of course there were pros and cons, but Eren hadn't even begun to weigh them up. Nevertheless, he decided he would answer Levi to the best of his ability. If he spoke without too much thought, would his words not be the unbridled truth, unobstructed by fantasy?

"Obviously he hurt me, so that's his biggest con. He hurt me a lot, not just by leaving me but by treating me, well…" Eren gestured lamely in the air, referring to the night Levi had caught him throwing away the last shred of his dignity in a parking lot. Valentine's Day. The older man nodded for Eren to continue, eyes not betraying his thoughts. "The pro…I love him. Not as much now as I used to, but there is something there, and it will be easy to get into it. He's uh…also great in bed." Eren blushed a bit as he said that, but Levi only snorted. When Eren glanced at the man, he saw Levi schooling his expression, but what he caught a glimpse of riled up his curiosity about the man – he saw challenge, as if Levi _knew_ he would be even better.

"My pros and cons?" Levi asked.

"I don't know you. You don't know me. What if we are incompatible and never fall in love? It will have been wasted."

"We should get to know each other then."

"Our lifestyles are worlds apart. We've spoken about that already."

Levi narrowed his eyes. "Yes."

"What if I can't give you want you want?"

"Are there _any_ pros, brat?" Levi asked. Eren may have imagined it, but there seemed to be a hint of insecurity in Levi's voice.

"I _really_ want you." Eren smiled, despite Levi's unimpressed glare. "You want me too. And I believe that I can give you what you want…" Eren bit his lip subtly, wondering if he should be bold and say what was on his mind. He decided to throw caution to the wind. "I think I can give you what most other men can't."

This piqued Levi's interest. He raised a delicate brow, the interest in his eyes unconcealed as he shifted forward, intertwining his fingers with one another as he came to lean his elbows on the table separating them. "And what, pray tell, may that be?"

"The perfect submissive."

Levi had clearly not expected that. The smugness in the man's features disappeared in the blink of an eye, shock left in its wake. Eren had never wished for the ability to read minds as hard as he did now.

After a minute, Levi schooled his expression and said, "If you are willing to work towards that, you are already more than halfway there."

Eren nodded. He did not have a reply to those words, nor did he have anything more to say. The rest was up to Levi – if the man believed he could take a "brat" as a lover, Eren was more than willing to give it a shot. What happened with Jean…if Levi treated him right, his wounds would heal and he would forget about Jean in no time. And something was telling Eren that the man before him would do more than _just_ treat him right.

"I don't want to compete with a wet-eared brat, Eren," Levi said, obviously referring to Jean. "Like I said, I am thirty. I don't have time for games."

"I'm not going to play games with you," Eren said, tensing up as he spoke. "You know, if we do decide to do this, I'm going to be doing a lot of things for the first time. I don't really know a lot about your kinks and shit, but I do know that shit takes a lot of trust."

Levi smirked. "You have no idea."

"So…" Eren shrugged, shaking his head. "I'm not going to fuck around with someone else if I am going to be with you."

"And do you want to be with me, Eren?" Levi asked, his tone somewhat sultry. It made Eren swallow thickly as his eyes flickered to Levi's lips, the urge to kiss them suddenly at the forefront of his mind. "Do you want me or Jean?"

As if in a trance, Eren mechanically answered, "You." A second later, his blinked, eyes flitting up to meet Levi's. "I want you, Levi."

Levi nodded, a pleased smirk on his face. Without saying a word, he stood, gathering both his and Eren's dishes from lunch and making his way to the kitchen. Eren followed behind him, considering offering to help with the dishes, but missing his opportunity as Levi made a beeline for the sink and starting filling it up with dish-washing soap and water.

"Thanks for lunch," Eren mumbled as he stood behind Levi, desperately trying to keep his eyes from running the length of the man's impressive physique. He could not believe he was in a negotiation to enter into a relationship with Levi Ackerman. It was too good to be true, but he did not want to wonder about the catch at this moment.

"I want you too, Eren," Levi said, not once turning around. "I may have said this to you before, but there is something about you that draws me to you." The man began washing the dishes, never once directing his attention to Eren as he spoke. Nevertheless, Eren was completely engrossed. "Your attitude, your face, your fucking gorgeous body and fuck, your eyes…those fucking eyes." Levi paused, looking at the ceiling for a moment before continuing. "I had to have you. I _have_ to have you. Of course, I'm no brute that's going to hit you over the head and drag you to my cave." For the first time, Levi glanced over Eren's shoulder smirking. Eren smiled back – it was forced, because he was too captivated by Levi's words to pay mind to anything else. Levi turned away again. "I'm willing to put some work into this. I know it won't be easy to be with a brat like you, but I believe we are somewhat compatible."

Eren did not expect that. How could Levi believe _that_? Levi knew next-to-nothing about Eren – his hobbies, things he liked, places he enjoyed spending time – and that, added to the age difference made Levi's statement sound like more of a shot in the dark, or a delusional hope, than any truth.

"How the hell can you believe that?" Eren asked, uncaring of his confrontational tone.

"Opposites attract," Levi said. "You and Kirstein have many…similarities. Look how that worked out."

Eren scowled, eyes downcast as his jaw clenched.

"I have met people with…similarities as well," Levi continued, "and it never worked, obviously. It just seems to me that when people are too alike, they are incompatible."

Eren nodded, despite Levi not being able to see the movement. "So…you're willing to give us a go?"

"I said that, didn't I?" Levi said.

"Well, I'm in if you are," Eren said.

Levi looked over his shoulder, smirking at Eren with a mischievous glint in his eyes. "As irresistible as I am, brat, I need you to think this through."

"I have!" Eren snapped. Curse this cocky asshole! Of course Levi was irresistible, _more_ than just irresistible, in fact, but in the face of such a sobering reality, Eren could not afford to think with his dick. He may have done that with Levi before, but in this moment, Little Eren was giving no input whatsoever.

"Well, let's do it then," Levi said as he pulled the plug and turned to face Eren.

The brunette balked, staring at Levi with his mouth damn near agape from shock. _Is that it_? Eren thought loudly, wondering if the words Levi had just said implied that they were entering into a relationship or if they meant they would work towards one.

"But we're going to do this the old school way," Levi said, smirking slightly. "Since I am a gentleman."

 _Wait...what?_

"Huh?" Eren could not find the words to respond. He was still wondering about the implication behind the words " _let's do it_ ".

As if he were suddenly exasperated by Eren's mere presence, Levi sighed and glared at Eren with cold, detached eyes that Eren had not seen yet today. "Just because I really want it, I am not just going to spontaneously fuck the dog shit out of you, brat." Eren blushed profusely at Levi's words. "I'd actually like us to build some sort of relationship outside of sex."

Nodding, Eren could not help the smile that tugged at his lips. That very sentence was the one thing that separated Levi and Jean, the one thought, attitude, mentality, call it what you may, that made Levi the better choice. Even if he were to go back to Jean, the fact of the matter remained: their relationship was built on sex. To change that would be to change the fundamentals of it all, and if it came down to that, would it not just be like building a new relationship from scratch?

"That's another pro," Eren said, and Levi raised a brow curiously. "You want a relationship built on...whatever they're built on, not just on sex."

"Those _never_ last, trust me."

Eren hummed in agreement. No one knew this better than he did. As soon as that thought came, it left, leaving Eren open to ponder the meaning behind Levi's earlier words once more. However, before he could confront the man, Levi spoke.

"I want to go on a date with you," Levi suddenly said.

 _A date_? Eren cried out internally, staring at Levi as if the man had grown a second head. He never pegged Levi Ackerman to be the type of man to want to go on a date, but then again...

"Something on my face, brat?" Levi growled, clearly unappreciative of Eren's obvious awe.

"Uh...n-no..." Eren quickly responded, shaking his head.

"Then what?"

"I just never thought you do dates," Eren said before he could stop himself. He bit the inside of his cheek, internally cursing himself for running his mouth.

Levi, however, immediately shifted from irked to amused. It was uncanny how quickly the man's moods could shift, frightening even. "Oh? Did I not just say I'm a gentleman?"

"Yeah but..." Eren blushed and averted his eyes. "I just didn't think you were like that, that's all."

"We have a lot to learn about each other, Eren," Levi said. "That is why I would like to have a date with you. In a private setting, of course."

"Obviously," Eren murmured. He snorted. "And here I thought you were going to wine and dine me."

The older man crossed his arms over his chest and smirked. "Is that what you want?"

Sensing Levi's playful mood, Eren swallowed his embarrassment and said, "Only if you take me home after."

Now it may have been a figment of Eren's imagination, but he could have sworn he saw unadulterated lust spike in Levi's eyes for only a split second before the man schooled his expression. When Levi spoke, however, his voice betrayed what his eyes had flashed. "What if I wine you and dine you at home?"

The playful atmosphere was gone as quickly as it had come. Levi's intense stare held Eren in place, causing the brunette to balk, biting his tongue. Oh, he wanted nothing more than to kiss Levi right now. He wanted to kiss the man and touch him, in fact he wanted to do so much more than just that and while the implication behind Levi's words was as clear as the sun in the sky, Eren knew it was not an invitation to fuck.

"I don't put out on the first date," Eren eventually whispered, desperate to break the heavy tension that hung between them.

Levi seemed pleased with Eren's answer, and the intensity of that glare immediately faltered. "Well, that would certainly give a gentleman incentive for a second date."

Happy to have the playful mood back, Eren could not help himself when he said, "And if you get to date number three, you can fuck me."

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 **Thanks for the read! Just a note, I am going on vacation in the next couple of days and will be gone for a month. I will try my best to keep posting during that time, as I foresee the new year being a very busy one! v.v**

 **Thanks for the ongoing support so far, and for sticking it out this far. Let me know what you think :)**

 **OS**


	26. Chapter 26: Blame it on the Alcohol

**A/N: Where there's a will, there's a way. I actually had this chapter half-written but it's on my PC at home, so I completely rewrote it and this is NOT the direction I anticipated it going. That love-hate relationship we have...well, the hate part is going to be explored again. I just couldn't help it...there's something about these sub-zero temperatures that I have _never_ had before in my life that made my head all well...messed up.**

 **I do hope that you enjoy, nonetheless. Thank you for the ongoing support, and I hope everyone is having a happy holiday season and staying safe.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

The music was pounding. The bass reverberated so deeply within him that it shook his very core. It hadn't taken too long before his very heartbeat had synchronized with the rhythmic vibrations encapsulating his entirety. His lungs promptly followed suit; they found the staccato shrill of the treble and jerkily expanded and contracted to its nonsensical rhythm. He breathed in air that was thick with smoke for effect and the toxic fumes of cigarette smoke…as well as smoke from other things he dare not explore. The trifecta of smokes hung low in the air, deepening the darkness that only dare be penetrated by the sharp colorful beams of dancing lights and the blinding white flashes of strobes that could send anybody into a fit of photosensitive epilepsy at any moment. That darkness, however, was what they all wanted, what they all needed – it made it easier to turn a blind eye to the regret that would surely follow a night of unbridled indulgence like this one.

Eren, for one, wanted to keep his eyes closed to that nauseating acidity of regret.

He was not supposed to be here. He was not supposed to be drinking. Tomorrow would bring with it a splitting headache, nausea and a sore body…as well as a mountain of regret he could have avoided. However, he did not care. Right now, all he wanted to do was drink and dance.

It amazed the brunette, to some degree, how a pleasant event could usher you down the same path as a devastating one. When Jean had broken his heart, Eren wanted nothing more than to drink away the pain and dance until his feet went numb. As long as he kept his mind from thinking and kept his body moving, he could forget that Jean had ever touched him despite aching for that very caress. Now, Eren found himself once again itching to move his hips and quench an insatiable thirst, but this time it was in euphoria.

As he danced – he never thought he was a spectacular dancer, probably notably average, if even that, but he enjoyed dancing – he looked around at the small group of friends that had made this night possible: Connie and Sasha were all but fucking on the dance floor, Reiner was moving his hulking mass in an unnaturally fluid way as he danced about a pretty blonde girl, and…that was all he could see. Was it because his vision was slightly blurry or because he wasn't really looking?

Did he not want to see because he wished he could be dancing with someone like that? Someone _specific_.

Eren laughed at himself at how ludicrous that thought was. He would never be able to dance with Levi the way Reiner was dancing with that girl, or the way Connie and Sasha so passionately intertwined their bodies with one another. Levi was older, quiet, and Eren was willing to be his job that the man had absolutely no interest in coming to clubs filled with drunk, sweaty barely-legal teens and rowdy young adults to dance until the sun comes up. It was just one of the many things Eren would never get to experience with the man should they pursue their intended path, but would it not be worth it – would a stable, caring, satisfying and perhaps one day, _loving_ relationship not be worth the sacrifice of going out and getting wasted?

Besides, if he _really_ wanted to have a night like that, once in a while, he had his friends to party with.

Taking a swig of his beer, Eren sneered as two warm droplets lazily crawled into his mouth. He ripped the empty bottle from his lips and growled at it as if that action could fill it right back up. Drunk, not delusional, Eren made his way to the bar for the next round. He had known three drinks ago that he would not be driving home – and that tomorrow he would regret getting drunk – so he had thrown caution to the wind and decided to go the whole nine yards.

The bar wasn't much quieter than the dance floor. Bodies were packed together like sardines in a tin can, with drunken people shoving one another to get ahead in the mass in order to secure their next hit. Eren lithely slipped between the sweating bodies, taking advantage of the entropy, and inebriation, and quickly finding himself at the bar counter. He fished out a crumpled twenty from his pocket and settled to patiently waiting for one of the bartenders to turn their attention to him.

He watched the one barman with more interest than was courteous. The slim blonde moved fluidly behind the counter, juggling drinks and cash with impressive finesse. He had a smile stuck to his face, a slight dimple in his left cheek that Eren may have imagined, and a habit of randomly puckering his lips. That little habit had Eren's mind swimming in the gutters. The barman was attractive, but what had Eren's thoughts quickly turning to perversions was the fact that he had not enjoyed the touch of another's flesh for some time. It was probably not particularly long, but he was a young, virile male in his prime...

"Eren!"

Eren tore his gaze from the cute barman and turned to the voice that had called him. He couldn't say he was particularly surprised to find Jean standing beside him; Trost was a club that was frequented by most young people in the area. With some of the most spacious dance areas, great music and DJs, cheap entrance (with bouncers willing to accept bribes for entry) and cheap alcohol, Trost was everything the kids wanted.

Besides, Eren and Jean had come here together before.

 _Pun._

"Hey," Eren said, smiling.

Just then, one of the bartenders – a busty red-head – turned her attention to Jean. He leaned closer to her and spoke, affording Eren a moment to watch those mesmerizing lips move. Jean smiled and winked at the bartender before turning to Eren.

Why was Eren feeling jealous?

"I got you a drink," Jean said. He smiled; it was a smile that could charm the pants of anyone. "I hope you don't mind."

Who was Eren to say no to free alcohol? With the spike in jealousy long-forgotten, Eren smiled at Jean and gave the man a thumbs-up. When his eyes dropped to Jean's lips for the second time in under a minute, Eren shook his head; he was definitely drunk.

 _And horny_ , he thought with a sneer. Bad combination.

Jean handed Eren a beer before turning and walking away, and Eren, without thinking, followed. He watched Jean walking, eyes raking the length of his ex-lover's body not imagining what lay beneath those clothes, but knowing. Not only knowing, but wanting.

 _Fuck_ , Eren thought, shaking his head and taking a long, meaningful sip of his beer that saw him put away half the bottle. The alcohol was definitely talking now, and if he was not careful, it would not stop with mere lustful glances. Eren surveyed the dance floor and found that his friends were nowhere in sight…well, Reiner was, but he had the pretty blonde girl that he was dancing with earlier pinned to a wall and was making out with her.

Jealousy. Eren wanted to make out, too. In fact, he wanted _much_ more.

"Wanna dance?" Jean asked.

Eren blinked his eyes back into focus and found Jean standing directly in front of him, hazel eyes expectant and focused. Something within Eren was begging to flee – could there already be a part of him that was loyal to Levi even though they had not officially declared themselves an item? – but a larger part of Eren wanted to throw caution to the wind and let himself go. He could always blame it on the alcohol.

"Sure," Eren said.

The two fell into a familiar rhythm. At first, they didn't touch one another. They danced, letting the smoke and the pounding bass fill the noticeable gap between their bodies. Their eyes barely met as they moved, each man enjoying the rhythm of the night on his own. Every now and then, one of them would take a swig of their respective drinks. As time became irrelevant and the bass pounding against their sternums became heavier than their heartbeats, that appreciable gap started to diminish. They inched closer to one another, hands tentatively falling to the others hips, later gaining confidence as they snaked around to the small of each other's backs. Eventually there was not enough space between them to even breathe, and what had been dancing moments ago had come one layer of clothing away from fucking in public.

Eren ground his hips heavily against Jean, and was not surprised that Jean reciprocated. Soon, there was nothing left to drink but his mouth was not left dry. As they danced, as Eren rubbed and swayed until he could feel his hard length brushing against Jean's, their lips met. It was fleeting, but it was enough to quench the thirst left in the beer's wake. It was enough for Eren to realize that what he was doing was not right.

But he could not stop. He had been stripped of his inhibitions.

He turned his head away, but his body could not leave. His lips refused to meet Jean's, and Jean did not chase them, content with the rest of the contact their bodies shared. Contact that was sinfully sweet, delectable, seductive, and Eren swore he would give up his spot in the competition to fuck right now.

It was so wrong, but he could not stop. He could not help himself. If regret was what he was going to feel tomorrow morning, he may as well order the dessert as well.

He let Jean lead him to the bathroom. Not a single protest was uttered as Jean relieved him of his denims, pulled his cock out from the side of his underwear and slicked it up with lube that Eren did not bother asking the origins of. His body moved on its own, responding to Jean bent over the toilet bare-bottomed with a single thrust that had him balls-deep in a familiar heat. He paid no mind to Jean, and if he closed his eyes, he could forget it was Jean entirely. All he wanted was to find relief, to get off, to ease himself of the burden of having been teased and left teetering on a precarious edge for longer than he cared to remember.

When he came, so did his sobriety.

With an angry cry, Eren shoved Jean out of the cubicle before locking the door. He could barely maneuver himself as he felt the evidence of the night rise up from deep within his belly, only just yanking the lid off the toilet before a brown acidic slush of bile, beer and a half-digested pepper-steak pie went crashing into the porcelain bowl. He could faintly hear Jean beating desperately on the cubicle door; he could make out his name being called above the disgusting splashing sounds of vomit falling into a toilet; he could even hear the laughter of other men in the bathroom and imagined that he was being ridiculed. Yet through all of that, he kept heaving, his stomach contracting so tightly he felt ready for a shirtless photo-shoot – oh, if only his abs could be _this_ defined with less flexing. Even as there was nothing left to expel, his body kept trying, leaving him dry-heaving painfully for ten minutes before it eventually stopped.

If he could, he would just lay his head down on his arm and sleep.

"Eren?" A knock on the door followed. "Yo! Eren! You in here?"

"Yeah…" Eren replied weakly.

"Open the fuckin' door or I'm bashin' it in!" That was a different voice.

"Wait," Eren said. He sighed, and with every ounce of strength left in him, he hauled himself to his feet. Without looking at the contents of the toilet, lest he be spurred into another painful fit of dry-heaving, he closed the lid and flushed.

"You alright, mate?" The first voice. Reiner.

"Yeah," Eren said.

He tucked his cock back into his underwear, cringing slightly at the sticky feel of dried lube on his skin, and redid the zipper and the button on his denims before opening the door to the cubicle. He was greeted with a very concerned Reiner, an amused Connie – who was, bless him, bearing a bottle of water – and a curious Sasha.

"What the hell you doing in the men's bathroom, Sash?" Eren asked as he reached for the water.

"I have two guys with me, one who is big enough to take out The Rock," Sasha said, patting Reiner on the shoulder, "so I can pretty much go wherever I darn well please."

Eren couldn't help but smile. He may not have known Sasha well or spent an astounding amount of time with her, but what he did know was that she was quite a carefree spirit who enjoyed living on the edge despite frequent moments of incredible cowardice.

"Wash off your face so we can get you home, tiger," Reiner said.

Eren obliged. He was in no condition to argue or even disagree with his friends. He did not even want to know what he looked like. All he knew was that the pleasant feelings of being buzzed had left him, and in its wake was nothing more than the vile taste of vomit in his mouth and the bare feeling of having his dignity stripped away from him…again. As he washed off his face, he idly wondered if his friends knew that he had just fallen into his ex's trap, _again_ , and fucked him, _again_. Although…Eren smiled a little to himself as he realized that, this time, it was he who chased Jean off once he had gotten what he wanted.

* * *

Mikasa was awake when Eren came toddling into their apartment. The only pro of having vomited his lungs out at the club was that he felt somewhat alright – not anywhere near sober, but he did not feel, look or speak like he was absolutely trashed. And with Mikasa being awake, it was a blessing.

"Eren," Mikasa said in greeting as Eren plodded into the kitchen, making a beeline for the fridge. "I made some chicken and rice. I left you a plate in the microwave."

"Thanks, Mika," Eren said as he closed the fridge. He walked up to his sister, gave her a kiss on the forehead, and then made his way to the microwave to reheat his dinner.

"Have you been drinking?" Mikasa asked.

Eren watched the numbers on the microwave countdown for a few seconds; fifty-three, fifty-two, fifty-one, fifty, forty-nine. Lying would be pointless. Not only could Mikasa tell when he was lying, but he was sure he reeked of beer. He threw Mikasa a sideways glance over his shoulder and said, "Yeah."

She sighed. He could hear the disappointment in that single, drawn-out expiration. "Why, Eren?"

He would have rolled his eyes if it would not have robbed him of his balance. _Twenty-one, twenty, nineteen, eighteen, seventeen_ …Eren turned to his sister. "Can't a guy have fun once in a while?"

"You have a competition in a couple of weeks, Eren. You need to watch what you put into your body."

There was no denying that Mikasa was right. While it was imperative that he maintained a lean and healthy diet overall, coming closer to competition time, binges like tonight would not only weigh on his body, but also detriment his training for a couple of days…a couple of days that he could not afford to go at anything less than one hundred percent. Of course, he was not going to admit this to Mikasa.

"It's just a competition," Eren said, turning back to the microwave just in time to watch the tail end of the final countdown. "There will be more."

"You won't be saying that when Jean beats you."

The microwave beeped then. Three shrill beeps echoed through the apartment, adding finality to Mikasa's words and holding Eren in place. She was right. Instead of admit this, Eren ignored her; he grabbed his plate from the microwave and pushed past Mikasa to go and sit in the living room. There, he wolfed down his meal, wondering if it, in conjunction with the rapid expulsion of alcohol earlier, would aid in a faster recovery. Maybe he would only suffer half a day instead of a full day.

"Eren," Mikasa called quietly. Eren did not answer. "Look…I don't mean to nag you. You can have fun and stuff just…I know how much this means to you. I know that you want to beat Jean as a novice. You're only going to get one chance to do that."

Eren stopped eating then. He suddenly remembered what he had done moments before turning around to puke – he had fucked Jean. It was short-lived, dirty and raw, and right now Eren felt utterly disgusting for having stooped that low.

"I don't feel so well…" Eren said, shakily grabbing as his plate.

Mikasa was quick to respond; she dived down and grabbed Eren's plate just as he jumped to his feet, and watched as he bolted towards the bathroom. What Eren did not see, as she took the half-eaten plate of food back to the kitchen, was that her exasperation was marred by concern.

Once again, Eren had emptied the contents of his stomach, but it was not because of over-indulgence; it was pure disgust. He was mortified, to say the least, that he had done what he had done. Of course he would blame it on the alcohol, but in that same breath he wished he had drunk more so that he wouldn't have had to remember the event at all. Unfortunately, that was not how life worked. Eren had made a mistake, and his mind was going to make sure that he remembered every excruciating detail of it – from the coldness of the lube against his cock, to the warmth of Jean, to his tightness, to the mind-numbing pleasure of getting release.

Sighing, Eren scrubbed harder. He had been scrubbing at his skin for minutes already, and it showed in the deep red tint on his body. But even the abrasive scrubbing and the scalding water that could damn near melt the skin clean off his body – oh, how he wished it could – still could not cleanse him of his sin. Out of habit, he lifted a hand to punch at the wall, but stopped as a scab caught his attention in his peripherals. He glanced at his balled up fist and took in what he saw – scabs, evidence of the last tantrum he had thrown and thanks to who? None other than Jean Kirstein. Eren clenched his jaw; Jean Kirstein was going to be the reason why he would break his damn hands.

With a click of his tongue, Eren lowered his hand, straightened himself out and shut off the water. He closed his eyes for a moment, taking several deep breaths in an effort to calm himself down, and it worked. Within a minute, he was feeling better – calmer, more rational and more in control.

When he opened his eyes, his gaze immediately dropped to his hands. For how he had beaten the concrete pillar, he was surprisingly unhurt. Yes, he had bled, and those wounds had scabbed, but they weren't sore or tender in the least. The scabs were mostly healed. Some would say Eren healed quickly, but Eren knew the truth – he was just so used to it that he barely felt it anymore. Sometimes he felt blessed to be like that; it was often said that the success of a fighter was not determined by how hard he could hit, but by how hard he could get hit and stand back up. By that logic, Eren would make a fucking fantastic fighter, he reckoned.

After dressing for bed, Eren wandered back to the living room, where Mikasa was watching TV in the dark with the volume turned down low. Neither of them spoke as Eren curled up beside Mikasa, allowing her to drape an arm over him and nuzzling against her as he made himself comfortable. He let himself forget about what he'd done, forget about the regret, the disgust...he cleared his mind of everything and simply closed his eyes, treasuring this moment with his sister. And so, with an old episode of NCIS lighting up the living room, Eren fell asleep on his sister's shoulder for the first time in years.

* * *

 **I know, I am terrible. Please do not hate me! But that, kids, is why we do not drink (or hang out with bad exes, for that matter).**

 **Stay safe for new years, don't drink and drive, be responsible and don't do drugs ;) May the transition into 201 be epic!**

 **OS**


	27. Chapter 27: So It Begins

**A/N: Hi all, I am back. Thank you for the ongoing support...things have been a little hectic and I haven't had much inspiration. I considered abandoning this story but I could not do that with the amazing following I have. So once again, thank you. I read through all the reviews today and you guys and gals are really too good for me.**

 **I apologize in advance as this chapter is unedited. I didn't want to leave it for a day I have time or energy to edit because then it would be another delay of godknows how long. So here it is. I hope you enjoy it.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

Something was wrong with Eren. While Levi was, contrary to popular belief, sensitive to others' demeanors, it did not take any thought or prying to notice that Eren was unwell. Not only was his performance up to shit – his offensive form was sloppy and hinging more on instinct than learnt skill, and his defense was practically nonexistent – but he was quite obviously distracted. Whenever Levi barked out a sequence, it took Eren seconds to comply. When Levi reprimanded Eren, he was all but unresponsive. It was as if his mind was a thousand miles away and his eyes were attempting to follow suit; those unseeing emerald orbs were all over the dojo, only flickering back to the bag to orientate himself whenever he lost his balance.

The man before Levi was not an athlete dying to make a success of his fist competition, rather a boy with barely a hope of even being a wannabe.

Levi would have liked to start sparring with Eren today, but if Eren were pitted against him now, he would destroy Eren without even trying.

"For fuck's sake, Yeager, focus!" Levi growled as he delivered a powerful blow to the bag dangling before Eren.

Eren jolted as Levi's shin connected with the bag with a loud thud. Those unfocused eyes snapped back to the bag, watching it swing back and forth before lifting his eyes to meet Levi's. They looked dead; it looked like Eren wanted to be anywhere but here. Seeing someone as lively as Eren with no life in his eyes was, admittedly, unnerving.

"Where the hell is your mind today, Yeager?" Levi snapped, masking his concern with agitation.

At Eren's lack of response, Levi looked around the dojo, wondering if Kirstein were up to something that could be stealing Eren's attention. It was then that he noticed, for the first time, that Kirstein was in fact absent. Was that the reason for Eren's eyes being everywhere but on the bag? Was Eren searching for Kirstein, wondering where he may be?

An itch boiled up in Levi's gut at the thought. What of the conversation he and Eren had had only two days prior? Had Eren not assured him that he would not be competing against that disrespectful bastard? Was this all a ruse? Some sick, conniving way to get Levi to confess his desires so that Eren could one day turn around, laugh and spit to the world, " _I told you Levi is gay!_ "?

Levi's hands balled into fists as that traitorous thought spawned a dozen more, each more infuriating than the other, and each like a whip driving his irritation on, forcing it to evolve into anger and ultimately pure loathing. What made it worse was the fact that Eren still had the audacity to remain silent despite having been spoken to.

"Are you a fucking mute, Yeager?"

"Sorry," Eren mumbled, lifting his eyes but not far enough to meet Levi's.

The pain and humility in that single word was enough to disarm Levi. In that moment, as he looked at Eren, not saw or noticed, but _really looked_ at the exhausted brunette, Levi realized that something was terribly wrong. Not only was Eren distracted and looked like he was moments away from selling his own mother just to buy his way out of training today, but there was a pain in Eren's eyes that Levi had not previously noticed – or was simply too preoccupied by Eren's by Eren's lack of interest in the session to have noticed there was more to it than meets the eye. Levi had been so blinded by his irritation, fueled by his new and growing obsession to train Eren to beat Kirstein, that he had entirely disregarded Eren's behavior.

"Oi, let's take a break," Levi said quietly.

Eren clearly did not expect this. He looked at Levi as if the man had grown another head, which irked Levi; was him being merciful really that far-fetched?

Without dwelling on the pang that that thought roused in his chest, Levi handed Eren a towel. The brunette took it with a sheepish thank-you and quickly wiped his face off before letting out a long breath. He stood and stared at the ceiling with his hands on his hips as if he were contemplating one of life's greatest mysteries, desperately trying to steady his shaky breathing in what Levi assumed was an attempt to bring his heart rate down.

Levi quietly began to gather his things. He packed up his equipment, neatly rolling up his skipping-ropes and packing his gloves into his kitbag. He folded his towel with the precision one would expect of a five-star hotel before packing it into his bag and zipping it shut. Once he had gathered his belongings, he risked another glance at Eren, expecting the youngster to still be gathering himself. What he was met with was Eren staring at him with something akin to wonder etched in his boyish features.

"Something on my face, brat?" Levi asked.

Eren smiled shyly as he shook his head and averted his eyes. Levi wondered if the red tint on Eren's cheeks was him being flushed from the training or a blush. "No," Eren said.

"Rhetorical question," Levi mumbled, averting his own eyes as a strange feeling, one that was becoming familiar, welled up inside of his chest. For what had to be the seventh-dozen time, Levi wondered what it was about Eren Yeager that had him feeling like a fourteen-year old schoolgirl with her first crush. "I probably should stop asking this, but do you want to come home with me?"

The smile that touched Eren's lips was a devious one that Levi had not thought the boy capable of producing in his state. "That's the first time you've asked in those words," Eren said.

"Whatever."

Eren chuckled. "Sure, I'll come."

* * *

The routine had become somewhat familiar by now. They arrived at Levi's house, parted ways to shower, and then met back up. Although, what happened at that meeting up had varied drastically from Eren being kicked out of the apartment to Eren kissing Levi, possibly against the man's will. This time, however, it was easy, almost natural. Levi was done before Eren and had gotten busy fixing up a light dinner – fish and salad – and that was where Eren found him. This was, however, the first time there was music playing.

As Eren silently watched Levi make the salad, lips moving as he mouthed the words to a haunting song sung by what sounded like a heartbroken woman, he found himself feeling something he hadn't felt in a very long time. It bubbled up in his chest, pumping through his veins and it made him feel restless. Despite this, he remained still, opting to chew on his lip rather than fidget and squirm around.

"Are you just going to stand there or are you going to help me make your dinner?" Levi asked without looking at Eren.

Eren couldn't be surprised that Levi had noticed his presence. The man had the situational awareness of a marine.

"Nah, you look plenty capable." Eren said, teasingly.

At that, Levi glanced over his shoulder, but the grin touching his lips made Eren's heart stutter. That grin, and the slight quirk of one delicate yet defined eyebrow was enough to bring the world to a halt on its axis. Eren stared, clenching his jaw as their eyes met. He wondered if it was a figment of his imagination or if Levi really did go slightly slack-jawed in that moment.

"Don't be entirely useless," Levi said, turning his attention back to the salad. "Get us something to drink, will you?"

"What do you have?" Eren asked without missing a beat.

He made his way to the fridge and opened it up before Levi could answer. He was met with a fridge unlike any other he'd ever seen – one rack entirely dedicated to bottled water, another rack with four small boxes of orange juice, and a third rack with a box of three-dozen eggs. The fruit and vegetable drawer was empty, and the door was stocked with condiments; Levi liked chili and peri-peri, Eren noted. Upon second inspection, Eren also noticed that all four boxes of juice were the same – orange juice. The fridge was impeccably neat.

"Orange juice and water," Levi answered.

Eren rolled his eyes and reached for a box of orange juice. "No shit, Sherlock." He poured a glass of juice for himself and for Levi before saying, "This music is nice. Who is it?"

"No idea," Levi said. "It's a random YouTube playlist."

"I don't really know that much about you, you know," Eren said after a moment of silence.

"I thought you were my biggest fan?" Levi said, turning slightly but not enough to make eye contact.

Eren snorted. "Yeah but that stuff is jazzed up, you know that."

How many times had Eren wished he could meet Levi, not for a fuck – although he would never say no to that – but to just talk. All he wanted was to get to know Levi as the man behind the mask of the beast, the human being behind the sex icon in Men's Health. He wanted to be able to ask questions, and that was one of the things that drove him to Titan Dojo in the first place. It was only after he'd joined that he realized what a recluse Levi was, and that the one thing the tabloids did not exaggerate was his viciously anti-social behavior.

"I want to know you for _you_. Hell…we're going to get into some pretty intense stuff so I guess I just…" Eren trailed off.

"You don't need to explain, Eren," Levi said. He turned around then, completely neglecting the half-chopped cucumber in favor of talking to Eren. "I am guilty of the same thing. We were both so taken with the idea of the other that we stopped thinking with the right head."

Eren chuckled, but at the back of his mind he felt a zesty excitement at the prospect of Levi wanting him. He had seen firsthand just how deep Levi's desire for him was; his mind wandered to the feeling of Levi's hard cock against his skin, the heaviness of the organ and the heat that seemed to be emanating from it. He remembered his hunger as he ached to taste it, and just how close he'd come to doing so.

"So if you have any questions, feel free to ask," Levi said, interrupting Eren's train of thought, much to the brunette's relief.

"Is this the type of music you usually listen to?" Eren asked without a moment's hesitation.

"Mostly," Levi answered. Eren nodded eagerly, prompting Levi to continue. "I like listening to Nordic and Viking playlists…whatever modern people consider to be Viking or Nordic music, anyway."

"Can I hear more, please?"

Levi turned to Eren and eyed him quizzically. Eren wondered if Levi thought Eren would not be interested in his kind of music, because for a moment, the man looked uncertain about how to react. Then, when thought returned to him, Levi grabbed his phone and searched for his favorite playlist and played it through the 10.2 surround-sound system so the depth of the music could be fully appreciated.

The second the music began to reverberate through the system, it seemed to shake the very core of Eren's being. It was unlike anything he'd ever heard…the deep bass of the drums was so unlike the bass of dance music or even house music. It was natural, authentic, and the harmonizing of instruments made it feel as though the air were arctic and a fire flickering was the only warmth. Eren hadn't noticed he'd gravitated towards Levi until his shoulder brushed against the man's chest.

That did not tear him from the trance, though.

Instead, Eren turned towards Levi and looked at the man. Their eyes met, and even though they were lost to the moment, they were not lost to lust. Still, there was something overcoming both of them, something that had them forget the world outside of this moment even existed. Dinner be damned.

Eren subtly leaned forward. The words he'd said before flitted through his mind, but in this moment it felt inappropriate to say. If his actions weren't a clear indication of his intentions, then nothing else would be. In this moment, there was nothing Eren wanted more than to feel Levi's lips on his, and he was not going to announce it this time.

Throwing caution to the wind, Eren let the music guide him. He dipped his head, keeping his eyes fixed on Levi's as his lips inched ever closer to the older man's. There was no resistance from Levi, yet no advance either; Eren took it with a pinch of salt, deducing that if Levi really did not want this, he would back away. Eren's heart beat at a tempo double that of the drums, and that pace seemed to be ever-increasing as the distance between his lips and the man he desired closed.

When their lips met, it was not atomic. It was not a mind-blowing explosion lover's describe when they finally taste of the one they desire. It was not electric, or entrancing or even arousing. When their lips met, it was just perfect. Eren pressed his lips to Levi's tentatively, feeling the man's lips pucker slightly against his own. With a small pucker of his own, Eren pressed forward, putting more pressure on Levi's lips as the music reached an orgasmic crescendo. It felt just right.

Eren turned his body to Levi's and snaked his arms around the man's lithe, muscular frame. Levi was quick to reciprocate, his own hands finding their place on Eren's hips. At this, Eren released a long breath, shifting as his lips began to move slowly against Levi's. The two quickly fell into a gentle rhythm, and as they synchronized their slow dance, a feeling of serenity settled over Eren.

He never imagined kissing someone could feel so right.

It was Levi who dared to deepen the kiss; in a moment where Eren's lips left his, Levi pushed forward and gently, yet firmly, allowed his tongue to snake forward. The warm, wet organ brushed against Eren's, causing the boy to jolt slightly at the unexpected touch. Eren smiled a little as his tongue met Levi's, and moments later his body was flush with the shorter man's.

Once again, Levi dared to push forward. One hand left Eren's hip and ran through the brunette's wet, tousled hair, feeling the thick strands fill the gaps between his fingers until he managed to fill his palm with a good fistful. He then fisted his hand around his find and tilted Eren's head back ever so slightly, once again moving forward to deepen the kiss. Eren's back his a wall, and brunette realized that he hadn't even noticed they were near one. Yet, here he was, trapped between Levi's warm body and the cool wall, and that was when his body began to wake.

Eren could feel himself harden, but he forced his attention to remain on Levi's lips. As much as he wanted more, as much as he wanted to touch Levi, to fuck him, Eren held still. At Levi's mercy, Eren remained pinned to the wall as both men allowed their inhibitions to fall to nothing.

Without warning, Levi's lips stopped moving. Eren leaned forward for more, but the man turned away and gave Eren a chaste kiss on the cheek. With that, Levi backed away just far enough for Eren to get a good look at the man – Levi was flushed. His skin wasn't red and he wasn't panting, but there was an exhaustion fogging his eyes that Eren instantly recognized as one of lust. It was only then that Eren realized that Levi too was hard, and that that hardness was pressing against his thigh. That alone was enough to cause a jolt in Eren's cock, but he said nothing. He let his eyes do the talking, let the music set the mood, as he silently asked Levi for direction.

"What do you want, Eren?" Levi asked, his voice deeper than the bass vibrating through the very foundation of the building.

"You," Eren mouthed, his voice lost beneath the sounds filling the room.

Levi's eyes remained fixed on Eren's as a moment of clarity overcame them, and for a moment Eren feared that he'd been too bold. That fear was quickly arrested as Levi's hand pressed against Eren's cock, palming at it firmly, causing the brunette to stiffen as a wave of pleasure violently tore through his frame. He wanted more, no, he needed more, and his body betrayed him as his hips stuttered forward just an inch to seek more of that teasing touch.

"Are you sure?" Levi asked.

Only then did Eren recognize the clarity in Levi's eyes as determination.

"Yes," Eren answered.

Levi's nod was barely perceptible, but Eren's focus was solely on the man and so he saw the decision being made right before his eyes. Levi's hands found the hem of Eren's shirt and grabbed it, gently pulling at the fabric as he relieved Eren of the garment. With his back against the wall, a shiver ran the length of Eren's spine and he felt his nipples harden as the sensation of Levi's hands on his body and the cool plaster created a confusing yet oddly arousing sensation within him. His hands reached out, seeking Levi, but the man was quick to shush him quietly.

"Just enjoy, Eren," Levi said. He nipped seductively at Eren's ear. "Tonight is all about you."

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 **I will have the next chapter up this weekend, that is my promise ^.^**

 **OS**


	28. Chapter 28: All About Eren

**A/N: Promised another one by the weekend, and here it is. Thanks for the support and well-wishes. Le Inspiration is returning, slowly but surely. Enjoy.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

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The taste of Eren's skin was sinfully sweet. Even though the boy had used Levi's body wash, the way it mixed with his scent gave that tanned skin a scent that Levi could drink in forever and a taste that the man could not get enough of. His lips trailed across Eren's skin, tracing the lines of the younger man's collar bone as his hands stayed in place on Eren's hips. Oh, he wanted to touch, to grab and to _take_ everything that was laid bare before him, but Levi knew better than to let his own excitement get the better of him. He wanted this to be about Eren, to ensure that Eren was comfortable and pleasured. His own pleasure could wait. He would arrest his greed.

Just feeling the boy writhe under his touch – the rapid rise and fall of Eren's broad chest and the light tremble in his legs – was enough to drive Levi crazy. He could feel his arousal straining against his pants, pressing against Eren's trembling leg, and as much as he wanted more than just that simple touch, he loved it. He loved knowing that Eren was aware of it, that it was within reach, yet Eren stayed motionless, pinned to the wall with his hands balled into fists at his side. Eren may not know it, but he was giving all the control to Levi, and Levi loved it.

Trailing his lips down, Levi hesitated for a second at Eren's nipples. He wondered if he should attend to the little pert buds, but quickly decided against it – this would not be the last time he would be attending to Eren's body, and right now all he wanted was to give the boy pleasure. And judging by Eren's subtle thrusts against him, nipples was the last thing Eren wanted Levi's lips to attend to.

The man smiled as his continued his journey down Eren's torso. He found it amusing how two-dimensional men could be when aroused…that was what made them so fun to play with, he thought. It made training a man a challenge. Women were easy in that they enjoyed having their whole bodies attended to and pleasure coming at them from all avenues. Men, on the other hand, chased the high that came with pleasure, and like most highs, it was best found expeditiously. Of course, not all men were like that – Levi knew this as he was far from that brand of pleasure-seeker – but it was difficult to find a man that appreciated full-body pleasure as much as he did.

Nevertheless, he would get to that later. He had teased Eren enough, denied him enough.

"Levi?" Eren whispered breathlessly, as Levi lowered himself to his knees before Eren.

Looking up at the brunette, Levi was unable to control the snaking of his tongue across his lips. Eren looked delectable – lost to lust, Eren's eyes seemed to have darkened to a dark shade of brown as he looked down at Levi kneeling before him. In those dark eyes was expectation; there would only be one reason a person would kneel this way before a man. Yet despite that expectation and the lust running rampant in those darkened emerald hues, Eren stayed still. He looked down at Levi, waiting, wanting, questioning and hoping.

It was sultry, at best, and Levi had to reign himself in lest he find himself palming at his own hardened length.

Instead of answer the other man, Levi slipped his fingers in the hem of the tracksuit pants he had lent him. He found it ironic that the first time he had the pleasure of disrobing Eren, it was his own clothes that he was removing. Ironic, yet strangely pleasing.

Eren, who had been still the entire time, froze under Levi's touch. His breathing hitched and his eyes widened some, and for a moment, Levi thought he had been too forward.

"Is this okay, Eren?" Levi asked, already knowing the answer. He knew Eren wanted him, and in this moment it was painfully obvious – with the impressive erection but a breath away from Levi's cheek – that Eren wanted him, but Levi could never be too sure. Although, as he asked, he knew that for an aroused man to say no at this point, to something he had always wanted, would take a herculean effort.

Eren hummed, his voice an octave higher than normal, and he nodded his head with comical vigor. Levi chuckled quietly before nipping playfully at Eren's concealed length. The brunette gasped at the touch, and the faintest of moans fell from his lips. It was sinful.

Having left the youngster on edge for long enough, Levi swiftly relieved Eren of the tracksuit pants, freeing the impressive cock he had a glimpse of just the other day. Up close, it was even more delectable, and just seeing it in all its glory right before him was enough to have Levi bite his own lips. It was big, impressively so, but not huge. The proportion of girth to length was textbook, and the glans was bulbous and swollen, hungry and eager to be touched. It was large, but once again, not extremely so. It was a fine and distinct difference in size from the shaft. The shaft – oh, Levi loved a cut cock more than anything – was gorgeous. The engorged veins he had seen days earlier were vivid now up close, and they wrapped around Eren's cock like a network of rivers across the land. And the line, the proud show that Eren was cut, gave a tantalizing color change to the man's shaft, deepening the pink at the tip that bled into the deep red of Eren's aching head.

Levi wanted to moan as he took in the sheer beauty of the beast before him.

Instead of engulf it – and Levi was sorely tempted to do just that – he very lightly pressed his lips to the base of Eren's cock. He was pleased by the fact that Eren was clean-shaven, and only the first budding strands of regrowth dared prickle Levi's lips. Here, at the heart of Eren's manhood, Levi closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Clean, freshly washed, the scent that overcame the man was pleasant and fragrant, but mixed in with the lingering soapy smell was the heavy musk of a man aroused. It was subtle at first, masked by Dove Men Care, but as Levi deepened that breath the unmistakable scent of Eren in all his masculine glory overcame him.

"Fuck," Levi whispered, his expletive so soft that Eren would never have been able to hear him.

His lips lightly trailed along the length of Eren's shaft to the tip, feeling the rise and fall of skin as veins protruded. Levi listened intently to Eren's breathing as he made his way to the sweet spot, noting that it had gone from being fast and deep to staccato and shallow, with Eren holding his breath every few seconds. Levi smiled against Eren's cock, pleased that he could excite the man to this degree with such light touches.

"Levi…" Eren whimpered as Levi's lips grazed Eren's head, and for the first time, he reached out to touch Levi. One hand found itself entangled in Levi's hair, but only stayed there a second before Eren jerked it away, as if he realized he was overstepping the line.

Perhaps he wouldn't have to do too much training after all, Levi mused.

"Hmm?" Levi asked, letting his breath wash over Eren's head.

The boy stiffened with his hips pushed slightly forward, but said nothing.

"What is it, Eren?" Levi asked. His tongue lightly, barely perceptibly, ran along the underside of Eren's head right to the very tip of his cock. Eren's cock jolted at the touch.

"Levi!" Eren whimpered again, his voice louder and more desperate. "Please…"

"Please what?" Levi asked, flicking his tongue against Eren's cock again. It jolted again.

"Just…" Eren said, but whatever would have come from his mouth next was swallowed.

"Just what, Eren?" Levi licked at Eren's cock again, this time applying slightly more pressure but limiting the contact to the very tip of his tongue. "Tell me what you want me to do, Eren."

"Suck it!" Eren growled, throwing caution to the wind.

Oh, Levi liked that – the guttural growl of Eren falling over the edge, the confident demand spoken by a trembling voice, and the impatient wording was enough to have Levi willingly oblige.

Careful, as to not betray his own hunger, Levi took Eren's head into his mouth. He tentatively wrapped his lips around it, wetting it as it nestled against his tongue. Eren let out a long breath at the touch, and his posture relaxed some…until Levi's tongue swirled around the head in a long, deliberate motion.

"Fuuuuuck…" Eren hissed.

Levi wondered if this boy had ever gotten a blowjob before. He had hardly begun and the cock in his mouth was pulsating as if Eren were moments away from cumming.

Levi pressed forward then, keeping his lips pursed with a light, pleasant pressure on Eren's cock, and he slid his lips down along Eren's shaft. He wondered idly if he would be able to take it all in, but had come down two thirds of the length when he felt the familiar discomfort of a pending gag. He stopped there, taking a deep breath, debating on whether to push forward or not – it had been a while since he'd had a cock in his mouth. As he deliberated, an uncertain hand fisted in his hair and tugged, pulling him back. He found this curious, and obliged, and as his lips slid closer to Eren's swollen head, the brunette hummed in approval.

Levi noted that Eren liked attention to his head.

Giving the brunette what he wanted, Levi sucked long and deliberately at Eren's head, tasting Eren's precum for the first time. It was sweet, and Levi's tongue hungrily lapped at the tiny bead emanating from the slit as if it were the most delicious thing in the world. The newfound vigor had Eren cussing up above, that fisted hand tightening in Levi's hair and the beautiful cock Levi could worship all day jolting with excitement in his mouth. Levi was definitely doing something right.

Levi could feel his own cock jolt in its constraints, but he was unperturbed. This moment was about Eren, and he was going to give Eren his undivided attention until Eren was thoroughly satisfied, and then he would worry about himself. Giving Eren this pleasure was more of a privilege and a turn-on that Levi could begin to describe, and he wouldn't want to detract from it in any way.

That hand that wished to slide down his own pants found its way to Eren's cock, and Levi wrapped his fingers around the wet shaft. With his tongue still dancing on Eren's head, Levi have the shaft a tentative pump, sliding his hand along the length slowly, to the base, and then back up until his forefinger and thumb pressed against his lips. That extra stimulation had Eren moaning out loud, a little hum of "uh-huh" quietly falling from his lips as his hand relaxed and let go of Levi's hair.

More precum spilled into Levi's mouth, and for the first time, the man moaned. It was quiet, and Levi idly wondered if Eren could hear it above his own breathing and sounds, but it was a thorough appreciation of the sweet nectar Eren was sharing.

Pulling back, Levi almost let the tip fall from his mouth before engulfing it again, only this time his hand glided down the length of the impressive cock in tandem to his lips engulfing the head. His tongue swiftly circled it once, before he pulled back, his hand following suit. It started slowly, Levi using his hand and mouth to stimulate every glorious inch of Eren's beautiful cock and his tongue to maximize that sweet pleasure and lap up the nectar that spilled every now and then. Slowly, until Levi found a rhythm, and when he did, Eren's breathing became shallower, and the quiet whimpers of "yes" and "fuck" and "Levi" and the desperate begging of "don't stop" were enough to have Levi increase the pace.

And when Levi did, that quiet little "fuck" became a loud, long-winded expletive as Eren, yet again, began to tremble.

"Holy fuck!" Eren choked out, "This is so…fucking…good…"

It wouldn't be long. Eren's head had swollen impossibly more, and the precum was now all but cascading into Levi's mouth at a steady pace. Risking a glance up at Eren, Levi saw that the man's head was thrown back, eyes screwed tightly shut and mouth slightly agape as Eren found himself absolutely lost in pleasure. Yes, it would definitely not be long before Eren…

"Levi, I'm gonna cum!" Eren suddenly announced, gripping painfully tightly at Levi's hair, now with both hands, as his hips rocked back and forth.

Trapped by the brunette – who had suddenly become inhumanly strong – Levi had no choice but to accept what Eren had to give. Of course, if he really wanted to, he could have escaped the younger man's vice-grip, but he wanted to taste Eren's essence. He stayed still as Eren thrust into his mouth, only three times before the brunette's cock jolted, and shot.

Once, twice, three…Levi counted six _massive_ spurts of thick cum shooting into his mouth with an appreciable jolt of the man's cock at every squirt. Levi had to swallow quickly, not daring to breathe as Eren emptied himself. Although, it did not stop at those six…even after that, tiny spurts and eventually a little dribble came from the man, and Levi found himself staring at Eren's hairless pubic mound, eyes wide with horror, wondering when it would end, as the brunette just did not stop cumming.

"Fuck…" Eren eventually breathed, hands releasing their grip on Levi's hair. He let out a deep breath. "Holy shit. Fuck, that was good. Wow."

For the first time since this had begun, their eyes met. Levi, still kneeling before Eren, having swallowed more cum in one go than he swore he had ever done in his life, looked up at Eren with either horror, disbelief or both etched on his face. And as he stared, he noted that Eren's cum did not taste too bad. For cum.

"Levi?" Eren asked, frowning a little.

"Could you not have warned me that you cum like a fucking fire-hose?" Levi eventually said.

A blush immediately tinted Eren's already flushed cheeks, and suddenly those green orbs were unable to stay focused on the greys. "I didn't know you were going to swallow…"

"I didn't have much of a choice, you pushy brat."

Eren's blush deepened and he turned away from Levi, not noticing the man smirking and rising to stand before him.

"Hey," Levi said. Eren turned to face Levi, jolting slightly as he noticed the man's lips but a breath away from his own. "I'm kidding." Levi kissed Eren softly.

A smile touched Eren's lips as they pressed against Levi's, but as quickly as it had started, it was over. Levi pulled away and glared at Eren with his brows furrowed.

"What's that smell?" Levi asked.

"Huh?" Eren looked over Levi's shoulders, to the kitchen, and noticed that the pan on the stove had smoke coming from it. "Were you busy cooking something?"

"Fuck me! My fish!" Levi cried out, before turning and dashing towards the kitchen.

That sheer horror – eyes wide, mouth agape and completely frantic – was the most expression Eren had ever seen on Levi.

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 **That poor fish...**

 **Hope you enjoyed. :)**

 **OS**


	29. Chapter 29: Filthy Brat

**A/N: So...this chapter was ready five days ago. I tried to upload it and there was an error, so I left it on my flash, figuring I'd upload it first thing in the morning. Morning came...flash RANDOMLY corrupted. I had to format it, so I lost the entire fic, including this chapter that I thought was perfect. I mourned it for three days, thinking I could never rewrite it to its level of perfection. I eventually just sat down, had a drink and got my shit together and birthed this chapter. I actually like it A LOT more than the original...lots of changes! Everything happens for a reason, they say. Forgive the long note, I had to share my life story.**

 **Anyway. ENJOY!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

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Watching Levi frantically flitting about the kitchen as he retrieved the charred remains of the fish from the barely-recognizable frying pan was a sight to behold. Cussing as he meandered about the kitchen, Levi embodied a fluidity that Eren never thought possible to encompass in a state such as this. Between the stove, the sink and the trashcan, Levi traversed the kitchen with grace despite spitting expletives that would put old sailors to shame. Seeing Levi like this had Eren simply staring in awe – Levi had become more human to Eren in the last ten minutes than he had ever been, but in this moment, that humanity peaked. Here, right before Eren's eyes, in the smoky kitchen, Levi was going through what a normal person would.

Eren always imagined celebrities to be their own breed of human; with ridiculously expensive cars, unnecessarily large mansions and servants to wait upon their every need, Eren imagined those with fortune to be above menial tasks such as cooking or cleaning up after themselves. He remembered the first time he had seen Levi's apartment – it came as a shock to the young fan to see Levi living in such a simple, "small" home. While definitely high-end, it was something a rich young bachelor or a modern dinky family could afford. A simple apartment was the last thing Eren expected of the multi-millionaire sportsman. Since then, Levi hadn't failed to surprise Eren, yet even now, after having had received a blowjob from the man, Eren was still entranced by him.

Eren smiled. Levi gave him a blowjob. And swallowed.

"What the fuck are you smiling for?" Levi growled.

Emerald eyes snapped back into focus only to find a less-than-impressed Levi Ackerman glaring at him with a burnt pan in one hand and a melted plastic spatula in the other. For a moment, Eren was taken aback by Levi's bare chest – had Levi been shirtless this entire time?

When Eren offered no answer – Levi's dismissive attitude and steely glare gave Eren the impression he did not _want_ a reply – Levi simply clicked his tongue and continued about in the kitchen. Try as he may, Eren could not take his eyes off the perfection before him. Edited pictures were one thing (great jerk-off material, for one) but seeing Levi this _human_ was a different kind of turn-on. Yes, his body was chiseled and his muscles seemingly sculpted by the gods, but Levi, right now, did not look like the lean machine that plastered Eren's bedroom walls – Eren made a mental note that he would have to remove all those posters just in case Levi did ever visit. Levi was not the feared champion with eyes that held nothing but a lust for violence. Levi was not the sex-icon Eren fantasized about. Right now, Levi was just a man, and the longer Eren looked at that man, the more Eren found himself wanting Levi in ways that deeply transcended anything he could have ever imagined.

Eren had only ever been in love once. When he had fallen in love with Jean, the fall was hard and fast…like many other things in their relationship. It was everything a first love was supposed to be – passionate, fulfilling, warming – but it became everything no relationship should ever be – hurtful, toxic and demeaning. Eren would be lying if he said he didn't want those positive feelings again; Eren _did_ want to love and be loved again.

Could Levi ever give him that?

Looking at the man now, like _this_ , there was nothing in the universe that could say it was impossible. Their lifestyles and statuses be damned, right now they were two men with a world of possibilities before them.

 _Oh my god…_ Eren lifted his hand to his mouth and nibbled lightly at the flesh at his thumb as he pondered the possibility – and the likelihood – of falling in love with Levi.

"So much for fish," Levi suddenly said before the loud clanging of the pan in the trashcan snapped Eren out of his reverie. "Eren…are you okay?"

Caught red-handed in what was undoubtedly the beginning of a mild panic, Eren could do nothing but plaster his best smile on his face, tuck his hands in his pockets and say, "I was really looking forward to the fish."

Of course Levi wouldn't believe him. The man had the uncanny ability to see right through Eren…to see right through people in general. That was one of the things that made Levi such a talented fighter; his ability to read people was second to none.

"It was only hake," Levi said, before leaving the kitchen.

Levi may be observant, but he also knew exactly when to let things go.

"So, what does my little fire-truck want to eat now?" Levi called from the bedroom.

Eren balked, wondering if he'd heard correctly. "Little fire-truck?"

When Levi returned, with his phone in his hand, he raised a brow at Eren and said, "My apologies. _Big_ fire-truck."

"What the hell are you calling me a fire-truck for?" Eren cried out. Deep down inside, he couldn't help but feel chuffed at the "big" compliment.

Instead of answer, Levi closed the gap between them and grabbed at Eren's now-flaccid cock hidden behind tracksuit pants. While the movement seemed rough and entirely unpremeditated, when the man's palm came into contact with Eren's sensitive flesh, the touch was surprisingly light. Despite this, Eren still jolted with a yelp.

"You fucking cum like a fire-hose," Levi said flatly. "Even if the stove did catch fire, I'm sure you could have handled it." He smirked then. "With the right priming."

"Jesus, Levi," Eren said, his face heating up in record time as he averted his eyes.

Levi snickered. Not laughed, not chuckled, but snickered, as he gently cupped Eren's cheek and guided the younger man's lips to his own. As they met, despite the chaste nature of the kiss, what felt like a flurry of a thousand butterflies broke free inside Eren's gut. Suddenly, he couldn't stand still. Being only inches away from Levi was too far. Levi's lips against his was not enough. Suddenly, in that moment that they kissed, Eren thought that falling in love with Levi might actually be _nice_.

"How does a pizza from Smith's sound?" Levi asked.

"Hmm."

Levi nipped Eren's lip lightly. "Shitty brat. Answer me."

Instead of reply, Eren simply nodded. He did not want to speak. He wanted this moment to last forever. He was afraid that if he spoke, that if cognition returned to him that he would be frightened off by the premise of loving someone who would likely never love him back.

"Eren." Levi's voice had taken a stern tone that commanded Eren's attention. "I'm fucking starving."

"Pizza," Eren said, ducking for another kiss only to be rejected. He pouted. "What?"

"Any particular pizza?"

Eren wanted to roll his eyes. Pizza was not quite at the forefront of his mind, much less so the toppings. "Anything. I just don't like olives or fruit."

"That's not anything," Levi said to himself, but Eren heard thanks only to his proximity. "I'll call Smith's and have them deliver."

"Smith's doesn't deliver."

The cocky grin Levi gave Eren was the damn sexiest thing he'd ever seen. He'd only seen Levi smiling once or twice in photos, but never this mischievous grin. "They do for me."

That grin was all the encouragement Eren needed to spur on his confidence. After all, Levi had not yet been touched and if the pressing need against Eren's leg was anything to go by, Levi wanted to be touched. Eren reached forward, but before his hand came anywhere near the prize he lusted to take, Levi had already turned away and was dialing the number for Smith's. As the smartphone met with Levi's ear, Eren felt a flurry of jealous rage deep within him; he wanted to annihilate the tiny object that dare steal Levi's attention.

Instead of act on his impulse to destroy something that likely cost a month's wages, Eren unceremoniously grabbed Levi and spun him around. The man cussed but was powerless against the momentum of the turn, losing the wind in his lungs as his back collided with a wall. He had no time to question Eren's behavior and could only watch in awe as Eren sank to his haunches before him, his tracksuit pants in tow.

"Hello…" Levi said unsurely as he watched his semi-erect cock spring free before Eren's lips.

Eren smirked; never before had he heard Levi anything less than perfectly controlled. While it was a far cry from being flustered, the man was definitely taken aback by Eren's actions…and Eren loved it. Yet again, Levi's reaction in this moment only reiterated just how much of a human he was, just how much of a _man_. Eren's only wish was that Levi could be _his_.

Levi's cock was picturesque. Eren had seen it before, but back then it was in the trembling heat of wild lust and uncertainty, in the dark of a bedroom he had no business being in. Now the atmosphere was lit and open, and Levi's cock was presented before Eren in all its glory, with the man's undeniable consent. Only half-hard, it hung haphazardly before Eren as if begging for a breath of life to be breathed into it. Yet despite its state of semi arousal, it was thick, with one large vein tracking along its length to the foreskin that only half covered the perfectly rounded head.

Eren had seen many cocks in his days of watching porn, and as he knelt faced with this one, he wished he could have been jerking off to it instead.

"Uh, yeah," Levi said before clearing his throat. "Are you at the restaurant?"

When Eren's fingers wrapped around Levi's cock, it jolted as if an electrical current tore through it. Although mostly impassive, even Levi could not deny the effect that simple touch had on him; he stiffened for just a second before his fingers threaded through the thick brown locks of Eren's hair. That action alone was enough to tell Eren that the advance was more than welcome.

"I need a favor."

It never ceased to amaze Eren just how quickly a cock could become erect. He had seen it on himself; it could take a matter of seconds to go from completely flaccid to being as rigid as tungsten. Feeling Levi get hard in his hand – feeling the pulsing, heated flesh grow thicker in his grasp, lengthening before his very eyes – had Eren's own need pressing in his trousers. It couldn't have taken more than five seconds for Levi to reach what Eren assumed to be his full size, and knowing that it was because of _him_ and _his touch_ had Eren borderline euphoric.

"I need a pizza delivered to my house."

Cautiously, somewhat unsurely – Eren had never touched an uncut cock before – Eren slid his hand down Levi's length, pulling the foreskin back and exposing the head of the ravenous beast. As the deep red tip of Levi's cock became exposed, Eren could feel his own length twitch, aching for touch, because the sight of Levi was damn-near orgasmic. The round head was almost burgundy in color, the deep shade of red Eren recognized as that of a man who had been edging for a damn long time. It was the color Eren associated with a cock desperately begging for release, of a man so close to the edge that even the slightest touch could send him tumbling over.

"None of your business!"

Eren chuckled quietly at the strain in Levi's voice, wondering if the person on the other end of the line could hear it too. The fingers in his hair became a fist, tugging lightly at a handful of hair now captive by a strong hand. It may have just been a tug, but there was an unspoken warning behind it that Eren dare not seek confirmation about by looking up into Levi's eyes. Instead, Eren leaned in closer to his much-coveted treat, aching to taste that which was denied him before.

"Please…"

Did Eren imagine that or was there an underlying desperation to that single word?

Taking it as just that, Eren slid the head of Levi's cock into his mouth. The man stiffened and the grip on Eren's hair became painful as the young brunette pursed his lips around Levi's head, tongue running across the smooth skin and wetting it as it lay nestled in the warmth of Eren's mouth. Eren didn't see it, but he imagined by the slight inching forward of Levi's hips that the man had his head thrown back and was fighting back an expletive as he spoke with the person he had called.

"Uh…yeah…"

Levi's voice was becoming more strained; it was impossible not to notice it now. Eren idly wondered if the person on the other end could hear – and if they could, what they were thinking – as he took more of Levi into his mouth.

"I'll give the boy two hundred bucks extra if he ah!"

That was the moment the head of Levi's cock touched the back of Eren's throat.

Levi growled and cleared his throat. "Five hundred, a grand…name the price."

At that, Levi started thrusting. Eren balked; he did not quite expect this, but it was definitely not unwelcome. There was nothing rough or desperate about the action, but rather a smooth and controlled rhythm as Levi gently thrust his cock in and out of Eren's mouth. Taking the hint, the brunette relaxed his jaw and let Levi take what he wanted. Feeling the warmth of Levi's flesh gliding along his tongue was enough to have Eren a trembling mess; he could feel his thigh becoming wet from the precum trickling out of his own cock.

"Just no olives or fruits," Levi said, his voice eerily calm.

Eren wondered if it was the calm before the storm.

Levi's thrusts gained confidence then. The tentative, unsure little rolls of his hips became more earnest, still nothing violating but enough to have Eren consciously chanting to himself to prevent himself from gagging. With moans unable to escape his occupied throat, Eren was left quiet and breathless, palming at himself through his pants as Levi fucked his mouth.

The fact that one of his greatest fantasies was coming true would have been enough to have Eren cum then and there. However, he held his own; if he had not cum only minutes before, he had no doubt that he would've already had a sizable wet patch on his pants.

"How long will it take?"

And then Levi thrust deep into Eren's mouth and did not snap his hips back. Eren found his nose buried in the smoothly shaven area of Levi's pubic mound. Held in place by a vice grip, Eren could do nothing but hold his breath and hope that Levi would be merciful enough to allow him to breathe soon.

"Double if you can make it thirty."

Just as Eren was about to cough for air, Levi unceremoniously yanked him back by the hair. It hurt…oh god, it hurt so good. Eren gasped for air as he was pulled from the treat he had been lusting after for days. Drunk on lust, Eren did not care for the wet strings attached to Levi's cock from his mouth. He did not care that his own saliva was dripping down his chin like he was some rabid animal. All that mattered to him was that in this moment, he was Levi's and he wanted the man to do whatever he pleased.

"Thanks, Erwin. I owe you one."

With no warning, another hand joined the first and Eren's face was thrust back into its previous position with Levi's taut balls resting against his chin. He choked a little as Levi's cock hit the back of his throat, but offered no protest at being held in place like this.

"You naughty little shit!" Levi hissed.

Leaning down on Eren's head a little, Levi held Eren securely in place. Eren stroked his own cock through the tracksuit pants as Levi pinned him.

"Do you want me to fuck your mouth while I'm on the phone with a friend?"

If Eren could hum in agreement, he would've, but he had a mouth and throat full of cock. If he could even nod his head, he would've, but he was pinned in place by a man possessing unnatural strength. Instead, Eren stayed still, feeling the familiar light-headedness of oxygen deprivation creeping up on him as Levi denied him the right to breathe.

"Such a good boy," Levi suddenly cooed.

Tearing himself away from Eren, Levi let the brunette breathe. Eren gasped for air, his saliva running down his chin and falling to his chest and lap. Levi's cock shone from its slickness, and _damn_ it looked amazing. Eren wanted it back in his mouth; he wanted Levi to take him.

"Look at you," Levi said. He tilted Eren's head back, forcing emerald eyes to meet with his own. "You're filthy."

Eren could only nod. He was powerless under the weight of Levi's gaze. The eyes that held the promise of pain, were now overcome with a darkness Eren's wildest fantasies could not conjure up as Levi gazed down at him. The lust in them was rampant to the point where Levi barely looked like a cognitive human being. To Eren, it felt like he was being looked at as nothing more than a hole to be used for Levi's pleasure…and he _loved_ it.

"You want me to fuck your little mouth, don't you?"

Eren smiled drunkenly and nodded. Actually, he did not care what Levi did to him as long as the man used him to cum. He was simply too far taken by lust to formulate even a single sentence.

"Fuck, Eren."

Levi slid his cock into Eren's slick mouth. It pulsated and swelled up as it brushed against Eren's tongue, and Eren knew Levi would not last long. Judging by how his cock looked, and now how it felt, Levi would come undone in a matter of minutes, if even that.

Within seconds, Levi had found a steady rhythm. His fingers gripped Eren's hair tightly as he held the boy in place, hips rolling back and forth to drive his impressive cock in and out of Eren's mouth. All Eren could do, at the mercy of the object of his infatuation, was kneel obediently and let Levi use him. The rubbing of his cock through his pants had stopped as he gave Levi his undivided attention, but the sheer arousal of Levi Ackerman claiming him in this way was enough to push Eren over the edge without even being touched.

As suddenly as Levi had taken him, he stopped, pulling his cock out of Eren's mouth with no warning. Drunk emerald eyes fluttered open just in time to see Levi massaging the deep red, slicked head of his cock until the first jet of thick, white cum shot out and right onto Eren's face. Feeling the warm fluid striking his skin only added to the push, and as another stream hit his lips, Eren's own release wet his thigh. The pleasure that tore through the brunette was monumental; he was glad that he was already on the ground, otherwise he would have fallen over from the sheer magnitude of pleasure assaulting him.

Levi rubbed at the head of his cock until he had emptied himself on Eren's face and chest, slowing down as he rode out his orgasm.

Levi's hand threaded through Eren's thick locks again, only this time, it was a gentle touch. Levi tilted Eren's head up, and looked down at the brunette with sleepy, almost bored eyes and said, "You're a filthy brat, you know?"

The brunette could only offer up an apologetic smile, though there was absolutely nothing to be sorry about.

"Did you cum in your pants?" Levi asked.

Eren's eyes immediately fell to his lap. Of course it would be noticeable – the lightly colored tracksuit was a canvas for any fluids, and the large, wet spot in his lap was far from inconspicuous.

"You're really an insatiable brat."

For the first time in what felt like hours, Eren spoke. "I am only twenty-two, you know."

"Yeah, yeah," Levi said. He offered a hand to Eren, who gladly took it and came to stand before Levi. "Go get yourself cleaned up. You really are a mess."

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 **Sexy times *does a celebratory booty dance***

 **I hope you enjoyed. Please leave your thoughts and love (I need love).**

 **OS**


	30. Chapter 30: Jealousy

**A/N: Your positive feedback gave me some fuel, so I wrote more! I hope you enjoy a little bit of Jean's perspective.**

 **NOTE: I apologize for any errors in this chapter, and the past couple, as all of them were posted without much editing. Time is not my friend.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in the story.**

 **NOTE 2: It is never my intention to make anyone feel uncomfortable, but I am a hermit and socially awkward individual so I don't always realize the repercussions some things may have. I would like to apologize to anyone my wording may have offended. It has been brought to my attention, and I have fixed it up and re-posted the chapter. You guys and gals are the lifeblood of this story, and I never want anyone to be in a negative space because of it. ^.^**

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" _You can't ditch training forever. You have a competition coming up."_

Jean sighed; of course Marco was right. Was Marco not always right? He was more than just a flat mate to Jean; he was Jean's voice of reason, and his best friend. Marco had a level-headedness to him that was infectious, and he had a cool, grossly understated confidence that made him incredibly dependable. His quiet personality masked his ability to take charge, but the more Jean thought about it, the more he realized that Marco was a man who knew what he wanted and how to get it, and was not afraid to do just that. Perhaps that was why he had been top of his class in law for three years straight. It was more than enough to earn Jean's respect, and as a result, despite Marco's quiet personality, Jean always listened to the man.

Marco had stood beside Jean through the worst of the worst. On nights when he wanted to nothing more than drink himself to sleep, Marco would be the one to take the bottle away and quietly reason with him until he sobered up. No one had seen more of his tears than Marco. It was Marco who had forced Jean to face the reality – he loved Eren, and he had fucked up, _big time_ , when he let Eren go. Marco was the one who pushed Jean to face the facts, to man up and take responsibility for what he had done. It was Marco who had pushed Jean to speak to Eren, Marco who had made Jean grovel. If Jean ended up hurt tenfold, it would be Marco's fault, but if Jean ended up reclaiming the man that he loved, it would be thanks to none other than Marco.

And it was thanks to Marco that Jean found himself at the dojo when all he wanted to do was hide away forever.

That man was an angel and a demon all in one.

Having spent most of his Sunday nursing a violent hangover, Jean did not have much to do, aside from face his festering thoughts. Paralyzed by the pain of having had several drinks too many the night before, Jean could not run from the memories that held him in their grasp, violently catapulting him between self-pity and self-loathing – self-pity thanks to the pitiful state he was now in, and self-loathing thanks to what he had subjected himself to the night before.

Drunk, horny and in desperate need of some form of intimacy – even just the delusion thereof – Jean had bent over and let Eren have his way with him. As always, a few drinks led him spiraling down a path where he wanted nothing more than to have something, anything, worth writing home about with Eren. Only this time, Eren had had a few drinks too, and seemed all too happy to oblige. Though drunk, Jean had been cognitive the whole time, and despite having seen that Eren was entirely detached and simply going through the motions of a man fulfilling a primal urge, Jean did not care. To have felt Eren inside him after so long was incredible, and even though Jean did not cum as Eren fucked him, that feeling of fullness was what he sought.

But after Eren had had his fill, that warmth and fullness was stolen from Jean with frightening violence.

Jean would never forget the look of absolute revulsion on Eren's face as he was shoved out of the cubicle, with his pants still pooled around his ankles. Despite being drunk, Jean knew that he would never be able to unsee what he had seen – a look of disgust and pure hatred on a face that was usually filled with joy. What he had seen on Eren's face in that moment was something he had only ever seen in movies – it was the look of a man lusting for blood. If Eren had been any more cognitive, Jean might had even feared for his life.

Of course he had tried to get hold of Eren on Sunday, but every time he called, it went straight to voicemail. He had begun to worry for Eren's safety – Eren had been far from sober when he last saw him – but he knew it was not his place. He'd resisted the urge to call Mikasa, and instead took to the couch, hating himself for what he had done, until Marco had come to the rescue and saved him from entering into a full depressive spiral.

He skipped training on Monday, afraid to see Eren again, but Marco had talked him into manning up and facing the music.

When Jean walked into the dojo, he kept to himself. Eyes downcast, and only greeting when greeted, he quietly skulked to the locker room. As he stored his bags, he hoped that Eren would walk into the locker room but in the same breath he dreaded it. So when it did not happen, Jean found himself feeling a strange mix of relief and disappointment.

Jean secured his wireless earphones and played a metronome of 130 beats per minute to begin his warm up on the skipping rope. After five minutes, it would increase to 150bpm, and thereafter would randomly increase in increments of ten until 200bpm. He would skip for fifteen minutes. However, barely five minutes had passed before a commotion at the back of the dojo penetrated the quiet beat of the metronome.

He tried to ignore it, but he simply couldn't. What started as a scuffle and loud laughter eventually erupted into loud cheers, whistling and laughter that completely broke Jean's concentration. The skipping rope jammed under the balls of his feet, and with a quietly hissed expletive he threw it to the ground and turned to see what all the fuss was about.

The center of attention was none other than Eren Yeager himself.

Eren was standing on top of a massive tractor tire, laughing as he fought to find his balance on the thing. Why did seeing Eren happy hurt just as much as it brought Jean joy? Was it because he was not the one who had brought that dazzling smile to Eren's lips? Did it hurt because he was nothing more than a spectator at a distance? He could not hear the deep rumble of Eren's laughter; trapped behind the glass, watching from afar, all Jean could do was imagine, and remember, the happiness in his ex-lover's voice as Eren swayed and wobbled atop the tire, shoulders shaking as he laughed.

Despite the pang of hurt at seeing that which he wished he could have induced, Jean found himself joining the crowd that was watching Eren.

"Ready?" That was Levi's voice.

"Hit me!" Eren cried out, tapping his gloved fists against one another.

A medicine ball was launched at Eren. He dodged it expertly, wobbling a bit on the ball but regaining his balance soon after the disturbance. Everyone watching erupted in cheer, but Eren seemed unfazed by this. He was focused on the next projectile, which was launched at him in such a way that it was impossible to dodge. He punched it, stopping it dead in its path and sending it to the floor with a dull thud. Another cheer erupted from the crowd.

Jealousy began to burn in Jean's gut, though he couldn't place it. Was he jealous because he couldn't be closer to Eren, or was he jealous because Eren was being trained by the famed Levi Ackerman?

The crowd erupted in wild cheer again, tearing Jean from his thoughts. The projectiles were being launched at Eren at an ever increasing pace. He bobbed and weaved to dodge what he could, and punched at the balls he could not escape from. Panting and cussing as he worked to maintain his balance on the ball, inching back and forth as he treaded along its track, Eren expertly split his focus between staying upright and fighting the barrage of projectiles. The way his body moved was so unlike what Jean was used to; Eren was lithe, quick, in balance and moved with a powerful fluidity one would not expect of someone like him.

That only made Jean's jealousy grow. Added to that, Jean realized that if Eren continued like this for another fortnight, there was a damn good chance that he would get beaten.

It took a herculean effort to tear his eyes from the admittedly impressive display and return to his own training. However, with his head elsewhere, it proved fruitless, even under the guidance of the sensei. He didn't need the sensei breathing down his neck to tell him his form was sloppy and his technique unguided. He was, however, thankful that they were only working on the bags and not sparring today – if he were to spar, he would have been taken out within seconds, he was sure.

At the end of a disappointing and quite frankly wasteful training session, Jean found himself in the locker room fighting a deep ache gnawing at his chest. He felt breathless, not from the training but from a paralysis emanating from his very core that was quickly creeping to his peripherals. Bare-chested and leaning against the cool metal of the lockers, Jean tried but failed to fight back the flood of memories and emotions that had been threatening to assault him for days.

 _Why here, why now?_ Jean asked himself as he pinched his eyes shut. Drawing in deep breaths, he put up a valiant fight, but the pressure was too much. He had been holding it in for too long, lying to himself and fighting against the grim reality that he was a man who had it all and then lost it. No, he did not lose it; he threw it all away. Eren was his, but he gave it up…and for what? Nothing.

The memory of meeting Eren came to his mind – the insufferable, arrogant but sociable Eren that immediately stole his eye upon entering the dojo. The feisty brunette that fought like a kid off the streets and fucked like he was making a living off of sex. Eren Yeager…Jean remembered it all: their first kiss, the first time they fucked (right here against this very locker), their first fight both in and outside of the ring, their first date and the first time they had said "I love you" to one another. It all came back to him, weighing him down and tearing him apart as he stood, losing the battle against a pain that he would not wish upon his worst enemy.

Why did he give it up? Honestly, thinking back he could not even remember the reason he had given Eren when he had ended it all. And if he could turn back time, he would never have done it.

Self-loathing regret was too gentle a term for what he was feeling right now.

The locker room door opened then. Jean cringed at the thought of being caught in this vulnerable state and immediately drew in a deep breath in a last-ditch effort to pull himself together, at least enough so that he could get to his car. He could break down there, in private, or hopefully make it home where his pillar of support, Marco, would be waiting.

"Jean."

That was Eren's voice. Jean would be able to recognize it even fifty years from now. He swallowed thickly and turned to Eren, fixing what he hoped to be a convincing smile in place.

"Hey, Eren."

Eren's skin was flushed. It immediately brought back the memory of their wildly explosive and passionate sex life to the forefront of Jean's mind. He could not stop it; with Eren panting, chest bare and his wet shirt flung haphazardly over his left shoulder, it was impossible not to remember what that perfect body looked like sprawled beneath him on his bed.

"How are you?" Jean asked, fighting to keep his eyes from running the length of Eren's body.

"I'm fine."

Eren turned to his own locker and yanked it open, turning his body away from Jean. Jean idly wondered if Eren were trying to shield his exposed chest from the prying eyes of his ex-lover.

"Hey, uhm…" Jean frowned, wondering what he should say next. He wanted to talk to Eren, to present his case before the judge and jury and hopefully be let off. He just wanted Eren back. "What are you doing now after…this?"

Eren paused his rummaging through his locker. He drew in a deep breath, and Jean could only imagine that, behind the locker, Eren was clenching his jaw. "I have plans."

"Tomorrow?"

"I'm busy."

The familiar niggle of irritation spiked within Jean; for all the good Eren brought out in him, that bastard had the uncanny ability to drive Jean up the wall without even trying. "Thursday? Friday? Saturday?"

Eren offered no answer, further agitating Jean.

"Eren, we need to talk."

With a deep sigh, Eren emerged from behind the locker door. Emerald eyes that were always full of warmth and excitement were devoid of all emotion. They were dull, dead almost, as they met with Jean's with an impassiveness that was uncharacteristic of Eren. It frightened Jean to see this; Eren looked like a man who had seen too much, like a soldier who had suffered and had passed the point of no return. Jean wondered, _did I do that to him?_

"I don't have anything to say to you, Jean." Eren's voice was flat, matter-of-fact. This was not the Eren Jean knew.

"Eren, please…" Jean cringed internally at how desperate he sounded, but it was that very desperation that caught Eren's attention. Something flashed in Eren's eyes then…Jean could not place it, but he knew that it appealed to some part of the Eren he had known. "Look…I…" Jean had no idea what to say. He fought for words, but none came. None too soon, Eren lost interest.

Eren turned back to his locker and fished out a shirt, covering his bare chest before retrieving his personal items from his locker. He would be leaving soon.

"Eren, I'm sorry, okay?" Jean tried. Eren paused, shoulder to Jean and eyes on the locker. "I know it's not going to make everything better or change what has been done, but I really am fucking sorry. You said you would think about it and talk to me but it's been days and it seems like all you're doing is avoiding me."

That caught Eren's attention. He turned to Jean then, eyes holding that lethal threat Jean had seen only days earlier. "Avoiding you?"

Jean knew what Eren was referring to. "Eren…"

"Jean, I don't want to talk to you right now." Eren turned away and was about to make for the locker room door when Jean's words brought him to a stop.

"Will you ever want to talk to me?" Jean waited, but Eren did not respond. He waited, eyes on the broad shoulders he had grown to love, but nothing came. "If you don't want to do this, just say so. If you want to, talk to me. The waiting is driving me fucking crazy, Eren."

Those broad shoulders rose as Eren took a deep breath. He turned his head slightly, enough to give Jean his attention, but not enough to make eye contact. But despite the lack of eye contact, the look in Eren's eyes was one Jean instantly recognized as the look of defeat.

"You…" Jean's voice cracked. "You don't want to do this, do you?" No reply. "You don't want to try." Yet again, nothing. "Eren…have you thought about this…about us…at all?"

The reply was instantaneous. "No."

That single word was like a white-hot sword through Jean's heart. He could feel his flesh melting as the grim reality assaulted him.

"What about Saturday night?" Jean whispered.

Eren whirled around then, eyes livid as they met with Jean's. "Don't dare fucking bring that up! I was drunk."

Those words were not at all unexpected, but it still hurt to hear. Jean lifted his chin up, sparing what little dignity he had left as he asked, "So it meant nothing to you then?"

"Yes."

The lie was obvious. Behind Eren's anger was a man guarded, uncertain and just as hurt as Jean was. Jean only knew this because he knew Eren, because he knew that he and Eren were similar in the way they masked their pain, and how they held their pride.

"Eren…don't lie to me…"

"I'm not lying, Jean!" Eren snapped. "You think that coming back and saying sorry is going to change anything?" He laughed humorlessly. "How long have I had to wait for that fucking sorry? Months! Say I do give you a second chance…how long is it going to take for you to get your shit together? Months? You've fucked me around enough, Jean. I'm done with this…I'm done with you."

Nothing Jean could say would change the truth. He simply stood still, trembling as the crippling weight of the reality that Eren no longer wanted him weighed down on him. Though as he stood there, eyes on his furious ex, he couldn't help but wonder what it was that drove Eren to this point.

After his tryst with Eren over the weekend, Jean had felt like shit. He felt used, betrayed and worth absolutely nothing. And all of that after one time Eren had shamelessly used him. How many times had he done that to Eren? Well over a dozen, two dozen perhaps. He had done the same thing, again and again. Was this how Eren felt every single time? Jean couldn't fathom having this feeling not only repeating, but compounding over months. Any person put under this strain continuously would eventually snap. Did Eren snap?

"Eren…"

"No," Eren said, finality in his voice. "Saying sorry isn't going to change a damn thing."

Without another word, Eren turned and walked away. Jean was left standing in the empty locker room with nothing but the echo of the door shutting reverberating in his mind. Three days ago he would have been surprised if Eren had said there was no future for them, but after having gone through what Eren had, Jean could do nothing but accept the fact that he had broken the man he loved, and would likely never get a second chance.

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 **Thanks for reading, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls and all those in between ^.^**

 **OS**


	31. Chapter 31: Facade

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews, ladies and gents :) It's keeping the inspiration coming! I hope you all had a wonderful weekend.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

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Fighting an inanimate object had never presented any sort of problem to Eren before. On the contrary; Eren enjoyed unleashing his aggression on a punching bag; there was something incredibly satisfying about attempting to annihilate something that could not fight back. Call it a predatory instinct or simply just enjoying the reward without the risk of being hurt back, but whatever it was, Eren loved it. Besides unleashing pent up aggression and frustration, there was also a mind-numbing tranquility that came with the repetitive pounding of fists on a bag.

However, this… _thing_ …that Levi had lent him was proving to be far from satisfying or relaxing.

FitLight Trainer, Levi had called it. Confuse-the-fuck-out-of-me is what Eren preferred. The concept was simple: eight lights were to be placed at varying heights and distances from a person's core, all within arm's reach. These lights would illuminate at random, and the user would then have to tap at the light to turn it off. The idea behind the system was to improve hand-eye coordination and reaction time.

Levi's demonstration of the system was flawless. He had the lights up against the dojo mirror and barely missed a single one. His recognition of and reaction to each flash was impeccable, and Eren could only stare in awe as Levi effortlessly explained the system whilst simultaneously outsmarting it. He had also mentioned that he had appeared in an advertisement for it when it launched, which only added to his proficiency.

"Fucking hell!" Eren growled out as he missed yet another light.

Out of sheer frustration, Eren turned to the punching bag dangling lifelessly from the garage wall and drove his fist into it with the power of a man with a thirst for blood. As his bare fist connected with the bag, the familiar thud of impact came with an unwelcomed pain that thrust Eren to relive a memory he had no desire to ever recall.

Valentine's Day.

Eren yanked his hand back from the bag, jaw clenched and scowling fiercely as he brought it to his face to be inspected. The pain, although nothing more than a dull throb, seemed to penetrate down to the bone and reverberate through his entire hand. Little scabs on his knuckles brought back that fateful Valentine's Day, not too long ago, where Eren had unleashed his wrath for Jean upon a pillar in the parking lot.

It felt like it had been months since Jean had shamelessly used him and left him feeling broken. Although despite time having been warped by the recent developments in his life, Eren would not forget the foul taste of hatred on his tongue and the sheer rage coursing through his body as he realized he had been fooled, and used, yet again. He attacked the pillar, thankful that Jean had left, because the hatred he had felt in that moment was enough to have him murder that son of a bitch. The hatred was so powerful that even when it drove him to self-mutilation, he did not stop. Had it not been for the years of arduous conditioning, and torture, to harden his fists into delivering shockingly powerful blows, Eren was sure he would have broken every single bone in his hands.

For the first time in years, that Valentine's Day, Eren had drawn blood from his hands.

As the throbbing began to subside, Eren placed his hands on his hips, closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He did this several times in an attempt to push that memory to the back of his mind. If he wanted to master this damn FitLight Trainer, he would need to focus every ounce of his energy on it. He could not afford to let his mind wander; it would inevitably lead him to thinking about Jean, and all that that would do would rile Eren up, and then he would be nothing more than a raging, broken man fighting on instinct and the desire to kill.

Jean was his greatest weakness…both in and out of the ring.

Eren balked mid-breath. A person is not supposed to try and avoid their weakness, but rather to confront it and overcome it. Weakness would always exist; a person's reaction to it is what determines whether that weakness is just a stat or a fatal flaw.

The effect Jean had on him could be used to break him or drive him. Thus far it had only done the former. If Eren could embrace it, channel it and overcome it, no amount of taunting would deter his focus, thus enabling him to be the victor.

Eren smiled a wicked smile and said, "I'm gonna fucking own you, bitch."

He picked up his phone and searched for an apt song – _Façade_ by Disturbed. While the context of the lyrics was not quite parallel with his situation, the song was apt enough. He set the volume full on his Bazooka and let the music guide him as he allowed the negativity of Jean's very existence come to the forefront of his mind.

As the music started to play, Eren allowed his mind to focus on Jean while his eyes remained fixed on the lights before him. As they flashed, Eren drew deep breaths to centralize his visual focus, and as the lyrics began, his arms darted forth to tap the lights whilst his lips carried the anger of his voice as he sang, lost to the music.

 _No one knows just what has become of her  
Shattered doll, desperate  
Oh so innocent and delicate  
But too damn obdurate  
And obstinate to let go _

He growled as the negativity compounded with each strike of the guitar's strings, but despite the growing rage Eren's form was on point. He was striking each light perfectly, lips curled in a snarl as he spit out the lyrics angrily, letting his hatred guide him as he briefly imagined the lights placed on Jean's body instead of the wall.

 _Broken down, hurt again, it never ends  
Frightened and trembling  
Did she fall again? An accident?  
Her eyes encircled in black again  
I can't believe that she's still with him _

"Why!" Eren cried out, as he launched into the chorus.

For how long will you try?  
How long until you walk away?  
Your façade can't disguise  
The fact that you're in misery

And then he laughed. For a moment, he ignored the lights before him, threw his head back and laughed curtly. Oh, misery was not a strong enough word for what he had been in. He had been in hell. As the instrumentals lead into the second verse, Eren returned his focus to the wall before him. He could feel the evil in his glare as he stared at the lights for just a second before resuming his assault on them. He could feel the hate seeping out of his pores like sweat, and he loved it.

 _Look inside see what has become of her  
Hiding within again  
Can she pick herself up again?  
It's just too difficult and arduous to let go _

Another growl; the truth in that single line hit home, and it hit home hard. At times, it seemed impossible to let Jean go no matter what that bastard did to him. Jean used him and made him feel like shit time and again, yet despite this, Eren could not let go, even though he knew he _had_ to. Was it really love, or just a petty lustful addiction?

 _Homicide flashes through her mind again  
No more pain, take control  
If he raises his hand again  
She'll find her freedom in killing him _

A sinister smile touched Eren's lips as he sang, " _The world will see that she's had enough_ "

For how long will you try?  
How long until you walk away?  
Your façade can't disguise  
The fact that you're in misery

For how long will you try?  
How long until you walk away?  
From the look in your eyes  
I know you bleed internally

The instrumental piece had Eren bleeding. Not blood, not sweat, but bleeding out the hatred and negativity that had consumed him for so long. He attacked the Trainer with a proficiency he had never thought possible for someone of his experience level, an agility and accuracy that he had seen on the master himself, and none other. And with each strike of a palm to a light, Eren felt another ounce of bad energy leave him, another breath of relief wash over him as the burden of unadulterated hatred was being freed, one blitzing strike at a time.

 _For how long will you deny?  
How long until you walk away?  
Your façade can't disguise  
The fact that you're in misery  
_

And then he stopped completely. He clenched his fists at his side and threw his head back as if seeking an answer from a godly entity, and like this, he yelled the lyrics of the song, in an attempt to reach the crescendo of the cleansing ceremony.

 _For how long will you try?  
How long until you walk away?  
From the look in your eyes  
I know you bleed internally  
_

Eren took a deep breath and closed his eyes then, not singing but simply mouthing the final lyrics.

 _Broken down, hurt again  
It never ends_

The song ended then. There was no outro, no decline in the ferocity of the music or quieting down of the instruments. The song simply ended, abruptly, much like whatever it was that was going on between Eren and Jean. Barely two weeks ago, Eren would have given anything for another chance with Jean. Now he wanted nothing more to do with the man and would be damned if he ever saw that pretty face intact again. He huffed a humorless laugh as he thought of the sweet glamor that would come with making that bastard bleed.

"Eren?"

When the brunette turned around, he found Mikasa standing at the doorway of the garage, still wearing her uniform. Eren often wondered if it was navy blue so that bloodstains and other bodily fluids would be less identifiable on the fabric, but he had never bothered to ask.

"Hey, Mika," Eren said, smiling. For once, he did not have to force it.

"Are you okay?"

He captured his bottom lip between his teeth to stifle a tired sigh. Mikasa had an unnatural concern for him that he had eventually learnt to tolerate over the years – as she had also learnt to control – but it was still frustrating to know that she would always regard him as her baby brother.

"Yeah," Eren replied. "I was actually just finishing up."

Mikasa nodded before her gaze shifted to the wall behind Eren, with lights still flashing at random. "What's that?"

"Oh, this?" Eren turned slightly and pointed at the FitLight Trainer. "Levi lent this to me. It's for hand-eye coordination and stuff. It's pretty cool."

"Levi…" Mikasa frowned slightly. "Levi Ackerman?"

Eren already knew that he had said too much. While he was already a pretty shitty liar, he could deflect a topic easily enough – provided he wasn't already riled up – but if there was one person his deflection tactics did not work on, it was Mikasa. She also happened to be the only person he could never get away with lying to. Not only was her ability to see through him unmatched, but she also intimidated him enough so that when under stress, nothing but the unbridled truth would ever leave his lips. Oh, he had tried to lie, but it ended up being nothing more than a stuttering mess, which Mikasa quickly got to the bottom of.

"Is he the man you're spending so much time with recently?" Mikasa asked.

Eren cringed as the inevitable questioning began. He couldn't lie about his whereabouts; he had no other alibi, and Mikasa would have known if he had been at work. If he had been hanging out with his friends, she would also have known. Even if he had been at varsity late or at the dojo, he would have mentioned it somewhere along the line to Mikasa. Now, more than ever, Eren cursed his inability to keep his day to day doings private; he hated how he loved to share everything he did.

"We've been hanging out," Eren admitted. He would not lie to Mikasa, but he would not betray Levi by divulging more information that what was critical. He had a very strong suspicion that Levi wanted their relationship to be kept completely discreet.

Mikasa raised a brow. "Socially?"

Eren narrowed his eyes. He knew exactly what Mikasa's suspicion was, and he feared that if she kept prodding at the right buttons, he would eventually slip.

"He's helping me out with some extra training."

"For what?" she asked. "And how much is he charging?"

"I have my first competition coming up, Mika," Eren snapped. He could feel the irritation growing and along with it, the frustration of knowing he could not escape Mikasa's incessant questioning. "He's preparing me so that I don't make a complete ass out of myself while representing Titan Dojo."

 _Not bad,_ Eren thought to himself, surprised at how smoothly the lie fell from his tongue

"How much?"

 _This woman_ …

"For free."

Mikasa's eyes narrowed and she folded her arms across her chest. "The dojo owner is giving you extra training after hours…for _free_?"

That little itch of irritation was growing. Eren simply turned away from Mikasa and began dismantling the lights from the wall. He was too close to being busted; had no qualms with Mikasa knowing there was another man in his life – on the contrary, he would love to show her that he was moving on from Jean – but he did not want to implicate Levi, who had explicitly told him he was very, very deeply in the closet.

"Do I even want to know what kind of extra training he is giving you that has you out for whole nights at a time?

And that was when the little growing itch exploded.

"I'm a grown man, Mikasa!" Eren spat. "What I do at night is none of your goddamn business!"

As the words left his mouth, Eren realized that he had indirectly but quite clearly implied that there was something more than just training happening with Levi. He sighed, cursing himself silently for the slip of his tongue that Mikasa was very likely hoping for. Once again, he had fallen for her tactics and found himself divulging more than he had intended.

Mikasa came to stand beside him. "Eren…I'm not trying to call you out on anything. I just worry when I get home at three in the morning and you're not here, and you haven't told me you're staying out. Please try and understand. I work with accidents and death every day, so I can't stop myself from thinking the worst when you aren't here…especially when you don't answer your phone…"

Guilt wrapped its icy fingers around Eren's heart and gave it a light squeeze as he listened to the pain and desperation in his sister's voice. Had he been so selfish, so blinded by his own ambitions that he hadn't realized what he was doing to the one person who had always been there for him? He turned and looked at Mikasa, and from up close, not even the dark navy blue could hide the massive bloodstain on her torso.

If he had known his absence made her think he was dead or in danger every time, he would never have done it.

"I'm sorry, Mika," Eren said, feeling genuine remorse. He turned away to pack away the Trainer, idly wondering if the person whose blood was on Mikasa's shirt had lived or died.

"It's okay, idiot," Mikasa said as she ruffled Eren's hair. He froze at Mikasa's sudden lighthearted demeanor. "I know by now that men can only use one head at a time."

"Mikasa!" Eren cried out as he turned to face her, genuine mortification etched in his features. Mikasa simply smirked, daring Eren to speak. It was a challenge that took Eren a moment to meet, but when he did, all he could do was ask, "What the fuck is it you think I'm doing?"

Mikasa deepened her voice before saying, " _I'm a grown man, Mikasa, what I do at night is none of your goddamn business._ "

Eren blushed. "It's not what you think."

"If you say so," Mikasa said, with a knowing smile.

"Speaking of men, don't you have one?" Eren asked. It was a futile attempt to deflect the conversation.

Unfortunately, Mikasa did not take the bait. "How the hell did you get that rich old fart to want you?"

All attempts at potentially deflecting the conversation were forgotten as the insult had Eren grab at his chest in mock shock. "Excuse me? How could he not? I'm a young, attractive, virile male. What's there not to want?"

Mikasa laughed before tugging Eren on the ear. "There's nothing wrong with your ego."

"It's just right," Eren said with a cocky smirk. "Besides, he's not a rich old fart. He's fucking sexy."

"He actually is," Mikasa admitted. "Maybe I'm just jealous of you."

"I don't blame you."

Grinning, Mikasa asked, "So you are seeing him?"

Eren rolled his eyes. Mikasa did not know when to let go. "No, Mikasa. It's not like that."

"Mhmm…"

The siblings made their way back up to the apartment where they got to work preparing dinner together. It brought a smile to Eren's heart to be able to have this quiet simplicity with his sister; the last few weeks had him out of the house more than he had been in a long time, and that with Mikasa's work schedule had them living past each other. He hadn't realized it until very recently, but Eren actually missed the hell out of his sister. He had missed her so much that simply slicing onions while she prepared burger patties was enough to make him want to give her a hug and tell her he loves her.

* * *

 **I am a far cry from an artist but I would like to draw a little something in lieu with this fic. If any of you have any ideas, drop it in the reviews or if it's too saucy, PM me ;P**

 **Hope you enjoyed the chapter!**

 **OS**


	32. Chapter 32: Friends

**A/N: I am going to apologize in advance for the length (or lack thereof) and poorer quality of this chapter. My mojo for writing has hit an all time low, amidst new developments in my life, mainly the prospect of a new job and having to move very, very far from home. So I've been a bit down and have been reading more than I have been writing.**

 **In addition to that, a new story is beginning to bubble up in my mind. Oh...and the lightning his my PC and router out two weeks back, so I lost the original chapter along with my will to live (for all of two days).**

 **This culmination of circumstances has made it difficult to write.**

 **But instead of do nothing, I tried. So, like I said, I am sorry that this one isn't too great. It is a bit fillerish, but I'd rather post something less significant than not post at all.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

Levi stared at himself in the mirror.

While he did not think he was particularly unattractive, he found there was nothing extraordinary about himself. He was short for a man and had, what he considered, bland features. The only thing about himself that he loved, and wholeheartedly drank in praise for, was his physique. It had taken years of arduous training, strict discipline and thousands of dollars to sculpt the physique that men aspired to have and women desired to bed. Despite being a recluse and despising the public eye, he had always loved the admiration he got because of his body. It was a physique he strutted around proudly – from training shirtless in the dojo to flaunt his greatest achievement, to stripping down to nothing but underwear for photo shoots, Levi jumped at any opportunity to present to the world what he considered perfection.

However, of course there was more to him than meets the eye, and that was what had him standing before the mirror, completely naked, eyeing himself skeptically.

What did Eren see in him? He was pedantic, unsociable, crass and living a completely different life to that gorgeous brat. Yet despite that, Eren had a seemingly never ending urge to be with Levi. At first, Levi thought it was nothing more than the devotion of an obsessive fan, but despite Eren's obvious admiration – although he was sure Eren thought he was doing a great job hiding it – there was a definite interest from Eren in Levi as a person. Eren had opened up to Levi and trusted him; Eren may not have been the most tactful man Levi had ever met, but it was clear that Eren was not one to speak the troubles of his soul. The fact that he had made Levi feel that whatever Eren wanted transcended a fan wanting to bed their idol.

Levi sighed. How could Eren possibly want anything more than sex from _this_?

In fact, how could anyone? God alone knows how Petra and Isabel had stuck with him as long as they had. And now look…even Petra could stomach no more.

 _Stop_ , he thought, clenching his jaw as his brows drew together in a scowl, _right there._

Levi drew in a deep breath and held it for a few seconds before slowly exhaling. The negativity was compounding and he had to stop it before his insecurity decided to rear its head amidst his hurricane of turbulent self-doubt. He looked himself dead in the eye and mentally chanted that Petra did not walk away from him; she respectfully returned her collar because she found a man that could fill the void he had never, and would never be able to fill.

He wondered if he would ever be able to fill Eren's void, whatever it may be. He wondered how long it would be before Eren too, walked away.

How long had it been since that last encounter with Petra? The encounter that stripped Levi of every ounce of self-respect and drove him to attack the bag like a rabid animal. His eyes scanned the length of his body – his shins, feet, hands and forearms still sported light scabbing from the abrasions suffered as he mutilated the bag. His shoulder still screamed every time he moved, constantly mocking his loss of control.

 _Stop, stop, stop! Fuck!_ Levi pinched his eyes shut and shook his head. _Get a grip_.

A jeering voice in the back of his mind snickered as it said, _What would Eren think if he were to see you now?_

What would Eren think? Would he see what Levi saw: a beautiful, perhaps even _perfect_ shell with an imperfect soul perverted by self-doubt, self-pity and delusions? Did Eren even know that Levi was nothing more than a broken, insecure man beneath the hardy, confident exterior the world always saw?

Of course not. _No one_ knew that. He doubted even those closest to him – his subs, whom he had opened up to, removed the veil and laid himself bare before – knew just how deeply he wallowed in self-doubt.

It was nothing more than the shadow of a rocky past.

The echo of a deep vibration broke the silence and penetrated the fort Levi had secluded himself in. His eyes dropped to his phone on the bathroom counter, hoping to see Eren's face lighting up the screen, but he was met with nothing more than a notification that a message had come in. Nevertheless, Levi reached for his phone, still holding onto the hope that his new favorite person had been the one behind the message.

He smiled and felt the shadow of doubt lessen as _**Eren Yeager**_ appeared in his notification panel.

 _ **Eren (15:10):**_ _Hey! I won't make training 2nyt. I have 2 go 2 work. I'm also on shift the weeknd but I'll be sparring 10 on Sat. Hope 2 c u!_

That brat.

If he wanted to use that nauseating slang, so be it. Two can play that game. After Levi sent the message, he hopped into the shower, hoping to wash away the remnants of negativity lingering on the peripherals of his consciousness.

 _ **Levi (15:11):**_ _Ok. C U Sat 10._

The hot water cascaded down upon him, relaxing his aching shoulder but burning the raw skin on his shins and arms. With that burn came the anger of regret; he could not believe he had fallen into such a pitiful state. His and Petra's relationship was never destined to be a permanent one, yet despite knowing this, he still felt bitter and hurt about it ending. It was only natural, though, was it not? Of course it was…but that still did not give him the right to throw a tantrum like a high school boy being dumped for the first time. He made a living off his body, and to have disrespected it to that degree was a foolish and immature decision. Levi sighed and shut off the water after having washed himself, concluding that at least that tantrum had brought him and Eren closer.

When he stepped out of the shower, he saw he had another message from the brat.

 _ **Eren (15:13):**_ _Typing like that doesn't suit you._

Levi wanted to reply. He wanted to say, _at least it got you to text like an educated human being_ , but he resisted the urge. He had nothing more to say to Eren. Right now, he had to focus on himself – both physically and psychologically.

The heat of the shower had relieved some of the pain, but Levi knew it was only a matter of time before it returned. He stood before the steamed-up mirror and rolled his shoulder around a couple of times before concluding that it would be best to see his physiotherapist…even though he dreaded the woman. He only sought her help when push came to shove, and if he hadn't been already recovering from an injury, he would have let this one slide.

Although that is how the original injury became so severe in the first place.

Taking a deep breath, Levi found her number and called. After only two rings, an enthusiastic voice answered.

" _Levi! Just hang on!_ " she started talking to someone else, but was quick to conclude that conversation with a cheerful goodbye. " _Sorry about that, Shorty. How can I help you?_ "

Hange may have been a pain in the ass, but the one thing Levi appreciated about her is that she understood his desire to get to the point of a conversation quickly. As much as she could ramble about inconsequential things, she rarely wasted time on pleasantries. Levi only called her for business.

"I hurt my shoulder again," he said, rolling it again. "When can I come see you?"

Hange sighed in exasperation; Levi could only imagine the tips of her index finger and thumb sliding up underneath her glasses as she pinched the bridge of her nose, shutting her eyes to center herself lest she assault Levi with a barrage of reprimands.

" _How bad?_ " she eventually asked.

"It hurts."

Another sigh. " _I'm open now, but I have another client at four._ "

"I'm on my way," Levi said, before hanging up.

The eccentric physiotherapist prodded and poked at Levi's shoulder, rolling it this way and that as if she were looking to inflict more pain rather than better it. It had the man hissing under his breath and flinching at her touch, yet throughout this he tried his utmost best to remain stoic; he was genuinely afraid of giving the woman the pleasure of knowing she had hit a button of pain – and he thought _he_ was a sadist. All the while, she chatted animatedly, sharing everything from what she had recently seen online to what was going on in her personal life.

"Why did you do it?" Hange suddenly asked.

The somber tone caught Levi off guard. After having been cheerfully rattling off like a machine gun, that question and the manner in which she had asked it disarmed Levi. There was genuine concern there, not just the concern a medical professional is expected to have towards their patients.

Levi opened his mouth to answer when he realized that Hange had noticed the rest of his injuries. Although the abrasions were small, barely noticeable, Levi thought, Hange had seen them.

"It's personal," Levi said. With that he jumped off of the bed and turned away from Hange as he pulled his shirt over his head. "Are we done?"

Hange sighed heavily. "Yeah, we're done. I'm going to put you in a brace." Levi groaned at this. "And you _will_ wear it and rest your shoulder, unless you want to go under the knife."

Levi turned back to Hange and raised a brow incredulously.

"Yes, Levi, it is that bad," Hange said. "Any more trauma and your body won't be able to repair itself."

There was something about the way Hange said that that made it seem as though those words were not only meant for his shoulder. Instead of question it or entertain it, Levi simply nodded and proceeded to make the payment for the session. He and Hange parted ways with barely as much as a goodbye, before Levi made his way to the dojo.

* * *

Looking across the desolate floor, Eren could hardly believe how busy the night had been. With the chairs perched neatly on spotlessly clean tables, the lights turned down and the area vacant save for the half a dozen staff members flitting about, it seemed unreal to think that only a few hours ago, this place was abuzz. The young waiter smiled to himself, pleased with his – and his colleagues' – ability to breathe life into this establishment, and to tidy up afterwards.

Eren's wristwatch beeped, and a glance down at it confirmed that it was, indeed, one in the morning. He wanted nothing more than to get home, have a mind-numbingly scorching shower and then to pass out naked on his bed. The idea of sleeping after this busy shift was damn near arousing.

"You've been pretty quiet," Armin said as he came up behind Eren.

"Quiet?" Eren asked with his brows raised in surprise.

"Not quiet," Armin said, mimicking a talking motion with his hands, "but _quiet_." He tapped his head with his fingers. "It's like you've disappeared off the face of the earth."

Eren shrugged, knowing he had no argument. "I've just been busy."

"With?"

With a sigh, Eren's eyes met those of his best friend. He wanted to tell Armin of his pending relationship with Levi – hell, who wouldn't want to divulge having been throat-fucked by arguably the hottest man on the planet? – but wondered if it would upset Levi. While Eren was not particularly a "kiss and tell" type of person, he wouldn't deny that he had a bit of a boasting streak…and this was something he desperately wanted to share.

"I hope you're not seeing Jean again," Armin said when Eren offered no answer.

"Hell no," Eren said, a little too quickly. He drew in a deep breath. To hell with it, he thought. Armin would find out one or other time. "I'm seeing someone else."

The blonde quirked a brow. "Do tell."

"Uhm…" Eren lost his bravado then. Was sharing this really a good idea? He knew Armin would never betray his trust, but he felt that it would somehow being betraying Levi's trust if he spoke about their relationship, even if it was to his best friend.

"You're not fucking that Levi guy, are you?" Armin asked, but the jesting was clear in his voice.

Eren smiled shyly, and, matching Armin's jesting tone, said,"Not quite yet."

That caught Armin's interest, as Eren hoped it would. As much as Eren wanted to share, Eren did not want to speak behind Levi's back. Eren knew, however, that his intelligent, and quite frankly conniving, best friend would easily be able to find a way a way around this, if given half a change; now that the bait had been laid, all Armin had to do was exploit Eren's inability to lie, and Eren would have the privilege of sharing the latest developments in his personal life without consciously betraying Levi. The plan was flawless, thanks only to Armin's curiosity and ability to see through Eren as if he were transparent.

"I do recall you speaking to him recently," Armin said casually. He grinned deviously then and asked, "How much _speaking_ did you do?"

Eren smirked, which was enough of a giveaway, but he could not resist the game. "We _spoke_ quite a bit. Quite a mouthful, in fact."

Armin laughed and shook his head as he gathered his personal items, Eren following suit. "That was quite quick. I never thought you'd get _talking_ so soon."

Eren shrugged. "My last conversation was a pretty shitty one. I'm desperate for decent company."

"As long as it's good," Armin reckoned. "Is this a serious conversation or are you _just talking_?"

"Well…" Eren had to think about a suitable metaphor. "We did some talking, but we never had a full conversation. He doesn't want to entertain idle chit-chat and wants a very serious conversation. And then…well, maybe that talking will become full blown verbal diarrhea."

Armin laughed. "I love you, you know? Just be careful. The lifestyles of the rich and famous…"

"I know," Eren interrupted before Armin could continue. "And trust me when I say, this isn't the case."

The two young men left the restaurant side by side, each making his way to his own car. They never spoke further, simply enjoying the silence of the night and the quiet companionship of years of friendship. When they arrived at their respective vehicles, parked side by side, they greeted one another with a friendly handshake, followed by a loose, one-armed hug, before bidding each other farewell.

As Eren drove home, he idly wondered if he should text Levi and tell the man he was done at work. He quickly decided against it, fearing he would appear too clingy. Instead, he spent the drive home in silence, reminiscing on all that had happened in the last few weeks. He found it frightening how one incident with Jean opened up the door to what had proven an exciting path. If he had never been caught that one night, he would have not been here, with Levi. The relationship they had would have been nothing but a fantasy…Eren wondered if Levi had never caught him blowing Jean, would this _ever_ have transpired?

Would he still be pining after Jean? Worse yet, would he have given Jean that second chance he all but begged for?

At the end of it all, Eren could only conclude that everything happens for a reason. The universe had its courses of action clearly laid, and each decision each individual made thus placed them on one of these paths. At the time, his decisions seemed bad, but Eren realized that if those embarrassing mistakes were never made, he would never have been able to call Levi his.

* * *

 **There has definitely been better chapters. Thanks for reading, though.**

 **As I mentioned, there is another story in my head. It's a sequel to a fic I wrote years ago, so I will be starting up with that project in the coming weeks. I won't abandon this, though, so do not fret! I'm just hoping to get some motivation back.**

 **Thanks for the ongoing support.**

 **OS**


	33. Chapter 33: Saturday That Wasn't Hell

**A/N: To the guest that reviewed the last chapter, I cannot say thank you enough. The little notification woke me this morning and reading your review made my day. I've been up and writing for nearly 6 hours now, and as a result, have churned out another 4 chapters. You are a star, thank you again.**

 **My mojo is back ;P**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

Saturday was hell. Little did Eren know what the day held in store, and if he had known when he woke up, he would have trudged through hell with a smile on his face.

The first thing that put Eren in a foul mood was a flat car battery. He had woken up with only fifteen minutes to spare to get to the dojo, which, ordinarily, would have been sufficient time to dress, eat and drive to the dojo without behaving like a hooligan on the road. However, with only five minutes to spare, he got to his car, put the key in the ignition and was met with an empty clicking sound as he attempted to engage the starter. Mikasa had already left for work, so he was unable to jump his car using hers. This left him no choice but to push his car down the road, man alone, jump in and attempt to start it like that. Fortunately, it worked, but it set him back a few minutes.

Now, not only would be late, but he would likely have to repeat this exercise after training. The five minute drive to the dojo would definitely not be sufficient to charge the dead battery.

When Eren got to the dojo, ten minutes late, he rushed in, ready to apologize to Levi, only to find the man absent. At first, he thought Levi was perhaps running late, but after forty minutes of practicing sparring techniques with his fellow fighters, Eren realized that Levi would not be coming today.

That further fouled his mood.

The final straw was when it came time to spar in the ring, Eren had to face none other than Jean Kirstein.

Hazel eyes that Eren had once loved, eyes that were unhindered in their expression and held the passionate wonder of a wild beast now looked at him with absolutely nothing behind them. Eren felt as though he were looking at a picture of a dead man – there was not a single emotion behind those glossy, hazel orbs, and the longer they remained fixed on Eren's eyes, the more unseeing they seemed to become.

It was unnerving, to say the least.

Eren had gotten used to Jean's zesty attitude; always making quirky remarks, teasing and trying his best to work Eren up before every fight. The man in the ring now was a ghost of the playful, albeit irritating, man Eren had fought against for months. The lifelessness gave the impression of an eerie calm that Eren had only ever seen in Levi. It was a calm best described as the calm before the storm, a tranquility and single-mindedness that Eren knew would lead to his obliteration in the ring.

For a moment he wished Jean would say something stupid to work him up; anger, although difficult, could be dealt with, but the instinct to flee from a superior predator was a lot harder to suppress.

The buzzer sounded. The two men would only get sixty seconds in the ring together, but sixty seconds in an enclosure with a lion would inevitably feel like a lifetime.

At first, Jean made no move. He smacked his gloved fists together and snarled around his gum guard, but made no advance. Eren assumed a fighting stance; he could not trust Jeans inaction. A coiled snake may be still but it is still poised to strike.

Then it came. Almost ten seconds in, ten seconds wherein the two men walked circles around one another, sizing the other up, that was when the lifelessness in Jean's eyes dissipated. When it did, Eren wished for it to return. Left in the wake of nothingness was hatred so deep it felt toxic. It exploded from within Jean, choking Eren and even stunning those gathered around the ring. Eren could swear he heard someone gasp.

And then the fight began.

Fueled by hatred and rage, Jean lunged at Eren.

Eren ducked, blocked and attempted to jump back, but he was powerless against Jean's sudden barrage. There was nothing coordinated or remotely practiced in Jean's swings; it was as if he were fighting on instinct and not skill. Like an untrained street brawler, Jean advanced, taking mere seconds to pin Eren against the ropes, arms held up desperately trying to shield his face from the attack.

Eren idly wondered if this was what it was like fighting against himself.

"Jean! Jean!" a familiar voice called. Sensei. The ropes shuddered. Suddenly, the barrage ceased, but Eren was too afraid to look up. "Are you fucking five? Fight properly! Restart the timer."

 _No, no, not again_! Eren cried internally, but it was too late. The timer had restarted.

"Come, Yeager," Jean sneered, hitting his gloved fists against one another again.

Eren took a deep breath and advanced. Still shaken by the sudden, violent assault, it took a concentrated effort for Eren not to revert to the infamous "fight or flight" instinct. Taking deep breaths as he advanced, Eren had to remind himself over and over again that he had become a stronger fighter in the weeks since he'd last fought Jean. All he had to do was survive one minute.

"Don't be a pussy," Jean spat. "Fucking fight me!"

"Jean!" Sensei growled out.

 _As you wish_ , Eren thought.

With that, he lunged at Jean. One jab. Another jab. While Eren kept jabbing, Jean kept blocking. It was predictable. It wasn't hard. But it was doing exactly what Eren wanted it to do; piss Jean off.

" _Younger or less experienced fighters become impatient when toyed with," Levi explained. "If you keep teasing them, they eventually lash out. The man that starts hitting first, gets tired first. The one who gets tired first, loses the fight."_

 _It was a mistake Eren had made a lot in his short career as a hobbyist fighter. Being someone who was naturally easily riled up had counted against him, but Levi had assured him if he could be the one to do the teasing first, not only would be less likely to be the one lashing out, but by initiating it, he would likely immunize himself from having it done unto him._

"Fuck!" Jean hissed as his limit was reached.

Eren had to resist the urge to smirk as he watched Jean's uncoordinated attacks begin again. Only this time, unlike a moment ago, Eren had expected it and had enough space behind him to back up, bob and weave through the barrage with ease. The thing with fighting on instinct, Levi had told Eren, was that a person's focus is singular and movements linear. More often than not, a person fighting on instinct would do little more than jab and cross, maybe hook or kick if they got desperate. A person fighting on instinct was more readable than they were unpredictable…until the desire to kill kicked in.

That was a conversation for another day, Levi had promised.

Watching it unfold before him, though, Eren could understand what Levi had said. Jean was throwing punches that, to the untrained eye, may look somewhat practiced but in actuality, there was an unnecessary amount of body weight behind each punch. This could only mean one thing; Jean would tire easily.

"Jean!" Sensei bellowed out. "Where is your form? Form!"

The realization that he had been brawling, had Jean balk, and Eren used the distraction to make his move.

" _If he's tired himself out at all, start with a power shot. It will stun him, and that will open the door for whatever else you want to do. I start with a kick because my legs are fucking strong. It_ will _floor you. If not…more for me to hit when I close that gap." Levi had looked frighteningly excited by the idea, but Eren loved it. "You should try open with that too. Your legs aren't half bad, and you have a good reach. You should be able to give a good stagger whilst keeping yourself out of harm's way."_

Eren raised his right leg and kicked. His foot connected with Jean's stomach. The force of the kick sent Jean staggering backwards, arms flailing as he lost his balance and fell to the ground, coughing. It was pitiful, really, and that was almost enough for Eren to be satisfied with what he'd done. That, and the shock of actually having floored Jean for the first time very nearly held Eren still. But he could not afford that.

" _It's more pertinent in street fighting, but I learnt one very important thing in my life: make sure your first shot is hard enough to knock him out. If it's not, you go back in and keep hitting, and don't stop until he stops moving."_

" _You'll kill a man like that…"_

 _Levi averted his eyes. "Him or me. That's all there is to it."_

With that in mind, Eren descended upon Jean and began his assault. Jean curled in on himself, desperately trying to protect his head and his torso as Eren's gloved fists relentlessly hit at whatever part of him they could. It was in that moment that Eren felt his control slipping. He could feel the fighter façade melt, his mask shattering as the euphoria of victory swirled in dangerously with his repressed instinct to destroy that what had caused him irreparable harm.

Was that the buzzer? Eren couldn't care less. Time may be up but the hurt was still there, and even when that hurt eventually dies, the scars would be there for the rest of his life. One minute was not nearly enough to atone for that.

"Eren!" Sensei's voice rang out, but Eren ignored it.

Eren was focused in the prize…fixated on his victim. The blood he was seeing only fueled his lust to destroy, and Eren could swear he felt a maniacal grin distort his facial features as he sought that sweet spot that made the crimson river flow.

"Eren!" Sensei called. This time, there was another voice too. Or was it three?

Suddenly, arms encircled his torso and he was yanked away from the man he had begun to devour. Eren felt like crying out at the loss but resisted the urge, opting instead to remain still as he was flung to the ground.

"Jean? Jean!" someone called, at the same time that another said, "What the fuck, Eren?"

That second voice he recognized. It was enough to snap him out of his murderous trance, and with unfocused eyes he scanned the dojo in search of the person he thought it was. But he had no hope of finding him; Levi hadn't been here today…why would he miraculously appear now?

"Oi, wake up, brat."

There it was again. Eren blinked again and again, pinching his eyes shut each time in the hopes of regaining his ability to see focused images. After a few seconds, sight was granted to him, and he was met with the piercing grey eyes of none other than Levi Ackerman.

"Jean's alright," Sensei said. "Go get cleaned up, kid."

 _Jean?_

Eren turned away from the greys before him and caught sight of Jean exiting the ring. He had a cloth against his face that was stained red. Aside from that, he seemed alright; he wasn't limping, and his breathing didn't seem particularly labored.

"Get up and out the ring so the next batch of brats can fight."

Eren turned back to Levi, and that was when he realized he had mistaken the intense glare for one of annoyance, when in fact, Levi was…impressed? A small twinge of happiness burned up inside the younger man, and with a nod, he got to his feet. He and Levi left the ring before Levi demanded he clean himself of his opponent's blood before they could talk any further.

At the end of it all, Eren had received a stern talking to. Sensei was not at all happy by what had transpired in the ring, but had excused Eren's behavior because Jean had not tapped out, meaning it was expected for the referee to intervene. All in all, it was good practice for everyone, and no one had gotten hurt. The blood had come from Jean biting his own tongue upon falling.

"That was quite something," Levi said, as Eren gathered his belongings.

Eren looked towards Levi, and saw that the man was looking at the ring. Jean was back in the ring, fighting Annie. She was kicking his ass, but every time she had Jean pinned in some way, she backed away. Either she was showing off, or she wanted uninterrupted practice.

"She's good," Eren said. "She's top in her age group in the country."

"I know."

 _Duh._

Once Eren was dressed and ready to leave, he remembered his car would likely not start. That brought back the foul mood from earlier, only now it was compounded; not only would he need to find a way to get home, but he would have to buy a new battery before the weekend was over. He had semester tests the upcoming week, and the last thing he needed was to miss a test because of his car.

The debacle of his car reminded him of another thing.

"Where were you this morning?" Eren asked Levi.

Levi turned to Eren, interest sparking in his eyes as he asked, "Did you miss me?"

"No," Eren said, snorting.

"Keep telling yourself that," Levi simply said before turning back to the ring. A moment of silence passed before the buzzer sounded. Annie and Jean bowed at each other before exiting the ring. The next two got poised to fight. "I had something to take care of this morning."

For the first time since seeing Levi, Eren noticed that the man's arm was in a brace. Even though he itched to ask about it, he knew that topic was forbidden; he sincerely doubted Levi wanted to relive being seen the way he had been that day.

"Oh, okay," Eren simply said.

"Eren," Levi said, before turning his undivided attention to the younger man. "What are your plans for the rest of the weekend?"

Eren knew he had to study. He also knew that if he so much as mentioned the fact that he had tests next week, Levi would put whatever he had in mind on hold. Eren did not want that, so he lied as best he could.

"Nothing," he said. Levi raised a brow. "I was just going to chill at home." Only half a lie.

"Would you like to spend some time with me?" Levi asked.

 _What kind of a question is that?_ Eren thought, rolling his eyes as he smiled. "Of course, yeah."

A barely perceptible smile touched Levi's lips. Eren wondered if anyone else would have been able to see it. "Go home, freshen up, and then we can meet up for lunch. Then I can take you home." Levi leaned closer to Eren. "And do unspeakable things to you."

Grinning, Eren whispered, "I don't put out on the first date."

Without missing a beat, Levi said, "You had my cock down your throat. Your first date policy is null and void."

A deep blush exploded across Eren's skin as Levi turned and walked away from him, making towards the dojo door. If this had been a private setting, Eren would have fought back somehow – he had no idea what he would say to Levi while he was drowning in his own embarrassment, but he would have done or said _something_. Here, he was powerless, and could only watch as Levi walked away. Nearly a minute passed before Eren was spurred into action.

"Levi!" he called, just as the man exited the dojo. Levi stopped, and once Eren was outside, he turned towards the brunette. "I'd love to meet you for lunch but uh…my car's battery is flat. Could you maybe pick me up?"

Levi smirked. "If you want to come straight to my house, you can just say so, Eren."

"I don't! I mean, I do but that's not what I'm getting at!" Eren all but cried out. Levi chuckled, and Eren simply sighed. "Okay. Yeah, going straight to your place would be cool. But can we swing by my house and get some clothes?"

Levi gestured for Eren to follow him. Confused, Eren trailed behind Levi, wondering why the sudden silence. Instead of question it, Eren followed Levi obediently, and as soon as he was in Levi's car, alone with the man, his obedience was rewarded.

"You don't need clothes for what I am planning for this weekend," Levi said, matter-of-factly.

Eren swallowed thickly. "And…what's that?"

Drawing a deep breath, Levi started the car. As they slowly inched out of the parking lot, Levi spoke, his voice quiet and tone oddly grim. "Are you sure you want to do this with me?"

 _This._ That could only mean one thing. "The uhm…BDSM stuff?"

Levi nodded stiffly.

"I said I want to try it. I read up a bit about it and aside from the really hardcore stuff, it really doesn't seem that bad."

"I'm into some of that hardcore stuff," Levi mumbled, but Eren knew those words weren't for his ears to hear. "I would like to try something with you."

"Okay?"

Eren noticed that despite Levi's comment about clothing, they were still heading towards his house. It never ceased to amaze Eren, just how decent Levi could be if he really wanted to.

"I would like to try sensation play," Levi said.

"What's that?" Eren asked.

"It's…" Levi bit his lip, choosing his words carefully. While Eren appreciated the sentiment, he wished Levi would just be upfront with him. "It's a type of play that involved the administrating of various stimuli."

Eren wanted to roll his eyes. "English…I'm just a brat, you know."

Levi sighed. "It's being stimulated by different things, either a light touch to bring pleasure, or something harder to bring pain."

Eren had read about it before. He had read that with sensory deprivation, the removal or one or two of the primary senses enhanced the other senses, and that could be exploited to such lengths that something that would ordinarily never inflict pain, could be perceived as painful. So without actually inflicting pain, one could manipulate the body into releasing endorphins to combat pain. If done right, the high could be incredible.

"Oh," Eren said. "And…do you want to give me pleasure? Or…pain?"

The idea of Levi bringing him sweet, delectable pain was tantalizing. While Eren had never outright considered himself a masochist, he had some masochistic tendencies, and he was more than curious to have Levi exploit them all.

"It depends on what you are comfortable with, Eren," Levi said. "Honestly, I would like to do something light and slow, to give us both time to enjoy one another and to learn to trust one another in that setting."

Trust? Eren wondered why Levi would have to trust him. He understood why he as a submissive would have to be able to trust Levi, but…

"I need to trust that you will communicate with me," Levi said, as if reading Eren's mind. "While you need to trust that I won't hurt you or purposefully push your boundaries, I need to trust that you will enforce those boundaries and be alright to tell me to stop if you don't want more."

Looking up, Eren saw that they had come to stop outside his apartment complex. He opened the gate as he digested what Levi had said, finding himself somewhat impressed that Levi knew exactly where in the complex to go. Levi parked his car in the visitor's lot closest to Eren's apartment.

"I will wait here while you pack. Shower if you need to, else you can shower by me. Take your time. But…" Levi placed his hand on Eren's. "While you are up there, I want you to think carefully about what I may and may not do to you. When you come back, I will tell you exactly what implements I intend to use on you, and if you are uncomfortable with anything, it's out. Is that alright with you, Eren?"

Something about being addressed with such reverence had Eren's stomach flip on itself, in the most delightful way. The young brunette simply nodded, hand numb in Levi's as it was squeezed, almost as if to reassure. Without another word, Eren had left the car and was all but sprinting to his apartment, wondering if he should shower now or at Levi's.

Either way he chose, he knew he had to think. Today would be the day things would reach the next level, and that would not be possible unless he gave the green light.

* * *

 **Better, but still warming up. That was written on an empty and coffeeless stomach.**

 **Next up is going to be the main course.**

 **OS**


	34. Chapter 34: Take Flight

**A/N: I would like to thank everyone who followed and favorited this story; your ongoing support makes it worth it. And to those that review, I cannot thank you enough. Your reviews are like my aphrodisiac ;P To the regular reviewers, thank you for always sharing your thoughts, and to the guests, thank you for taking the time!**

 **Some good news: I have hit an inspiration ocean and have been writing like a madman the last week, so that means I have up to chapter 39 already written. Because of this, the next few updates are going to be fairly regular. :)**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

In the end, Eren did not shower at his own home. He opted to shower at Levi's, which suited the older man just fine. They had bought a light meal on their way to Levi's apartment, the trip being extended thus affording them the luxury of discussing what was to come. Levi explained his intentions in as much detail as he could without betraying the whole agenda – with the element of surprise gone, it would greatly detract from the experience. As he spoke, he paid special attention to Eren's reactions; the boy's words were positive and his tone was only slightly unsure, and while he seemed incredibly excited to try this, his body language showed that on some unconscious level, he was feeling uneasy.

It was understandable. This was a new experience. Levi knew he had to make it as perfect as possible; if this introduction failed, he could kiss the hopes of something more goodbye.

After having eaten, Eren made his way to the bathroom to shower.

"Rinse yourself off in the shower, then take a bath," Levi suggested. "I have bath salts that can soak and relax you."

"I'm not a princess, you know," Eren teased.

Levi rolled his eyes and set out the bath salts anyway. "Trust me. The more relaxed you are, the better this will be for you."

And so Eren obliged. This would give Levi some extra time in setting the scene, ensuring that by the time Eren comes out, everything would be absolutely perfect.

Levi started by lighting candles. Thick, red, unscented candles along with small, round white candles that gave off a pleasant vanilla scent as they burned decorated the room. Two red and one white per surface, spaced generously so that when the thick, black drapes were drawn, the room looked like it was enshrouded in the darkness of night, but sufficiently illuminated by the sensual lapping of a dozen tiny flames. It took but a few minutes for the room to be filled with the sweet, enticing scent of vanilla.

Next, Levi got his music ready. It had been months, possibly years since he had played with music, but then again, it had been equally as long since he'd done something this sensual. Longer yet since he'd wanted to _impress_ someone. It had to be perfect. Levi selected a long-neglected playlist, one guaranteed to set and keep the mood for both himself and his submissive. He put his phone onto Flight Mode before plugging it into the sound system, checking that the music was playing through the 10.2 system as well as the stereo headphones Eren would soon be wearing. Pleased with the setup, Levi allowed the soothing sounds of Bohren and Der Club of Gore to fill the room.

He took a moment to appreciate what he'd done so far. He smiled. So far, it was perfect. Now all he had to do was dress for the occasion and ready his implements, and he would be ready to host his precious sub. He could already feel his mindset shifting from Levi Ackerman to Eren's Dominant. The atmosphere – the calming darkness, the soft scent of vanilla and the dark jazzy tunes of Sunset Mission – created a perfect cocktail to bring absolute tranquility to him.

Levi dressed quickly. He seldom wore anything particularly special during plays. All he wanted from his attire was something that made him feel powerful, and enforced the dynamic between he and his submissive. Eren would be naked today, so it didn't quite matter what he wore…besides, this play did not touch on a great power exchange, so there was no need to bring out the full leather gear. Despite this, Levi still wanted to look nice for Eren; he wanted Eren to like what he would see, even if only for a few minutes. With all that in mind, Levi simply opted for black jeans, a light pair of boots and a studded, leather chest harness. That would leave him mostly clothed, with his torso open to Eren's marveling – and boy, did he know that Eren liked his torso.

 _Among_ _other things_ , Levi thought cockily.

The harness was a simple one, with straps over his shoulder, beneath his armpits, and a single strap traversing the length of his torso, with a bullring in the middle for any extra attachments should he so desire. Each strap was adjustable, and Levi tightened it to fit snugly across his muscular chest. Running his hands along his body, he knew he looked perfect; he could confidently present himself to his submissive now.

Now for the final preparations: his implements.

Levi prepared the red ropes that he would be binding Eren with. At first, he had no intention of binding the boy, but Eren had insisted he wanted to try it. Levi, all too happy to oblige, eagerly agreed. He thus was left with the task of inspecting every inch of each of the four short lengths of rope he would use to tie Eren, arms and legs spread, to the bed on which they would be playing. Just the thought of tying the brunette down was already exciting Levi; oh, how many times had he fantasized about these red ropes on the boy's smooth, tanned skin? He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply as he fingered the ropes, locating and marking the bight of each piece.

He then laid out his tools. Three Wartnenberg Pinwheels – a classic one, a seven-wheel pinwheel and a double-sided pinwheel – feathers of varying sizes and textures, three candles, each of varying heat intensities, a light leather-tasseled flogger, a large bowl of ice, and a small multi-speed bullet vibrator, one he'd never used before. Pleased with his neat arrangement, Levi smiled, and then finally laid out his last implement; stainless-steel claws that he would fit onto the fingers of one hand once Eren was secure.

Looking at the room he'd prepared for Eren, he likened this very much to a courtship; soft music, candles, and a quiet atmosphere promoting relaxation and comfort. It was as if this wading into one of the shallow pools of BDSM was designed to entice and ensnare his future submissive, lulling Eren into a state of security so the scene could become darker and increasingly more sinister with time. While there was no lie, no pretense in what he was offering today, Levi had told Eren that this was just the tip of the iceberg.

"Levi…"

The unsure voice of the brunette tore Levi from his marveling. When Levi turned to face Eren, he was met with a picturesque perfection that would have had him gawking had his trained mind not been so strictly forced into the state of being the perfect Dominant. Eren stood at the doorway, naked save for the towel secured loosely around his waist. The flickering of the candles did little to chase away the shadows dancing across his lean torso, enunciating the valleys between his muscles and making him appear stronger than he really was. His face, hidden by shadows, looked years younger as uncertainty danced with determination in his dazzling emerald eyes. The young man standing in the doorway was just _begging_ to be taken, to be owned. Levi would acquiesce to the call.

Extending his hand, Levi beckoned Eren in. The younger man walked forward, shutting the door behind him without needing to be told to do so. He came to stand before Levi, his posture rigid and stance betraying his nervousness.

"Shh," Levi said, fingers lightly brushing away wet strands of hair on the younger man's face. "Don't be so nervous."

"I'm trying," Eren whispered. His eyes darted around the room, and he froze when he saw the table of Levi's implements. Levi had mentioned them in the car, but this was the first time he'd seen a Wartenberg Pinwheel…aside from the research he'd done. "I'm fine, though."

Levi shook his head. "We're not doing anything until you are relaxed, and comfortable." Levi leaned into Eren and took a deep breath, inhaling the lingering scent of lavender from the bath salts he'd told Eren to use. "Did you enjoy your bath?"

"It was nice, yes," Eren said. He sounded somewhat dazed…just what Levi wanted.

"Come," Levi said, gently ushering Eren to a seat. "Sit down, and just breathe. Concentrate on the music, and feel my hands." Levi's nose was lightly pressed against the nape of Eren's neck. "If something is making you uncomfortable, what are you going to say?"

"Hmmm…" Eren responded, leaning his head forward to give Levi better access.

"No," Levi chided softly. "If I am doing something you don't want, and you want me to stop, what will you say, Eren? Answer me."

"Red," Eren whispered.

"Good." Levi caressed Eren's neck lightly, his fingertips brushing against the younger man's cheek. "And if you just want me to slow down?"

"Yellow," Eren answered immediately.

"Very good." Levi was pleased with the quick answer. He continued to caress Eren's soft skin gently, feeling light stubble under his fingertips as he traced his fingers lightly along Eren's chin. "This is all about you, Eren. Close your eyes and breathe in deeply…let the worries of the world melt away. Just focus on relaxing, focus on your pleasure."

The tension in Eren's posture quickly began to dissipate. Levi could feel it bleed off the younger man's skin, leaving his body like a defeated organism. Eren's head rolled this way and that, and eventually, the fingers that held onto the towel began to uncurl, one at a time, until the towel lay loosely pooled around his waist. Eren's breathing had begun to even out, and as Levi's fingers traced along the veins on Eren's neck, he could feel Eren's heartbeat begin to slow.

"Good…" Levi cooed, letting his fingers trail along Eren's shoulders, down his arms. Little goosebumps rose on Eren's skin at Levi's touch, causing the teen to shudder slightly, a quiet moan caught in the back of his throat. "Just relax…"

Levi took a step back then, eyes on his fingers as they traced patterns along the skin of Eren's back. He marveled at the texture of Eren's skin, at how it tautly wrapped around the bands of muscles adorning his back. The planes of Eren's back were smooth and defined, like the dunes of a desert at dusk. It was entrancing; the contrast between Levi's pale fingers and Eren's skin like that of a white lion traversing those dunes in desperate search of companionship.

"Eren, my I remove the towel?" Levi asked softly. Eren nodded once.

Levi was quick yet fluid in his movement, loosening the towel to bare the younger man before him. The sight was exquisite. Eren's legs were slightly spread, his cock not completely flaccid as it lay heavily against his leg. A single vein ran the length of Eren's shaft, caught in a limbo between arousal and nothingness. This was what Levi had ached to see.

"Come," he said, gently ushering Eren to the bed.

Eren followed eagerly, dazed, lost in a world far beyond this room. The brunette moved shakily, guided by Levi as he kept his eyes closed, trusting the older man to be his guide. Levi liked this, and was quick to situate Eren on the bed, laying him onto his back, arms and legs spread, before quickly getting to work lightly securing Eren's wrists and ankles to the bedposts in a light daisy chain.

 _Perfect,_ Levi thought.

"I'm going to put the blindfold on now," Levi quietly announced, before gently lifting Eren's head to secure the soft blindfold in place. "Are you okay?"

"Yes," Eren whispered.

As soon as the blindfold was secured, Levi noticed that Eren's semi arousal had bloomed, and that the younger man's fully erect cock now lay hungrily against his lower stomach. It looked heavy, full and aching, but Eren did not betray the want it urged him to. Instead, Eren lay dead still, completely at Levi's mercy. Had Levi not settled into his role as proficiently as he had, he would have yearned to touch it; to feel the warmth of Eren's heat in the palm of his hand would bring him joy, pleasure, but as he stood now, a Dominant to this perfect man bound to the bed, the only joy Levi sought was to bring Eren absolute euphoria.

"I'm going to put the headphones on now," Levi said. Eren nodded in acknowledgement. "If you want me to stop, you know what to say." Eren nodded again.

As soon as the headphones were secured, Eren let out a pleased moan. He smiled lazily before taking a deep breath, holding it for a second, and then releasing it, settling in against the bed.

Levi took a moment to admire his work. The red daisy chains on Eren's wrists and ankles looked better in reality than any fantasy could ever conjure up. Eren was spread, open, vulnerable, laying there exposed and for Levi's taking. The trust the brunette was showing was damn near intoxicating to Levi, and for a while, he made no move, simply just _looking_ at the flawless specimen before him. In this moment, Eren was his in every way he had ever desired, and today he was going to show Eren just how deeply he yearned to satisfy the boy.

* * *

Eren had never felt this level of tranquility in his life. The music reverberated in his ears, not loudly but with the potency to consume. With no sight and only the soft sound of the dark jazz infiltrating his senses, Eren was locked away in a world far beyond the one he knew. This new territory was dark, yet it was pleasant, like a meadow in the night. He imagined being alone in that meadow, the light breeze caressing his skin as the sound of the wind dancing with the grass overtook his senses. The smell of vanilla and Levi held him there, the tickle of something across his chest exacerbating the fantasy of the world he had been lured into.

He never wanted to leave.

That soft caress continued. Down his neck, his chest, his naval, causing his breathing to stutter as a ticklish sensation danced across his skin. He could feel his lips curling into a smile but he wouldn't know if he was expressing the elation he felt – his body was no longer under his control. He was left drifting in a primordial ocean, the meadow his everything but nothing all in the same breath.

Something touched his nipple then, jolting the meadow back into sharp focus. The image of a black wolf appeared to him, its predatory eyes focused on him as a jolt of pleasure tore through his body. The wolf nodded, ushering Eren further into tranquility, guiding him through the new world as he floated through the air. Another touch to his nipple, and Eren flew ever higher. This one was sharper, starker, so unlike the softness of the wind.

Trees hundreds of feet tall caressed his body as he ascended further yet; the prickle of a branch, the soft caress of a leaf, the quiet whisper of the wind becoming louder as he flew higher and higher into the never ending night sky. The wolf watched from below, bidding Eren farewell and blessing him on his journey through the beautiful abyss. A sharp trail ran from his shoulder to his wrist, and then back. Then the other arm. His tactile senses were abuzz, and Eren could feel the desire to have the rest of his body touched waking as the caress served to both tantalize and tease.

Again. And again. That sharp trail became sharper, pricking until it almost hurt. How could pain be so delectable? How could being so out of control be so damn sweet? Eren stilled as he allowed the gentle assault to ravage his body, tensing some as the prickling traveled from his arms, down his sides, curving in along his V-lines until it almost, _almost_ touched the sweet part of his body he had nearly forgotten about. Though, with the promise of touch barely an inch away from the part that ached for it, Eren suddenly became blissfully aware of the heavy arousal he bore.

Yet he was denied. The sensations parted then, neglecting him, and instead blazing a trail down his legs. He could feel his muscles thrumming; the touch was eliciting vibrations from the deepest part of his core, causing his skin to crawl in the most pleasant way. Down, further yet, the trail was made, forging pathways on his skin that had never been traversed before. He could feel a moan at the back of his throat, but he would never know if it ever passed his lips.

Then suddenly, just as quickly as he'd taken flight, he was falling. He tumbled through the never ending sky, plummeting towards the earth as it opened up its gaping maw, filled with lava, hungry and waiting to devour him. He wanted to scream, he wanted to trill in delight, but he was powerless as the heat of the core of the earth consumed his body. It rained down on him, pouring upon his skin until he was drowning in it. The heat was violating, violent and damn near incapacitating, but the pain that it roused was the sweetest delight Eren had ever had the privilege of experiencing. He squirmed, caught between trying to escape the sweet torture and seeking more of it, but as soon as he'd moved, the rain stopped.

A whimper came from the deepest part of him, and suddenly, the wolf was there again. It eyed him curiously, wondering. Eren nodded at it, telling his guide that he wanted more of this journey, that it was far from over. The wolf nodded back in understanding before turning tail and running off, it's motions slow until it eventually evaporated before Eren's very eyes.

 _Don't go…_

The soft caress of the meadow breeze returned. The lava solidified beneath him, creating a hard bed that was oddly pleasant against his back. Here he lay, motionless, defeated by the pleasure of his own world, allowing whatever power that be to have complete control over him. Sighing blissfully, Eren felt as though he had shed his skin. He watched as it burnt like paper, burning embers being blown away like ash as he was reborn. Once raw, Eren felt as exposed as he was the day he was born, and suddenly, that soft meadow breeze felt like a glacial blizzard against his skin.

He hissed harshly, tensing as the meadow was suddenly thrust into wintertime. The wind whipped around him as the cold assaulted every exposed part of his body, encapsulating him in an icy coffin that wrapped tightly around his torso and pinned his arms and legs to the cold, hard earth. This pain was intense; it was almost unbearable, but Eren reveled in it. The wolf, now white, howled with the wind, strengthening Eren's resolve as its haunting voice said to Eren, "I will protect you."

 _Protect me…_

However, instead of protection, the last of Eren's sanity was violently wrenched from him as he felt the touch he craved. He could feel his body jolt, and suddenly the blizzard died down as pleasure as hot as the sun tore through his very core. Crying out – in pain, pleasure, wanting it to stop but so desperately _needing more_ – Eren's body contorted as the heat seemed to grow impossibly. Was it okay to feel this hot? Eren wondered if he would self-combust, but his instinct to survive was retarded by his quest for pleasure.

 _More, more…yes…more!_

His body was numb, but it had never felt more alive. Lost in time, Eren felt now as though he were tearing through a wormhole as the universe started collapsing all around him. It was loud, it was frightening, but there was nowhere he would rather be. The wolf, now grey, ran ahead of him, beckoning him to follow, enticing him into the chase. The wolf promised more of that warmth; _come with me_ , its cries said.

Eren could not resist.

He fell through space, he fell through time, uncaring of the world being destroyed as he chased the fever that had him sweating and trembling, his entire body under the command of an otherworldly entity. Eren flew, chasing his guide until it eventually erupted into a brilliant white display of fireworks. He balked, stopping dead in his tracks as the white-hot embers of a supernova flew by him, blinding him and searing his skin. They touched him, penetrating through the dermal layers that made him a mortal, and as each tiny ember sank into his skin, it exacerbated the violent heat that had Eren prisoner to his own body.

Suddenly, he was falling. Only this time, there was nothing beneath him. Falling through nothingness, Eren felt the heat leaving his body as unadulterated euphoria filled him from the very deepest part of his core. As he fell, the numbness yielded to delight, and eventually, the delight yielded to wholeness, to fullness, and where there was once a searing heat that damn near had him claw his skin off, a gentle warmth had taken its place.

His body shuddered as his fall decelerated. With no end in sight, Eren simply breathed evenly, trusting this place to bring him no harm. Slower and slower he fell, until eventually he was once again floating in the meadow he had first found.

The wolf was waiting for him there. Black again, it sat patiently and watched as Eren hovered a few feet above the ground, waiting patiently until Eren's body eventually came to lay on the soft grass. It yipped and nodded, eyes proud, posture that of a mother who had seen her young hunt successfully for the first time.

The grass caressed Eren's skin. It was softer than ever, more inviting, yet despite this, the meadow began to fade.

 _No…don't go…_ Eren pleaded, but the proud wolf stood. It stood and watched Eren disappear; it took the young man a moment to realize that this time it wasn't the wolf disintegrating, but rather himself. _No!_

In a blinding move, the wolf launched itself at Eren, just as Eren's body began to fully disappear. It came to stand directly over him, grey eyes intense as they bore into Eren's. Why were those eyes so familiar? Despite being taken out of existence, Eren felt an odd calm come over him; those eyes were eyes he could trust, and they bore intensely into his own as if saying, "Go now, my child."

And then there was nothing.

The meadow was gone, the wolf, the caress. Everything that had been so carefully crafted – his perfect little world – no longer existed. The only thing Eren could see and feel was a monstrous abyss, so unlike the sweet one he had just been in. Suddenly, he felt frightened and alone, yet as he tried to curl in on himself, he felt he could not move. Eren whimpered, trying again, but his body was numb.

 _No, I don't want this…I want to go back!_

"Eren…" a soft voice called out to him, and suddenly he was grounded. Suddenly, the nothingness yielded to a gentle touch, barely perceptible at first but growing. "Shhh…"

 _Yes…_

Finally, he could curl up. The touch became warmer until it enveloped him completely, and Eren desperately sought the warmth of this entity as quiet words of reassurance were whispered in a voice he vaguely recognized. A light touch to his shoulder, fingers running through his hair. Lips moving against his ears, kisses being peppered down his neck. It all felt so right, so homely, and soon, the abyss began to fade away.

Still met with darkness, Eren whined, and none too soon, the darkness was no more. He was met with the scent of vanilla and something else…he could not quite place it, but it smelt like home. Like safety. Like it belonged right here with him. Slowly, those words of reassurance faded to the back of his mind, and it was then that Eren heard the soft music dancing with the quiet sounds of rain and thunder.

"You're safe here, precious, do not fear. I've got you. I will keep you safe. I will protect you. Shh, rest now. Rest, my sweet Eren. Do not fear…"

 _Levi…_

Eren curled further into the warmth of the man uttering the sweet reassurances, fully submitting to his protector, his body begging for protection. Levi's arms tightened around Eren's body as if to wordlessly reiterate his role. No harm would come to Eren as long as Levi was nearby, and Eren knew this.

And so Eren lay, in Levi's arms, as he slowly began to piece together the world around him, oh so different from the dream he had just had.

* * *

 **We finally got there :D Thank you for reading! Please leave a review with your thoughts.**

 **For those who may be uncertain, what transpired is sensation play. It is usually very sensual, and intimate, and accounts from subs do say that the places one can reach emotionally, psychologically, is indescribable.**

 **There will definitely be more to come. Thank you once again for the read.**

 **OS**


	35. Chapter 35: You're Safe

**A/N: Good day, beautiful people. Thank you for sticking around, for the favorites, follows and reviews! On a note, I have resigned and will be sort of unemployed again end of April, hopefully giving me more time to write. From there, there will be a slightly busy period and almost the rest of the year is smooth sailing. I will focus on this and be putting out some other fics, for those who may be interested.**

 **Hope you enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Snk, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

Levi let Eren guide him.

Every twitch of a muscle, every moan, every whimper, each time his jaw clenched, toes curled or fingers formed fists, Levi responded. Levi did only what Eren's body asked of him, watching attentively and noting every shaky breath, every twitch of the man's heavy arousal, every stutter of those fine hips. However just as Levi watched for signs of pleasure, he watched more attentively for signs of discomfort. But none came.

Eren was chasing a high Levi knew the boy had never experienced before. And oh, to be the first one to administer it was a high of its own. It was damn near intoxicating to watch Eren's body writhe as they boy's orgasm neared. While Levi had no intention of chasing it, he knew, and had told Eren, that it was a possibility. Now that that possibility was becoming a reality, Levi could not deny his sweet submissive. Eren had given him the permission, had said, "If I am close, please let me cum." Even now, as Eren's body begged for release, Eren's lips formed a sacred prayer, begging for more, begging for pleasure, begging, begging.

Levi brought the man to orgasm with barely a touch. He watched as Eren's body convulsed, as his hips stuttered and thrust forward with each jolt of his cock as his release shot from him. Jet after impressive jet of thick, white cum shot from Eren's aching cock, coating his stomach, the bed, and even shooting up as far as his own face. Watching this had Levi's own arousal tingle, but he paid absolutely no mind to it; Eren Yeager was his number one and _only_ priority right now, and he would focus on nothing else until such time that Eren's high had been ridden out thoroughly.

The problem with a high this great, was the fall. This bigger the high, the greater the fall, the more violent the waking.

Levi had hoped to take Eren to great heights, but he had never imagined – hoped and fantasized, yes, but never truly thought it possible – that Eren would respond _this_ well to his ministrations. He never would have thought that he could take Eren so far their first time. He never could have guessed it possible that Eren would become so lost, so quickly.

But now he was falling, and he was falling hard.

It started with the whimpers. It may have been the first time Levi had played with Eren, but he could quickly discern that these weren't whimpers of delight or pleasured desperation; these whimpers were those of fear. Seconds later, Eren began to fight against the confines. He tugged at the ropes on his wrists and ankles, and the moment he found he was stuck, those whimpers became louder, more desperate.

Levi was quick to jump into action, loosening one wrist and then the other within seconds. As soon as his wrists were free, Eren curled in on himself, holding his torso. The struggle to free his ankles only strengthened.

 _Shit…_ Levi thought, as he realized he would not be able to release Eren's ankle binds quick enough. Grabbing his knife, he deftly cut the rope, and as soon as Eren was free, he curled up in a little ball on the bed.

It was cause for concern, but not alarm. Levi quickly positioned himself by Eren's side, lying beside the younger man and using his whole body to wrap Eren up in a protective cocoon. His fingers began to gently caress all he could reach, a light, soothing touch across Eren's heated, clammy skin. The boy began to relax, barely, but the tension was snapping one tiny coil at a time.

Words of reassurance came from Levi's lips before he had removed the headphones, and as soon as Eren's whimpering ceased, Levi freed his sense of hearing. Eren froze at this, but Levi continued with his utterances, fingers and lips ghosting across Eren's skin as his strong arms locked around the younger man's body.

When they had spoken about the play, Levi had told Eren this was a possibility. He had warned Eren that the deeper he lost himself in the play, the worse it would be to come back to reality. Only when he had said it, Levi did not think it would be to this great an extend…however, he was fully prepared for it.

Reaching over behind him, Levi took the warm, damp cloth and began to clean Eren's release where he could reach. Eren responded positively to the warmth of the cloth and allowed Levi most of the access needed to clean at least his face and chest. The rest would have to wait. It took some time, but eventually Eren was some semblance of calm. Levi then dared to remove the final barrier between this world and Eren's, and quietly told Eren he was going to remove the blindfold a minute before he actually did it.

When he did, Eren whimpered and curled himself further into Levi's chest. Levi had seen this many times before, but he had never been on the receiving end of the disorientation and fear of being wrenched into a world in which one does not want to be. His soft assurances continued, his arms locking tighter around Eren's body and fingers and lips trailing across tanned skin.

"You're safe here, precious, do not fear. I've got you. I will keep you safe. I will protect you. Shh, rest now. Rest, my sweet Eren. Do not fear. I'm right here. You are not alone. I am here for you. I am here with you. You're safe, Eren."

An immeasurable amount of time passed. The second Bohren and Der Club of Gore playlist was nearing its end, but the two men lay still. Most of the candles had long since burnt out, leaving the room shrouded in darkness, yet neither flinched. Levi would lay by Eren's side until Eren was ready to move, and if that meant they would be sleeping here, then so be it.

As they lay there, Levi reminisced on their play. It couldn't have gone better. Eren had been receptive to him from the moment he'd entered the room, and from the moment Levi's ministrations first began, Eren was lost. It was delectable to see that beautiful body squirm under his touch, intoxicating to know Eren's mind was being taken to places previously undiscovered. Selfishly, Levi loved everything that had happened and wouldn't change a damn thing, even the rocky ending, because all of it came down to one very important fact – Levi and Eren had an incredible dynamic.

Despite the violent fall, Levi could catch Eren. It would be useless to be able to take Eren to highs and not be able to deal with the lows. Levi would not be able to say he was a good dominant if he could not handle his submissive in _all_ aspects. Being exposed to this, so early on, eased some of Levi's own worries about being good for the brunette.

Eventually, though, Eren did stir. He groaned sleepily before wriggling in Levi's embrace; Levi did not let up until Eren let out another groan, pushing at Levi's chest weakly.

"Do you want to get up?" Levi whispered.

"I need to pee," Eren said groggily. Levi had guessed that Eren had fallen asleep some time ago.

"Are you alright to get up or do you need help?" Levi asked.

"I think I can get to the bathroom on my own, mom," Eren said.

 _And he's back_ , Levi thought with a smile as he rolled away from Eren.

He watched as Eren left the room, and as soon as he was alone, Levi let out a long sigh. _What a damn perfect way to spend a Saturday_ , he thought, a smile touching his lips. He closed his eyes and took a moment to relive the delight of watching Eren come undone at his touch, before he slowly started fingering at the straps of his harness to remove it.

"Were you wearing that the whole time?" Eren asked.

Levi opened an eye and found Eren standing beside the bed, his expression somewhere between awed and embarrassed as he watched Levi removed the harness.

"Yes," Levi answered. He shook himself free of the harness before sitting up on the bed, glancing up at Eren. "How do you feel?"

Eren smiled shyly as he came to sit beside Levi, resting his head on the older man's shoulder. "I don't know."

"Is that a good thing?" Levi asked, nuzzling Eren's hair and taking a deep breath, inhaling the scent of his own shampoo on the boy. "Or a bad thing?"

"A good thing," Eren answered. "That was…fucking intense."

"I told you it would be."

Eren leaned away from Levi then, looking down at his fingers that were intertwined with one another. He chewed on his lower lip, searching for words, and Levi granted him the time to formulate his sentence. As much as he wanted to hear what was on his brat's mind, he needed Eren to try and figure this out for himself. Eventually, Eren lifted his eyes, determination clear in them.

"Did I cum?" Eren asked.

At first, Levi wanted to laugh. Was that all Eren was mulling about asking? However, instead, Levi just nodded, knowing that there was a very real possibility that Eren wanted to ask or say something else, and opted to ask something easier instead.

"Like a fucking fire truck," Levi added.

Even in the dark of the room, Eren's blush was vivid. "I saw there was some uhm…cum on my stomach and stuff…"

"I did try to clean you up," Levi said, "but you were a little inaccessible in your position."

"My position?"

"You don't remember?"

Eren thought for a moment. His eyes danced around the room, and he looked at each one of the sets of candles, noting that the white candle from each had burnt out. Most of the red candles seemed to have served half their lifespans. Eyes still roaming the room, the brunette noted the implements Levi had showed him earlier were all still impeccably placed, as if they were never used. The ice had melted completely, though. Eren saw the white spots of his cum against the black bedding and his blush deepened.

"I uh…" Eren eventually tried. He cleared his throat. "I remember feeling incredibly good. I have never felt so amazing in my life."

"That's good."

"But then I started feeling real empty and scared. I didn't want that amazing feeling to end."

A small smile touched Levi's lips as he reached forward to caress Eren's cheek. "No one ever does, Eren, and that's perfectly normal. That's what I am here for; to catch you. Coming down from that high will get easier with time."

"Really?" Eren sounded scared. "I don't want to feel like that again."

Hearing that made Levi's heart clench. Despite every good thing he'd made Eren feel, the boy had also gone through a very unpleasant drop, and for that, Levi felt responsible. He wracked his mind wondering how he could've done it better; could he have noticed sooner that Eren was falling? Should he have cut all the ropes instead of untying the wrists first? Should he…

"It's not your fault, Levi," Eren suddenly said. Levi's eyes met Eren's again, and he saw nothing but concern in those dark greens. "You made it okay. As soon as you held me, I felt better."

"I don't want you to have that again," Levi whispered.

Eren smiled a goofy, boyish smile and said, "Shit happens. But overall, it really was incredible. I never knew it was possible to feel so…consumed."

That was what Levi wanted to hear. That is what he, as a Dominant, lived for. He wanted nothing more than to please and satisfy his sub, and to hear Eren speak like that truly made him happy. "So I didn't scare you off?"

"Nah," Eren said. "It'll take more than that to scare me. Besides…if this is what our first time was like, imagine how it will be when we're…you know…closer."

So it wasn't just Levi who had had that thought. "It'll only get better."

Eren smiled and leaned towards Levi, pausing for a moment as if asking permission. Levi said nothing, and made no move to advance or retreat, curious as to what the younger man's intentions were. However, being this close to Eren was bringing to life the previously snuffed out embers of his arousal.

Oh, it had been too long since a play had aroused him. For as long as he could remember, years, in fact, he had played with women. He could tease and tantalize and even sexually satisfy them with his ministrations without so much as touching them – he would not dare, and cringed at the mere thought – but those sessions never aroused him. They enticed his mind, dare he say aroused him psychologically, but that was it. He was excited at the prospect of being able to do that to another person. With Eren, he had become sexually excited at seeing the object of his lusting satisfied by his ministrations. He thought he had dealt with it perfectly fine at the time by ignoring it, but now it was impossible to ignore.

"Did it turn you on?" Eren whispered.

"Yes," Levi said without missing a beat.

"Did you cum?"

"No, Eren. This was about you."

Eren smiled a shy, lopsided smile before giving Levi a chaste kiss on the cheek. Only, he did not retreat, his lips moving towards Levi's ear to whisper, "Can I please make you cum…sir?"

 _Say no more_ , Levi wanted to growl out. Instead, he smirked and raised a brow. "I would like to tidy up here and get clean…" He ran his eyes along the length of Eren's body, noting that the younger man's _other_ length had already roused from its flaccid state. _Insatiable brat,_ Levi thought. "So why don't you go and run us a nice bath while I tidy up, and then we can soak together."

"Bath sex isn't all that glamorous, you know," Eren said.

Levi rolled his eyes. "I never said I'm going to fuck you, Eren."

A devious smile came to the brunette's lips. "Your intentions aren't the only ones we need to consider, you know."

"Horny brat," Levi chastised, abruptly standing and turning away from Eren despite knowing his semi wouldn't be visible in the dark light. "Go run a bath."

"Yes sir," Eren said teasingly, before all but waltzing out of the room.

Once alone, Levi palmed at his semi erect cock, shifting it to a more comfortable position in his pants as he thought that Eren Yeager would be the death of him.

* * *

Not only is bath sex not glamorous; bath _anything_ is not glamorous.

When Levi came into the bathroom, he was not flaccid. Had Eren not seen Levi flaccid before, he may have thought that the man was simply particularly well endowed, but he knew better than that. Levi's cock jutted out a little more as it hung, longer than usual, and looking heavy as the growing veins fed the growing beast. Seeing it had Eren lick his lips; knowing it was because of him that the older man was turned on had Eren's own length throb beneath the water and luscious cascade of bubbles.

He stroked his own length as Levi slipped into the spacious tub, eyes trained on Eren. It was obvious what he was doing, but Levi said nothing of it. He simply watched as Eren masturbated before him.

Being watched in this manner was a violent turn on for Eren. Those predatory eyes focused on his own, drinking in his every movement and all but _daring_ him to push harder, go further, to cum again. Eren felt as bound by Levi's gaze as he did by the ropes that had bound his wrists and ankles, and in this moment, there was nothing he would change. He loved being trapped by the man, locked in his lair and spun tightly into his web as he sought his own carnal pleasure.

And Levi seemed absolutely enamored by it.

Eren could only imagine Levi's length had hardened. Hidden beneath the surface of the water, Eren could do nothing but fantasize about what was happening to the older man. But if the darkening expression on his face and the increasing hunger in his eyes were anything to go about, Eren was willing to bet that Levi was erect. Eren imagined Levi's length heavily resting against his thigh, the head slightly exposed as the foreskin pulled back, unable to further contain the bulbous glans. The thought alone had Eren hungry for more, yearning to touch and to feel that pulsating heat in his own hands.

"Come here," Eren whispered.

Wordlessly, Levi obliged. He moved closer to Eren, but closer wasn't close enough. Eren scooted closer yet, moving until his chest was mere inches from Levi's. He wrapped his legs around Levi's waist, while the older man let his legs stay loosely at Eren's side. They were so close that the current of the water moving around them had Levi's cock brush against Eren's hand.

With his eyes on Levi, Eren took Levi's length into his hand. Would he ever get used to how heavy and hot it felt? Would he every get used to the fact that, despite his own hands being somewhat large, his thumb just barely touched his fingers when he wrapped them around Levi's impressive girth?

The intensity of Levi's glare faltered at Eren's touch, and Levi let out a long breath as Eren's hand began gliding along his length.

There was no teasing and no slow build up. They were two men seeking one thing: release. In a matter of seconds, Eren's hands found a quick, sharp rhythm on both his and Levi's cocks, grip loose and hands twisting at each touch of their heads. Despite the water sloshing about and spilling from the edges of the bathtub and onto the floor, both men were too lost chasing their highs to care. Eventually, Levi had his head thrown back and was moaning quietly as Eren stroked him, the twisting of fingers around his head at each stroke almost too much to bear. Eren simply watched, dazed and ravenous, as Levi threatened to come undone at his touch.

It didn't take particularly long. Levi was too highly strung and Eren too turned on by being able to make such a steadfast, pristine man a moaning mess.

Levi came first.

With a barely audible gasp and, dare Eren say, a _desperate_ moan, Levi pinched his eyes shut and clenched his jaw as a thousand volts tore through his body. Eren watched, entranced, as silent profanities fell from Levi's lips, hips stuttering instinctively as his cock lurched, spilling his release.

It was enough to push Eren over the edge. He whispered Levi's name as he came, the weight of pleasure pulling him under and threatening to drown him as he sat in this very tub. He could feel his abdominal muscles clenching painfully tight as the pressure further below reached critical point, and he snapped. Again, and again, he could feel that delightful pressure rise and fall, and rise and fall as he shot his essence to be lost in the water around him.

When he came down from the momentary high, so delightful but paling in comparison to the heights Levi had taken him, Eren found Levi staring at him again.

"What?" Eren asked, smiling shyly. His skin felt hot, and he could feel his cheeks flush.

Levi smirked. "I'm beginning to wonder if I'm ever going to take you on that date."

* * *

 **Thank you for reading. I'm looking forward to your thoughts!**

 **OS**


	36. Chapter 36: Chasing Ghosts

**A/N: Thank you so much for the reviews! Zen4365, I'm glad you enjoyed the sensory dep! I agonized for a long time to get the scene just right.**

 **This chapter is going to take on a little Jean once again. Thank you to all my readers for still sticking around. Hopefully in the next month or so I will be able to post a lot more regularly.**

 **Enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

"Oh my god! What happened to your face?"

Jean groaned. He did not think the inflammation around his eye and the swelling of his lip looked particularly bad, but his ego was definitely bruised. As a matter of fact, if his ego were visible to the naked eye, he was sure Marco would be rushing him to the ER right this second instead of standing in the kitchen, eyes wide and waiting for an explanation for the bruising like a mother would.

It couldn't be unexpected of him to be bruised up, now and then; he did partake in MMA, after all.

"Nothin'," Jean said, a few seconds too late.

He meandered to the fridge and opened it in the hopes that food had materialized overnight. When he was greeted with nothing but a small bowl of cooked rice, three raw eggs and an impressive array of condiments – definitely not the kind of variety a person would expect of two bachelors living together – he closed the fridge with a sigh. The last thing he wanted was to be that person going through a drive thru alone on a Sunday to pick up lunch.

"Your competition is coming up," Marco said. When Jean turned around, he found Marco had busied himself by putting things on their place on the countertop. "You should take it a little easier."

Jean smiled a half-hearted smile. Marco had an odd way of expressing his concern, but as always, never pushed.

"I know," Jean said. "I never thought Eren would go off at me the way he did."

Marco's hands stilled over a pile of envelopes. His eyes slowly lifted to meet Jean's, and Jean could see the question in them, the question Marco would not vocalize.

"Yep," Jean said, shrugging. "Eren did this. Got me on the floor too."

"That's uh…" Marco struggled for words, but Jean knew what he wanted to say.

It was no secret that Eren had always been the weaker fighter between the two of them. Not only because Jean had more experience, but because Jean was more logical and less emotional, and he often used Eren's inability to remain calm and focused when provoked to his advantage.

"Well…" Jean stretched, putting his bare torso on display. Marco averted his eyes as if he were a gentleman that had accidentally walked in on a maiden bathing. "He's gonna give me a run for my money at the comp, that's for sure."

When their eyes met again, Jean noticed Marco had a hard time holding his gaze. But before he could question it, Marco asked, "Because he got the upper hand once?"

The brunette snorted. "He is the definition of the upper hand. He's being trained by Levi fucking Ackerman. One on one. How can anyone compete with that?"

"You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink," Marco said with a smile.

"That horse is thirsty as hell," Jean said, leaning forward against the counter. His face was mere inches from Marco's as his eyes narrowed. "And he's drinking, alright."

Marco, though wanting to back away, held Jean's gaze, though not as boldly as he would have hoped. "It's not like you to be so resigned."

"Just realistic."

With that, Jean backed away. He turned his back to Marco and looked out of the kitchen window, noting, not for the first time, that there wasn't much of a view to enjoy. Their kitchen overlooked a parking area in their complex. It may not have been breathtaking, but it was home.

"You know…" Jean started, not turning around. "I spoke to Eren."

"And?"

"He pretty much told me to go fuck myself."

Jean could hear Marco wince behind him. He did not want to turn around; he was afraid of the pity he would see. Despite the fact that he knew Marco did not pity him, and was merely an empathetic person showing concern for their friend, he hated the look nonetheless. It made him feel weak and belittled.

"I think there's someone else, actually," Jean whispered.

"What makes you think that?"

Turning around, Jean's eyes met with Marco's – they were frightened and unsure. "I don't really know I just…it's a feeling."

Shaking his head, a small, sad smile touched Marco's lips. "Whether or not there's someone else, you can be at peace. At least you know you did what you could to try and get him back."

"Did I really? I don't feel like I did much."

"Talking to him is one hell of a step from toying around with him and hurting him time and again," Marco retorted.

He may have been a quiet and reserved person, but Jean could not forget that Marco did intend on building a career as a lawyer. While never cynical and tyrannical, Marco was never afraid to state facts and did so with frightening efficiency, thanks in part to his incredible ability to store and recall information in vivid detail.

Sighing, Marco then said, "I know you love him and want him back. But remember, a lot of the pain you were feeling was guilt from how you were treating him, and the uncertainty of if you would ever get a chance with him again."

"You reckon?"

Marco smiled. "I know you, dude. And you've been drunk, bawling your eyes out here," Marco pointed at the couch in the living room, "more times than I care to count. I think I have a pretty good idea of what's going on in that head of yours."

Jean's shoulders shook as he laughed soundlessly. "You always know what to say, you know? You're a real good friend, Marco. I'm glad I have you."

"Any time." Marco walked around the counter and into the kitchen. "So! What am I making for lunch? You look hungry."

"A good friend, and a perfect wife," Jean teased, causing Marco to blush. "Should I propose to you now or later?"

"Jean, don't joke around like that!" Marco stuttered.

Laughing, Jean punched Marco lightly on the shoulder. "As if. If there's anyone getting a wife here, it's you."

The black-haired male simply laughed before ducking into the kitchen cupboards in search of potential ingredients. While he was rummaging around there, Jean took it upon himself to search through the freezer in the hope that there was some meat they could make. True to Marco's exceptional housekeeping capabilities, Jean soon produced a packet of frozen chicken breasts.

"Something with chicken?" Jean suggested.

"I'll make a curry," Marco said.

Marco quickly busied himself with the preparations. While Jean put the chicken in the microwave to defrost, Marco began slicing onions and soon had them in a pan with oil and garlic, sizzling on a medium heat. Jean watched, somewhat mesmerized, as the oil bubbled around the onions. He tried to remember if Eren had ever cooked for him but for some reason, he just couldn't seem to find a memory like that.

 _Huh, strange…_

"I'm so sick of case studies," Marco announced as he began peeling potatoes.

"Oh?" Jean prompted.

"Some of them are actually interesting. Then you get ones that are just…like this woman who became the owner of a sheep farm from her husband after he passed, since both their sons were too young to claim the inheritance. But this woman figured she could get some extra income if she didn't just sell wool…but steel wool as well."

"Steel wool?" Jean questioned.

Marco pointed the knife at the scourer lying by the sink. "The goldilocks," he said with a smile. He turned his attention back to the task at hand. "Anyway, she figured that if sheep give wool, they can give steel wool too…"

Jean's lips twitched in amusement, partly because of Marco's passionate ire and partly because he had an idea of where this was going.

"She fed the sheep steel pellets or something," Marco said. He grabbed the next potato and began peeling it. "Needless to say, the sheep died."

"All of them?"

"Enough to put the family into financial ruin, that's for sure," Marco said. He quickly finished peeling the potato before grabbing a third. "Needless to say, she ended up in court."

"Geez," Jean said, smiling and shaking his head. "People are dumb, huh?"

"Jean, my friend," Marco said, pausing with three massive peeled potatoes under his hands, "I want to cry when I think about the caliber of people I am forced to share oxygen with.

The brunette erupted into a raucous fit of laughter, holding his stomach and pinching his eyes shut as he doubled over. He was oblivious to Marco's incredulous glare, too lost in the precious moment of such harsh words coming from the mouth of a man Jean would name a saint.

"One of them in my very house," Marco muttered.

Jean's laughter immediately ceased. His eyes snapped up to Marco, partly offended and partly just shocked at what he'd heard. Marco smiled innocently and winked at Jean before turning his attention back to the potatoes, which he promptly began chopping up.

"You're a work of art, you know?" Jean said, shaking his head.

"Lawyer in the making," Marco sassed. "Be useful and check if the chicken has defrosted yet, will ya?"

* * *

By the time Monday afternoon rolled around, Jean was pleased that most of the swelling had gone down. What he was not looking forward to was the inevitable gloating expression his ex would have at the mere sight of the damages done. It took every ounce of Jean's willpower for him to haul himself to the dojo, and had it not been for the fact that the competition was in only five days, he would've happily skipped today.

All his worrying was for naught, though. Eren wasn't even there. Jean found it strange, with the competition so close, but tried to force himself not to think about it. Instead, he focused on his own training, paired up with Annie as they practiced defense techniques with focus pads and only wraps on his knuckles. At first, it went great. Annie came at him with devastating speed and precision, and even though he knew she was not hitting anywhere near full capacity, the fear of being struck by a woman as lethal as Annie had Jean on his toes with the focus pads. She commended him several times as he blocked her attacks, and helped him with less predictable combinations when he was the one doing the attacking.

For about forty minutes, everything was going just peachy, until a certain duo caught Jean's eye.

He noticed from the corner of his eye that Eren had arrived, but he also noticed that Eren wasn't wearing training gear. That was also when he realized that Levi was wearing a shoulder brace.

"Focus, Jean!" Annie growled out as she threw her body into a right hook that Jean just caught.

"Whoa, hang on!" Jean pleaded. Annie paused her next assault and eyed him impatiently. "I just need a couple minutes."

She sighed and nodded, before turning her attention to a nearby punching bag.

Jean watched Eren walk away. It was completely uneventful, until Levi followed, several seconds behind. It wouldn't have seemed particularly suspicious except for the fact that it was Mr. Antisocial-Fuck-The-World, world-class sportsman following a Novice Nobody, after becoming said Novice Nobody's personal coach after _explicitly_ stating in numerous articles and interviews that he would _never_ train a person personally. Added to that Eren's sudden change of heart, and Jean's nagging suspicion that there was somebody else…

 _No, it can't be_ , Jean said. He stopped at the dojo door and watched as the two men he had planned on stalking disappeared down the stairs to the underground parking lot. _Stop chasing ghosts._

The brunette was about to turn back to the dojo to continue his session when he caught sight of Annie. She'd already moved on to a new partner, moving fluidly with the older, more experienced man. In fact, it look like he was giving her a few tips.

Jean looked back at the parking lot. Something didn't sit right with him. From day one he'd wondered how Eren had procured Levi as a coach, despite what the man had said. Eren had been very dismissive, _secretive_ almost, about the entire thing. Thinking about it, Jean realized that that was very unlike Eren. Eren was a loud-mouthed, pompous boaster, and if he had managed to snag Levi as a personal trainer, he would undoubtedly have flaunted it to the world. Yet Eren had said nothing. If Jean had not seen it with his own eyes, would he have even known?

Eren was hiding something, and that something had to do with Levi.

"You're being paranoid," Jean scolded himself, but that did not stop him from taking off in the direction of the parking lot.

Once down there, Jean snuck between cars, keeping a low profile as he attempted to locate the duo. Chances are they, or one of them, had already left. He had taken his sweet time in deciding to come on this wild goose chase.

Then he heard it; laughter. Not just any laughter, the familiar, bittersweet symphony of Eren's laughter. He almost smiled when he heard it, but then he remembered how Eren had told him off.

Jean quietly followed the sound, heart beginning to pound faster in his chest. What was he hoping to uncover? Of course nothing would be seen or heard, but _what if_ …

If there was something going on, how would he handle it? Was Levi even gay? Jean racked his mind for an article, an indication, but he had never seen it mentioned or seen the sportsman with another man. Whatever twisted delusion Jean had in his mind could not be true…so then why was he still inching forward as if he needed proof of what his rational mind had already decided?

"…tests this week." Eren sounded upset.

"Your competition is on Saturday." Levi.

Jean swallowed thickly. He should not be doing this. If he were to get caught…

"I promise I'll try my best to come every day," Eren said. "I should be able to come at least Wednesday and Thursday."

 _No, I have to go_.

Losing his will to continue his eavesdropping, Jean snuck away from Eren and Levi the same way he'd come. Though as he retreated, he heard something, and he was not sure if his mind had conjured it up or if the man's real words had become twisted in the rush of blood through Jean's ears, but he swore he heard Levi's voice echo in the night.

 _If you're not here, then at least come to my place._

* * *

The words he thought he'd heard Levi utter in the silence when the man thought he was alone with Eren had plagued Jean's mind. Surely it was nothing but a trick of his senses; with adrenaline pumping through his veins and his paranoia and suspicions reaching fever pitch, it was not impossible to have imagined the entire conversation. However, Jean had never been delusional – at least that's what he thought – so what were the chances of his mind conjuring up something so wildly improbable?

Firstly; Eren wouldn't move on so quickly. Hell, a few weeks ago Eren was literally begging for a second chance, declaring his undying love for Jean. Even if Eren had miraculously found another man – _miraculously_ , Jean thought bitterly, because he knew that Eren was a catch – it couldn't be serious enough for him to tell Jean to fuck off. Yet he had done just that, Jean remembered with a painful clench of his heart. Maybe Eren had truly just grown tired of the games; the constant toying around, hurt and rejection had even made Jean's head swim. It _had_ to be another man. Perhaps another man that had convinced Eren that Jean wasn't worth his time. But could it have happened so suddenly?

 _Yes_.

Eren admired Levi. That was no secret. He admired the man's strength and constitution, his resolute attitude and his ruthless nature. Eren loved Levi. And boy, Eren was not shy in telling Jean what he would do if he got the man alone for twenty four hours. _Levi wouldn't be walking at the end of it_ , Eren would joke. Jean joked with, agreeing. They'd even joked about having a threesome.

But Levi Ackerman wasn't gay.

It was normal for couples to jest like that. Normal; Jean and Eren had even gone so far as jokingly allowing a "celebrity pass". In other words, if one got the chance, they were allowed to take it, no foul. The only condition was they had to take a video, or at least pictures. It was all fun and games, but what if…

Secondly; if Levi were gay, would it not be public knowledge? No man that good looking did not fuck around at least now and then. Levi was always known as a sexually void individual, but surely he even had needs? If he had fucked a man, someone would have said something. Perhaps even said man. There was no conceivable way that a man of his status would possibly be able to hide something like that. While Levi didn't get particularly large media coverage, scandals of homosexuality could, and would, rock any public figure.

Thirdly; why the hell would Levi want Eren? Yes, Eren was a catch, but he was just a normal guy. A part-time student, part-time waiter and wannabe MMA fighter. There was nothing spectacular about Eren that a man of Levi's social and financial status would find alluring. Then again, when it came to the _need_ , men didn't often take these things into consideration.

Perhaps…maybe it was all true. Maybe Levi and Eren were really seeing each other, but maybe it was all just a fun conquest for Levi.

Hell, even his own relationship with Eren started with "one for the bragging book".

The thought pissed Jean off. As improbable as it was, the thought of someone using Eren made Jean so angry he could kill. Ironic, was it not? But what made it worse, Jean reckoned, was the fact that Eren was willing to give up any potential of them ever being together for that simple conquest. It hurt, and it hurt like hell.

The worst part? Eren would do that. Eren was so infatuated with Levi that if cutting ties with Jean would be what it would take to get into the man's pants, he would do it without a second thought.

That hurt.

But what were the chances?

Eren wasn't at the dojo on Tuesday, and neither was Levi. Jean tried to chalk it down to coincidence – Eren had tests, and Levi's whole life didn't revolve around Titan Dojo. Besides, Levi had an injury; his presence at the dojo would be purely administrative. He had probably come in earlier during the day.

Wednesday came. Having been privy to a conversation he had no right hearing, Jean knew that there was a chance that Eren would come today. True as bob, Eren pitched up a little before six that evening.

Jean had already finished his training for the evening, and was preparing to go home when Eren sauntered in…with Levi. As Jean tied the laces of his shoes, he tried to keep his eyes off the two men as they made their way to the back of the dojo, to the area Levi and the other higher ranked fighters usually trained. He tried and he failed miserably; his eyes followed the pair, desperately seeking something, _anything_ , to indicate that their relationship transcended that of mentor and mentee.

Was he disappointed or relieved when he saw nothing but Eren's jovial chattering and Levi's near-complete ignorance of Eren? Jean couldn't tell.

He settled for watching the more experienced fighters fighting in the ring. Eren had not looked at him once.

With a sigh, Jean realized he was chasing ghosts. There was no way there was anything going on between Eren and Levi. It was impossible.

Jean eventually grabbed his bag and left.

Not in the mood to go home, he made his way to the store and mindlessly strolled through the isles in search of absolutely nothing but a way to kill time. He must have been in the store for nearly half an hour and ended up walking out with only a pack of gum and his raging thoughts.

When he got into his car, he sat there for a moment in the silence, wondering if there was anything he could still do to win Eren over. Perhaps, once the competition was over, he would try again. Maybe it would just be better to give Eren some time, and eventually try and talk to him again. It wouldn't hurt to try again, would it?

As he was about to start his car, he saw movement in his rearview mirror. He thought nothing of it; it was just a pedestrian that he needed to be mindful of when backing out of his parking space. But as he took a closer look, he realized it was not one, but two pedestrians. It was not any two pedestrians, but the very two that had plagued his thoughts for days.

Jean held his breath and sunk down into his seat as if he would be caught otherwise. He observed as they transitioned from his rearview mirror to his side mirror. He watched, breath caught and heart pounding in his chest, as Eren and Levi walked to a car parked behind him. The silence in his car was maddening as he watched, with bated breath, how Levi, after glancing around the parking lot, opened the door for Eren – who gushed like Eren typically did when someone flirted with him – before getting into the driver's side.

Jean watched, slack jawed, as the car backed out of the parking, before driving off.

Once gone, Jean jumped out of his car. He glanced around the parking lot in search of Eren's car and found that it was not there.

 _No, you're imagining things_ , Jean thought, shaking his head. He looked again. He went as far as walking down every isle of the parking lot, but his search yielded nothing.

That could only mean one thing: Eren had come to the dojo with Levi.

If that was true, then Eren and Levi's relationship transcended mentor and mentee.

With a curse on his tongue, rage hot in his veins and the hurt of rejection and deception itching at his flesh, Jean got back into his car, slamming his door shut before he threw his head onto his steering wheel.

Eren and Levi were more familiar that he had initially thought. Suddenly, the possibility of the thoughts he had had in the previous hours and days had grown exponentially.

* * *

 **Dun dun dun!**

 **Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Stay tuned for the next episode. ;)**

 **OS**


	37. Chapter 37: Date

**A/N: I literally lost track of time. I apologize for making you wait so long for this update. Amidst the new job and other shenanigans, free time has dropped to zero. Please, please forgive.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Snk, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

Levi found himself out to lunch with Isabel and Farlan, something he didn't particularly dislike, but something he considered something of a drag. He did not like eating out, and he did not like socializing more than what was absolutely mandatory to retain "friendship" status, and the couple knew this. That was why they only ever asked him out when they felt that it was due time to ascertain that status…a time period Levi found too frequent.

Out at Smith's as per usual, the trio sat at their usual booth, with wine, in no rush to order food. Levi knew Eren wouldn't be working today, since he had a test at college today. A young blonde served them, and Isabel was almost as infatuated with the brat as she had been with Eren. Levi idly wondered if Isabel would attempt to hook them up as well.

"I'm telling you, those kids will be the death of me," Isabel said before taking a large sip of wine. "Top me up, please, baby."

"I wonder what the kids' parents would say if they saw you drinking like this," Farlan said as he obliged to her request.

Levi raised a brow. _I wonder what the kids' parents would think if they knew what she does behind closed doors._

"Don't even say it, Levi," Isabel cautioned.

With a shrug, Levi surrendered. This was one argument he did not want to get into.

"You've been awfully quiet," Farlan said. "Top up?"

"Please," Levi said, shifting his glass nearer to Farlan. "Am I not always quiet?"

"Actually, you talk a lot," Isabel said. "A lot of shit, but a lot, nonetheless."

Farlan chuckled and handed Levi his refilled glass. Levi thanked him but made no move to drink the wine. Instead, his eyes scanned the restaurant – it was busy, considering it was the middle of the day on a Wednesday, but that was to be expected of Smith's. The jovial blonde that was serving them, Armin, was someone that Levi recognized as the brat that his brat had gushed with behind closed doors the first time he had seen Eren here. He wondered if the two were just colleagues or if they were friends. If friends, he wondered how close.

Levi realized that he didn't know that much about Eren. He knew so little, yet they had done so much. How was that possible? Had Levi not advertised himself as a gentleman?

"He's looking for Eren," Isabel whispered to Farlan. The pair chuckled.

Steely grey eyes trained on Isabel, lethal in their glare – a glare which she was impervious to – but a second passed before his lips turned up in a smirk. "If I were looking for Eren, I'd start in my bed."

Farlan blinked. Isabel gasped. Both of them stared at Levi, gob smacked. Aware of and pleased by their utter shock, Levi decided to put the cherry on top of the cake; he _winked_ at them, noting how both of their jaws fell slack, before he picked up his glass of wine and took a dainty sip.

"You do know you're going to have to elaborate on that?" Farlan said.

Isabel slammed her hand on the table. Levi thought, not for the first time, that he was damn grateful that they were usually secluded from the main dining area.

"I need to know everything, mister!" Isabel said.

Unable to resist, Levi simply leaned forward, elbow on the table and chin resting on his loosely curled fist. "I'm not one of your kiddies, Izzy. You can't "mister" me."

A devious grin twisted Isabel's features, her strikingly emerald eyes dazzling with mischief. Levi remembered always thinking she had gorgeous eyes, the depth of their color dazzling and unique…that was until he had seen Eren's eyes for the first time. Isabel's paled in comparison.

"You love it when I "mister" you," she teased.

Levi flashed a toothy grin. "It's better when Eren does it."

"Okay!" Farlan said, hands in the air. "That's it. Izzy, baby, you shut up. Levi," Farlan pointed an accusing finger at him, "talk."

"And say what?" Levi questioned innocently.

"Did you fuck him?" Farlan asked at the same time that Isabel asked, "Did you play with him?"

The two turned to look at one another, blinking, before Isabel smacked Farlan on the arm. "What is with you men?" she cried out.

Farlan flinched, despite the open-handed smack not hurting at all. "What? I want to know if my man got some." Farlan glanced up at Levi. "It's been a while."

As much as Levi wanted to argue, or give a snarky reply, Farlan was right. It had been eons since he'd last gotten laid, and that hadn't changed overnight. _Forgive me for having morals and taste_ , Levi thought bitterly.

"So…" Isabel prompted.

"Yes and no," Levi said.

"Which is yes and which is no?" Isabel asked, eyes borderline bulging in panic.

"Wouldn't you love to know?" Levi mumbled before taking another sip of his wine.

Just as Isabel was about to open her mouth to argue, or pry, further, Armin appeared beside the table with a notebook in his hand. Levi made a mental note to tip him generously for saving him from – or at least postponing – a barrage of questions.

"Are you all ready to order?" Armin asked cheerfully. His eyes were fixed on Levi, regarding the man with amusement.

Levi wondered just what Eren had told this kid.

"Steak, medium to rare with salad," Levi said.

Isabel pouted as if she were deliberating which appetite needed to be sated first – physical or curiosity.

"I'll have a uh…" she glanced at the menu again. "Give me the surf 'n turf special, please."

Armin turned to Farlan, who said, "Kilogram ribs with chips and onion rings."

Levi clicked his tongue at this. "You're a barbarian."

"My wife loves it."

Armin confirmed the orders with a blush before rushing off. It may have been only a minute, but it was enough to have let Isabel calm down…at least marginally. As soon as Armin was out of earshot, she pounced on Levi again.

"Details. Now."

"I don't kiss and tell," Levi simply stated. Oh, he was loving this.

Isabel groaned. "Baby! Help me!"

"You may not kiss and tell, but you don't kiss a lot, so when you do, you have to tell," Farlan reasoned.

Levi raised a brow. Farlan had a point. While he was not one to kiss and tell, he could not deny that he felt some form of accomplishment at what had transpired between him and Eren. He would, under no circumstances, divulge the details, but it wasn't beyond him to at least want to admit that something had happened. Just thinking about what had happened made the man smile.

"Levi totally got some ass," Farlan whispered obnoxiously.

"I did not "get some ass", you vulgar prick," Levi snapped, his tone playful. Isabel and Farlan raised their brows in unison – Levi thought, not for the first time in their long and odd friendship, that the pair were frighteningly in sync. "We did, however, have…relations, of sorts."

"So…no ass?" Farlan asked.

Levi eyed him, unsmiling, while Isabel snickered. "No, you dimwit. No ass."

"So, are you guys a thing?" Isabel asked. She took an unnecessarily large gulp of her wine before sliding her glass over to Farlan, who topped it up without question.

"We're…negotiating…" Levi admitted. However, he knew they were far beyond negotiating.

"Are you going to play with him?" Isabel asked. Her tone, this time, betrayed the insecurity beneath her curiosity. Levi pinned it in an instant; a new playmate may very well signal the end of their arrangement.

As much as he would love to tease the pair, he could not be cryptic. Isabel had every right to know.

"Yes," Levi said. He took a sip of his wine, much less dainty than before. "We played once."

"That was fast," Farlan commented, and Isabel hummed in agreement.

"I know," Levi said with a sigh.

Levi was not one to let someone in easily. While his infatuation with Eren was far from young, he had surprised himself with how quickly things had progressed. He had found himself wondering on more than one occasion if he and Eren would be here today if it weren't for Petra returning her collar.

"Petra returned her collar," Levi said. "I uh…" He cleared his throat and took the last sip of his wine. Farlan, bless his soul, refilled it without needing a prompt. "It was a little rough. I didn't know who to call and ended up calling Eren. It accelerated things between us."

"Oh, honey, I'm sorry," Isabel said. "Why did she return it?"

"You could've called me, you know," Farlan said.

Levi looked into his oldest friend's eyes and nodded solemnly. "I know. I just didn't want to be a burden." He turned to Isabel and said, "She met someone a while ago and they have reached the point where they want to play monogamously."

"That's good for her," Isabel said with a sad smile.

"You're never a burden, Levi," Farlan said. He caught Levi's eye again, and Levi felt guilty; Farlan looked betrayed. "I'm always here for you, no matter the time of day or whatever. We are both here for you."

Levi sighed. "I know. I wasn't in a good space. I wasn't thinking clearly. I wanted…" Levi could not believe he was going to admit this out loud for the first time. "I wanted more than just a friend."

"Oh…" Isabel and Farlan said in unison. Damn their synchronization.

Shrugging, Levi tipped the glass of wine to his lips again. "Well, nothing happened. We went back to my place and he slept with me. Platonically."

Levi remembered the night as clearly as his clouded mind would allow him to. He remembered in staccato detail how Eren had tended to his wounds and helped him clean the dojo before going home with him. He remembered the comfort he felt with Eren's body beside him in his bed, and the eventual state of peace he reached knowing he was not alone. Most of all, he remembered how Eren had seen him with his walls down, raw, bleeding and exposed.

"So, do you think you guys are going to work out?" Isabel asked. There was that insecurity again.

Levi nodded. "I think so."

"I'm happy for you, bud." Farlan smiled warmly. "You really deserve it. Lord alone knows you've been one lonely grouch for a little too long."

Lunch came then. The trio enjoyed their meals over lighthearted conversation, and as they joked amidst their dining, Levi found his heart warming as the fact that he had two damn good friends was driven home. For the first time in as long as he could remember, Levi was feeling excited by what life outside the ring could bring him.

* * *

Eren had called not long after he had parted ways with his friends, telling Levi he would be at the dojo, but would be a little late. Levi had then insisted on picking Eren up, citing that he would like to spend some time with Eren after training if his study schedule would allow. Levi suspected the brat was neglecting his studies, but he had assured Levi that it was fine and he would happily spend the night.

After a quick, hard cardio session, the two found themselves on their way to Levi's apartment, not for the first time. Levi had grown fond of this familiarity and found that he enjoyed Eren's company, yet despite all the time they had spent together and the intimate nature of their relationship, they had much to learn about one another. Tonight, he decided, would be about discovery of one another's minds, not bodies.

"Are you going to shower with me?" Eren asked as they entered Levi's home.

The older man threw Eren an incredulous look. "Is that your invitation for me to join your jerk-off session?"

For a moment, Eren was taken aback. His jaw went slack and his eyes widened in awe, a reaction Levi absolutely loved to illicit from the younger man. Eren, however, was quick to recover, and when he did, despite the heat of embarrassment flushing his cheeks, his eyes had regained the furious edge Levi swore he could live for.

"I don't need to jerk off when I'm with you," Eren quipped.

 _Touché_ , Levi thought with a smirk. "Go shower, brat, I will start with dinner.

"What are you thinking of making?" Eren asked.

Levi shrugged. "Something with chicken."

Satisfied, Eren trotted off towards the bathroom. Levi watched the teen strut down the hallway, idly wondering to himself how he had resisted that ass for so long. He also found himself wondering for how long he would still be able to do so – having been in a dormant sexual state, Levi had been deluded into thinking his sexual appetite was minuscule. Since Eren had come into his life, quite literally, the man found himself becoming horny easier and more frequently. It was as if Eren had the jumper cables to the battery that was his libido, and now the thing was charging at inhuman speed.

It's not to say that he didn't want to fuck Eren, because boy, he wanted nothing more. He wanted to feel what it would be like to sink into the teen's soft warmth, to feel the pulsing of that passionate heart from the inside. Levi wanted to take everything Eren had to offer him just as he wanted to lay himself bare for Eren. He wanted to hear Eren cry out for more; that devious little masochist begging for Levi to absolutely _wreck_ him. Levi wanted to cum inside Eren. Again and again and again.

Just the thought of it had Levi's cock awakening as his mind conjured up sultry images of claiming Eren in that way.

Levi abandoned the idea of chicken in favor of tuna. Eren liked fish, didn't he? He hadn't complained last time. With that in mind, Levi placed some pasta shells on the stove to boil, before setting out various ingredients for a salad. It would take fifteen minutes to make, at most, and would be enough to feed his ravenous brat and his ravenous self. He had barely touched his food at Smith's.

Levi had just finished chopping the spring onion, cucumber and tomatoes, and was in the process of finely shredding the lettuce when Eren returned. Just the soft patter of the boy's feed on the floor announced his arrival, as Eren was silent for a while, no doubt observing Levi. The man left the brunette, opting to rather focus on the task at hand lest he be distracted by what he was willing to bet a month's profit was a bare-chested Eren.

Eventually, Eren spoke. "I thought we were having chicken?"

"While you were jerking off, I changed my mind," Levi said.

Eren huffed, causing Levi to grin. He still hadn't turned to face the brunette, who then said, "I did no such thing, just so you know. I'll leave that up to you."

Did Levi imagine it, or was there a dark, sultry undertone to Eren's voice? He did not think the brash youngster capable of seduction merely by voice, but Levi would be damned if he said that wasn't sexy. Levi turned to Eren then, albeit only to raise a brow, and when he did, he nearly balked at the sight that greeted him.

As per prediction, Eren was bare-chested. What Levi did not expect was how _short_ his boxers were. They seemed to be barely covering the essentials, creating an attractive bulge that left just enough to the imagination to entice. The short, black boxers exposed Eren's long, powerful legs, and Levi found himself yet again fantasizing about those legs wrapped around his waist.

His eyes ran the length of Eren's body in appreciation, unashamed and slowly so that Eren could see. And Eren was quick to catch on; he spread his legs a little, cocked his head to the side with a subtle bite of his bottom lip and threw Levi the sexiest com-hither look Levi had had the privilege of seeing.

"I think I might just take you up on that offer," Levi said with a smirk.

"It wasn't an offer…" Eren said. He grinned deviously. "It was a demand." Levi raised a brow. Eren's grin widened as he added, " _Sir_."

What was it about that damn word coming from that damned brat's mouth? Levi clenched his jaw, holding Eren's gaze long enough to note Eren's pleasure at having made him react, before turning his attention back to the lettuce. The pasta should be nearly ready.

"Go put on a shirt," Levi said. "You can't sit at the table like that."

"Aww," Eren whined, "I thought you liked looking at my body."

"I do, but I would like to eat without a fucking erection"

Eren snickered before trotting off. _That damned brat_ , Levi thought. Eren was, without a doubt purposefully trying to push Levi's buttons. Oh, it was working, alright, which left Levi somewhere between curious and frustrated.

In the time Eren took to make himself presentable, Levi had finished the tuna pasta salad, and if he may say so himself, it looked delicious. He instructed Eren to sit as he set the table, placing two large candles and sparkling water, sparkling grape juice and two wine glasses at each place, before dimming the lights.

"I am allowed to drink, you know," Eren said. "Mommy said it's fine."

Levi resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "Firstly, I already had two glasses of wine today, and secondly, you have a competition in a few days and you need to watch what you put into your body."

Eren raised a brow with a grin, "Is Levi Ackerman a lightweight?"

"No," Levi snapped. "It was a light wine and fucking five hours ago. I'm stone cold sober."

"Is this that date you owe me?" Eren asked.

A blush threatened to touch Levi's cheek, thankfully hidden by the dim lighting of the room, but he had contained it. He never explicitly stated that this was a date, but considering the effort he had put into it, he was somewhat happy, albeit embarrassed, that Eren had taken it as such. Levi had never been a remotely romantic person, so gestures like this was out of character for him, but that being said, he was also someone who wanted to put in some sort of effort for a potential partner.

So, instead of act bashful, Levi reverted to his usual response when cornered; irritation. "Does it look like a fucking date?"

"Actually, yes," Eren replied quickly. "And I must say, I like it. Can you put some of that nice music on that you played the other day?"

 _The music that had me on my knees sucking your cock within minutes_ , Levi wanted to quip, but held his tongue and silently set up the music as per Eren's request. None too soon, the atmosphere was complete, and he had to admit, he was glad that Eren had asked for it.

"Now then, a toast," Eren said. Eren handed him a glass of sparkling grape juice and took one for himself.

"To what?" Levi asked.

"Us."

The two men stared at each other in the dimly lit room, the flickering of the candles casting dancing shadows across their faces that could not hide the emotions in either's eyes. Eren's greens were filled with intrigue, happiness, tranquility and admiration. Levi's eyes betrayed his infatuation, care, passion and protectiveness for the boy he had claimed as his own. Both men raised their glasses.

"May it be a journey filled with happiness, discovery and fun for both of us," Eren said with a smile, before he touched his glass to Levi's.

Tongue-tied, Levi simply nodded before taking a sip of his juice. He gestured for Eren to dish up first, and watched as the younger man piled an inhuman amount of food into his bowl. Levi resisted the urge to remark, knowing that Eren had come from varsity and had likely not eaten anything substantial all day. Speaking of…

"What are you studying, Eren?" Levi asked as he began to dish.

"Sports Science," Eren answered.

"What year are you?" Levi asked.

"Only third year," Eren said. "I didn't start studying right after school."

"Gap year?"

Eren frowned a little. "Not really…I never had math or science at school, so I had to do a year bridging course to get it. Then I worked a little bit to save up for my studies."

This was unexpected. While Eren did not seem particularly like a self-entitled prick, unlike his ex, Levi always found himself surprised when youngsters found their own way in life. It was rare.

"So your studies are self-funded?" Levi asked.

"Yeah," Eren said. He smiled proudly as he added, "And I bought my car myself."

Levi was impressed. He loved a man who was ambitious, headstrong and independent. There was a lot more to this brat than he'd initially thought…a hell of a lot more than meets the eye.

"Mikasa served in the military health services," Eren continued without prompt. "She qualified as a paramedic there." He shook his head. "She's one tough woman. She should be at Titan instead of me. She'd do much better."

"You're doing well, though," Levi was quick to say. "Your improvement in the last few weeks especially…it's been exponential."

Eren shrugged. "I have a good sensei."

"You have talent and determination. No matter how good a sensei, a student is useless if he doesn't want to succeed."

"Can I ask you something?"

There was no way Levi would deny the brat, so he nodded as he chewed.

"Why did you decide to help me?"

That was a good question. Levi ate a few more forkfuls as he thought about his answer. He had asked himself the same thing a hundred times, and he could never give himself an honest, straight answer. Did his eyes fall to Eren the very first time he saw the brat at his dojo? Yes. Did he find himself intrigued by the rambunctious way the brunette fought, as if every swing would seal his fate? Definitely. Was he captivated by those emerald eyes that seemed to hold the culmination of the world zeal? Most certainly. Did he want Eren Yeager. Simply, yes.

It hadn't become an obsession. Hell, Levi barely acknowledged that the brat churned anything within him for months. Yet every time he saw a certain something – Eren's passion as he fought or flirted, the raw power in his uncoordinated movements or the unadulterated rage when he failed, to name a few – he found a little part of him itching to know more. He found that he wanted to know the man behind the beast, the potential fighter behind the brawler, and the undoubtedly passionate lover behind that handsome face. While Eren was far from occupying his every thought, when Eren did pop up in his mind, he would daydream, sometimes even fantasize, just a little bit. Sometimes when he played with Isabel, her startling green eyes would remind him of Eren. He began wondering what Eren would be like in the positions he placed Isabel in.

Levi had never outright _wanted_ Eren, but whenever he thought of the possibility, it was less of "it would be nice" and more of "I have to have him". He would never have pursued Eren of his own accord, but when the chance came, he could not pass it up.

Long story short, he had no real answer to give Eren.

"I don't know," he said. Eren looked disappointed, which bothered Levi. He decided to try harder. "I was intrigued with you for a while." That caught Eren's attention. "I would never have pursued you, though." Levi smiled as he noted the disappointment returning to Eren's features. "I'm still a closet faggot, remember?"

"Don't call yourself that," Eren mumbled.

And despite having a temper and marginal social etiquette, Eren had limits. Levi noted this.

"Sorry," Levi said, no meaning behind the word. "Naturally I noticed Kirstein besting you very time you fought. What I found frustrating was the fact that it wasn't on skill, but your inability to keep your focus. I knew that if you could hone your mind, you would make an excellent fighter. When I learned what Kirstein is to you, I understood your anger towards him." Levi sighed before smiling a little. "I knew that it would take one hell of a person to tame that mind of yours. I knew I could do it. I wanted to see you win. So I offered to help you."

At the end of it all, the brunette smiled. Levi wanted to kick himself in the ass for how simple it sounded when he said it out loud, compared to when his thoughts swirled around endlessly in his mind.

"Another question," Eren said. Levi raised a brow, prompting the brunette to continue. "Why do you want more with me?"

"I could ask you the same question," Levi said without missing a beat.

Eren chuckled and nodded his head, mouthing _touché_ before wolfing down the remainder of his dinner. It surprised Levi to see Eren dish a second helping.

"Do you think this is actually going to work out?" Eren asked. "I mean, as more than us being acquaintances and play mates?"

"I'd like it to," Levi said. The unsure tone of Eren's voice did not sit well with Levi. Did Eren think that Levi just wanted to fool around with him? "I told you a while ago, Eren, I am not going to waste my time if you can't commit."

Eren smiled as he chewed, something Levi found truly disgusting, but he had to give the brat some credit for at least attempting to hide his half-masticated glob of food. After swallowing, Eren said, "So you want to get married?"

Trust this brat to see that.

"Don't fuck me over, and we'll talk."

Satisfied with that answer, Eren continued eating in silence. He and Levi continued chatting throughout dinner, asking each other about everything ranging from embarrassing childhood stories to taste in movies. They learnt that, while they had few similarities, both were quite interested in what the other liked, so Levi knew there was potential for this. While Eren was still a brat in his eyes, this brat had a surprisingly mature streak; Levi had no doubt that the two of them would be able to work this out. Though as certain as he was that it could work, he was just as certain that they would bump heads along the way.

They would cross that bridge when they got to it, if they ever got to it.

* * *

 **Thanks for the patience.**

 **OS**


	38. Chapter 38: The Flogging

**A/N: I don't think I have the right to apologize anymore. It's getting old. But seriously, life has been a bit hectic. Got a new job and will be leaving the country soon, to work in less than savory conditions, so things have been hectic.**

 **Thank you for sticking around, though! Thank you for the favorites and follows, and mostly for the reviews. I know how frustrating it is as a reader to have to wait so long for updates (been there plenty) and I do feel terrible for making you wait, but unfortunately life has no pause button.**

 **This chapter is a little shorter but when trying to flesh it out, I realized it was perfect this way. I hope this makes up a little for my absenteeism.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters, or any other brands or merchandise mentioned in this fic.**

* * *

After another lengthy conversation about dos and don'ts, Levi was ready to play with Eren for a second time. Eren's words were stuck in Levi's mind as he set the stage for their play, words that all but begged for violence. _I want to hurt. I have this weird rage boiling up inside of me and I want it to be beaten down_. Levi had told Eren that he was incapacitated and could not deliver what he sought, amending it with the fact that that was probably best – by his own admission, Levi could be quite brutal if a sub called for him to be. He had thus agreed to give Eren a flogging, placing a disclaimer on the fact that it would be sub-par thanks to him having to use his weak hand.

Eren had only laughed and said, "I wouldn't know a good flogging from a bad flogging."

Levi selected his favorite songs from Nightwish's album Dark Passion Play, to allow for a slow buildup and a hard climax that would be followed through by a soft, slow descent. It would not be a particularly long play, but it would be intense; Levi knew that when he was done with Eren, the brunette would be stripped of all the anger he was holding onto.

 _Make me bleed, Levi_ , Eren had said. Levi clenched his jaw as he changed the bulbs in the various lamps around the room to red. He would love to see that sweet crimson trickle down Eren's skin, but he knew the boy wasn't yet ready for such brutality. Yes, he was keen, but they still had to grow. Eren trusted Levi, and Levi had to solidify that trust into an unshakable foundation before he dared to cross the line that would toy with Eren's basic survival instincts.

If done too soon, he could scar Eren irreparably.

The room was soon shrouded in an ethereal red glow. Levi smirked; he could feel the need to inflict pain beginning to trickle into his bloodstream, mixing in with his blood like a drug and slowly infiltrating his mind. He allowed it to take him, the change – he was more than willing to shed the skin of the man he called Levi Ackerman and become the bare Dominant Eren needed him to be.

He positioned his Saint Andrew's Cross at the center of the room and gathered his implements. Three floggers; one light suede flogger, a heavier rope flogger and then the one that would deliver the majority of the pain, the oiled leather flogger. He tested each in his weaker hand, warming his shoulder up and flicking his wrist this way and that as he delivered blows to the cross. It wouldn't be his best, but it he would make it the best he possibly could. After redressing, this time adding gauntlets to his shoulder harness and a mask that obscured his identity, Levi added one final implement to his arsenal – a nine-inch talon-blade dagger sharp enough to slit a grown man's throat with absolutely no effort.

Eren knocked on the door then.

"Come in," Levi said, the voice of the Dominant heavy in the room. As Eren opened the door, Levi started the music, allowing the soft melody of Meadows of Heaven to drift through the air.

Levi watched with eyes as keen as a hawk's as Eren shuffled into the room, completely naked. The brunette seemed nervous and unsure, but the unmistakable glint of determination and _wanting_ was rife in his eyes. It made Levi salivate with the desire to absolutely consume the delicacy presented to him.

Eren fell into his role surprisingly quickly. He refrained from making eye contact with Levi despite never having been explicitly told to do so. He remained still unless instructed to move, and when instructed, he complied with unwavering obedience. There was something sinfully sweet about Eren behaving this way without prompt, something that reiterated what both men had already suspected; their dynamic was natural.

Once Eren was secured to the cross, Levi took a moment to admire his work. He smirked as he noted Eren's cock had already began to stir, and he idly wondered if there was anything that did not make this brat horny.

Pressing right up against Eren from behind, making the younger man gasp, Levi spoke, lips moving right beside Eren's ear. "What's your safe word, Eren?"

"R-red," Eren stuttered.

Levi smirked. "Good. Say it, and I will stop immediately. Okay?" Eren nodded. Levi growled and laid and open hand firmly on Eren's ass, the sting of the slap reverberating in the room as it melted in with Eren's gasp. "Answer me."

"Yes!" Eren said.

With a _tch_ falling off his tongue, Levi raised his hand and brought his palm down to Eren's bare, waiting ass yet again. As Eren gasped, Levi spoke, voice low and dangerous. "Yes, _what_?"

"Yes, sir," Eren said, his voice breathy, borderline needy.

Levi could feel Eren trembling beneath him. He took a moment to caress the ass he had laid hands on, assessing if the trembling was due to fear or anticipation. He could feel Eren's heart beating, but the brunette's breath, though fast, was even and deep. Eren was not afraid…Eren was _fucking thrilled_.

"You smell good, Eren," Levi said, making a point of his observation by taking a deep sniff at the nape of Eren's neck. Such a vulnerable spot, yet left completely exposed in a show of undisputed trust. Eren shivered visibly as Levi's nose skimmed his sensitive skin.

"Thank you," Eren whispered, hesitating a moment before quietly adding, "s-sir…"

 _Fuck me_ , Levi thought, clenching his jaw as that stupid, three-letter word went straight to his head…and not the one on his shoulders.

"Good," Levi purred. Oh, he knew the power of his voice. He was willing to bet his car that Eren was as hard as steel right now. "Very good, my sweet Eren." He trailed his lips across Eren's nape, dragging them lightly across the soft, tanned skin to Eren's shoulder. "And if you want me to slow down, what will you tell me?"

"Yellow," Eren breathed out as he tilted his head to allow Levi better access to his shoulder. "Sir."

"Very good boy," Levi cooed, dragging out _boy_ in an almost taunting manner.

Stepping away from Eren, Levi closed his eyes for a moment to bask in the glory of all that was laid before him. This man, secured to the cross, bare and aching for pain was _his_. Eren was _his_ , and his alone. It was more than a privilege to be this exquisite creature's Dominant for the second time, it was a damn honor. It was an honor that Levi would uphold with the highest reverence by pleasing his submissive in every way he knew how.

He started with ice.

Taking one large ice cube, Levi pressed it to Eren's nape, watching the man tense and hiss out a profanity as the unexpected chill assaulted his body. Those muscles thrummed vibrantly beneath flawless tan skin, causing Levi to smirk drunkenly in sheer appreciation. He took that single cube and ran it across every inch of Eren's exposed flesh, watching it melt away, leaving a beautiful shimmer on the boy's skin. Eren's intermittent chills became more frequent, but he never said the word. However, Levi knew that the chill had begun to seep into his submissive's skin.

So he stopped. Eren whined as the ice was removed from his skin, causing Levi to bite his lip to repress a smile. That brat truly wanted the worst.

Eren's skin would be sensitive to touch, now that it had been cooled. With this, Levi began to drag that deadly blade across his sub's skin. Eren moaned and dropped his head forward, panting heavily for a minute as the sharp, piercing sensation was left in the wake of the blade. Levi knew that running the tip of this blade across skin, even lightly, felt like the skin was being sliced open. Added to that the water dripping down Eren's body, and Levi had created the perfect illusion of being cut.

Something Eren quite obviously _loved_.

 _You're so fucking perfect_ , Levi thought, pausing for a moment as the violent drumming and guitars drove deep into his consciousness. _Yes…this is what I want. This is mine._ He glared at Eren, waiting, aching. _Mine._

When Levi moved to fetch his first flogger, he saw that Eren's cock was fully erect. Not only that, but there was a long dribble of precum oozing from the very tip, reaching almost halfway to the ground but still connected to the tiny opening from which it had escaped. Levi licked his lips as he imagined, or rather _remembered_ , the sweet-savory delight of Eren's precum. He could feel his own length beginning to harden at the sultry sight before him, and for the first time in a very, very long time, he had to consciously remind himself to stay focused and not enjoy the banquet.

Levi started light. He struck Eren's back softly, using his lightest flogger to illicit no more than a pleasant thudding against Eren's back. Levi knew it didn't hurt; the flogger was small, light, and its tassels weren't designed to deliver pain like his oiled leather flogger. For all intents and purposes, this was just a warm up, teasing Eren's already sensitive back and preparing him for more to come.

At first, the brunette flinched with every strike, but soon became accustomed to them. Levi varied his rhythm and the strength of his blows, and while they caused Eren to jolt, the frightened flinching was no more. The Dominant nodded and smiled to himself, pleased at having put his submissive at ease once more.

A quick glance down showed that more precum was leaking from Eren's cock. A miniscule puddle had formed on the floor between the boy's legs, and the string had grown in thickness and mass. Eren's cock bobbed up and down intermittently as it jolted, and his head was the deep crimson color of a man _aching_ for release. He wouldn't last very long. Levi deliberated, but was quick to conclude that he would rather let Eren taste the devastating sting of sweet oiled leather rather than the little tapping thuds of rope.

Now would be the first time Levi would test Eren's threshold for pain. The thought was damn near intoxicating. Levi adjusted himself in his pants before taking up a wide-legged stance behind Eren, swinging the flogger through the air, not only to customize himself to its weight, but to torture Eren. The brunette was rigid with anticipation; Levi could see his neck muscles straining as he fought the instinct to look back at the tormenting whistle escalating behind him.

And then Levi's favorite song on the album began to play, Master Passion Greed. The deep guitar thrust him further into his role, violently thrusting him from mere Dominant to a dominant sadist. He was going to give Eren the pain the boy wanted if it was the last thing he did.

With that in mind, Levi raised the flogger and bored it down across Eren's back, striking in such a way that the tassels licked the skin of his upper back with a fiery acid.

Eren cried out loudly. Levi had never been more grateful for soundproofing in all his life. He had heard people scream at his ministrations, but he had never heard such a desperately euphoric yet strangely bloodcurdling cry come from a sub before. He paused, worried that he may have gone too far in that single blow.

"Don't stop!" Eren growled out when Levi had not struck again. The Dominant froze; he had never imagined Eren could sound so primal, so wildly animalistic. The voice that had just spoken to him was not that of a man, but that of an untamed beast on a violent quest for self-satisfaction.

 _Jesus, Eren…_

Levi was physically incapable of ignoring such a primal cry. He struck again. Eren cried out, laughing maniacally as a strangled _yes_ fell from his lips. Again, and again, Levi delivered single blows until Eren dared to taunt him. _Is that all you've got?_

 _Not even fucking close!_ Levi had growled under his breath, before his final assault began.

Flogging skillfully in a carefully crafted figure-of-eight, Levi bored down on Eren's now reddened back with no mercy.

"Yes, yes, yes!" Eren chanted, head bobbing slightly. Levi could only imagine the deranged look on the young masochist's face, and that single thought was enough to drive him to push further.

As his pattern continued, Levi intermittently snuck in harder blows. Each harder strike earned him either a moan or a declaration of _yes_ or _that's it_ , and when he threw his weight into it, Eren moaned like a man about to cum and let out a throaty _fuuuuuck…_

And then Eren came undone.

There was no warning. Eren made no sound over and above the cries of delight he had been blessing Levi with. There was no stuttering of his hips, no tensing of his frame. In fact, if Levi had not been paying attention to Eren as attentively as he had been, he would never have seen the younger man cum.

Bursts of brilliant white shot from Eren's jolting cock, coating the floor and shooting as far as three feet from the brunette. As desperate as Levi was to watch every single spurt, he forced himself to focus on his sub, being the wind beneath the wings of bliss, as his softening blows guided Eren through orgasm. Eventually, Eren was spent. There was nothing more to expel, despite his cock still jolting and twitching as if it were still cumming.

 _The Cadence of Her Last Breath._

Eren's body finally shuddered. The weight of his satisfaction bore down on him then. He dropped his head and took a long shuddering breath. For the first time, Levi saw what he had done to Eren; the tanned skin was no longer flawless. Welts raised up on the once uninterrupted planes of golden bronze, and dark bruises were already beginning to form where the tassels of the flogger had met their mark with power and precision.

Levi did not know whether to feel guilty or proud.

Wasting no time, he freed Eren from his binds on the cross before scooping him up in his arms. He hastily carried Eren to the couch, stripped his own mask from his face and cradled his dearest sub's head to his chest, waiting for the inevitable…that never came.

The brunette's breathing slowed. His heart was quick to find its resting rhythm. Every tremble and twitch of his body came to rest, but not once did Eren whine, wail or whimper. He laid perfectly still, nuzzling against Levi's chest much like a kitten seeking his mother's warmth. A lazy hand reached up to trail curious fingers along Levi's bicep, causing a shiver to run the length of the man's spine.

There was something indescribably precious about this moment. The contrast between violence and intimacy was like that of night and day; the contrast between a sub crying out for pain like a wanton whore and him cradling against the chest of his tormentor with a soft caress was like the core of the earth and outer space. Yet here they were, both coming down from something so beautifully brutal, and gently descending into this sweet, innocent moment of tender affection.

Eren hummed. "I love you, Levi."

Levi froze. He looked down at Eren, who had his eyes closed and was smiling, content. Did Eren just say…

He listened as the sweet melody of Eva settled in their little world. Levi listened, frozen, as he deliberated what he had just heard. A part of him knew that it was nothing more than the high, the endorphins and adrenalin from having brushed shoulders with danger, from having thrown a middle finger to survival instinct. Yet a part of him wondered if those words were true, and if they were, how long had Eren held onto them.

No, they couldn't possibly be true. Another shift in Eren's position, a quiet moan, startled Levi back into conscious thought.

Eren's heart belonged to another man. Eren had loved Jean for a long time; it was impossible for him to have fallen in love with Levi in this short time. Levi was the last person to say that it was not impossible with time, and even he had thought that he himself had already begun to tread that path. He knew that he and Eren would fall in love with one another quickly, but this…it was _too_ fast. Perhaps Eren was not delusional from his high, but simply expressing his infatuation, admiration and like for Levi in the most convenient way…in the only way a brat of twenty-three may know how.

"That was amazing," Eren suddenly whispered. His voice was no longer dreamy, but it held the thick grogginess of someone who had just awoken.

Now was not the time to deliberate a brat's words uttered in the wake of a play.

"I'm glad you liked it, Eren," Levi said as he brushed Eren's hair out of his face. "How do you feel?"

The brunette shifted so that he could look Levi in the eyes. Levi smiled as drunken eyes met with his own. "Calm enough to be a monk."

A quiet chuckle bubbled up at the back of Levi's throat. "I don't think monks are allowed to do this shit."

"Oh god, I wouldn't last a day as a monk," Eren said. He pushed himself off Levi and sat up.

 _That was quick_ , Levi thought, no contempt whatsoever. It was a mere observation, and a pleasant one at that. It brought him joy to know that Eren was feeling exponentially better after this play than he was the first.

Which brought an interesting thought to his mind; was Eren as perturbed by intimacy as he was? Was Eren's coming down from the previous play so violent because it was the first time, or because it was a slow, sensual and intimate play? Was the brunette accustomed to violence, even in sacred acts? Was violence more comforting to him than tenderness? And most importantly, was Eren this way because it was just how he was, or because life had made him this way? Levi's heart clenched at these thoughts. He and Eren were more in common that he'd thought.

"Are you in pain?" Levi asked.

"Nah," Eren answered. "My back feels as hot as lava, though."

Levi nodded. "Would you lie on your stomach for me? I want to make sure that there are no open cuts."

"Open cuts?" Eren cried out.

"Just standard procedure, my brat," Levi said, ruffling Eren's hair. "It doesn't happen often, but it's not impossible to break skin. Every time we do any impact play, I will check for broken skin that may need medical attention."

The younger man snickered as he obliged. "You're so thorough."

"I take great pride in what I do," Levi said flatly. "This isn't just some kink. It's a passion, and a hobby, and I'd rather not do it at all than half-ass it."

Eren only hummed in response. After grabbing a torch, Levi set to work examining Eren's back. Oh, he had done a number on the brunette, alright. The welts were angry and red, and the bruises deep and taunting, but fortunately, no skin had been broken. Levi was actually quite surprised he had managed to inflict this much damage with his weak hand. As he examined his canvass, Levi once again found himself in awe at Eren's demeanor. Once again, without prompt, the brunette switched from greedy submissive to normal old Eren.

If Eren wasn't _made_ to be Levi's sub, Levi did not know what gravity was.

"No blood," Levi announced.

"Aww," Eren said. "No fair."

"Another time, my precious one," Levi said, trailing his fingers along the Eren's back. The touch made the brunette shudder. "Let's go get you into a bath."

Eren snickered. "Is that code for "let's get freaky"?"

It took a gargantuan effort to not roll his eyes. "No, brat, it's English for "you're fucking filthy, get clean"."

Again, Eren laughed. He was so jovial, it was almost mind-blowing. The beast Levi had seen only minutes earlier had completely returned to its cave.

"I guess you want to tidy up?" Eren asked as he sat up.

"Would you mind if I do?" Levi asked. He wanted nothing more than to clean all the cum from his floor, but right now, even though Eren appeared fine, Eren was the priority.

 _Bye-bye beautiful, bye-bye beautiful!_

A goofy grin lit up Eren's face, enunciating his boyish innocence. For a moment, Levi could not believe he had just done what had been done to this innocent thing. "Nightwish has spoken," Eren said. He leaned forward and gave Levi a soft kiss on his cheek. "I'll get a bath ready for us."

With that, Eren jumped up, taking a moment to steady himself on his legs, and as the music came to it, he turned to Levi and mouthed, "Bye-bye beautiful."

Maybe those three words were said with some inkling of cognition.

* * *

 **After such a long wait, I think it's only fair to reward your patience, my darlings. The good news is I am off for a couple of weeks so I should be able to write...I'd like to finish this fic before work flares up again. The bad news is I have an exam to study for. It's only one, but my brain is mush, so it will take a couple of weeks.**

 **Thanks once again for sticking around. Please leave your thoughts :)**

 **OS**


	39. Chapter 39: Mikasa

**A/N: We know the drill by now. Updates are always late. *rolls my eyes***

 **Thank you for sticking around, though! I really appreciate the support, especially now that inspiration is running a bit thin. The story went in a direction I didn't anticipate, which is making it difficult to keep up with. I've actually seriously considered scrapping the project entirely, but I don't want to do that to you all. So please bear with me!**

 **Thank you for the kind words as well, the support and encouragement. I promise to dig deep to keep this one going.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SnK, its characters or any other brands mentioned in this story.**

* * *

Two more days.

Eren stood in the kitchen, torso bare as he stared at the calendar that sported an ominous red circle around the upcoming Saturday. In only two days, he would face off against his arch nemesis; the man who not only broke his heart and ran the shattered pieces into the ground, but who also ripped his pride to shreds by humiliating him time and again. Eren had been waiting for this day for months, and now that it was just around the corner, he found himself salivating at the thought of pulverizing Jean Kirstein's pretty face.

A chuffed grin twisted Eren's lips up as he thought about the Saturday that had passed. For the first time ever, he had bested Jean in the ring. Oh, it felt so _damn good_ to feel that asshole's soft flesh under his angry fists. The _thud_ of knuckles against flesh damn near aroused Eren as he pinned his ex-boyfriend to the ground and beat him with the intention of, well…killing him. Of course, he would never go that far, but he took Levi's words to heart and continued hitting, making sure Jean would not get up and have a chance to fight back.

However rewarding the experience was, the thing that stood out most to Eren was the manner in which he had gotten the upper hand. He had employed the teasing tactic Levi had taught him, taunting Jean until Jean's patience ran out. He was not above denying that it had tested his patience as well; he was itching for the fight from the moment he stepped in the ring, but as Levi had promised, his patience eventually paid off.

Eren had seen fighters do that countless times before. He had seen fighters defeat their opponents with a single blow following a charge. As Levi had said, not only did it frustrate the opponent – and frustration was the key to a fighter losing form – but it also gave you time to read the person. By the time they strike, you would have figured out exactly what it was they wanted to do, affording you the luxury of time to not only block or dodge, but also to retaliate swiftly. Eren had admired that tactic – it made for great TV – but had never considered trying it for himself. His patience was too thin, and his fighting ability limited to brawling.

Levi had helped him overcome that by instilling discipline in him through rigorous training.

 _Thank you, Levi_ , Eren thought as he took a sip of his green tea. Honestly, he hated the stuff, but Levi had insisted he drink at least one cup of green tea with a teaspoon of honey every day. Something about detoxing; Eren honestly hadn't listened to the spiel the man spat about the benefits of green tea and ginseng and whatever else. The only reason he was humoring Levi was because he wanted to impress him.

Now all that was left to do to _really_ impress Levi would be to take what happened the previous Saturday and superimpose it onto the coming one. If he could best Jean in the ring, just one more time – the time it would count most – then he would _officially_ be the better fighter. He would be the stronger man. He would be the victor.

Levi would be damn proud of him.

For the first time since setting his mind on this goal, Eren had a reason other than himself to achieve it. While he had always been lead to believe that he shouldn't do things for others, and rather for himself and aim to best himself, he had to admit it was nice knowing that there was someone he wanted to work to impress…someone that was actually expecting him to succeed and that would be happy if he did. It just added that little extra spark to the inspiration to win.

The front door opened then. Eren thought nothing of it, continuing his musings as he stared at the calendar. A moment later, Mikasa's voice called his name, to which he mechanically replied with a hum.

"Oh, you're home!" Mikasa said, voice elated and surprise clear in its tone.

"You make it sound like I'm never here," Eren said, turning to face the entry to the kitchen just as Mikasa appeared in it.

"To what do I owe the pleasure?" Mikasa asked.

Eren rolled his eyes before taking some of the grocery packets from Mikasa's hands. As he turned to place the packets on the counter, he heard a gasp behind him, but before he could so much as turn to inquire about it, Mikasa spoke, voice borderline hysterical.

"What the fuck happened to your back?"

"My back?" Eren asked, foolishly attempting to turn and look. Like a dog trying to catch its tail, Eren spun once this way and then that, before abandoning his quest.

Just as he was about to twist his arm to reach around to his own back, he felt Mikasa's cold, delicate fingertips grazing his skin. The second those digits touched him, another gasp, this one barely audible, escaped his sister's lips. Curious as to the source of her distress, Eren quickly twisted about until his fingers were running along his back beside Mikasa's. As soon as his fingertips brushed a series of welts raised on his skin, he realized what Mikasa had seen.

A blush dusted his cheeks as he remembered the sweet torture of Levi's ministrations, the power of the man's blows and the fluidity of each strike. He remembered being brought to a mind-numbing orgasm, and for the second time feeling that satisfaction transcended much deeper than just the physical plane. It was as if each blow Levi delivered injected him with a drug that heightened his ability to feel pleasure.

Eren shook his head as he turned away from Mikasa, attempting to free his back from her frantic fingers. "It's nothing," he said.

"That's not nothing, Eren," Mikasa snapped, voice low and threatening. She stared at Eren with dangerous, bloodthirsty eyes, making the brunet cower slightly despite being the bigger of the two. "It looks like someone _whipped_ you."

 _That's not_ too _far off_ , Eren thought sardonically, but he found himself wondering how his back really looked.

As if reading his mind, Mikasa produced her phone and quickly opened up her camera, wasting no time in forcing Eren into a position where she could take a picture of his back. It never failed to surprise the brunet just how strong Mikasa was, something that he tended to remember whenever she manhandled him much like this. She then handed Eren her phone, eyes narrowing dangerously as she watched him assess the damage to his own body.

Eren wouldn't have been able to stop his eyes from widening even if he tried. A quiet expletive fell from his lips as he stared at the picture of his back. Dark red and blue marks littered his shoulders and upper to mid back. To the naked eye, the patterns were erratic, but to the one who had been privy to the event, Eren could track and trace every flick of Levi's wrist in the marks left behind. He had to admit, seeing the picture made him feel exceptionally proud; Levi had _marked_ him. It was beautiful.

"What the hell are you smiling at?" Mikasa asked.

Only when Eren frowned in confusion at Mikasa's question, had he realized he'd been smiling. Instead of offer an explanation, he simply shrugged with a stiff shake of his head, before handing the phone back to Mikasa. There was truly nothing he could say; no lie that he could possibly come up with would be sufficient to explain why he looked like a disobedient slave that had been punished by his master.

"It's really nothing, Mika," Eren said, before slipping past her. Ignoring her protest and calls, Eren dashed to his room and shut his door before launching himself into his wardrobe in search of a shirt.

If he had known his back looked the way it did, he would have never been walking bare-chested in the apartment. However, thinking back to the previous night, it was actually obvious that there would've been some evidence of their play. Eren wanted to kick himself for neglecting to consider the aftermath of the flogging.

With his torso now covered, Eren ventured out of his bedroom. While the thought of remaining cooped up in his sanctuary definitely crossed his mind, albeit briefly, Eren knew he was better off facing Mikasa without giving her time to brood about the matter at hand.

"Eren, who did that to you?" Mikasa asked. Her voice was quiet, low, but it was laced with venom and the promise of a world of pain to whoever dared lay hands on her brother. When Eren turned to face her, he flinched at the look in her eyes – it was a look of someone out for blood.

Eren did not know what to say. He did not want to lie – he would get into more shit because he _would_ get caught in his lie, and then Mikasa would give it to him. He did not want to tell her the truth either…god forbid she knew he willingly let someone do this to him _and_ got off on it! He cringed at the mere thought of _anyone_ knowing that.

Cornered, Eren blurted the first thing that came to mind, "I'm a fighter, Mika. I'm going to get hurt now and then."

Even Eren knew how lame his excuse sounded, but he hoped that it would at least buy him time. Hah, what had possessed him to think that? The poor excuse would only further deepen Mikasa's suspicion. Eren was screwed, and he knew it.

"That's not from MMA!" Mikasa hissed. Eren flinched at her tone. "I'm not stupid, Eren."

"I never said you were," Eren mumbled as he averted his eyes. A niggle of guilt tugged at his mind; it had sounded like he had taken Mikasa for a simpleton, even if that was not his intention.

"You've been staying out a lot lately."

Eren clenched his jaw, brows drawing over his eyes as he forced them to remain focused on the floor. He knew that if he were to meet Mikasa's gaze, he would falter under the weight of it and confess. He did not want her knowing about his relationship with Levi, and was willing to bet Levi would concur. If he stayed in this position any longer, the cat would be let out of the bag.

"I'm going to shower," Eren said, attempting to brush past Mikasa but being stopped by her sturdy mass.

The blockage had Eren's head snapping up, even if only in question, and as soon as his eyes met with Mikasa's, he took a step back. That woman had the power to make a grown man feel like a naughty boy being scolded for bringing dirt into the house on his shoes, an effect that was exacerbated by Eren's sensitivity to Mikasa's harsh glare.

"You've been spending a lot of time with that Ackerman guy."

 _Bingo_ , Eren thought, swallowing thickly as his eyes darted away from Mikasa's once again. The movement did not go unnoticed by Mikasa, who now knew she had hit the nail on the head. Eren knew it would only be a matter of time before she put two and two together, but still he attempted to fight back.

"I know," Eren said softly, "he's training me."

"Throughout the night?" Mikasa hissed. "We've had this conversation before, Eren. What is your relationship with this man?"

"Mikasa, please just drop it."

Mikasa inhaled sharply. "You're seeing him, aren't you?"

"It's not like that, Mika!" Eren said, voice borderline whining. She simply raised a brow at him, and he could understand why; even he did not believe what he'd just told her. It was very much like _that_.

"Then what is it like, Eren?" she asked. The challenge was clear in her voice because she knew that she had Eren right where she wanted him – on the verge of the truth, just waiting to extort a confession. "Because, and I'm no expert here so correct me if I'm wrong, but there's not much that can do _that_ to a person's back."

Eren's grimace deepened, further solidifying Mikasa's standpoint. Still, Eren said nothing. He knew Mikasa had figured it all out by now, and all he could do now was bite his tongue and weather the storm.

A pregnant silence settled between them as Mikasa glared at Eren and Eren stared at a spot on the floor. For a long moment, neither spoke, moved or seemingly even dared to breathe. Eren had no desire to talk, while Mikasa patiently waited for him to, giving him the chance to come clean. When he relented in his silence, Mikasa sighed, and when she spoke again, her voice was quiet but laced with distaste.

"He's hurting you."

That caught Eren's attention. The brunet's head snapped up, emerald eyes livid as they met with the concerned eyes of his sister. In that moment, Eren saw none of the concern, and was quick to mistake it for blatant accusation.

"He's not hurting me!" Eren snapped. "This was consensual!"

"You let him whip you?" Mikasa countered, voice raising as Eren's hysterics began to excite her as well.

"Flog, not whip!" Eren corrected, not even bothering to berate himself for divulging that information.

"What the fuck is that even?"

"Drop it, Mika!" Eren growled. "I'm not going to tell you every fucking detail of my sex life! You're my sister, for fuck's sakes!"

Mikasa was disarmed. Instantly. "Sex life?"

 _Oh fuck_.

"So you are sleeping with him?" Mikasa hissed.

"I am _not_ sleeping with him," Eren said, and it was clear even to Mikasa that there was no lie in his words. When he pushed to pass her, he was met with no resistance as he made his way to the bathroom. At the bathroom door, he turned slightly, still not looking at his sister as he said, "And even if I were, whatever I choose to do with him is _my_ business, not yours."

Once in the bathroom, Eren slammed the door shut and immediately locked it. The remnants of his anger lingered in his blood, mixing with the fear of being caught, the fear of spilling a secret Levi did not want the world to know. Trembling, Eren stared at himself in the mirror for an immeasurable amount of time, holding his gaze as he willed the fear to dissipate. He chanted quietly to himself – in, hold, out – regulating his breathing as he fought to bring his heart rate down.

Eventually, Eren was calm; he felt no anger and saw no fear in his eyes, and the trembling had stopped. He stripped himself bare then, turning this way and that to present his back to the mirror in an attempt to assess the marks Levi had left behind. A small smile tugged at his lips as his eyes traced along the reddened lines, drinking in the dark bruises that littered his back around them. They did look quite out of place – Mikasa's concern was definitely not misplaced – but they did not look nearly as bad as the photo had made them out to be. He wondered if what Mikasa's eyes saw was what the photo had revealed; perhaps the lighting in the kitchen had made it look worse to the naked eye.

Either way, Eren was unperturbed. He would wear them with price. He loved that his skin bore testament to Levi's ministrations. That play was not just a flogging, but it was a step forward for both of them. These marks signified a part of their journey, and they made Eren feel wanted, owned, and dare he say, loved.

With that thought, Eren turned on the shower and soon found himself under the scalding stream of water, its heat slightly aggravating the sensitive skin on his back and allowing him to fully relive the sensational night he'd had with Levi. He wondered if, and when, Levi would present him with a collar.

When Eren emerged from the bathroom, he considered making straight for his bedroom, but his hunger had him meandering towards the kitchen. The last thing he wanted was to be confronted by Mikasa again, so he moved as silently as possible down the hallway. When he came to the living room, he frowned when he saw Mikasa sitting in front of the TV, staring blankly at the thing as she mindlessly flipped through the channels.

At first, he was going to ignore her, grab something to eat and head to his room, but something rooted him in place. He took a moment to look at Mikasa, to _really look_ at her. His eyes traced along her hair, down to her shoulders, until they disappeared behind the backrest of the couch. There was absolutely nothing about her posture that gave it away, but her mindlessness at this moment was the only tell that she was upset. She would never admit it, not allow anything to give her away, but to Eren, who knew her better than anyone, it was as obvious as the sun in the afternoon sky.

He sighed quietly before coming to sit beside her, snuggling up to her with his arm resting on the couch's backrest. It took a few seconds, but eventually Mikasa dropped her head against Eren's shoulder. He smiled at this and immediately set to running his fingers through her silky hair.

"You've become very secretive and distant lately, you know," Mikasa said softly.

That was the truth, and Eren wasn't above acknowledging this. Ever since he had begun to pursue a relationship with Levi, Eren inadvertently swore himself to secrecy. He spent more time at the dojo, and at Levi's house, than he did at home around Mikasa, and because of Levi being in the closet, he couldn't tell his own sister where he was or what he was doing. It had him withdraw from her, feeling it better to avoid her entirely than be forced to lie to her face.

"I know," Eren said.

"It's that man, isn't it?" Mikasa whispered.

"Mika…"

"I don't want to fight with you, Eren. I just want to talk to you about it."

Eren sighed. There was no getting out of this. Mikasa had already figured it out, and was passive enough to have a normal conversation about it. Eren decided that he would be open with her…he would talk to Levi about it another time.

Family first.

"I'm seeing Levi," Eren admitted. Mikasa stiffened.

"For how long?" she asked.

"I dunno. A few weeks?"

"What about Jean?"

It was Eren who stiffened now. "What about him?"

"Are you over him?"

Of course that question would come. Eren's life had revolved around Jean for as far back as anyone close to him could remember. If he weren't infatuated by Jean he was murderously enraged by the man. If it wasn't pining after him, it was being tossed aside after being used by that fucker. His obsessive love and infatuation had become so integral in his life that Eren, and those closest to him, had feared he would never had a normal functioning relationship again.

"I told Levi that my feelings for Jean aren't going to disappear overnight," Eren said honestly. "He understands that, but said to me that if I want to be with Jean, I mustn't fuck around with him. He doesn't have time to be toyed with, and if I am not serious, I can fuck off."

"He sounds charming," Mikasa mumbled, which had Eren laugh quietly.

"He's a piece of work, I can tell you that."

They settled in comfortable silence wherein Eren's eyes flickered to the TV screen. He watched as orcas toyed with a seal, violently tossing it up in the air. He scowled at this, the point that violence and malice is natural being reiterated in the images on the screen.

"What if he's fucking with you?" Mikasa asked.

"He's not," Eren answered quickly.

"How sure are you? He is almost mid-thirties, is he not? He's successful. He could have anyone he wants, I'm sure. It's easy to throw around money and status to lure young people in."

"Seriously?" Eren said, raising a brow as he glared at Mikasa incredulously from the corner of his eye.

Mikasa shrugged, showing Eren she did not intend to break the peace with her words.

"You know this guy has never trained someone like this before me?" Eren said. His chest swelled with pride at having been the one to break Levi's solemn vow.

"That you know of…"

"Mika, I've been a fan of this guy for as long as he's been a pro fighter. I know he's never trained anyone like this before. He was just never interested in it. Hated the idea, actually."

"Then why you?"

It was a valid question. Had Eren not asked it just the night before? That conversation, however, was between him and Levi, so instead of even trying to filter it, Eren simply said, "He'd a really good guy, Mika. He's done a lot for me. You know, I think I'm actually going to beat Jean on Saturday, thanks to Levi."

A small smile tugged at Mikasa's lips. "You better kick his ass." She shifted then so that she could look at Eren, and when their eyes met, Eren could recognize the fear and uncertainty in her eyes. "I'm just worried. You understand, right? The last man that you fell in love with turned out to be a complete pig, and I knew him. I don't know this Levi-guy, and he is rich and famous…who knows how many Erens he has on the side."

"Don't talk about him like that if you don't know him," Eren snapped. Mikasa recoiled, but Eren felt no pity. To say something like that about Levi…Eren grit his teeth. "He's a damn decent guy."

"Sorry," Mikasa murmured. She offered Eren a sheepish, apologetic smile that instantly disarmed the brunet. "You can't blame me for being worried about you."

"I guess not."

A comfortable silence settled between them as they both turned their attention to the TV. The orcas were enjoying their meal, but neither Eren nor Mikasa were paying full attention to the muted documentary. Eren was simply grateful that Mikasa did not pry further, and that she did not further antagonize Levi. She had her concerns, which Eren had to admit were somewhat valid – just maybe – and she was being relatively civil about it. Eren had to hand it to her…she knew how to keep the peace when she wanted to.

"Say," Eren chirped up, raising a brow as a mischievous grin toyed with the corners of his lips, "don't you have a special somebody?"

Mikasa snorted. "How many times must I tell you? I don't have time to entertain men."

"You're married to your job, I swear."

Mikasa laughed quietly. "I am."

Eren rocked side to side, nudging Mikasa playfully with his shoulder. "You need to make time for yourself, you know. Your biological clock is ticking."

Mikasa gasped, and in one blindingly fast movement, pulled away from Eren and planted a numbing punch on his shoulder which caused the man to yelp as he jerked away from her, cradling his wounded deltoid.

"Fuck off!" Mikasa growled, a playful undertone to her voice. "Maybe I don't even want kids!"

Eren chuckled, face scrunched up in pain. "Geez, you hit hard. I told Levi you should've been at Titan, not me."

"Eh…" Mikasa shrugged. "I'm better at patching people up than I am breaking them."

The two continued to bicker back and forth about menial things, spending the rest of the afternoon and the evening enjoying each other's company. Mikasa promised to give Levi a chance, and asked if they could officially meet, a request Eren eagerly agreed to. He would have to talk to Levi about it, of course, but was sure the man wouldn't mind. Eren and Mikasa ended up watching a movie later in the evening, with Mikasa making a wholesome salad and a massive lean steak for Eren, forbidding him from drinking soda and instead compensated with enhanced sparkling water. It was the healthiest movie night Eren had had in his life – snacking on baby carrots, seriously? – but he appreciated Mikasa's effort in keeping junk out of his body so close to his competition.

He didn't say it often, but he loved this woman fiercely.

* * *

 **Thank you for the read!**

 **OS**


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